24. In Which Safety Buddies are Assigned
Chapter 24
In Which Safety Buddies are Assigned
H is warm, calloused fingers brushed along her skin. Coiling along her neck’s slope, he glided them into her hair. His breath hot against the erratic pulse. Lips, soft, slow, playing with her own. Teasing her. One hand moved up her rib cage, igniting her already heated blood in a fevered frenzy. His eager moans thrummed through her as she kissed him back. Tongues entangled, sharing breath and soft murmurs. His tongue glided against hers, and she came undone.
Ellie brushed against him, urging him to continue. Her shoulder shook, her name on his lips, sounding soft through the haze of desire consuming her.
“Ellie?”
A moan crept its way up her throat. He was everywhere, close enough but not. His fresh, clean scent was intoxicating. Like freshly fallen snow. His breath brushed the shell of her ear.
“Ellie, wake up.”
She rocked against him again. Deep and husky, his voice rolled through her in waves. Her shoulder shook with more force this time.
“Wake up, you’re dreaming.”
Her eyes opened, the haze of lust and sleep clouding her vision. She blinked, adjusting to the dark room. Hard muscle flexed under her cheek.
“Ellie.”
The way he said her name had her biting her lip and moving her hips again, desire dissipating like a vapor as she realized it was a dream. Pushing against Evander’s chest, she snapped up, meeting his eyes in the dark. She was nestled next to him; her head had been resting on his chest, her leg slung over his, entangled.
The ghost of a memory of his kiss lingered on her lips, his tongue exploring. It felt so real. Suppressing a whine behind her teeth as his warm hand rested on her shoulder, she wanted to reach out and pull him to her, kiss him as she had been in her dream. Then it hit her. Blushing clear to her toes, she realized she was grinding her hips against him. Moaning and humping his leg like a damn horny dog in her sleep.
“Oh god.” Ellie hid her face with her hand.
“Problem?” His thinly veiled amusement rumbled through his chest at her expense.
“Oh god. Oh god!” came a groan, muffled between her hands and his bare chest.
“If you’re going to call out to a deity in bed, at least let me have some part in it.”
Ellie groaned again as his chuckle vibrated under her ear. Her forehead rubbed side to side against his skin as she shook her head, waiting to die of embarrassment. She pushed off him and moved to return to her side, trying to restore some sense of dignity.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “I must have wiggled over. I’m embarrassed. I’ll go back . . .”
“Stay.” His hand fell to her elbow, stopping her.
“What?”
“I don’t mind. Stay. If you want to and are comfortable, you should . . . stay.”
This wasn’t a good idea. Her all-too-real dream had left her aching, begging for something more. If she stayed wrapped up in him and allowed herself the satisfaction of continuing to be entangled, she was afraid she’d cross a line. Evander couldn’t possibly want her in the same way. He was merely sleeping here out of convenience not to have his thigh used to get her off during the night. She was making a fool of herself.
He was staring at the ceiling, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. He closed his eyes slowly; Ellie watched, mesmerized, as he drew his bottom lip between his teeth and bit down. His gaze darted to her, darkening, hungry. They stared at each other, fighting the pull, a spark between them. That muscle in his firm jaw flexed.
Ellie moved before she could overthink. Before he dissipated like a phantom, a whisper of what she wanted. Laying the length of his body, she pressed herself against him. When his fingertips danced along her jawline, she came alive. His eyes searched hers, questioning, silently asking permission. And Ellie desperately wanted to grant it. She had to know what those soft, full lips tasted like. Desired to know how another man kissed besides Penn. Evander’s startled surprise as she pressed her lips to his caused a brief smile. Tentatively, questioning, he kissed her back. His hand stroked up her neck, threaded through her hair, holding her in place. A shyness crept over them as if both were waiting for the other to object. When she pulled back, his eyes were still closed. His breath feathered against her lips, the feel of his kiss lingering.
“Kiss me again, Ellie. Just once.” His request was so low, so soft that she thought it more a prayer than an invitation.
Ellie let out a strangled moan as she captured his lips again, deepening their kiss. Evander kissing her back with the same intensity had her toes curling. His growl was low and reverberated through her, igniting her already heated blood. He pulled back, panting. Lustful sparks danced in his eyes. They darted from her lips to her eyes as if he were trying to decide if this was real. Fire rippled through her veins, roaring to life.
His forehead met hers. “Ellie, we shouldn’t—” but he never finished.
