Chapter 10
Lucy carefully applied a thick layer of mascara to her eyelashes. Somehow, Abbey managed to talk her into a night out in the city. Not that she had put up much of a fight. Her stomach was already in knots, especially considering what had happened during their last pub outing and all the events that had unfolded these past few weeks directly related to that adventure. Even so, she looked forward to unwinding with a fruity drink and some greasy pub food.
Of course, as much as she tried to deny it, deep down, she secretly hoped they would run into Aidan. The thought alone sent butterflies dancing in her stomach. Fluffing her hair, she gave one last glance in the full-length mirror; the skinny jeans really did make her butt look good. Feeling confident and sexy, she headed down the stairs. Kaylee and Lola sat side by side at the counter, eating pizza straight from the box while watching videos on their tablets.
Lucy kissed Kaylee on the forehead. “Don’t stay up too late.”
“You either,” Kaylee said, then after some thought added, “or, you know, stay out all night again.”
Abbey burst out laughing as Lucy turned several shades of red.
“I’ll be back tonight,” Lucy said firmly.
“Should we place bets?” Abbey teased.
Kaylee and Lola smiled and wagged their eyebrows at Lucy.
Abbey put an arm around both girls’ shoulders. “If she comes home, I’ll take everyone out tomorrow night for ice cream.”
“No one is betting anything,” Lucy hissed, pulling on Abbey’s arm. “We should leave before I call this whole thing off.”
She could hear Kaylee and Lola laughing as they walked out the door.
“I’m not planning on any hookups tonight,” Lucy said. “Just so we’re clear.”
Abbey rolled her eyes. “Oh, relax. I’m taking you to a completely different pub than last time. Just keep an open mind; whatever happens, happens.”
Lucy stayed silent as they made their way toward the LUAS. A hint of disappointment passed through her; there would be no run-ins with Aidan tonight. But, perhaps now she could relax knowing another awkward meeting was off the table. A blush rose along her neck as she remembered the “off the table” comment from the Halloween disco. Had he really asked if she wanted him on the table? Yes. The answer was a hard yes.
“What’s with the goofy grin?” Abbey asked as they boarded the tram into the city.
Lucy snapped out of her daze and attempted to stop smiling. “I can’t believe I’m letting you drag me out again.”
Abbey gave her a sideways glance. “Oh, stop. Last time, you had a brilliant night. And sure, your casual hook-up led to a bit of an awkward situation, but at least you got some action. Tonight, you can find another uncircumcised cock to occupy your mind.”
Lucy laughed. “I don’t know about that. I’d probably end up screwing the principal or worse.”
“A long-lost brother we never knew we had,” Abbey suggested.
Lucy slapped Abbey’s arm. “Gross. I hope we don’t have any of those.”
“I would say the odds are against us,” Abbey said. “Dad was out there sowing his seed all around the town. I would bet we have a few siblings out there somewhere; however, I highly doubt they would end up in Ireland.”
The LUAS came to a stop at St. Stephen’s Green. Abbey grabbed Lucy’s hand and pulled her into the brisk night air. Their heels clicked along the concrete as they headed down the infamous Grafton Street. Lucy was instantly distracted, admiring all the shops along the pedestrian-only footpath.
“This place is cool,” she commented. “I’ll have to bring Kaylee here one day and do some serious shopping.”
Abbey grimaced. “It’s fun to look at, but this area is very touristy. Shopping is expensive here; you can get the same things in Dundrum or anyplace further out of the city center.”
“Well, we can come look and act like tourists.” Lucy smiled, then stopped walking and sucked in a breath. “Oh my gosh, what is this?”
“This is the famous Brown and Thomas Christmas window display.” Abbey spread her arms wide.
“Kaylee would love this!”
Lucy was fascinated by the elaborate display across several windows. It appeared to be a train theme, and each window displayed a different car on said train. The details were impressive. In one window, a mother and her children decorated a tree. Another window showcased a bustling bar with passengers celebrating the season. In yet another window, a woman sat dressed to the nines, using a vanity to apply make-up. The details in every window brought each scene to life.
“We’ll come back later,” Abbey said, pulling Lucy away from the magical display.
Abbey turned and led them up another street lined with more shops. Even at this hour, the city was lit up. The brick buildings looked old and antique, with apartments on the top floors and shopping at ground level. An enormous church stood out between a few of the brick buildings. In contrast to its red-bricked neighbors, the church was grey with ornate windows, turrets along the roof, and a large cross planted firmly to the top.
Lucy loved how this part of the city had a mix of modern and historical buildings. She had to get off her computer and explore more with Kaylee.
