Chapter 13 Aspen
Aspen
Not again…
If Presley changed his name to Casper, he could not look any whiter. Added to his pale complexion was a sheen of sweat coating his entire face and curling the hair at his nape. Plus, his hands were shaking.
“I can’t do this. Not with that many people.
What if I freeze? What if I forget the words?
” He glanced around the cramped dressing room provided by the management of The Crimson Vault as though seeking an exit—a way of avoiding what was to come.
It reminded me of when I took my finals in college.
That dread in the pit of your stomach in recognition of the rollercoaster ride you couldn’t get off, no matter how much you wanted to.
Growing pains were the pits.
I was ready with my pep talk when Joz moved in front of me. He clasped Presley by the shoulders and looked him square in the eye.
“Hey, buddy, listen to me. Let’s get this out of the way right now. You’re gonna screw up. Maybe not tonight, but it’ll happen at some point. We all do. It’s part of the job.”
Presley’s startled gaze flickered to me before returning to Joz. “Wait. That’s supposed to make me feel better?”
Joz grinned and gave him a friendly shake. “Yeah. Because the trick isn’t expecting perfection. It’s learning how to keep playing when your guitar’s out of tune, your mic cuts out, and your heart’s trying to claw its way out of your throat.”
“That sounds… fucking awful.”
“First time it happens, yeah, it sucks. Then it’s electric.
You don’t need to be perfect out there, you just need to be real.
The audience will feel that more than anything.
Be yourself, kid. You’ve got an incredible voice, a voice the world deserves to hear.
Now, deep breath, and get ready for the mindfuck of your life. ”
“But… what if I mess up the first line?”
“Then you laugh and say, ‘let’s try that again.’ Trust me, you’ll win the hearts of every single person in the place if you do that. People don’t fall in love with flawless. They fall in love with honest. So, get out there, be honest, and wow those fuckers.”
I listened to the entire exchange in awe. I had my platitudes ready. This wouldn’t have been the first time I’d had to calm down a performer before going on stage. But the way Joz did it with such blinding sincerity had me completely up in my feels.
He’d make a great dad.
I blinked. Hold up. I had no business thinking of Joz in that way. He was a rock star. None of them made great dads. Or husbands. Or boyfriends for that matter. They were married to their music and their fanbase. There wasn’t room for anything else in their lives.
“Okay.” Presley’s voice broke through my thoughts, and I returned my attention to my newest signing. He stood up straighter. “Okay, I think I can do this.”
“Fuck think. You can do this. You’re gonna kill it.” Joz gave him another friendly shake that he followed up with a clap on the back. “They are gonna fucking love you, man. Guaranteed.”
Joz handed Presley his guitar, and the two of them left the dressing room before making their way along the narrow hallway to the stage. I took a few steadying breaths, severed my wayward thoughts, and followed them. Presley peeked through the curtains, then turned to me with a grimace.
“It’s full.”
I nodded. “Sold out. Five hundred people here to listen to you because you are a fucking star in waiting. You hear me? This is your moment, Presley. Your dreams start coming true right here, tonight. After this, nothing will be the same again. Are you ready?”
He ran a hand through his inky hair, then slipped his guitar strap over his head. “I’m ready.”
“Your audience is waiting. Go give them a new obsession to follow.”
I pulled back the curtain, making sure I stood to the side so the focus would all be on Presley.
Applause broke out, giving him a few precious seconds to gather himself.
We’d decided on an acoustic set for this evening.
Just him and his guitar. His voice was so powerful, I hadn’t wanted to detract from it with a full band.
Joz stood behind me, and as Presley began to sing, he clasped my hips and rested his chin on the top of my head. “Is this okay?”
I swallowed. Damn, that felt good. No, better than good. It felt right. “Sure.”
I might have sounded casual, but my insides were liquid fire, and my clit pulsed to the beat of the music and the steady thud of Joz’s heart as he pulled me closer.
“You found a real star, Joz.”
“Yeah. If he doesn’t fuck up, he’ll eclipse me one day.”
I glanced back at him. “What do you mean, fuck up?”
“You know this business, Aspen. There are so many landmines that take talent out of the game: drugs, alcohol, toxic relationships, depression, self-harm. The list goes on and on. Not to mention the trappings of fame going to his head and turning him into an arsehole.”
“How many of those did you fall victim to?”
He slowly turned me in his arms, returning his hands to my hips. “All of them.”
“Including the asshole?”
“Definitely the arsehole. Fame’s a drug in itself, and it’s powerful.
It can take hold in a heartbeat. I remember after my first single released and it went straight to number one.
I was on this TV show, and I thought I was fucking God.
I remember demanding all kinds of shit and throwing my weight around.
I think back now and I cringe at my behavior, but I was young and finding out who I was.
But, yeah, I wrestled with every one of those to some extent. ”
It shouldn’t have surprised me. He’d already admitted a problem with alcohol, but he didn’t seem at all the depressive type. Then again, what was a depressive type? Weren’t we all capable of hiding our darkest thoughts behind a bright smile and an offhand quip?
“I’m a catch, Aspen.” Proving my point, he flashed a brilliant smile. “You don’t want to miss out on the best you’ve ever had.”
“Good God. You are so modest.”
He nodded sagely. “I know.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, and the seriousness of the moment gave way to frivolity. I turned back around as Presley began singing a haunting song about love and loss—a song that showcased his incredible voice. He truly was a find. No wonder Joz had fought hard to win him a contract.
“We’ll have to keep an eye on Presley, then. I can’t have a new signing careering off the rails.”
