Chapter 30 #2
“Sorry.” Larkin extends his hand for me to take. “You wouldn’t snap out of it so…I sent a surge of light your way.”
My mouth drops open. “Are you insane?”
“Tell me I was incorrect for doing that?” He leans closer.
Kalix disappears, and I inhale the fresh sea air.
“Something went wrong, and I’m not letting you go back toward her. That blast snapped you back into reality, my friend.”
“Thank you.”
“I told you I have your back, and I wasn’t lying, but I’ve unfortunately made you bleed in this situation.”
He smirks, proud of his reaction. I roll my eyes.
I grab his hand, letting him pull me off the ground. Maines rushes over and lifts my shirt, exposing a cut on my lower back. After a quick examination, she lowers my shirt again.
“You’ll be okay. It’s a superficial wound. Nothing that will scar. I’ll save my healing magic for when you kick Larkin’s ass for doing that.”
Larkin smiles broadly and walks back to the circle.
I brush my clothes off and tame my messy hair. Oak dusts my upper back as I join them again in the training circle.
“Well, that went horribly wrong,” Oak says with a shrug. “Let’s try another route before Silas shows up and murders us all.”
Larkin nods. “We’re going to have to try to get it to come up organically. Deep diving isn’t an option right now until you have more control.”
“I don’t have much control, Larkin.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Not from her,” I respond.
A rush of breeze moves through me, and I swear I hear a vicious laugh echo in my ears.
I shake off the fear. I’m here, and I’m alright.
I widen my stance once more and prepare for the next portion of this miserable training.
Although my back stings, I’ll be fine, and I can’t wait for Silas to find out that Larkin hit me.
“So, since I just blasted Briar, Oak, it’s your turn.” Larkin motions Oak to come forward.
Oak looks around and says, “I’m not trying to get Silas Nastronde on my bad side. After all, he’s my best friend.”
Maines throws her hands in the air, exasperated. “Again, everyone is your best friend but me.”
“I have to tell them all that.” Oak winks and whispers, “Don’t worry.”
Larkin rubs his head and snaps his gaze at me. I shrug, as if to signal that this happens constantly.
“Oak, get in the circle,” Larkin warns.
“Wait, I thought Maines was going to do this,” Oak responds.
Larkin turns to Maines. “Given how this is already going, we will need her to heal, not fight.”
Maines lets out a relieved breath, and Oak moves slowly into the center of the circle and sighs. I smile, watching the drama leak from him, and return my gaze to Larkin, waiting for the next orders.
“Briar, go face Oak.”
I drag my feet and center myself, facing Oak. He lifts his brows twice, teasing me, and I can’t help but grin. He’s utterly ridiculous.
“Oak, please begin to zap Briar gently,” Larkin instructs. “We want to get her emotions going to see if we can evoke her Lumor ability to present itself.”
Oak smiles. “Alright. This could be fun.”
Before I have time to react, small zaps of light begin to erupt from his palms, crashing into my sides, legs, and arms. It stings, but it’s a pain I can handle.
I move aside, attempting to dodge as many as possible, but they keep coming.
Instincts kick in, and I feel my shadows wanting to retaliate.
“Don’t think about your shadows,” Larkin shouts. “Only focus on your light. Use that to defend yourself.”
I continue to jump and shuffle around the circle, unable to coax any light to come forward. Oak continues to send small bursts of lightning my way, and frustration builds in my chest.
“Stop! It’s not working,” I shout to Oak.
He ignores my request and continues to tease me with his wielding ability. Larkin and Maines watch from the sidelines and don’t come to my defense to tell him to stop. The frustration builds stronger, and the shadows begin to swell around my palms.
“Wrong direction,” Larkin bites.
That doesn’t alleviate my frustration, which is quickly bubbling into anger. Control seems to slip away from me, replaced by my fury, and shadows pulse around me.
“Wrong,” