Chapter 31
Chapter Thirty-One
Noah
“Dr. Hackworth, you’re needed in surgery.”
The sounds and smells of the hospital leave me numbly in disbelief. How did we get here? How did this happen?
“It didn’t look good. I tell you that young girl is lucky to be alive.” A male nurse discusses his latest case with his colleague as they pass by. I look up slightly as they walk down the hallway to my left before hanging my head low and resting my elbows on my knees.
“What if I can’t promise you forever.”
My stomach revolts. My breathing quickens and then becomes so slow I question if I am having a heart attack. Taking a few deep breaths, I try to calm my nerves. My right knee begins to bounce up and down rapidly.
We still don’t have any word. What can be taking so long?
I look up and see Gwen huddled in a far corner with Rex. And although it seems odd watching the two of them actually getting along and seeing Rex console her, it doesn’t take long before my head is filled with memories and words that put their peculiar display on the back burner.
“I love you. If loving you is wrong, I will take my chances.”
Damn it! I jump to my feet and start pacing the hallway with such haste it causes strangers to look my way. Catching the eye of Gwen and Rex, I look up as Michael walks down the hallway towards us scrubbing a hand down his face in worry.
“Still no word?” Rex asks as Michael walks past. His eyes are trained on mine with an intensity I haven’t seen since that night on the patio a few months back. Stopping right in front of me, I take a few steps back as I wait for him to speak.
“You better pray to whoever it is you pray to that she is okay,” he snaps before walking off.
Letting out a deep breath, I walk up to the nurse’s station. It has been almost two hours. Eva’s parents showed up and were immediately rushed back into the E.R. while the rest of us gathered and were forced to remain in agony in the small waiting room.
“Excuse me, Miss,” I say loudly. The brown haired nurse is deep in a giggling conversation with her colleague and looks up annoyed.
“I’m sorry, I hate to… It’s just, is there any word yet on Eva Monroe?
I mean it has been almost two hours and most of us out here don’t even know if she is…
” My voice trails off as emotion burns the back of my throat.
I look down at the counter briefly, gathering myself, before glancing back up at the two ladies'.
“We would just appreciate any news if you have it?”
My plea for help is met with a roll of the eyes that reminds me of the girl somewhere in this God-forsaken hospital that just may or may not be fighting for her life after the argument we got in earlier today.
“I told you, sir. The doctor will be out with any news once there is some. Nothing has changed hospital policy in the last few minutes since the last time you asked.”
I smile sarcastically at them, then angrily push off the counter and walk to the right towards Rex and Gwen.
Pacing back and forth in front of the two of them, I glance up to see Rex pull Gwen in close and whisper something in her ear - and although I know grief always brings out a different side in people, I have to admit, it is strange to see the two of them so close.
“I don’t want to keep you from anything, I don’t want to make you regret anything in life.”
Her words ring through my head. I can’t shake them. Regret. Mistakes. Forever. The pain inside makes me want to hurt someone. Instinctively, I punch the wall to my right, once, twice, three times before I get startled looks from guests and staff and stop.
“What did you do, Noah?” Gwen asks angrily, rising from her seat. “What did you say to her?”
Rex grabs a hold of her shoulders and quietly tries to console her.
“Did you do this?” Gwen cries, attempting to break out of Rex’s hold. “What the fuck did you say to her?”
I flinch and avert my eyes to the floor. I swallow over a lump in my throat as my mouth goes dry. I have no words, nothing to say to Eva’s best friend because - I did do this. I pushed her away. I’m the reason we are standing in this waiting room wondering if Eva is alive or dead.
Gwen yells, “I’ve already lost one sister you bastard. I can’t lose another.”
My defenses kick in. “You can’t lose her?” I shout back. “Do you think I did this on purpose? I love her, Gwen. Damn it I love her more than I love myself. I’d trade places with her in an instant if I knew I could.”