“We’ll both do our best to keep him on the right path, but ultimately, it’s up to him. When the adulation kicks in, he needs to decide what kind of person he wants to be.”
We fell into silence, enjoying Presley’s set. He ended to rapturous applause, and as he came off stage, I could almost see the adrenaline coursing through his veins and a new-found confidence that hadn’t been there before.
“God, that was amazing.” He flung his arms around me, then Joz. “Thank you. Thank you for believing in me.”
“It’s just the start for you, kid.” Joz ruffled his hair. “Before long, you’ll be snapping at my heels.”
“Nah. You’ll always be number one.”
“Nothing lasts forever.” I thought I caught a moment of melancholy in his voice, but before I could latch onto it, he carried on. “Can’t think of anyone I’d rather overtake me than you. I knew the moment I saw you singing online that I’d discovered a fucking diamond in the rough.”
A couple in their mid-to-late forties appeared, along with a teenager who looked far too much like Presley not to be related. His parents and younger brother.
“Oh, son.” The woman dashed forward, throwing her arms around Presley’s neck. “We’re so proud of you. So proud.”
“We are.” His dad came forward and shook his hand. “You were wonderful out there. You had them in the palm of your hand.”
Presley reached for his younger brother. They hugged briefly, then broke apart. “What did you think, Brax?”
“Couldn’t believe it was you up there. You did good, bruv.” He glanced down; a typical awkward teenager still discovering his place in the world.
“This is my boss, Ms. Kingcaid, and this is my friend Joz.”
“Aspen, please. Thank you for coming. I know it meant a lot to Presley for you to be here.”
“Thank you for arranging the travel and accommodation.” His father avoided my eyes.
A proud man who hadn’t enjoyed taking what he’d told me in no uncertain terms was a loan when I’d called and offered to fly them here for Presley’s first concert for Kingcaid Music.
“We will pay you back as soon as possible.”
“I’ll take care of that, Dad.” Presley almost puffed up with pride. “You’ve spent your lives taking care of me. Now it’s my turn. It can come out of my earnings.”
His dad muttered something. I didn’t catch it, but whatever it was caused his mom’s eyes to shimmer with unshed tears.
She met my gaze and tentatively smiled. “We’re going out for dinner. Would you like to join us?”
“Unfortunately, we have plans,” Joz said. “But thank you.”
Did we? I wasn’t aware of any plans. Not that I’d have intruded on this special family moment, regardless. Relaxing while the boss and one of the biggest stars in the world were sitting across the table wouldn’t be easy. Presley deserved to let his hair down and enjoy this moment with his family.
“Another time.” I shook hands with both his parents. “You did great, Presley. Now, go enjoy your evening. You’ve earned it.”
The four of them disappeared into the hallway, their excited chatter eventually fading away. Once I was sure they’d left, I turned to Joz.
“Plans?”
“Yeah.”
“And what are these plans?”
“Depends.”
I sighed. “Are you being purposely ambiguous, or is this a special treat for me?”
That panty-melting grin came at me again, and I almost groaned. I was so fucked. “Had any more thoughts about us?”
There was that dangerous word again. Us. Except this time, Joz had said it out loud rather than me thinking it to myself.
“There isn’t an us.”
“Not yet, no. But don’t you think we’d be fucking dynamite? You said you’d think about it, and I’m here on pins waiting for your answer.”
I nibbled the inside of my cheek. This was it. Decision time. “I think you’re trouble, but if I’m being honest, you’re the kind of trouble I want to get into.”
His eyes flared, and in less than a second, he moved into my body. Wrapping my face in big hands that shouldn’t have been capable of playing delicate strings, he tipped my head back. “I’ve been wanting to do this for far too fucking long.”
I expected a hard kiss, all clashing teeth and thrusting tongues.
How wrong could a girl be? Joz pressed his lips to mine almost tentatively, enticing me to open beneath him.
For several seconds, he just kissed me lazily, his lips moving slow yet with purpose.
A warmth spread through me like the first embers of a fire being coaxed to life.
As I trailed my fingertips up his sides, he shivered, but it was when I buried them in his hair that a rumble echoed through his chest. Dropping his hands from my face, he clamped them to my ass, lifted me, and walked me to the nearest wall.
He braced me against it, hooking my thighs over his hips.
His gigantic erection pressed right where I needed it, and I groaned.
So good. So fucking good. Better than good. Fucking incredible.
I pulled back slightly, smiling against his lips. “You’re going to destroy me, aren’t you?”
His body stilled. In a flash, the heat between us vanished. His hands flexed once on my ass, then he lowered me to the floor. He didn’t step back, didn’t speak. He just looked at me like he was seeing a ghost.
“Joz?”
He blinked, then moved. One step followed by another, then another until there was a canyon between us. “Sorry, I… I can’t.”
My brow furrowed. “Wait. What happened? What did I say? Talk to me.”
But he was already at the door, pain swirling in his eyes. “I’m not worth it, Aspen.”
“Hang on.” I made a move, but something in his body language stopped me. He’d closed down, shut himself off. My touch would be unwelcome. “You chased me. You’re the one who’s done nothing but flirt since we met, and now I’ve given in, you’re what, done? Is it all in the chase for you? Is that it?”
He shook his head. “You don’t understand.”
“Then help me understand.”
Eyes haunted, jaw clenched, he gave another shake of his head. “You want destroyed? Stick around. I’ll show you what destroying someone looks like.”
Before I said another word, he charged through the door. By the time I lurched into the hallway, he’d vanished.