Chapter 32
32
SAMANTHA
I go to work every weekday, and half the time on weekends. I come home to peace and quiet and gentle shared jokes with my housemates. I attempt to reach out to Russo as often as seems wise, once a week, never more, and I don’t get angry when he ignores me.
A hollow space aches somewhere under my heart whenever I think of Braiden. He remains a client at the freeport, but he never sets foot on the premises. Instead, he contacts Trap directly for anything he needs.
Aiofe is already in her second month of summer school. I hope St. Agnes has continued to be a welcoming place for her, that she’s making new friends and growing more comfortable in the wide world outside of Thornfield. I hope Braiden continues to send her to therapy.
I wonder if Fairfax has settled into the Ardmore kitchen. On the one hand, he has all new appliances and counter tops large enough to butcher a lamb. On the other hand, he’s only cooking for three now. No matter how much I disliked Grace Poole, I know she was a companion for him. I hope he’s not too lonely.
My life at Thornfield seems like a distant dream. I barely had a chance to move into the Ardmore house. I can’t believe I ever wore skirts patterned with flowers. I don’t remember what it was like having my evenings free from work. And my nights…
Of course I can’t forget the things Braiden made me do. The things I wanted when I was with him. The punishment I craved, and the sweet, sweet release he always delivered.
But that’s gone now. Impossible. Not after all the things he said to me. All the things I said to him. Not after the tattoo that stains my spine.
That part of my life is gone. All I have left is the desperate hope that I can cage Russo before I’m forced to leave Diamond Freeport forever.