Chapter 12 #2
“If you go,” Papa said, taking my hand in his, “don’t go for me or Bennett Studios.
Go for yourself. Go because you were drawn to San Francisco and the gold rush and if you don’t see it through, you’ll always wonder.
I will find a way out of my own mess, because despite what I feel, I know deep inside that God hears me and sees me.
He will not leave us or forsake us. I don’t need you to find gold to save our company. If you want to go, do it for yourself.”
“I still don’t like it.” Mama crossed her arms. “And I’ll be worried about you the whole time you’re there.”
“You’ll still see me here every day, even if I go to the Yuba River in 1849.”
“That won’t stop me from worrying. What happens to you in 1849 affects who you are in 1929, and vice versa.
If you’re hurt or, God forbid, attacked, that will have mental and emotional ramifications on both of your lives.
I still carry scars from my life in the 1600s.
Because, despite what I always tell you, to keep your two lives separate is almost impossible. ”
I was well aware. Thoughts of Sam seemed to follow me no matter which path I was in.
The hall clock struck half past eight. Spencer was now thirty minutes late.
“Be careful and wise, Ally,” Mama said. “That’s all I ask.”
I nodded, but I couldn’t make any promises. In either path.
“Sorry I was late,” Spencer said twenty minutes later as we drove west on Olympic Boulevard.
I waited for him to give me an excuse, but he offered none.
“If this was a real date,” I said, watching the buildings pass, “I might be upset. But since this is a business meeting, in a sense, I guess I can’t complain.”
“That’s why I like you so much, Ally. You’re a no-nonsense kind of girl.”
“You like me?” I teased.
He grinned. “I thought you knew that.”
“I always take everything you say with a grain of salt. I’m not sure if you say those things because you think it’s what I want to hear or because you really mean them.”
“With most girls, I usually say them because I think it’s what they want to hear.” His voice turned serious. “But with you, I really mean them.”
I shook my head and sighed. “See, there you go again. It’s even harder for me because you’re contractually obligated to be nice.”
“I’m contractually obligated to spend time with you—I never agreed to be nice. That’s just a perk.” He laughed, and even though it was now dark, he let his gaze linger on me before looking back at the road. “You look really pretty tonight.”
“Thank you. You told me to dress nice. Can you tell me where we’re going now?”
“You always look pretty.”
“Either you’re trying to change the subject, or you want to butter me up because I won’t like where you’re taking me.”
“Can’t I compliment you without an ulterior motive?”
“You can, I’m just not sure if you do.”
“That’s unfortunate. How can I get you to believe my intentions are honorable and real?”
“I don’t think you can,” I said, still teasing.
Spencer became quiet as he watched the road.
He was in a tuxedo, his hair styled in a pompadour. He looked dashing and handsome tonight—a dangerous combination to my confused heart.
“Will you tell me where we’re going, please?”
“You’ll know when we get there.”
“You’re starting to worry me, Spencer.”
“Try to relax and live in the moment, Ally. You’re much too uptight.”
I lifted my eyebrows. “I thought you liked me just how I am.”
“Everyone has room for improvement.”
Laughing, I shook my head. “Fine. I’ll try to be patient. Do we have much farther to go?”
“About fifteen minutes.” He motioned to the glove compartment. “You can entertain yourself by looking at my mother’s last letter. Or I could paraphrase it for you.”
“Is it good news?”
“She was very happy to read about us in Photoplay. She thinks I’m turning a new leaf.”
“Are you?”
His brown eyes were serious as he regarded me. “Am I?”
It was hard to know when to take him seriously and when to assume he was teasing.
We chatted about filming as we drove down Olympic Boulevard, through Beverly Hills, and continued toward the ocean.
I didn’t let on that Mama and Papa were having financial trouble—at least, more than before.
I was still mulling over how or if I could help them.
Going to the goldfields and placing a substantial amount of gold in a safety-deposit box was probably a foolish idea, but I couldn’t sit back and do nothing.
If I could help my parents from both paths at the same time, why wouldn’t I at least try?
A large billboard on Olympic Boulevard made me sit up straight, my mouth slipping open. “Spencer!”
“What?” He looked all around to see what had made me react with shock.
“Look.” I pointed to the billboard.
He chuckled. “What? I’ve seen you on a billboard before. Why are you so surprised to see me on one?”
