13. Nash
thirteen
Nash
“What if we can stop it?” The words tumble out of my mouth before I can catch and swallow them back.
Nothing can stop the heat. Nothing can change a scent-match, so why, why in god’s name did I say that?
Because she’s hurting, and I need her not to.
“What?” Cassidy shouts in disbelief.
Both of my packmates turn to look at me, wide gazes full of questions, but at least Hank keeps his doubts to himself.
“Can you do that?” Indigo’s soft voice is hopeful for the first time.
“I have to be honest with you.” I lick my lips. “There’s nothing that will completely stop the heat. But a few things can keep it at bay. Things to make you comfortable.”
Her eyebrows pinch, and she nods, trying to follow. “Is it a medicine?”
“No. Nothing like that is available, but we can fight this.”
“And we can promise not to touch you. Doesn’t matter how much you beg.” Hank’s voice is low, but it gets her attention.
For the first time ever, she steps in our direction.
“Do you mean it?”
He dips his chin. “Are you of sound mind right now?” She nods. “Well, so we’ll take your wishes now. Nothing you say later, while struggling, will change it. We won’t touch you.”
“Never,” Cassidy echoes.
Indigo turns her gaze to me, waiting for my confirmation.
Is it the rotten smell of her fear that got into our heads?
Are we so desperate for her approval that we make promises no man can keep?
I just promised to stop a heat I’m sure I can’t, and now we are saying we won’t touch our Omega even if she begs.
Jesus Christ.
“No one will touch you without your say-so while lucid.”
She narrows her eyes, but the foul scent changes slightly, showing me she’s not as scared as before.
“What if I never agree with this?”
I swallow dry, wishing I had a goddamn shot of whiskey to chase away the impossible promises I’m making today. I rub my hand over my face and shrug.
“We’ll never do anything without your consent, Indigo. If you don’t want us, then this is as far as we’ll get to you.” And probably die in the process, but I don’t say that part out loud.
The space between us throbs and begs to be demolished, but her chin is up, her stance proud as if she can’t feel the pull. If I couldn’t see in her face and body that she’s struggling, I’d think she didn’t care. And that’s what really brings us here, isn’t it?
She’s suffering. Her nipples are pebbling against the soft material of her shirt, her cheeks are flushed, and a delicious drop of sweat runs between her breasts. She’s not unaffected, yet she’s so scared of this scent-match that she prefers this to us.
“You don’t need to stay on the other side of the room.” She shrugs. “As long as you don’t fuck me without my consent, you can come closer.”
Her crude words are a slap in my face, but I try not to react to them. It’s a privilege to be innocent to the horrors of life. Indigo spells it out because she lived through it, and if I’m not man enough to even hear what happened to her, then I definitely don’t deserve to be her Alpha.
“Okay.” I slap my hands together. “I’ll make some calls. My grandfather is a doctor. He’ll know what can help, and I’ll get a list. While I’m doing that, Hank, start the bath, and Cassidy, grab ice from the ice machine. A lot of ice.”
“What?” Indigo asks as I scroll through my phone for Papaw’s number.
“We need to bring the heat down. An ice bath will help.”
Before she can protest, the call connects, and I leave the room for some privacy. I don’t want her to know how insane this plan truly is.
“My boy!” Papaw answers after two rings.
Papaw is one of Dad Levi's dads. He’s always been a proud father even though his son didn’t follow in his footsteps and chose to pursue music instead of medicine.
My mom and dad did well as a country duo, and while they are the face of their music, my other dads are lyricists and producers.
Which means the whole pack was pursuing the same dream, but Papaw never questioned them.
Now that my parents are a household name, it’s hard to believe how much they went through.
I can’t flick through the radio without finding their music, but the road to success wasn’t smooth, and Papaw never gave up on them.
And that’s why he's the one I call when I decide to go forward with this insane plan.
“I heard the news. Congratulations, my boy. This is a miracle.”
He’s so fucking proud. I hear it in his voice, and I’m sick to my stomach to receive this amount of support when my Omega reeks of fear. Instead of entertaining his happiness, I tell the truth.
“She doesn’t want to be mated.”
Damn, that statement doesn’t even start to explain what is happening, but it’s a goddamn summary.
“No?”
“Is there anything I can help to soothe her heat, Papaw?”
“Nash…” he says, and even in my mind, I can imagine him shaking his head. So Papaw is supportive, but not insane. Got it.
“Papaw… I just need help.”
“Nothing can stop the heat.”
“I know,” I sigh. “But there are things that can help hold off, right? I heard about this.”
My chest hurts, so much grief taking space when I wish it was happiness. A call to your grandfather after a scent-matching. It’s supposed to be filled with joy, not whatever this is.
“I need time, Papaw. I know I can change her mind, but I need time, and biology is not giving me the time.”
“What if I never agree with this?”
Indigo’s words come back like a monster refusing to give up. I don’t want to dismiss her, but I need to believe that one day she’ll want us as much as we want her. If I only have more time to show her who we really are. If only she’s lucid enough to ever make the choice.
“You youngsters…” he tsks. “What is the point? This is a scent-match. It’s fate. Knot her, and then you have the rest of your life to make her fall in love.”
“She doesn’t want us,” I grit between my teeth. Damn Papaw for making me spell it out, something I’m not ready to say.
“Torturing you all won’t help the situation.”
No, it won’t. He’s right. I rub my face, taking a breath before talking. He doesn’t understand that giving Indigo this is the only way she will ever trust us.
“I need to try. She’ll never be ours unless we give her a chance.”
He’s quiet for a long moment, and I hold my breath. I knew it was crazy before I made this call, but I can’t leave her curled into a corner crying her eyes out because of me.
“Nash, I love you, but you’re asking me for advice on something that will only hurt you and your mate. Holding off the heat will tear this girl apart.”
“And what’s the alternative, Papaw?” I shake my head, pressing the heels of my hand into my eye socket. “She left, stole a damn truck to escape us. She’s scared. You know how much these Omegas suffered. She’s been abused and—”
“I know. I know.” I hear the understanding in his tone. “I just need to warn you as your grandfather and your doctor of the risks of what you’re doing.”
“Thank you. I know you have to say it.”
“Well, I do. But if you insist on being insane…”
“I absolutely do.”
“Then grab a pen.”