Chapter 42
forty-two
GRAY
Gray’s head was spinning. This day just kept escalating. And now, with nothing but her purse and the clothes on her back, Ciar wanted her to move in and nanny his child, something she’d never done for any child, while he flitted off to Japan.
Oh, and he wanted her to decorate “their” home. Before she could even drum up a response, they were outside the two-story flat, thanking the driver, and hustling through the front door.
They found Tina on the kitchen floor, propped against the lower cabinets, her left leg painfully twisted at an awkward angle.
Ciar rushed to the older woman, kneeling by her side. She answered his questions through gritted teeth. Gray heard the ambulance sirens and ran back outside to direct the paramedics.
Ciar backed off as the paramedics assessed Tina and readied her for transportation. He gestured for Gray to join him off to the side, where he was quickly scratching out a list on a notepad at the kitchen bar.
“I’m not sure how long I’m going to be, but here is a list of how to make the formula and use the bottle warmer,” Ciar said before handing her the pad.
“Imogen should wake up any time, she’ll need her nappy changed, and then she’ll want her bottle. She has a million toys in her room. She also enjoys lying on the couch next to me down here. So, you might do that.”
His desperation at her accepting the nanny position might have been endearing if she wasn’t about to be left with a child she’d never so much as touched.
Despite their current unresolved relationship, Ciar was one of her oldest friends, and even though it went against what she emotionally needed right now from him, she wouldn’t let him down.
Moving in permanently, though—that wasn’t happening until he made good on his promise to tell her the truth about whatever happened after Colorado.
The paramedics had Tina on a rolling gurney and were wheeling her out. Ciar touched Tina’s arm when they passed. “I’ll be right behind you.”
Tina humphed in irritation. “That is certainly not necessary.”
“It is to me,” Ciar answered the older woman.
Gray could tell his answer surprised her. She clamped her lips together and nodded. The moment they were out the front door, Ciar turned to Gray and shocked the hell out of her when he gathered her into his arms and kissed her passionately.
Pulling back reluctantly, he said, “I’ll let you know what’s what as soon as I speak to the doctor. Call me for anything.” He hesitated, clearly wanting to say something else.
“What is it?”
“I hope…I…Imogen will love you, and I hope you will learn to love her too,” he said quickly.
There was nothing to say to that.
He placed his hands on their son, resting between them. “You are the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.”
And then he was gone, trusting her to care for his infant daughter. He had more faith in her than she did.
Gray leaned against the kitchen counter. Her legs suddenly felt leaden and unsteady. She had agreed to watch his daughter and live in their home for a week. Technically, she hadn’t agreed so much as not said no.
It was in that moment of silent contemplation that Gray heard the faint chuffs of a waking baby. Her spine straightened like an electrocution rod had touched her skin.
She rushed to the bottle station upstairs, neatly set up near the sink, and scanned the directions. Not sure how many ounces she was supposed to make, she decided on a full bottle. Better safe than sorry.
While mixing the formula, she texted her mother, asking her to please cancel her flight, promising to call within the hour to explain.
No sooner had she slammed the bottle into the warmer and hit start when Imogen’s surprisingly lusty wail sounded over yet another monitor. Gray tore off her coat and quickly dug a hairband from her purse, twisting her long hair into a fluffy bun on top of her head.
“You can do this, Gray,” she assured herself. Sure, she could, as soon as she called in reinforcements. She sent a text to Bébhinn and Mags, Blair was gone to Wales, and told them to bring her any clothes or toiletries she’d left behind and come to Ciar’s.
She entered Imogen’s room and found the little doll with a bumper lip and big tears dripping down her red cheeks.
“Well now, Imogen, that’s not a happy face. We’ll have to do something about that, won’t we?” Gray crooned, which thankfully had the effect of stopping further tears from falling.
Nothing like being thrown into the deep end. Taking a deep breath, Gray put on a confident smile and proceeded to introduce herself to Ciar’s daughter.
“Who has time to be a fussy pants on such a pretty day? Huh?” Gray booped her nose, earning a gummy gurgle and smile.
Not too shabby, Miss MacGregor.
“When I sold you out to Ciar, I admit that I didn’t foresee this outcome,” Mags smirked. “You have to tell me how Ciar and Cannon got on.”
“You are a,” Gray stopped before cursing over the head of the baby in her arms, “b-i-t-c-h.” She would have said more, but her phone began to ring. Ciar. It had been over four hours since he’d left for the hospital.
She answered, “Hey.”
“Hey, baby,” he said softly. “Christ, I miss you.”
Her poor, stupid heart flipped over at the sentiment. Because Mags and Bébhinn were grinning at her like maniacs, it was clear they’d overheard Ciar. She glared at them and made shooing motions with the arm not holding Imogen. They squeezed into a single chair across from the couch instead.
