Chapter 51
fifty-one
HANNAH
You took away our only advantage.
You knew being crazy was the only way.
Pretending ignorance.
No memory of past deeds. Whatsoever!
And certainly, no fucking bragging.
You idiot.
You, absolute filthy, rotting fool.
You’ve screwed us all.
Hannah took every word, every slight against her character and intelligence, and swallowed it down. She had miscalculated. Played her cards too early.
She was lying in a small hospital cell strapped to a narrow bed as shivers wracked her weak body. The doctor had informed her that she would experience a range of fentanyl withdrawal symptoms like muscle pain, vomiting, panic, nausea, and, her favorite, sweating.
She tried to tell them that she’d never taken drugs, but of course, she’d heard the voices snickering in amusement at her predicament.
According to one of the voices, she’d started using the drug the moment she’d gotten out of the hospital.
The doctor said she would be through the worst of it in a few days, and then she’d be able to stand trial for attempted murder of Margaret Morrow.
Attempted.
Always and forever a failure, Hannah.
Nothing but an addict and a filthy whore for hire.
Look, I can’t say it’s been fun with you all these years, but I think, we think, it’s time to go.
“No,” she whimpered. “I’ll fix this. I escaped once. I can do it again.”
Too little, too late.
Goodbye, Hannah.
Goodbye, girl.
Bye, bitch.
Goodbye and good riddance.
We won’t meet again.
You’re on your own now.
No one to disappoint but yourself now.
“Please, please, please, please, please,” Hannah begged, tears streaming down her face while her hands fought the restraints.
Oh God, the silence. The absolute stillness inside her head. They were just being mean. They would come back. Any minute.
“Are you there?” she asked, hearing her voice crack and waver.
A nurse appeared over her, a blank expression on her face.
“Things will get better from here on out, Ms. Todd. The high dose of meds you’re being injected with now should already be helping to stabilize you.
You might be more tired at first, but trust that the doctors have your best interests in mind.
Getting free of the fentanyl in your system will also go a long way to steadying you. ”
The nurse scurried around the little room like the rat she was, not caring in the slightest that Hannah was truly dying right in front of her.
She couldn’t live without her family of voices. She wouldn’t.
It was all silent now.
A killing silence.