They rounded another corner and arrived in front of a bright red building. A group of smokers currently occupied a small sitting area covered by a black awning. Inside, the pub buzzed with noise, but it wasn’t so crowded they needed to push through a crowd to enter.
Traditional Irish music filled the air.
Lucy felt her heart kick into high gear.
Looking deeper into the pub, Lucy released a sigh of relief when she saw two unfamiliar men playing a banjo and fiddle.
“Disappointed?”
Busted. Abbey saw right through the fa?ade Lucy tried to maintain.
“You are smitten,” Abbey teased. “You’re hoping he’ll show up tonight, aren’t you?”
Lucy frowned. “The opposite, actually. I’m hoping not to see him tonight.”
“Hm-mm.” Abbey cast her sister a sideward glance. “Look, there’s an empty table. Quick, grab it.”
Lucy tossed her jacket over the back of a chair.
“I’ll get this round. You look like you need a minute.”
Abbey flashed a smirk before turning to maneuver through the crowd toward the bar.
Lucy didn’t protest; she was fully aware of how on edge she felt. Nervous energy tingled through her as her eyes darted back and forth across the room. She tried to be inconspicuous but failed miserably. It was obvious to anyone watching that she was searching for someone. She had to force herself to tone it down; otherwise, people may think she was high, or paranoid.
A game of tug of war was taking place between her heart and her head. Lucy couldn’t deny her desire to see Aidan here tonight, even though she knew it was a horrible idea. Her logical head told her he was off limits, that she would only hurt herself and Kaylee if she pursued him. Her heart, and other body parts, weren’t quite prepared to let him go just yet.
While Aidan wasn’t her first one-night stand, he was the first one she couldn’t seem to get off her mind. Every other man had been easy to forget the next day. Some men were co-workers or people she encountered daily; however, none triggered the same reaction from her as Aidan did. Being in his presence caused her entire body to shut down, leaving her speechless.
Why was she even thinking about him right now? Would she ever be able to enter a pub without scanning the place for him? Would Trad music forever be wrapped up in images of him?
“Two tables down, red shirt.”
Lucy jumped as Abbey set two glasses on the table.
“Huh?” Lucy looked up.
“I’ve been scanning the room for you.” Abbey pulled out her chair and sat down, pushing a glass toward Lucy. “It’s a great excuse to check out the men. So, red shirt guy. Take a look.”
Lucy shook her head. “I just came for drinks.”
“Just look,” Abbey hissed. “He’s looking over here.”
“I’m not interested.” Lucy stared at her orange-colored drink. “What is this?”
“Pornstar martini.” Abbey smiled. “For my little porn star.”
Lucy rolled her eyes.
“Come on, live a little,” Abbey said lightly. “Or at least give this old married woman the pleasure of living vicariously through you. You’re in a new city, making a fresh start. Where’s my wild big sister, the Lucy who didn’t give a flying feck.”
“She grew up,” Lucy said solemnly, shaking her head. “Being that wild child left me brokenhearted. It’s the entire reason I need to make this fresh start. I messed it up so badly the first time around.
“You’re so lucky to have found Rob when you did. The perfect knight in shining armor, swooping in to save the princess from the burning tower. All I ever wanted was to be loved like you are.”
The smile left Abbey’s face. She fiddled with the stem of her glass and took a shaky drink. Swallowing hard, she seemed to regain her composure. “I just want you to be happy.”
“I don’t need a man to be happy.” Lucy reached across to touch her sister’s hand. “I’m perfectly happy.”
“No, you aren’t.” Abbey narrowed her eyes. “You haven’t been happy for a long time. I get that Jeremy was a grade-A asshole, and he sucked all the happiness out of you. You thought he was your savior, a chance to escape, but he turned out to be the devil hauling you straight down the road to hell.”
“Well, that’s a depressing analogy.” Lucy frowned. ”But, you’re not wrong either. I swear I will never need a man to save me again.”
“You don’t need saving.” Abbey took another sip. “You already saved yourself and Kaylee. You left that dead-end situation and moved halfway across the world. You have an amazing daughter, a great career, and a fabulous sister. But even a badass girl needs a partner. You can still ride off into the sunset with a great guy, and it doesn’t have to be about rescuing anyone.”
“You watch too many romance movies.”
“Probably.” Abbey shrugged. “I like living vicariously, remember? Now, let’s get back to Mr. Red Shirt over there; he can’t seem to take his eyes off you.”
Lucy laughed. “I’m not ready for another one-night stand. Let’s call Aidan a lesson learned the hard way.”
Abbey’s face turned serious. “I think you like him more than you’re willing to admit.”