Enough with playing things safe; she wanted him. His hand caressing the back of her neck, holding her, was enough to spur her on. When she captured his lips again, she played, tasted, and teased until desire overcame her, sweeping her along. She licked along the seam, and he let out a soft moan that was swallowed up when she drove her tongue into his mouth. Clutching him to her, her hands were in his hair, on his neck, his shoulders. Ellie fanned kisses along his jawline, tracing perfection with her lips. His pulse hammered against her mouth. Locating his earlobe, she pulled it between her teeth. The guttural sound that escaped him fanned the flames.
“Ellie.”
“God, the way you say my name,” she said in between kisses. “Say it again.”
“Ellie,” he murmured breathlessly, pulling his head out of reach of her mouth. He was breathing hard, his lips swollen. She whimpered at the loss. “Ellie, I’m not supposed to—I’m here to protect you. I can’t. I want to. Gods, I want to but I’m not—it’s against—”
She protested, “I’m letting you,” and kissed the hollow of his neck.
“Rules,” he rasped.
“What rules?”
“I have rules I follow, Ellie, and if we continue, I’ll most assuredly break them.”
“Can’t you break them, just a little?”
He didn’t answer, just stared, brushing a wild curl behind her ear. A crease formed on her forehead as she tried to regain composure. In her fevered passion, Ellie had slipped her leg between his, causing his erection to press against her thigh. Moving her leg caused that delightfully erotic sound of air between his teeth. The same sound she had heard earlier when she bent over. He was trying to be sensible and obey whatever rules he imposed on himself. And in that moment, Ellie decided she hated rules. She moved her leg.
“Damn, keep doing that, and I’m liable to come like a young lad,” he said through gritted teeth.
Tilting her head, she innocently smiled. “What, this?”
Her leg rubbed against him again, and he shuddered. Forcefully, he grabbed the offending thigh, holding her still, and shot her a stern expression. Ellie fluttered her eyelashes.
“Am I doing something untoward, Your Highness?”
The muscles in his jaw ticked as he pursed his lips together. Her thigh in his firm grip, holding her while also caressing her, sent fire coursing through her veins. Shifting her weight, his thumb glided against her skin rhythmically.
“Kiss me,” she begged.
“I shouldn’t.” His blasted thumb continued to slide back and forth, sparks flying across her skin with each pass.
“Please?” she whispered, lowering her head and meeting his gaze.
He closed his eyes as if merely looking at her was torture. “Bloody hell.”
He slammed into her. His kiss was hard and demanding. The moan that escaped her as he rolled her onto her back surprised her. It came from somewhere deep, somewhere primal. His mouth was hot and needy, greedily parting her lips and slipping his tongue inside. Her insides melted, and she matched his intensity with her own. Pulling at his hair, running her hands along his shoulders and down his back. Their tongues mingled while her hands explored his body. His fingers played with the lace edging of her shorts. Mapping the contours of her ample hip with his one hand tore another sound from that primal place inside her. This wasn’t just desire coursing through her, it was something else, something deeper. His lips found the border of her mouth, then her jaw, then her neck. She returned the favor, kissing his neck, nipping him with her teeth. He was driving her crazy with his kisses; she needed more. She rocked against him, eliciting a hiss in response. Laying under the weight of this beautiful man, she was breathless, desiring him more than anyone she had before.
His hand rounded her hip to the part of her ass that stuck out of the bottom of her shorts, grabbing a handful, he squeezed. His reward was an involuntary buck.
“These fucking little shorts,” he murmured against her lips. “When I saw you in them, I had to hold myself back from taking liberties with you.”
His fingers grazed the inside of her thigh. His kiss-swollen lips curved into a wicked smile, sending heat straight to her core.
“Tell me what you want, Ellie.”
“I—I don’t know.” She was light-headed, almost drunk from his kisses. She pressed her lips into his neck, wanting him near.
“I need to know what you want. I’ll not continue until you tell me.”
“You?” She was breathless and uncertain. No one had ever asked her what she wanted. In her limited experience she’d always accepted that Penn took, never gave. And certainly never asked.
“Yes, but what? Where?” Evander laid kisses to her jaw, soft and tender, nudging her with his nose. She whimpered. “Tell me.”
“I want you to kiss me.” Her harsh whisper sounded gravely and desperate to her ears.
“Good girl.” He mumbled before slipping his lips along hers. She pulled back.
“What?”
Evander kissed her again, deeper, his tongue finding hers, tangling, exploring her mouth until she was delightfully dizzy from the feel and taste of him. She hadn’t realized that while he kissed her, she had moved her hips and was gripping his thigh between her own. Rubbing against him caused delightful pressure and she could feel every delicious muscle in his thigh, every ridge as he flexed, pushing against her. A saucy grin formed on that gorgeous mouth seconds before he rolled onto his back, positioning Ellie on top. She made a squeak of surprise and then shrunk down, trying to return to her back. Evander stopped her.
