Chapter 68
CHAPTER SIXTY-EIGHT
Lily
Song- Iris, Tommee Profitt, Ruelle
The panic doesn’t disappear all at once. It loosens its grip slowly, like fingers uncurling one by one.
My breaths come easier, no longer sharp and tearing at my lungs. The shaking fades to a tremor, then melts into exhaustion so deep it feels like it’s stitched into my bones. I’m aware of warmth first.
Drago. Wrapped around me like he’s anchoring me to the world.
I don’t know how long we stay like that. Time stops making sense when you’ve been drowning, and someone finally pulls you back to the surface and refuses to let you sink again. He keeps murmuring to me. “I’ve got you.” He tells me as he helps me stand on weak legs.
The water clicks off. He lifts me without effort, wraps a towel around me before the cold can even think about touching my skin. I’m hazy. Drained. Embarrassment hums somewhere distant, waiting for its turn.
This is why I never let anyone in to see me like this. It’s humiliating. I can’t even take care of myself without falling to pieces. It’s always there, waiting to kill me from the inside. Like there's a threat waiting around every damn corner for me.
He sits me on the edge of the tub and dries me carefully, patiently, as if I might fracture if he rushes. There’s no discomfort in him. No hesitation. Just quiet certainty.
Then he reaches for another towel and drags it over his own head, scrubbing water from his hair, his face, his neck. His clothes are soaked through, clinging to him, and I watch through blurred vision as he peels them off without a word.
He pulls on soft grey sweats and a worn black T-shirt that he keeps in my drawer, then he helps me into clean clothes. His hands are warm and steady, even when mine aren’t. When I catch my reflection in the mirror, red eyes, blotchy skin, hair limp and tangled. I flinch.
“Hey,” he murmurs, stepping in close, tilting my chin up. “You’re beautiful, Lily. Look at me.”
I do. And somehow, that’s easier.
Once we’re in bed, he sits behind me and brushes my hair, slow strokes that smooth the knots and quiet my thoughts. I curl into him without thinking, my head tucked beneath his chin, his arm wrapping around me like it always belonged there.
And that’s when the shame creeps in. “Why are you doing this?” I whisper.
His hand stills in my hair, but he doesn’t pull away. “Doing what? Brushing your hair?”
“This.” My voice trembles. “Taking care of me. Seeing me like this.” My throat tightens. “I’m so broken, Drago. Today just—” I shake my head. “It’s humiliating. I don’t know why you stay. You deserve better than this. Better than me. I don’t know how to make this stop.”
The words spill out ugly and raw, soaked in years of believing I’m too much when I hurt.
He shifts, rolling slightly so I’m forced to face him. There’s no pity in his eyes. No doubt. No hesitation.
Only certainty. “Because I love you, Lily.” The words don’t land softly. They hit like truth finally spoken out loud.
“Not just the easy parts,” he continues, his voice rough. “Not the days when you smile and pretend you’re fine. All of you.” His hands slide to my back.
I try to shake my head, but he doesn’t let me.
“No,” he murmurs, pressing his forehead to mine. “You don’t get to tell me you’re broken like it’s a reason I should walk away. You don’t get to decide you’re too much or not enough or unworthy of being loved.”
His thumb brushes under my eye.
“You are not something I endure,” he says quietly. “You are the person I choose. Every single day and will continue to until the day I die.”
My breath stutters.
“I’ve lived my whole life in darkness,” he goes on, like a confession. “Violence. Blood. Secrets. Things I can’t undo. I carry that. But you—” His breath shakes. “You are the light I never thought I deserved. The reason I want a future that isn’t just surviving.”
The second I see tears fall from his eyes, I start to feel his hurt. Which makes me want to fight, not just to help myself, but for him.
“When you hurt, I hurt. When you fall apart, I’m right there on the floor with you. Not because I have to. Because I want to. Loving you means standing in the worst moments and choosing you, choosing us, no matter what.” He cups my face.
“I am not scared of your pain. I am not embarrassed by your scars. I am not looking for someone easier or quieter or less real. I want you. I love you, Lily. I love you more than I ever imagined it was possible to love another person.”
His voice breaks.
“I will never let go of you. Not on the good days. Not on days like today. Not when the past claws its way back. You don’t have to be strong alone anymore. You don’t have to earn my love.”
His forehead presses to mine.
“You already have it.”
I break then. Not apart. Open.
I curl into him, clutching his shirt, sobbing into his chest, and he wraps around me completely, as if there is nowhere else he would ever rather be.
“I’ve got you,” he whispers into my hair. “For the rest of my life.”