Lucy shook her head. “Perhaps, but I’m a bit broken, and I need to heal before I jump into anything, serious or not. Aidan was a wild card, that’s all. I had a fling with a man I never expected to see again. When I saw him at the parent-teacher meeting, I panicked.”
“And when you made out with him in the kitchen? What was that?”
Lucy shrugged. “Physical attraction?”
The band began to play, making it impossible to discuss things further. Lucy was grateful for the distraction and the abrupt end of this conversation. Tracing her fingertip along the rim of her glass, she became lost in her thoughts.
Try as she might, Lucy couldn’t hide her true feelings. Abbey was right; she was infatuated with Aidan. This man was consuming her thoughts lately. His face drifted through her mind all day and haunted her dreams at night, causing her to wake up in a cold sweat. No matter how hard she tried, she could not shake the intensity of her attraction.
It was true; she felt broken as if carrying deep scars from her past mistakes and childhood trauma. What scared her the most about Aidan was the last time she became consumed by a man; he nearly destroyed her.
Jeremy swore he would free her from the constant pain and disappointment she felt daily. Lucy believed he would, so much so, that she set him high on a pedestal he never deserved. She imagined a life straight from a book or a movie, the one that ended in happiness. For a short time, they had their happy ending, but it was merely a mirage, a false reality she clung to for survival.
They were both young, and Lucy was na?ve when they ran off into the proverbial sunset. Jeremy had nothing to his name, but neither did she. He struggled to keep a job, his car barely ran, and he lived in a tiny trailer on the back of his uncle’s property. But, to Lucy, he had all the riches in the world.
Lucy lacked attention from both her parents and was forced to grow up before her childhood ended. As long as Lucy could remember, her mother was useless. Their house was always in disarray, and food was scarce. At a young age, she learned to grocery shop and pay bills online with the money their absent father directly deposited each month for child support. As a teen, her afternoons consisted of chores and homework. Besides attending school, she rarely left the house. Making friends was deliberately avoided, as she didn’t want to answer the endless questions regarding her home life.
Although only five years apart, Lucy was Abbey’s primary caretaker. In between binge drinking, their mother somehow made it to work each day at the local bar, staying until long after closing and stumbling home to pass out in bed. There was no time left to care for her children.
Her mother was finally fired a few months before Lucy turned sixteen. The child support from their father dwindled off at about the same time. Lucy had no choice but to beg for a job at the local diner.
Leaving Abbey had been a difficult decision. After spending the bulk of her childhood raising her sister and the last two years working her fingers to the bone, she could no longer shoulder the responsibility. Of course, that meant Abbey would need to fend for herself for the first time in her life. Lucy had tried countless times to teach her sister simple things such as cooking pasta, scrubbing a bathroom, and using the washing machine. Still, Abbey had zero interest in learning life skills, and Lucy never pushed.
She had big dreams when it came to Jeremy, confident everything would be different. Finally, she would be free. Leaving home felt selfish, but Lucy had always put everyone else’s needs before her own. She had wanted to bring Abbey, but Jeremy refused. It was difficult to know whether Abbey would have come; Lucy had ensured her sister had a decent childhood, not one full of struggles and hard work like hers.
Jeremy was a dreamer and a free spirit who wanted to spread his wings and fly, going where the wind led him. Initially, the adventure was exhilarating; every day was full of new experiences and endless possibilities.
They traveled the country, sleeping wherever they found space: friend’s couches, in their car, seedy hotels, or the occasional park bench. Lucy didn’t care where they ended up as long as she had Jeremy. It was all about the adventure.
She fell hard for Jeremy and would have done anything to keep him happy. While she wasn’t a virgin when they met, her experience was on the conservative side. Jeremy lit a fire in her, igniting a raging passion, and she was desperate to please him. Like a drug addict, Lucy became addicted to him; she couldn’t break the hold he had on her, even while he slowly destroyed every part of her. The day she boarded the plane to Ireland, she swore she would never let a man consume her that way again. Not even a man as good-looking and charming as Aidan Kenny.
“Lucy, what’s wrong?” Abbey’s voice was full of concern.
Lucy looked up at the napkin Abbey held out to her. Touching her cheek, she was surprised to find them wet. Had she been crying?
“Jeremy.” Lucy released a sigh. “I let my mind wander to Jeremy.”
“That asshole. I never liked him, you know,” Abbey sneered. “And not only because he stole you from me, but because he was––.”
“A devil,” Lucy finished. “I know. You never believed he was the hero I built him up to be, dragging me down that dark path and all.”