“Assholes,” she mouthed. For Ciar, she asked, “How’s Tina?”
“She tore a ligament in her knee, but not severely enough to require surgery. As it is, she’ll need plenty of bed rest, elevation, and icing. After that, she’ll graduate to crutches.”
“Are you able to bring her home?” Look at her, a handful of hours, and she was referring to his home as hers.
“She has to stay overnight because she hit her head pretty hard. They want to monitor her for at least one night. I’ve arranged for Dad to pick her up tomorrow and bring her home.
I wondered if Bébhinn might ask her mother if she knew of a place to hire a nurse to stay with Tina for a couple of weeks until she can get around on crutches, though the nurse mentioned she might prefer a walker for stability. ”
“Bébhinn’s here. I’ll ask her to call Rowan.” She looked down at Imogen, who was lying in her lap, her head on Gray’s knees, playing with a toy and kicking her legs.
It had taken all of a minute to fall in love with the baby girl. She was delicate and lovely with blonde wisps covering her head. Her mom had once told her that she thought Gray’s hair would never grow past wisps like Imogen’s, and then it happened overnight, and she had hair for days.
Diaper changing was an experience, especially when she pooped in the fresh diaper right away. Changing a poopy diaper was an adventure she hadn’t been ready for. At least she was getting a crash course before her baby was born.
The bottle was easy-peasy because Imogen was an old pro at the eating thing.
She would fuss until she was in a position she deemed worthy, and that was that.
She googled how to burp while Imogen finished her bottle.
The search also revealed that Gray had made two ounces too many. Imogen hadn’t complained.
She sent her mother a picture of Imogen smiling in her lap and explained about Tina, Ciar’s trip, and that she’d agreed to stay here and help out.
Her response was immediate.
Mom: I’ll start packing your things. Mom and Dad just flew in, so I can use their jet.
Mom said she is coming too. Don’t roll your eyes.
Your grandmother heard the words baby and decorating.
Between me, Mom, Raven, River, and Rowan, you can relax and take care of Imogen and finish school. See you soon.
Mom: Call your dad when you can. He’s upset and pre-mantrum.
Apparently, in less time than it took to sneeze, the word was out that she was ensconced in Ciar’s flat. Mags had been studying the two-story for inspiration for her embroidery, while Bébhinn had been nonstop texting and talking on the phone with her mom and aunts.
Gray felt like she was on a never-ending roller-coaster. She didn’t even know what would happen after a week. No matter what, the babies would need perfect rooms at Ciar’s, whether she was here or not. He was still their father, and Gray wanted them to have the best.
Ciar cleared his throat over the phone. “That would be a big help,” he admitted about Bébhinn calling her mom. “I’m leaving here in about thirty minutes. Can I pick food up for everyone?”
Gray could tell he was nervous that she would suddenly change her mind. She wouldn’t, but she was definitely more comfortable discussing dinner plans than the future.
Mags, who must have the ears of a greater wax moth—one of many facts Gray learned over the years from Blair—said, “Get us a feast from Gray Eyes. You know how I like my steak.” She added the last with a grin and wink for Gray.
Bébhinn asked her to put Ciar on speaker. “Hey, Ciar, you’d better get plenty, the guys are coming over too.”
“Of course, free food would bring them round. I’ll call the chef and have it delivered. Take me off speaker, Gray.”
Mags stood and scooped Imogen off her lap and went to the kitchen, Bébhinn following. “Okay, you’re off.”
“I want to kiss you when I get home. Will you let me?”
“Ciar,” she sighed, a huskiness to her voice that hadn’t been there seconds ago. “Your house is about to be full of people.”
“I don’t care.”
“We’re going too fast. I need things to slow down. I’m here, in your house, taking care of your daughter. My life feels like it’s been ripped out from under me and someone else’s replaced it.”
He was silent for eight heart-pounding thuds of her heart.
“I don’t want you to feel pressured. Christ,” he stopped, and she pictured him roughing a palm over his prickly scalp.
“Today was unexpected but so welcome. Well, not Tina falling, but our son, the kiss we shared at the doctor’s, and you agreeing to move in. ”
She ignored the mention of their kiss. “See, Ciar, that’s just it.
I didn’t agree to move in. I agreed to stay for a week.
Stop twisting my words.” She walked over to the gas fireplace to warm her chilled hands, frustrated that he was withholding the one thing she needed to be able to accept wholeheartedly everything they both wanted for the future.
“I’ve said I’ll give you what you need, and I will. After Japan. The minute I get home. I promise. As to moving in, I won’t lie, I’m going to do everything in my power to convince you to never leave.”
Some of the tension across Gray’s shoulders relaxed. “Day by day, then.”
“Day by day,” Ciar echoed. “I still want to kiss you when I get home.”