Chapter 21 #2
She jumped into my embrace and wrapped her arms around my neck, speaking quickly.
“I missed you so much, but we had a lot of fun while you were away. Father has taught me how to multiply, and he read The Count of Monte Cristo to me and Johnnie, and we made swords out of sticks, and I’ve learned to fence.
We went on a treasure hunt, like the count, and we went to church, and Mrs. Green is ever so nice.
She says I must treat her like a grandmother.
She and Reverend Green are helping Father start a school, and Johnnie has learned how to write his name.
” She continued to ramble as Father joined us in the front room.
He looked like a new man. His color had returned, and he walked toward us without any trouble. There was no sign of exhaustion or illness, though he was still thin and looked older than when we had left Massachusetts.
“What is this about a school?” I asked him, setting Hazel on the ground, thrilled that he appeared to have regained his health.
“There is much to tell you, daughter,” Father said as he glanced from me to Sam, displeasure on his face. “And I’m sure you have much to tell me.”
I frowned at his cool greeting, but I nodded. “We do have much to say. But where is Johnnie?”
“He and Paddy are making kindling out back.”
“Where are the workers I hired to complete the hotel?” Sam asked, the scar in his eyebrow bent with a frown. “I expected things to be finished when I returned.”
“Much has happened for both of us.” Father crossed his arms and looked between us. “Is there something you’d like to tell me?”
I glanced at Sam and then at Father, unable to hide my excitement despite his strange behavior.
“We have had success finding gold. A lot of gold.” I planned to keep half of it for Father and Hazel and put the other half in a safe deposit box for my parents in 1929. “Sixty-five thousand dollars, Father.”
His white eyebrows came up in surprise. “That’s a lot of money, Ally.”
“And if we invest it wisely, it could mean everything for you and Hazel.”
“For you, as well.”
“Of course.” I almost forgot that he didn’t know I might not be here in four weeks.
“But that is not what is on my mind.” He nodded at Hazel. “Run on outside and help Johnnie and Paddy. I need to speak to Ally and Mr. Kendal in private.”
Hazel frowned, but she knew better than to disobey and was soon gone.
Father turned to us again, displeasure in his face. “A man named Mr. Dixon came up the hill a week ago. Word spread quickly that he encountered Sam Kendal on the trail and he had a woman with him. A woman who fit your description, Ally.”
My cheeks warmed at the disapproval in his voice—and how Sam might interpret it.
“You said that no one would know who you were,” Father told me.
“That no one would care. But you were wrong. It’s all anyone in Portsmouth Square has been talking about this past week.
Before Mr. Dixon’s arrival, the Reverend Mr. Green and I had started to work on plans for our school.
I was telling everyone that you would be a teacher there.
But since Mr. Dixon’s arrival, we haven’t raised a single dollar.
” He looked at Sam now. “You might not care in Sydney Town, but up here, your business will live and die on your reputation, young man. People already think the worst of you, and now they think the same of Ally.”
Sam inhaled a breath as my father’s words hit their mark.
I had been so worried about my reputation in 1929 with Spencer. Why hadn’t I been as concerned about how my reputation might look in 1849 with Sam?
“To quell the rumors, I had to tell people you were married,” Father continued.
“Father!”
“I wasn’t just thinking of you and Sam. You have Hazel to consider, Ally.”
I was speechless. I hadn’t anticipated causing a scandal, especially with all the other lawlessness and immoral activities rampant in San Francisco.
“The businessmen are already looking for reasons to send you back to Sydney Town,” Father said to Sam. “You can’t give their wives fuel for the fire.”
Sam’s jaw was tight as he listened to Father, but he said nothing.
“What will you do, Mr. Kendal?” Father asked. “Will you marry Ally to protect her reputation and her sister’s?”
I shook my head in protest. “Sam shouldn’t have to marry me because—”
Sam put his hand on my arm. “I would not have to be forced or coerced, Ally.”
“But—” I swallowed the nerves. “I cannot ask you—”
“I think a visit to Reverend Green is the best course of action.” Father nodded. “If Sam is going to open a respectable establishment here on the hill, he needs a respectable name. And if we’re going to open a school, so do you, Ally.”
I shook my head. “I don’t think—”
“You created this problem,” Father said. “And though it’s not what I had hoped, this is where we find ourselves.”
“This is absurd. I cannot marry Sam.”