“Look at you now, you broke free,” Abbey reminded her. “In the end, he threw you directly back to me.”
Lucy let out a huff and smiled. “That’s one way to look at it.” She grabbed the menu lying on the table and scanned it. “No more talk of men. I need another drink, and I’ve been dying to try one of these toasties. Have you had one before? They sound delicious.”
“They’re like grilled cheese sandwiches,” Abbey said. “They taste way better than the ones Mom used to make.”
“Hey,” Lucy squealed. “I’m the one who made those.”
Abbey ducked her head. “Sorry.”
Lucy laughed. “I always managed to burn the toast, didn’t I?”
Abbey nodded.
“Let’s see.” Lucy ran her finger down the list of toastie options. “I’m a simple girl; I’ll try the ham, cheese, and tomato.”
“I’ll try one, too,” Abbey said, pulling out her wallet.
“This one is on me.”
Abbey gave a strange look. “You should stay here and clean your face up.”
Lucy’s mouth dropped open. “Wow, do I look that bad?”
“Just some mascara smudge.” Abbey pulled a compact from her purse and handed it to Lucy. “Thankfully, you don’t have the dark streaks running down your face.”
Lucy gasped as she looked at her reflection in the mirror.
Abbey raised her eyebrows and disappeared into the crowd.
Lucy grabbed another napkin and dipped the edge into her drink before running it under her eyelids to wipe the mascara streaks. She snapped the compact closed just as a glass appeared over her shoulder.
“That was fast.”
“That’s what she said.” An Irish brogue tickled her ear.
Her heart hammered through her chest at the sound of his voice. Their eyes locked as he rounded the table. Her mouth went dry, and every word in the English language vacated her brain.
Casually, he sat down in Abbey’s vacant seat. “How ya been keeping?”
Lucy looked around wildly, like a rabbit caught with a predator. What was she looking for? An escape hatch? A hole in the wall? A phone booth so she could change into a superhero who could have a normal conversation with this guy?
“I can go if I’m makin’ ya uncomfortable,” Aidan said suddenly. The chair scraped along the floor as he pushed back from the table.
“No! Stay.” Her hand shot out, grabbing him by the wrist. A jolt of electricity surged up her arm, catching her off guard, and she immediately released her grip. “You can stay.”
Attempting to mask the quiver in her voice, she lifted the martini glass and gulped down the final sip.
Aidan’s eyes burned into her as she tried to swallow what felt like a burning lump in her throat.
“That’s not your usual.” He glanced at the empty glass. “What is it, or–– was it?”
Lucy swallowed hard before attempting to speak. “How do you know what my usual is?” she asked, her chin jutting out.
Aidan straightened, his mouth slightly agape. “’ Scuse me. I thought you liked a Jack and Coke, but that’s the wrong color.”
Lucy glanced at her empty glass. “This is a Pornstar Martini.”
Resting his elbows on the table, he leaned forward. “Interesting.”
“My sister picked it out, so don’t get any ideas,” Lucy said.
“Too late.” He winked at her. Then, his smile faded. “I ‘aven’t seen ya at school.”
Lucy felt her heart jackhammer in her chest. Had he been looking for her?
Lucy smiled shyly. “I don’t usually go there.”
“That’s unfortunate,” he said, the sly smile returning to his lips. “I was hopin’ to catch ya alone. In the canteen, perhaps, or some other darkened room.”
Her breath caught. “That’s probably not a good idea.” Her voice sounded breathless. “Especially after last time.”
“Aye, exactly what I was hopin’ for.”
Red crawled up her neck. Lucy dropped her gaze, afraid he would see the desire dancing in them.
“You know that can’t happen,” Lucy whispered, staring into her empty glass.
“Oh?” Aidan leaned forward, pushing the drink he had brought toward her. “Do tell me more.”
“Stop.” Lucy peeked up at him through her lashes. “You’re Kaylee’s teacher.”
“I’m not your teacher.” Aidan picked up his glass of whiskey and drank.
Lucy watched his Adam’s apple move rhythmically, remembering her lips caressing up and down the soft skin of his neck. She swallowed hard, her mouth suddenly overcome with moisture. “There has to be rules against it,” she said thickly.
Aidan shook his head and lifted one brow. “I’ve read the handbook. Several times. Nothin’ against it.”
“Surely, we’re talking about a conflict of interest at the very least?”
He made an X across his chest. “I promise to treat Kaylee horribly.”
“Don’t you dare!” Lucy’s mouth fell open. “She really likes you.”
His eyes darkened. “And her mom? Does she fancy me, too?”
Her heart raced. Did she fancy him? Yes, she probably did. But did he fancy her in return or simply enjoy the flirty banter?
