Chapter 8 #2
“Yeah.” Her right arm comes around my waist. “Okay.”
“Okay!” Isabelle bounces on her toes, even in her matching pumps that are only a different color, and holds up the polaroid camera—Lana holding up a phone. “Smile!”
My smile comes easy to me with the only girl I’ve thought about by my side. The phone’s flash goes off and I look down at Natalia just in time to see a small, weak smile on her lips.
“Hey,” I whisper.
She turns her head up to me, batting her lashes. “What?”
“Just…” I smile and the flash of the polaroid goes off. “Hey.”
“Just hey?”
“Just hey,” I say again.
“Perfect,” I hear Isabelle exclaim. “Got it.”
But I hold onto her a little longer, taking advantage of the moment, and take in her face. I count her freckles, all seventeen of them, and connect the dots of the constellation.
The moment is stolen from me when Christian shouts, “Dinner!”
Natalia blinks and pulls back too quickly, and I’m forced to drop my arm. “I’m going to go set the table.”
I nod. “Yeah, of course.”
Her eyes avert from me just before she turns and strides away. With a sigh, feeling the lack of her, I go over to help with our food as everyone gathers at the dining table with the outdoor heaters we helped Christian install.
Julian and Nico come around for the rest of the appetizers and some of the pumpkin pies Natalia baked, and together, we fill the table with food.
“Next year, we’re going trick-or-treating,” Lana says as we sit.
“We’re in our late twenties,” Julian grumbles, reaching for a plate to fill, and most of the table chuckles.
“For a dad of a beautiful little ballerina,” Isabelle says, “you’re a party pooper.”
“Party pooper?” Gracie asks, looking up at her Auntie Isa.
“I’ll tell you later,” Isa tells her just before sending a glare Julian’s way. “Next year, we’re all going trick-or-treating with Grace.”
“Yes! Daddy, yes!”
“Fine,” Julian concedes. “We’ll all go trick-or-treating next year.”
“Yay!” Gracie claps her little hands and everyone smiles with her.
Finally, Julian cracks a smile at his little girl—the only one he has the softest spot for, aside from all of us, I think.
I hold the rib to my mouth to take a bite, and my eyes catch Natalia’s across the table, doing the same. I send her a wink and she rolls her beautiful eyes.
We eat our late Halloween dinner like this, with quick stolen glances in between the laughter and conversation.
It’s one o’clock in the morning by the time Isabelle and Lana are asleep on the couch, Julian left with Grace sleeping in his arms around eleven thirty, and Christian is cleaning the grill while the rest of us wipe down the tables and do the dishes.
I start bringing in dishes to clean and put in the dishwasher while Isabelle snores in the background. Lana groans, calling for Christian as Natalia struts in, looking like a true fairy as I dry off my hands. Their voices come in through the back door, but I don’t bother joining.
I follow behind Natalia down a tiny hall, scared she might pull an Irish goodbye. “Nat, wait.”
She slows and sighs, turning. “I’m fine,” she breathes. “I just have to pee.”
“Okay.” I nod. “I’m sorry.”
“Thank you. I’ll be right out.” She slides in and closes the door.
“Okay,” I murmur as the lock turns.
I shove my hands in the pockets of my blue pants and lean against the wall, my foot tapping at the pristine floors. I don’t think I can help this thing I’ve got for wanting to always help and protect her. Save her.
Natalia doesn’t need me. She doesn’t need a hero saving her because she isn’t a damsel in distress. But is it so bad that I want to be around for her. Let her fight her battles but be the one she calls for back-up?
I don’t want to be the overbearing dick of a man who acts like a bodyguard.
“Fuck,” I mutter and run my hands through my perfectly-styled hair, ruining the strands.
The bathroom door opens and she walks out, a questioning look in her eyes. “Rowan, what’s wrong?”
I huff. “Nothing.”
“If you don’t want me to lie to you,” she says, “then don’t lie to me. I hate liars.”
“You already hate me,” I muse.
“Yeah, and I’ll just add lying to my list of reasons why.”
I smirk. “What’s number one?”
“Your face.” She stifles a smile.
I chuckle, low and deep in my chest.
“So?”
I sigh and my eyes snap to hers. I feel them soften just as hers do the same, a silent conversation of words I can only comprehend even though I don’t know them. A different language that can only be translated in my mind as I look at her.
My eyes flick to her lips just as they part, a small heart taking the space between them. I bring my eyes back up to hers to find them stuck on my lips. She gasps quietly and sharply when she brings them back up.