Even as the words slipped out of my mouth, I knew I’d misspoken. The look on Sam’s face pierced my heart. I’d come to know him and his mannerisms on the trail. He hid his feelings well, but his eyes never lied. When he lowered his hand and stepped back, my pulse escalated.
“I’m sorry,” I said, reaching for him. “That’s not what I meant. You know why I can’t marry you.”
Father’s gaze landed on my hand and my familiarity with Sam. He shook his head.
Sam nodded, but then he let out a breath as he looked at Father. “I would marry Ally this very day if she agreed, but I’d rather lose everything than force her into a marriage she doesn’t want.” He swallowed his emotions. “Excuse me. I need to speak to Paddy and let Johnnie know I’ve returned.”
He left the front hall without another word.
When I turned back to Father, all I saw was his disappointment.
I’d hurt two of the most important men in my life, and it crushed me.
The kitchen in the San Francisco Hotel was crude at best. There was a cookstove and a board over two sawhorses that served as a worktable and dining table. It wasn’t much, but it had been enough for Father to prepare their meals while we were gone.
He went to the stove and stirred whatever was in the pot as I followed.
His movements were choppy and filled with displeasure.
I wanted to tell him that in 1929 women didn’t need chaperones and were given more freedom to spend time alone with men.
There were still reputations to worry about, but people were less concerned about men and women being alone together.
But he didn’t know I lived in 1929, and even if he did, he wouldn’t care. All he was worried about was 1849.
“You might not care about your own reputation,” Father said, apparently not ready to change the subject, “but what about Hazel’s?
By the time she is old enough to marry, this wild and unruly city will be civilized, and it will matter what people think of her.
What you do today will greatly impact her options. ”
Guilt and shame pushed down on me because I knew he was speaking the truth.
It was easy for me to be flippant and unconcerned about people’s good opinions in 1849 because I didn’t really know anyone here.
I should be just as concerned as I was in 1929 about my reputation and how it would impact my family.
I didn’t want to do anything that would hurt Hazel’s prospects.
The truth was, if I died here in four weeks to stay in 1929, my actions would cast a shadow over her life.
Sam’s voice filtered into the kitchen from the backyard, and my heart ached. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him. I loved him, and if I didn’t have 1929—or know that we couldn’t have a life together because of the fire—I wouldn’t hesitate.
“I will talk to Sam,” I said.
“It’s not what I wanted for you, Ally.” He sighed and walked away from the stove, putting his hands on my shoulders. “But despite what people say about Sam, he has shown us that he is kind and trustworthy.”
“He is more than that.” I couldn’t hide the affection from my voice. “He is sacrificial and thoughtful, and he is a man of faith. He will not accept a single piece of gold, either. He wants us to have it all.”
“He went all that way with you, missing three weeks of profit from his hotel, and he isn’t asking for any of it?” Father frowned as he lowered his hands.
“You told me not to fall in love with him just because he was the only man I knew in San Francisco.” I pressed my lips together as emotion flooded my soul.
“But I’ve come to realize that even if I knew all the eligible men in San Francisco, both now and in the future, I would choose Sam over and over. ”
Father studied me, joy and sadness mingling in his frown. “Then why would you hesitate to marry him?”
“Because—” I paused, unable to tell him the truth.
“He seems to truly care for you, Ally. I’ve known it for a long time.” He nodded at the back door. “Go talk to him.”
I wasn’t sure what I would say, but I owed Sam an explanation.
Without another word, I left Father in the kitchen and stepped out the back door to the yard, where Paddy was standing with Sam.
Johnnie was in Sam’s arms, hugging his neck close like Hazel had done to me, as Paddy struggled to get out a few words.
Hazel sat on a log, playing with a piece of kindling like it was a doll.
The sun had set, and the sky was muted with soft pinks and oranges, playing with the handsome lines of Sam’s face.
“E-Engli-shhhh J-J-Jim,” Paddy said with great effort, clearly distressed as he pointed to the hotel. “Th-threat-threatened.”
“English Jim threatened my workers?”
Paddy nodded with relief.
“Is that why they left and didn’t return?” Sam asked.
Again, Paddy nodded. “A-f-fraid.”
When Johnnie saw me, his face lit up with joy, and he wiggled out of Sam’s arms.
Sam set him on the ground with a frown as Johnnie ran toward me, his arms spread out for a hug.
Tears burned my eyes as I bent down and received his hug.
Sam’s face was hard to read as I met his gaze.