Chapter 50
fifty
THE WATCHER
He kept waffling on what to do. He heard her tell that man that she loved him. He said it back. However, she had been sleeping alone for two nights now.
It didn’t matter. Not really. She spoke to him on the phone while she lay in bed. She touched herself and let him watch. He tried to pretend she was putting on a show for him, but she kept saying that man’s name. It ruined the moment.
His life was in ruins. His finances were critical. He had no money, debt collectors hounded him every moment of the day and night, and he’d lost the will to try to fix them. He had no way to fix them.
He couldn’t continue this way.
He sat now in the dark and quiet of his apartment, days from being evicted, simply staring at Bébhinn’s empty bedroom and wondering if he could let her go…thinking about all the opportunities he’d let slip away.
His life had shrunk down to one video feed.
He should have been bolder. Braver.
His life was in shambles, and he was to blame.
He tried to hate her, but his conscience wouldn’t let him.
She had no idea the lengths he’d gone through to make her happy.
The hours of studying her videos, learning her habits, her favorite position to sleep in, her favorite colors, and even how she liked men to touch her body.
That had been the hardest, but it was still a lesson on how to please her.
Could he wait through another boyfriend? Could he go on hiking excursions with The Ramblers and see her smiling face and know that another man had put it there?
No. He didn’t think he could.
Her bedroom door opened, the light shining through her fabric blinds haloing the dark crown of her head. She looked over her shoulder, and that’s when he realized that she wasn’t alone.
That man was back and kissing her the moment he entered the sanctuary of her bedroom. Their hands touched everywhere.
He heard their moaning and panting, and as tears ran down his cheeks, he heard them exchange words of love.
Still, if he told her how he felt…