“Do not hide from me. By the gods, Ellie do you have any idea what you do to me? How beautiful you are? Sit up. Sit up. I want to watch you fall apart.”
She was shaking her head, not understanding how he could possibly be comfortable.
“I’m too heavy.”
But his response was to flex up and the sensation of feeling him hard under her stroked her hunger. Tentatively, his hand traveled up to cup her breast, his fingers brushing her nipple. Her head lobbed back, and she moaned.
“Gods, Ellie. Sit up. Use me. Take what you need from me.”
She moved with him as she sat back, a rhythm they were setting, in a position that she had avoided at all costs. He grabbed her thigh as she ground down, her hands found his chest, leaving half-moon indentations. She traced the Epsilon with her fingers causing gooseflesh to pebble along his pectoral.
“You like that? The feeling of me hard under you?”
She nodded and bit into her lip as she raced toward one hell of an orgasm. Her entire body was fire. She rotated her hips and Evander let out a guttural groan. He was breathing just as hard as she was, just as raspy. He seemed to enjoy the spectacle she was making, watching her get off. Finding the tip of him sent a spark through her and her head fell back. In a split second, she was on her back, his hand skimming from her breast to her hip.
“Will you let me touch you? Gods, I want to touch you.”
She nodded and Evander nipped her shoulder.
“I need to hear you say it.”
“Please, touch me.” Her words were breathy and desperate.
“Good girl.”
There it was again. An odd compliment for simply answering him. She didn’t understand how those two paltry words could cause her to lose what little of her faculties she had left. Reading it in romance books was one thing, hearing it excited and confused her. His hand slid between them, and Ellie forgot how to breathe.
“By the gods, you are so wet. I can feel you through the fabric.”
“Is—is that okay?” She hated how timid she sounded, but she was, more than she should be at her age. Years of being berated for having desires of her own made her self-conscious about sex, even if she wanted it.
He kissed her. “Fuck yes.”
She was swept up in the sea of desire that washed over her. Evander’s nimble fingers found her swollen clit and rubbed through her shorts. The friction was both delicious and too much. Ellie arched her back.
“That’s right. Enjoy. Let me please you.”
Ellie rubbed against him, aching for more, wanting his skin on hers, craving him inside her. He pressed harder, rubbing in slow circles, bringing her closer and closer to the edge. She grabbed his shoulders, he remained steady, his tempo never wavering. She fell. Arching her back, she gripped his hips, riding him to her orgasm. A cry tore from her as she bucked, and she slapped a hand over her mouth.
“Don’t. I want to hear you,” he begged.
His breathing was rapid, out of control against her neck, clutching her, rocking with her as she rode the wave, crying out again. Ellie licked the outer shell of his ear, and he nipped her neck as he ground against her.
Once.
Twice.
Once more, his breath caught. He moved involuntarily; his body jerked and shuddered as he clutched her, groaning into her collarbone. He lay there for a few moments, keeping his head buried in the crook of her neck. Her heartbeat was in her ears, her breath ragged as she melted into the mattress.
Evander kissed the hollow of her neck, her jaw, her cheek. Bringing his head back, he looked down on her with softness. His lips parted, his eyes hooded, glazed over. Ellie slid her hands on either side of his face. Bliss. She was sure this is what bliss felt like.
“You are exquisite.” Rolling onto his back, his one arm slung over his waist. “You are everything I’ve wanted, but I can’t have. I shouldn’t have done that.”
Her eyes widened in panic. Fear engulfed her, as if the oxygen was being sucked from the room. She knew it. She had made a complete ass of herself, and he was having second thoughts. She shouldn’t have kissed him. Should have moved back to her side of the bed. Before she could spiral further, he rolled into her, curling around her body as if protecting her from her own overthinking. Lazy, sweet kisses pressed into her cheek and neck.
“I should have controlled myself better. I was trying to focus on you, but watching you fall apart and shit, I lost control. But I’m not sorry,” he said into her hair. “I not sorry, Ellie. Do you hear me? Please tell me you’re okay. That I haven’t ruined everything.”
She struggled between her own insecurities and his words. Was he regretting what they just did, or was he worried she was? The first orgasm in years that wasn’t brought about by a battery-operated toy clouded her thoughts. She rolled, becoming the short little spoon to his massive one.
“I wanted this, Evander. You. I wanted—want—you.”
A groan rumbled from somewhere deep, and he wiggled even closer, effectively cocooning her inside his embrace. They both relaxed into each other, no other words needed. Evander smoothed her hair back and let out a half-laugh. He wrapped his arm around her to hold her close, placing a kiss on her crown.