12. Nolan
12
NOLAN
I hadn’t planned to run into her. I just needed to get some of the winter weather gear so we could start blowing a path through the snow to the garage. I knew Lilah felt unsafe in the house with us, and who could blame her? She was like a wounded animal, ready to lash out at any threat.
I got the feeling it wasn’t all bravado either. Lilah Abbott had changed in the years since high school. She was still short, but she was more muscular now, more solid, and there was a fire in her eyes that burned bright as a warning: come close, get burned .
I knew that fire. I’d seen it in Rafe. I just hadn’t expected it from Lilah.
Not that I’d expected to ever run into her again. I’d assumed she’d left Blackwell Falls after she finished being home schooled, and since I made an effort to avoid everyone from town, it was an assumption that had stood until last night, when she’d fallen through the door covered in snow.
This was all the stuff I was thinking when I rounded the corner and almost ran her down outside of sauna.
“Ow! What the…”
I was surprised by the force of her shove. Grabbing her shoulders was instinctual, an effort to keep my own balance as much as one to keep her on her feet.
“Fuck, sorry,” I said, looking down at her.
We both froze. We were about as close as two people could be without touching. Heat emanated from her body and seeped through my sweats. Her dark blond hair was damp, moisture beading on her skin. I had to force myself not to reach out, wipe it off her mouth with my thumb, bend my head to taste it.
Fuck.
Then she shoved me again, and this time I stumbled backward.
She was clutching a towel in one hand, her eyes lit with fury. “What the fuck are you doing?”
“Nothing,” I said, recovering my balance. Figuratively and literally. “You took me by surprise, that’s all.”
“ You took me by surprise.” She glared at me accusingly. “Jude said nobody would bother me down here.”
I held up my hands in a gesture of surrender. “I’m sorry. I need to get some gear to clear the walkway out front. I thought you’d still be in the sauna.”
But she wasn’t. She was standing right in front of me, the white tank top Jude had given her plastered to her damp body, her full tits clearly visible through the transparent fabric.
And the boxers didn’t help. If you’d asked me whether I found men’s boxers sexy on a girl before now, I probably would have said no, but no point lying to myself now: she looked sexy as fuck.
I’d seen Lilah naked before — obviously — but that had been ages ago. I’d been a dickhead, on one of Rafe’s missions, and even though her body was burned into my memory, this was not the body of Lilah Abbott, high school sophomore.
Now her legs were thick in the best way possible, strong and powerful, and I had to tear my eyes away from the patch shadowed between her thighs. My dick stirred in my jeans and I tried to will away my incoming hard-on.
I was relieved when she covered her glorious tits, not because I didn’t want to look at them but because the longer I stared the more worried I was that looking wouldn’t be enough. It was too easy to imagine sucking her taut nipples into my mouth, wedging my body between her pillowy thighs.
It felt wrong to want to fuck Lilah after what we’d done to her, but my dick wasn’t exactly standing on principle.
I backed away from her as she hurriedly wrapped the towel around her body. Her cheeks were pink but I didn’t know if it was residual heat from the sauna or embarrassment.
“I’m sorry,” I said again. “I didn’t want to interrupt you. I’ll just grab the gear and you can stay down here as long as you want.”
“It’s fine,” she said, angrily tucking the end of the towel in to hold it in place. “I’m done.”
I nodded, feeling bad that I’d spooked her. “How are you feeling? Did the sauna help?”
She stood straighter, like she had something to prove. “I’m fine.”
“I’d like to listen to your heart later, if that’s okay.”
She nodded but she didn’t look happy about it. “How long will it be before the roads are open?”
“Rafe tapped into the town radio band.” We kept a shortwave in the house for emergencies. “Sounds like they’ll be clear sometime tonight.”
“Good,” she said. “Do you need help?”
“Help?”
“Clearing the walkway out front?”
She looked at me like I was an idiot, which… fair. I guess I was still off-balance after all, which wasn’t like me. Being a medic meant keeping a cool head under pressure. It meant assessing the most traumatic injuries imaginable under the worst possible conditions: under fire, in a Humvee bouncing over rough terrain, in the middle of nowhere with sparse supplies.
So why did I feel like I couldn’t think straight?
“No way,” I said. “You need to rest and stay warm.”
She lifted her chin. “I’m not fragile.”
I believed her, even though right then, I wanted to wrap her up and protect her from the world. “I know.”
Our gazes held and for a long moment I felt like the world stopped spinning, like the universe was holding its breath.
She gestured toward the hall leading to the stairs. “I’m going to get dressed so I’ll be ready to go when the roads are cleared.”
“Right,” I said, taking a step back so she could pass. She was halfway down the hall when I remembered something. “Lilah?”
She looked over her shoulder, and I suddenly wished I was artistic like Jude so I could capture the image: a still-damp Lilah looking back at me over her shoulder, moisture beading on her skin, her full lips parted. “Yeah?”
“Jude found a charger for your phone.”
She nodded. “Thanks.”
I watched her full hips sway under the towel with a mixture of lust and regret I didn’t want to untangle.
It didn’t matter. She’d be gone soon.
And that was for the best.