CHAPTER THREE LYRA
My heart beats faster at the news as I take the scroll from the messenger. Alaric moves next to me, looking concerned.
“What is it?” he asks. “What's so important that Rowan would send a messenger all this way?”
I'm wondering the same thing, because we're not exactly close to the capital. When I was first captured and taken to Aetheria, we travelled for days before we reached it.
“Let me read,” I say.
Alaric uses his control over illusions to conjure a small, ghostly light that means I can see the words written on the parchment as I unroll it. He's reading over my shoulder, his features drawn into a frown.
Lyra, Alaric,
I'm sending this to you because I have no choice.
I had thought I could respect your desire to retire into the world, but Aetheria needs you.
Things have been hard in the capital for the past couple of years.
We've been fighting back elements who want to restore the empire, while trying to ensure that there's enough food and work for everyone.
The different factions of the city fight all the time, and the situation is complicated by people with magic using it against us.
Not just within the city; now that they aren't brought here, magic users cause trouble on our borders. Our forces hold in the face of unrest, but we don’t have the power the empire once had, physical or magical.
There are those who are suggesting that we reopen the games, both to feed the magic of the city and because of the effect it will have on Aetheria’s economy.
There are plots everywhere. I've survived three assassination attempts in the past year.
I find myself pulled in every direction.
I no longer know who I can trust, or who my friends are.
Except for you. You aren't caught up in the politics of the city, and I know I can trust you both without question. Yes, even Alaric.
I smile, knowing how hot the rivalry between Alaric and Rowan has run in the past.
I wouldn't ask this of you if I didn't have to, but I need you here. I need you by my side to help me solve the problems of the city. If Aetheria fails, then all the lands around it are affected. Without you I fear that it might. Please come as soon as you're able.
Rowan (First Senator of Aetheria)
“I like the inclusion of the formal title,” Alaric says. “It makes him sound so much more important.”
The messenger looks shocked, as if he can't believe that anyone would talk about Rowan without suitable respect. He really hasn't heard about Alaric, then.
“Alaric,” I say. “You need to take this seriously.”
“Do I? Taking things seriously has never worked for me in the past. And this… this is clearly a joke. Anything where Rowan calls me his dear friend and one of the only people he can trust must be.”
The messenger only looks more shocked. I realize this isn't a conversation we can have in front of him.
“Can you wait here for a minute?” I say. “I assume you're waiting for a response?”
He nods. “Of course. The first senator said I was to bring back news when I knew you were coming.”
“You could be waiting a while,” Alaric replies.
“Alaric,” I say, taking his arm. “Can we talk about this inside?”
He looks from me to the messenger, and for a moment I think he might refuse, but then he nods.
“All right, although I'm not sure what there is to talk about.”
We go into our home. There was a time when it felt like a comfortable place, filled with our love. Now it mostly contains the memories of our arguments. I suspect that we were about to add one more to their number.
“There's plenty to talk about, Alaric,” I say. “You read the message.”
“I did,” Alaric replies. “And it still reads like a joke. Or would, if I thought that big, stone shaping commoner were capable of making jokes.”
Rowan’s magical gift is for working with stone and earth. He's common born, like me, and unlike Alaric. For a long time, he was also a rival for my affections. The two were never going to be friends in Ironhold.
“I don't see anything funny about it,” I say. “Rowan’s message is clear: things are going wrong back in Aetheria. People are trying to bring back the games.”
“And that has nothing to do with either of us,” Alaric retorts. He takes me in his arms, kissing me with surprising force.
I pull back from him, caught off guard. “What was that?”
“A reminder,” Alaric says. He looks hurt. “I want you to remember what it was like for us when we first left Aetheria. I want you to remember how free we were. And maybe I want you to remember why you chose me, not him.”
There's a note of jealousy in his voice that I haven't heard in a while. But then, I haven't been around anyone Alaric considers a threat for a while.
“Do you think this is about Rowan?” I ask him.
“Isn't it?” Alaric counters. “He sends you one message and now… I assume you’re thinking of just going running to him.”
“Not to him,” I say. “To Aetheria. He says it's in trouble.”
“And again, what does that have to do with us?” Alaric counters.
I can't believe he's being this selfish. Alaric has always put on a facade of being the self-centered nobleman, but when it comes to it, he's been there for me, he's done the right thing. Now it seems he wants to ignore Rowan’s call for help.
“We helped to save the city,” I point out. “We helped to free it from the emperor and his madness.”
We did a lot more than that. We stopped the city from being destroyed by a horde of beast whisperers rising up, and by a noble plot that would just have replaced one emperor with another, maintaining all the cruelties of the empire.
We fought, and out of that fight came the current Republic of Aetheria, which did away with the slavery and violence of the empire before it.
