Chapter 1
“Pastor, we feel that you can benefit from a leave of absence.” The head of the church board, Brother Alvin White, advised.
“I assure you; I am ready, willing and able to perform my duties as the pastor of this congregation.”
“Be that as it may, you have been through a lot. Very publicly. Might I add.” Hannah wondered how this was in any way her fault. Did she ask her husband to humiliate her in front of the entire church? “As such, the board will have to insist you take a leave of absence until further notice.”
“But—” Hannah tried to interject. She didn’t want to be sitting home with nothing but her thoughts keeping her busy. No, she wanted to do what she did best and pour her heart and soul into the church.
“Pastor, it is our responsibility to do what is in the best interest of the congregants.” Brother White interrupted.
“And you too, Pastor.” Her own godmother, Letta Long, added. Great she was turning on her too. “Many of us have known you since you were born. This isn’t a punishment. This is an opportunity to heal away from prying eyes. We are looking out for you as well.”
That had been six months ago, and Hannah was still on her involuntary ‘leave of absence’. However, because her sister Lisabeth was married to a member of the board, Nigel Laurence, she had the inside scoop. They were finally ready to allow her to return.
Her sister and she arranged to meet up north at a café/spa for brunch. Hannah arrived first. While she waited, she placed an order for a latte. This had been the first time they had come to one of their favourite spots since Jeremiah’s announcement. Her life had changed so much since then. She was now officially a divorcee. The first one in her family. She tried not to feel the shame of it. After all, it hadn’t been her idea. Not that she had done anything to stop it. In fact, once she was served, she was ready for it all to be over. “Can I borrow your pen, please?”
“Don’t you want to read it before you sign Anna?” Her sister took the document from her hands. “Actually, I think you should have an attorney look over it before you sign anything. After the stunt he pulled, I wouldn’t put anything past him.”
Of course, Lisabeth had been correct, Jeremiah had slipped a clause into the document, giving him the house. The house that she purchased with the money her maternal grandparents had left for her. She didn’t want to live in it. Not after his betrayal, but she would be damned if he and his pregnant mistress lived happily ever after in the house she purchased.
Jeremiah didn’t want the divorce dragging out, so he had abandoned the quest for the house once challenged. Hannah ended up having to give him a lump sum in lieu of spousal support. She took it as penance. Her friend and lawyer Samantha had advised her to have a prenup and to add a cheating clause. “We are Christians and ministers of the gospel. There will be no divorce. So, no, I don’t need a prenup.” Hannah had been dead wrong. The saddest part was, if he hadn’t wanted to rush the divorce, Jeremiah probably would have fought for more and won.
Well, her marriage of sixteen years was behind her. Along with it was the agony of not being able to be ‘fruitful and multiply’. Her husband had grown frustrated with her inability to conceive. At first, he had been understanding. They would pray together for God to bless their union. Then slowly she found herself praying alone. Hannah would fast and pray. It came to the point it almost rocked her faith. Until twelve years ago, she stopped. She accepted what hand the Lord gave her. Even if that hand didn’t include natural born children. It wasn’t like she didn’t offer solutions. Jeremiah refused to entertain the thought of adoption. Now he had gotten what he wanted. How had he put it? “Despite my sinful actions, God has seen it fit to still bless me.”
Hannah had to physically shake off the memory.
“Hey, Anna.” Her sister greeted. Lisabeth was her little sister, but she always had a mature, wise vibe. Often, Hannah felt like the younger one. She stood and hugged her. The two sisters were very close. It was something Jeremiah complained about. Oddly, her sister’s husband never found issue with their bond. Because he isn’t an asshat.
Hannah sighed as she sat. Her inner monologue had become profanity filled these last months. She was working and praying on it.
“Sorry, I am late. Peggy couldn’t find one of her sneakers. I swear that girl can lose anything.” Where Hannah was childless, her sister had four beautiful children. Three boys and one girl.
“I take it she found it?”
“Nope, but Nigel rushed off and bought her a new pair. Making everyone late. Could we have sent her to school with a note and saved everyone the time and aggravation?” Lisabeth nodded. “Most certainly. You know how he is if she so much as looks like she wants to cry.”
“It’s sweet—” Hannah’s words and laughter died on her tongue at the withering look her sister sent her. Her brother-in-law was very much like their dad. He adored his children, especially his daughter. She admired that about him.
“Anyway. I’m starving. Are you ready to order?”
Hannah really wasn’t interested in eating. Ironically, she spent the last sixteen years watching her weight. Only to have Jeremiah’s betrayal be the best weight loss program she ever tried. However, she knew not to refuse to eat. Lisabeth would be on her case. So, she ordered a bagel and cream cheese and a mocktail. Lisabeth ordered as well. Her metabolism should have been one of the seven wonders of the world. She ate whatever and how much she pleased. Even with four children, she still wore the same size as when she was fifteen. In her sixteen years of marriage, Hannah had gained thirty pounds. That was with her continuously trying to take off weight. The dirty thirty, as Hannah had dubbed them, were now gone and took along with it twenty extra pounds. For the first time since her late teens, Hannah was comfortably wearing a size fourteen.
Once their orders were in. Hannah just stared at Lisabeth. When her sister wasn’t forthcoming. “So? What’s the word?”
Lisabeth sighed deeply. “You are my sister and I love you.”
“Lisabeth!”