“Rowan—”
“Fuck it,” I whisper as I push her up against the wall beside the bathroom door. And then my lips are on hers, pressed softly until her tongue darts out, tracing the seam to part my lips.
I groan against her mouth but she swallows the sound as she lets me in, my tongue fighting against hers.
She’s kissing me back—something I never imagined would happen in this lifetime.
Her fingers trace over my chest and abdomen, swirling and touching, making the muscles of my abs clench and go taut.
“R-Rowan.” She gasps as I press my hips into her. I’m unbelievably hard. Harder than I’ve ever been, I think. My hands are finally on her body, her hands are on mine, and it isn’t platonic, or for show.
“Is this okay?” I rasp.
“Yes,” she breathes with a whimper and my hips jerk forward, my cock grinding against her. “Yes. Oh god.”
“Natalia,” I purr, my lips taking a path down her neck—licking and sucking, nibbling and kissing at the sensitive skin until she’s gasping and moaning, her breath heavy and sporadic.
Her leg comes up around my hips and I bend to lift her with my hands at the backs of her thighs.
Natalia arches immediately, trying her best to roll her hips against mine.
When she can’t seem to find what she’s looking for, she whimpers in what sounds like pain.
I relieve both of our aches and press between her legs.
Fuck. Me.
If this wasn’t our friends’ house, I’m pretty sure I’d take her right here—kiss every inch of skin that I can reach and worship her, show her everything I’ve ever felt for her.
Her fingers delve into my hair, furthering the damage to the strands. She whimpers as she begins clawing at my shirt, my neck, everywhere her hands can reach. I don’t know why I waited so long. Why I never just told her what I felt for her.
God, I don’t just want to fuck her, I want to make love to her and hold her and kiss her and tell her she’s everything she thinks she’s not.
“Rowan,” she breathes between kisses. “Wait, wait.”
I pull back, giving us room to catch our breaths while we breathe each other in. But fuck, I wish I didn’t need to breathe just so I could keep kissing her and never stop—not for a thing.
Her lips are soft and perfect, and they fit with mine so masterfully, and all I can think is, I knew it! I knew kissing Natalia would feel like this—like fire and devotion. Like I’m giving myself to her even if it ruins me in the end.
Ruination.
I am a helpless man when it comes to her. So let her ruin me then.
“Kiss me again,” Natalia says.
And instead of the fast, devouring kisses, I savor her. My lips press to hers softly, and we move together fervently. I pour myself into her, slowing us down, letting her take everything I give. But, more than anything, I can feel everything she’s giving me back.
Or it’s just my mind tricking me into thinking she needs this more than she wants this—that she needs me like I need her.
“Rowan,” she mumbles on my lips.
I pull back to stare into her beautiful, soft face. Her lipstick has faded, lips are swollen, lids are heavy, and her eyes flick from my lips to my eyes with a silent pleas.
“Leave with me,” I whisper.
Natalia nods, biting her swollen lip. “Mhhm. Let’s go.”
I put my car in park and power off the engine—the ring of silence the only sound in the car now. Most of the drive was silent, enough to scare me into thinking that she was already regretting this.
I don’t know if I’ll regret this. Or if I’ll regret not doing this.
God, I want her. I need her the way I need oxygen.
“Natalia,” I whisper as I bring my eyes to the beautiful girl seated beside me.
“Yeah?”
“We don’t have to do this,” I say. “If you—”
“Do you want me, Rowan?” she asks, her eyes exuding a confidence and sensuality that I have never seen on her before. It’s as terrifying as it is stunning.
“Yes,” I rasp
“Then are you going to take me inside?” Natalia asks quietly, almost shy. Like she’s worried I might say no.
“Are you sure?”
Instead of replying with words, Natalia opens the door and slips out of the car. As she walks toward my front door, my eyes drink in the soft curves of her body. The flare of her hips, the narrow dip of her waist, the thickness of her thighs, her slender arms, the sway of her curls.
Fuck, I’m already hard. My hand wraps around the steering wheel as she reaches the front door and turns, leaning back against it.
My eyes nearly roll back when I see her there—her hands behind her back, her teeth in her lip, her big, round hazel eyes, the top swells of her breasts from her corset. Natalia bats her lashes in question and I release the wheel, my hand aching as I slip out of my car.
“I thought you were going to change your mind,” she purrs, her head tilting further back with each step I take.
“I would never change my mind about you,” I rasp, finally towering over her, close enough to hear her breath.
“Then kiss me,” she dares with her siren eyes.
My hand comes around her jaw and her back presses against the door as my lips crash into hers, our tongues at war, and the only thing I can think is:
Finally.