Rex steps in between the two of us and pulls Gwen into his arms. Running his fingers through her hair, she sobs uncontrollably into his chest. Looking up at me, Rex gives me an understanding look which is laced with an acknowledgment between the two of us not to push this right now.
I start to walk away when I hear Gwen whisper, “I tried to warn Eva about you. I tried to make her listen.”
I stop and turn to face Gwen, who is still sobbing into Rex’s shirt.
He catches my eye and gives me an inquisitive look which tells me he is just as surprised to hear this confession as I am.
Just as I am about to speak, the doors leading back into the E.R.
open, and two doctors come walking out deep in conversation.
They stop briefly to discuss something before walking further into the waiting room.
“Who here is the family of Eva Monroe?” One of the two men says before the other walks off in the direction of the cafeteria.
Rex waves Michael in from outside as Gwen and I both look at each other wondering who should answer. Before I can decide what kind of trouble I may get in for lying, the fear of the doctor walking away and leaving us without any word takes over.
“I am,” I stammer. I get a heated look from Gwen who obviously isn’t too happy, but to hell with her right now. I look over to see Rex has successfully waved Micheal back into the room, and the two of them are hurriedly making their way over to us.
“I mean, we all are,” I explain as the four of us gather to hopefully not hear what we have been dreading for the past two hours. The doctor looks at me as if he’s not exactly buying what I am saying. Thankfully, Michael speaks up before he catches onto my lie.
“I am her brother,” he offers. “My parents have been back there for hours. Please, what is going on? Can you tell us anything? We all just want to know if she is alright.”
The doctor places a pen in his right front pocket. Glancing back up at us, time draws on forever as we all wait impatiently to hear what he has to say.
Finally, he says, “She’s going to be alright.”
Collectively we all begin to breathe deeper than we have all afternoon at finally hearing the five words we had all hoped for.
Gwen immediately starts crying, and Rex rushes to her side.
Michael and I stand there in joyful shock.
Still shaken up, but relieved we finally received the news we had hoped for, I look up and say a silent thank you to the one above for pulling her through.
“She suffered quite a few broken ribs, a broken left arm, and a broken right leg from the crash. We’ve monitored her closely because of her concussion and the fact she was unconscious for a while.
We wanted to make sure there was no swelling or bleeding on the brain due to the intensity of her accident.
But, overall, she was one lucky girl. It could have been a million times worse.
Along with a few bumps and bruises, she should heal up just fine. ”
The doctor continues speaking, but I don’t hear a word. All voices fade into a blur as I take a few steps backward and fall into a chair. The relief she will be okay takes over and causes myself to give in to the tears that threatened to break free a few minutes ago.
“We are going to keep her at least one night to monitor everything. Your parents, Michael, have asked for you to be brought back. Unfortunately, we are closing soon, so the rest of you will have to check back tomorrow.”
I glance up at Gwen just as she looks my way as well, Anxiety builds between us from the knowledge we won’t be able to see her today.
“But,” Gwen starts to beg. “We’ve been waiting here all day. Please doctor, I need to see her.”
Her pleading is left on deaf ears as the doctor walks away with Michael.
“I’m sorry Miss,” he says before disappearing behind the large doors. “You will have to come back tomorrow. She needs her rest.”
As the doors to the E.R. close behind him, a silence settles between the three of us.
Even though I’m anxious to see her, to hold her, to tell her everything I had planned to say before receiving Gwen’s phone call earlier this afternoon - I try to rest in knowing she will be okay.
I will see her tomorrow. We can still have forever. If she’ll let us.
Rex grabs ahold of Gwen’s elbow and starts leading her toward the exit. “I’ll drive you home, sweetheart.”. She doesn’t fight him, just leans in as he slowly gives her the strength she needs, and the two of them gradually make their way toward the parking lot.
I, however, make no move toward the exit. Standing in the waiting room, I find myself a mix of emotions. As the day’s events fuse together with the past and the future I want with the girl somewhere just behind those closed doors all I can do is hope.
Hope, after everything that’s been said and done, she’ll still have me.