“But—the movie they’re advertising.”
“Gold Rush! I know it’s a little old, but what about it?”
“I thought you weren’t in Gold Rush!”
He gave me a funny look. “I was nominated for a best actor award for it. Are you feeling okay?”
I shook my head, confused and uncertain. “I’m suddenly not feeling well,” I admitted. “What was the movie about?”
“I thought you said you saw it.”
“I forgot.”
He frowned, but said, “It’s about a man named Cole Goodman who comes to California in ’49.
He’s disillusioned by the debauchery in San Francisco, and gives into it for a while, but then he falls in love with a woman who encourages him to look for his treasure in the dream he’s had since he was a kid.
After she dies unexpectedly in her sleep, he realizes life is too short, and he heads off to Sacramento and writes his book.
It was a bestseller back East and is considered one of the finest books about the California Gold Rush to this day. ”
“What was her name? The woman he loved?”
“Bess Kendal.”
“Was she married?”
Spencer studied me for a minute, but said, “Yeah, before she went to San Francisco. It was a bad marriage, and it didn’t end well. The wisdom she had to share with Cole was from her own experiences.”
I was almost afraid to ask. “What about the man she lived with?”
Spencer frowned. “She didn’t live with anyone. She started a hotel and restaurant with her son. It was quite the success story. That also inspired Cole. Say, what’s this all about, Ally? You’re worrying me.”
I wasn’t sure what to tell him. Had Cole really listened to me and left Jim behind to write his book? It was the only explanation. I’d somehow changed history back in a way, though not knowingly. But that didn’t mean I would forfeit 1849—at least, I hoped I wouldn’t. I’d only given Cole advice.
“I can’t really explain it,” I told Spencer. “I’ve just been interested in San Francisco history for a long time, and I was curious.”
“I remember that big book you borrowed from the library a few weeks ago.”
I nodded, still trying to recover from my shock.
“Goodman wrote ten books in total,” Spencer said.
“The other nine were books of fiction set in the Wild West. I read them all when I was preparing to play him. He was a talented writer.” He smiled.
“One of the heroines in West Over the Rockies was named Ally.” He squinted for a second. “Ally Adams, I think.”
Cole had named a character after me?
“What was it about?”
“A typical wagon train story about a young couple who left their life in the East behind to start over in Oregon. Ally was widowed on the way, and she had a baby to care for, so she married the wagon train master for protection.” He shrugged. “It wasn’t his best book, but it was entertaining.”
I was silent for a long time as I thought about Cole Goodman and how one conversation could have possibly impacted a great deal of history.
I was happy he’d done something with his life but afraid I wouldn’t wake up in 1849 in the morning.
I had to keep reminding myself I hadn’t knowingly changed anything.
“You okay?” Spencer asked after a few minutes. “You got quiet.”
I nodded. “I’m just thinking.” I finally noticed our surroundings and forced myself to focus. “Are we going to Santa Monica?”
“You guessed it.”
“Dancing?”
The La Monica Ballroom had recently opened on the Santa Monica Pier and claimed to be the largest ballroom on the West Coast, accommodating up to five thousand dancers.
The pier also had a roller coaster, among other thrill rides, and a carousel I’d ridden many times as a child, but I didn’t think Spencer would ask me to dress up for an amusement park.
“We might end up dancing,” he said evasively.
“So, we’re not going to the pier?”
“We’re going to the pier.”
“Herbert Spencer Leeds!” I put my hand on his forearm. “Tell me what we’re doing.”
“We’re going to have fun, Ally.” He put his hand over mine. “That’s all that matters. Trust me.”
When we approached the pier, it was an impressive sight, lit up with hundreds of lights. The roller coaster dipped and rose against the starry night sky, and the flags on the Spanish-influenced towers of the La Monica Ballroom waved in the breeze.
“What else can we do on the pier besides dance?” I asked as he drove down the length of it and parked at the end.
“You’ll see.” He turned off the car and got out, coming around to open the passenger door for me. “Take your wrap. It might get chilly.”
I had brought a silk wrap with a thick fur collar and pulled it on a little tighter as I frowned. “It’s pretty warm.”
“It won’t be on the water.”
“The water?”
He closed the car door and took my hand, wrapping his fingers around mine as he tugged me to follow him.
