Chapter 36
REGGIE
Song- Dying To Love, Bad Omens
My whole life, when shit gets tough, I go to my brother.
Now? I can’t even do that.
I don’t blame him for this. He’s got no reason to feel guilty. It’s all on me.
Because I’m built like this, cold, cruel, always putting the mafia and everyone else’s needs first, never factoring myself into the equation.
And if Rowan can make Bella happy, I can’t stand in the way of that.
Yet Drago’s words keep circling in my head.
What if I did try with Bella?
That chemistry between us—it’s undeniable.
The guilt she felt for thinking she betrayed me with Rowan—that tells me something.
That deep down, she cares what I think.
Maybe if I hadn’t been such an asshole from the start, she would’ve come to me instead.
I pour another whiskey and knock it back. The burn does nothing.
Bella still hasn’t left the living room with the kitten. I think she’s too scared to even come near me.
This is where I’m fucking it all up.
I’ve never had feelings. Never had to navigate this kind of mess.
A damn kitten was never going to fix what I broke.
I push myself off the chair and head toward the living room.
She’s curled on the couch, wiping away a tear, the tiny ball of fur asleep in her lap.
And yet she’s smiling, and something tightens in my chest.
“Bella.”
She looks up and sniffles once. “Irish,” she says sheepishly.
“Stand up.” I crook a finger, motioning her toward me.
To my surprise, she obeys immediately.
I bite back the smirk threatening my mouth.
The battle isn’t lost, not completely.
She tugs at the hem of my brother’s T-shirt.
“Here.” My tone leaves no room for argument.
Her brow furrows for a second, fighting that inner brat I know too well.
Then, slowly, her feet move.
Step by step, until she’s right there in front of me.
Her scent hits first. It’s sweet, warm, and maddening.
Her eyes lock on mine.
And my heart starts to race like it’s trying to claw its way out of my chest.
There’s a flicker in her eyes. It’s not quite fear, nor defiance, but something in between.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she whispers.
“Because I don’t know what to do with you,” I answer honestly. “You drive me insane, Bella.”
Her throat bobs as she swallows. “Good. You deserve it.”
That earns her a quiet laugh, the first one I’ve managed in days.
“Always with the fire.”
“You wouldn’t like me without it.”
She’s right. I wouldn’t.
The truth hits me like a blade. I don’t want her quiet, or compliant, or easy. I want her exactly like this: stubborn and alive.
I step closer, my hand brushing her jaw. She doesn’t flinch, doesn’t move away.
“I meant what I said before. About regretting how I handled things. I’m not used to…”
The words die in my throat.
“Feeling?” she finishes softly.
I nod once. “Something like that.”
Her lips curve. “Then maybe stop fighting it.”
Something in me gives.
I cup her chin, tilting her face up. “If we start over, I have some terms.”
She exhales, a challenge and surrender all at once. “And what are your terms, Irish?”
My hand slides to the back of her neck, firm enough that she knows who’s in control.
“Honesty. No games, and I don’t shut you out when I’m trying not to feel.”
She nods slowly, eyes darkening. “And if I disobey?”
“Then I remind you who you’re dealing with.”
Her breath catches, but she doesn’t look away. If anything, she steps closer until the heat between us hums.
“So this is the clean slate?” she asks.
“This is the only one we get.”
Her lips part as she nods, and for the first time, it feels like the tension between us isn’t pulling us apart, it’s holding us there.
There’s still that unspoken tension between us. Rowan.
“I’m not asking you to stop whatever it is you have with my brother,” I tell her.
Even if the words stab me from the inside. I have no right. I’m not stopping them; I just want my own chance to show her what I could give her.
She smiles weakly and nods.
“Isn’t that going to be awkward? Between all of us?” she asks.
She’s clearly never been in a situation like this. Me and Rowan share. Except this time, there are feelings involved, and I’m not sure where this road leads us.
“I don’t know, Bella. I really don’t know. But the choice always rests with you. It’s you that has the power over both of us.”
I let my hand fall away, not because I want to, but because if I don’t, I won’t stop.
“Go get changed, Princess. We’ll start over at dinner.”
She grins faintly, that wicked spark flashing again. “Should I wear your shirt this time?”
I shake my head, fighting the smile tugging at my mouth. I want to tear this one right off her. But jealousy isn’t what I’m trying to show her.
“Wear one of your own, or nothing. Either works. Just not… his.”
Her eyes flicker up at me, that mix of defiance and something softer.
I lift my hand, running the backs of my fingers along her throat, not squeezing, not yet, just a whisper of contact. A warning. A promise.
Her breath hitches, the pulse beneath my fingertips beating wild.
“I’ve seen you twice now,” I murmur, leaning in closer. “Once with my brother, once with that girl at the party.”
Her lips part, but no words come.
“I’ve watched you fall apart for someone else, Princess.” I tilt my head, tracing that delicate column of her neck with my thumb. “Next time, it’ll be for me.”
With that, I release her and step back.
She turns to leave, and for a moment I just watch her go, the chaos she brings, the quiet she leaves behind.
Maybe this time, I’ll stop running from both.