“Then there are plenty who would say we've done our part,” Alaric replies.
“I would have thought you’d have liked the idea of going back to the city,” I say. “You’re clearly more suited to it than to a village.”
“And if it were just some random city, I’d jump at the chance,” Alaric says.
“But Aetheria, when the Republic is still finding its feet?” He looks at me earnestly.
“Are you really so eager to go back there, Lyra? Do you really want to go back to that pit of snakes? To throw yourself into the politics and the violence of the capital?”
“It won't be the same as it was when the empire was-”
“It will be exactly the same,” Alaric insists. His grip on my arms tightens. I can hear the hurt in his voice, but also the fear for me. “Why do you think I wanted to leave so badly?”
I shake free of his grip because it has tightened to the point of being almost painful. But then, everything about this conversation is painful.
“I thought you just wanted to be with me wherever I wanted to go,” I say.
“And that’s true,” Alaric replies, unable to keep the heat out of his voice. “Why do you think I followed you here? Why do you think I stayed here?”
“So now the opportunity is here to go back to the capital, shouldn’t you be the one jumping at it?” I ask. “I would have thought the prospect of bathhouses and theatres, noble gatherings and feasts would appeal to you. Your family’s there, Alaric.”
Alaric shakes his head, vehemently. “If we go back there, we'll be stepping back into the same mess that we fought so hard to end.
Forget all this talk of republics and things being different; that isn't the way people work.
It isn't the way Aetheria works. There are still stones pumping out magic beneath it, which need to be fed with blood and power if they’re to be as strong as possible.
There are still wealthy nobles who will want to control everything.
There will still be hunger and violence, that the people will need to be distracted from.
It will still be a place where you can't trust anyone.”
“Which is why I need you beside me,” I say. I want to persuade him of this. I need to persuade him. The thought of having to do this without Alaric hurts me, makes me ache with a sense of wrongness.
Alaric shakes his head, though. “I'm not going back there to watch you get dragged into the middle of political machinations, or to watch Rowan try to get you into his bed again.”
“Is that what you think this is about?” I demand, taking a step away from Alaric. “Do you not trust me even that much?”
“It's not you I'm worried about,” Alaric says, but I’m already shaking my head.
“I'm not going to stay away from the capital just because of your jealousy, Alaric,” I say.
“This isn't about jealousy,” Alaric retorts. “It's about trying to keep you safe, and staying out of whatever trouble is brewing there. About not being drawn back into that kind of violence. It's about trying to protect you.”
“I don't need to be protected from this,” I say. “And I think… I think you're scared, Alaric.”
“You can think what you like,” Alaric says. He manages to make his tone sound as though he doesn't care but he can't keep the hurt from his face. “But I'm not going. I won't go there and see you drawn back into all of this. Stay here with me.”
“And watch you do nothing here?” I counter. “Watch you wither, because you don’t know where you fit in the world? Aetheria is where you belong.”
Watching that would hurt me at least as much as anything in the city could. I can feel pain running through me but also a kind of grim certainty. I know what's going to happen next, and in some ways we've been building towards it for months now.
“I'm going,” I say. “Whatever this is, I can't just ignore it.”
“You could,” Alaric says. “You're choosing not to.”
I don't know what to say to that, so I go to gather my things.
I collect the spear I used to fight with back in the Colosseum.
I stuff supplies into a bag, knowing I'll need them on the way.
I hope in the time it takes for me to do this, Alaric will change his mind, but when I come out again, he's sitting at the kitchen table, pointedly not moving.
“Please,” I try one last time. “Just come with me. See what's happening. If you're so worried about me being in danger, be there with me.”
“There are plenty of things I can protect you from,” Alaric says.
“But I'm not sure I can protect you from being dragged back into Aetheria.
I can't protect myself from it, either. I'm a noble there, and there will be expectations of me that I can't meet.
If I go back, I'll be dragged into it all as quickly as you. Quicker, because at least as a commoner you can stand outside the politics if you choose.”
I stare at him, not in shock now, but simply in hurt. I'd hoped he would be there for me in this, as he has been in so many other things. But maybe we've been drifting towards this for a long time.
“I'm sorry,” I say. “I have to go. I need to know what's happening there. I can't just stand by.”
Alaric sighs. He stands and moves to me. This kiss is gentler. I know he's kissing me goodbye.
“I know you can't. And I can't go there with you to watch what will happen. Goodbye, Lyra.”
“Alaric, I…” I don't have the words. We've been drifting apart, but that doesn't make the moments of separation any less painful.
Tears are still in my eyes as I head to the door.
My last sight of him before I head out and start the long journey towards Aetheria is him sitting there stony faced, obviously trying to keep his own tears in check.