There was a large red X painted on the side of a building with a single light flickering overhead.
Several people had already gathered there.
They were dressed in tuxedos and evening gowns, laughing and chatting as they waited.
“What’s happening?” I pulled him to a stop, all teasing gone. “I’m serious. Where are we going?”
He grinned and stepped closer, his eyes filled with pleasure. “We’re going to the S. S. Tango. It’s anchored offshore a bit.”
He was so close, I could smell the cologne he wore and feel the heat from his body. It made my pulse thrum.
I needed to stay focused and not let my attraction to him get the best of me. “What kind of ship is the S. S. Tango, and why is it anchored offshore?”
“It’s a gambling ship, if you must know.
” He moved aside a tendril of hair that blew across my face, his finger brushing my cheek and leaving a trail of fire behind.
“It’s anchored about three miles offshore because it’s out of Los Angeles’s jurisdiction there.
It’s a respectable establishment.” He tilted his head toward the crowd, his fingers tightening around mine.
“You probably know a lot of those people over there.”
“I don’t want to go to a gambling ship. I have no desire to gamble.”
“We’re not going to gamble.” He put his free hand on my arm, grasping it gently.
“What are we going for?” It was hard to talk with him standing so close, touching my hand and arm.
“We’re going to socialize.” His hand moved up my arm to my shoulder.
“And be seen by the right people, so they start to believe the rumors. But”—his hand lifted to my cheek, and I met his gaze—“more than that, we’re going out there to get away from everything for a couple hours and spend time together. ”
My breath stilled at the feel of his hand on my face again. “Couldn’t we do that somewhere legal?”
He smiled. “The gambling boats aren’t illegal in international waters.”
“That’s a technicality.”
“Technicalities are all that matter. Is something wrong just because someone in power says it’s so? Who gets to decide if something is right or wrong?”
“God.”
His thumb grazed my cheek just as Sam’s had, but Spencer wasn’t comforting me or trying to protect me. He was enticing me. Perhaps even seducing me. “I said we weren’t going to gamble.”
A ferry appeared in the distance, and the crowd on the pier began to shuffle with excitement.
I pulled away from Spencer’s hand, knowing that I risked his irritation and ridicule. “I don’t want to go to the gambling boat.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want to gamble, and I don’t want to drink. I can’t think of any other reason to go out there.”
“You sound like a prude.”
“I sound like someone who cares about my family and my career. I like to enjoy myself, but I don’t have to go places like this to do it.
” I pulled back farther, disentangling my hand from his.
“I’m sorry, Spencer. I wish you had told me sooner, and we could have saved some time.
But I don’t want to go out there. I know who runs those boats, the same men I saw you talking to outside Sardi’s the other day.
” The wind pulled at my wrap and played with the curls near my cheeks.
“I don’t know why you associate with those people, but the idea behind our arrangement was that I would improve your reputation, not that you would tarnish mine. ”
He stood on the dark pier, watching me, his gaze hard to read.
“I wish you trusted me, Ally.” It was the first thing that sounded like the truth out of Spencer Hayes.
“You haven’t given me any reason to trust you.”
“I’m supposed to be on that boat tonight.” His voice was calm. Steady. Serious.
“I imagine you are.”
“But not for the reasons you think.” He took a step closer and lowered his voice. “I’m supposed to meet with some men there tonight. I can’t tell you why, but I need you to trust me. Please. You’re doing me a favor.”
I stared at him for a long time, trying to decipher if he was being honest or leading me on again.
“I care about you too much to lie,” he continued. “But if I’m not on that boat, I will face serious consequences.”
“Is it dangerous?”
“Going on the boat? A little. But I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.”
“How can you promise something like that?”
“Look.” He turned and pointed. “I see Clark Gable right now—and Lana Turner. You know these people. It will be okay.”
I sighed. “Am I a fool for trusting you, Spencer?”
A smile tilted his lips. “Maybe a little.”
I shook my head. “Fine. I’ll go—but if I have any reason to regret this, I will never trust you again.”
He grabbed my hand like a kid who was told he could have a spending spree in a candy shop and led me to the crowd. When we came to a stop, he leaned forward and placed a kiss on my cheek, whispering in my ear, “You won’t regret this. I promise. Your trust is my highest aim.”
I already did regret this.
But only because his kiss kindled a fire inside me that made me afraid.