“I’m only giving you the tea, so you have the heads up. Do not repeat what I tell you, and more importantly, do not act on it. You will get Nigel in trouble, and me along with him. Promise?”
“I promise. I just need to know what happens next.” She had done all the community gardening, crocheting, and quilting she could stand.
“The board thinks it’s time you return.”
“Yes.” Her triumph died on her lips as she observed Lisabeth’s demeanour. “But?” She prompted, immediately knowing there was a catch.
“You are to remain the co-pastor.” The news disappointed Hannah. She was hoping they would assign her as the sole pastor. “The board didn’t feel it was a good look to have a divorcee pastor running the church.” Wow! Her face contorted in disapproval. She refused to voice it wasn’t her fault. The board already knew that.
Lisabeth patted her arm. “I know, Anna, they are being totally unfair.”
“I bet some of those old heads think it’s my fault he not only cheated but also stepped down in such a public manner.”
Her sister didn’t respond as she dipped her head. Suddenly Lisabeth took interest in the cutlery. Oh, they had said something to that effect.
“Tell me,” Hannah pleaded.
“There may have been talk about your inability to lead the church by yourself when you were unaware of what was going on in your own household.”
It wasn’t the first time she had heard those rumours, but hearing it from people who knew her… people who she held in high esteem. It hurt. She felt the sting of her tears. She willed them not to fall. Hadn’t she done enough crying?
“Hey, don’t take it to heart. They couldn’t be more wrong.” Lisabeth soothed.
Putting steel in her spine, she sat up straighter. “It’s fine. I’ll just have to prove them wrong.” Hannah knew her smile didn’t reach her eyes, but that didn’t mean her words lacked conviction.
The server came and placed the food before them. “Hey Sis, I am going to say grace, because I want to eat while my food is still warm.”
“The cheek!” This time, Hannah’s laugh was genuine. It wasn’t like Lisabeth was completely wrong. Sometimes… Not always, but sometimes she could be a bit long winded. She had been like this since she was little. The need to pray for all those who were less fortunate had always been strong.
“Go ahead, brat.”
Reverting them back to girlhood, the mother of four stuck her tongue out at her. Lisabeth’s prayer was brief. Then she dug into her meal. Hannah, spread a thin layer of cream cheese on her bagel. “So, are they going to include me in the process of selecting the other co-pastor?”
Lisabeth’s eyes rounded. She dove back into her plate, meticulously cutting a piece of pancake, spearing it with some scrambled eggs. She moaned around the bite. “They make the best pancakes, so fluf?—”
Lisabeth was dodging her question. Oh, no. “Did they already make their choice?”
“Mm.” Her sister nodded. However, her eyes remained glued to her plate. Hannah was disappointed. The thought had crossed her mind that the board would opt for the Co-pastors option. She was just hopeful they would include her in the decision. Her suggestions would be valuable. The church was her life’s work. A couple of the assistant pastors had really stepped up the last several months. In her opinion, they would be excellent choices.
“Who did they decide on?”
Lisabeth finally looked up from her plate. She also put down her cutlery. Then she reached her hands out towards her. Hannah just looked at her sister’s hands. How bad could it be to warrant her sister’s reaction? She guessed it wasn’t one of the assistant pastors.
“Who is it?” She demanded.
Her sister joined their hands. “I don’t want you to get upset. It isn’t a conventional choice, but Nigel thinks it might be a good idea.”
“Then why are you holding my hand like this?” Hannah raised their joined hands.
“Well, you know…” She wriggled her eyebrows. “…their choice.” A feeling of unease settled over her. She squeezed her sister’s hand, instructing her to spit it out. Lisabeth cleared her throat. “They’ve selected Pastor Cho.”
“Daniel?” There was so much hope in her voice. Although she knew it was futile. Daniel Cho headed his own large church. The only other Cho she knew of in their denomination was…
Her sister shook her head at her like she was being a silly child. “It’s Samuel.”
“They have decided on Samuel Ha-nuel Cho to the be the Co-pastor of Trinity Covenant Church. The church our great-grandfather founded? The ex-K-pop playboy? Has the board lost their damned minds?” Hannah pulled her hands from her sisters. Then reached for her phone. She had to put a stop to this madness.
“No, Hannah. Don’t touch that phone. I told you this in confidence.”
“Yeah, but this can’t happen.” She shook her head vigorously.
“It already has.”
“What!?”
“Look, I know you have all kind of issues with Samuel. Both from a professional and…” Her sister fought and barely suppressed a smirk. “… and personal standpoint. But this could be a really good thing. In the last six months the church has suffered a huge dip in membership. If there is anything that man knows how to do, it is to fill seats.”
“Yeah, at arenas.” She answered with disdain.
“You’re being petty. Since Samuel stopped being a K-pop star, he has been an evangelist. Travelling all over the world preaching. There is never an empty seat when he visits.”
“That may be, but at what cost? We don’t need some rock star looking pastor. It’s completely irreverent. Is that what they want for Trinity Covenant Church?”
Hannah hadn’t realised her hand was pressed to her chest until her sister pointed it out.
“Do not work yourself up. Stop pressing your hand to your chest like that. Also, you might think about not being so judgy.”
Hannah wasn’t judging. Was it wrong to acknowledge there was a certain way things were done?
Wait!The thought struck her. “Did you say it was already settled? How can it be already settled?”
“They are going to call you in and talk to you tomorrow.” Her sister sighed. “But they already offered him the position, and he accepted it.