Lucy tried to calm her breathing, opening her mouth to speak.
“Oh, hey there.” Abbey returned, sounding surprised.
Carefully, she set the drinks and sandwiches on the table, looking from Lucy to Aidan. Lucy suddenly began digging through her purse, knowingly avoiding her sister’s gaze.
Abbey had her hand on the back of a chair, about to pull it out, but changed her mind. Instead, she retrieved her cell phone from her back pocket and stared at the screen. “Oh, shoot, I need to go. It’s Lola. I’m so sorry.”
Abbey grabbed her jacket.
Lucy looked up. “Kaylee? Is she alright?”
Abbey waved her question off. “Kaylee is fine. It’s nothing serious, just––girl stuff.”
“I can come.”
“No, no, you stay.” Abbey tucked her wrapped toastie in her bag and slung it over her shoulder. “Someone needs to finish these drinks, and you have your toastie to try.”
Lucy’s eyes widened; her sister would not abandon her again. “I can just take it with me.”
Abbey finished pulling on her jacket. “Sure, I’m just going to clear out the tab. Finish your drink. I’ll be right back.”
Lucy opened her mouth to protest, but Abbey had disappeared into the crowd.
“She’s not coming back, is she?” She asked, slumping in her chair.
Aidan shook his head. “She’s sneaking out the door.”
Lucy whirled around to catch Abbey leaving the pub. “I’ll be sure to kill her later.”
Aidan shrugged, happy to change the subject. “A toastie?”
“I’ve never had one,” Lucy said. “Drinking gives me the munchies, and I’ve always wanted to try one of these.”
“Never had a toastie?” Aidan raised his eyebrows. “My mum used to make them for us, but I haven’t had a toastie in donkey’s years.”
Lucy burst out laughing. “What? Donkey ears?”
Aidan chuckled. “Donkey’s years, come ‘ere ya never heard that?”
Lucy couldn’t stop laughing. “That’s not a real phrase.”
“You’ve loads to learn, little lass.” Aidan winked. “I haven’t had a toastie in a long time; is that American enough for ya?”
“I like donkey ears better.”
Aidan’s smile lit up his eyes. Man, he looked so sexy right now.
“What kinda toastie ya get?” Aidan took another sip of the drink.
Lucy pulled the sandwich toward her, examining the layers. “Ham, cheese, and tomato.”
“Class,” Aidan said. “Come ‘ere, I can give ya a lift if you need.”
“I can take the LUAS,” Lucy said quickly. “It’s easy enough to get home from there.”
The sly smile was back. “I wasn’t plannin’ on taking ya home.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Lucy replied, staring at the foil-wrapped sandwich.
“Ah, worth a try,” he said, winking as he pushed back from the table. He downed the last of the whiskey and set the empty glass down. “Me mates are about to play. Maybe I’ll see ya around.”
She fought the urge to call him back as he weaved through the crowd closer to the stage. Clearly, he was itching for another night with her, but it wasn’t a good idea despite how her body was currently reacting.
Abandoned by her sister and Aidan, she sat alone in this crowded pub. Slowly, she unwrapped the sandwich and took a bite. It tasted good, but she had lost her appetite. Wrapping the toastie back up, she glanced at the makeshift stage as the band began to play.
Why was she still sitting here? In front of her sat the two drinks Abbey had bought for them; leaving them would be a waste of money. Besides, a small part of her hoped Aidan would come back; maybe this time, she would take him up on his offer.
Across the room, Aidan jumped up onto the stage. A huge smile crossed his face as he took the banjo from his friend. Stomping his foot to the beat, he began to play. Heat rushed through Lucy as she watched him. He radiated pure joy, his love for music shining through.
The music reeled her in, and soon, she lost track of time, mesmerized by Aidan’s performance. He was a born performer. She wondered if he was this passionate about teaching. Maybe teaching only paid the bills, but music was his real dream. Would he quit teaching if he could make a career out of playing music? These were great questions to ask if she wanted to get to know him on a deeper level.
Did she want to know him on a deeper level? That didn’t fit well with her “stay away from him” mission. But he was a nice guy; maybe they could be friends.
Friends with benefits.
No!
Why did she allow her brain to keep going there? A friendship with Aidan wouldn’t be possible, not when her body reacted every time she thought about him. It was best to avoid him; the only way to do that was to walk away now.
While the band began a new song, Lucy stood up and pulled on her jacket. Finishing her drink, she placed the wrapped toastie in her purse and zipped it closed. Fighting the urge to look back toward the stage, she focus on the tiled flooring and rushed out the door.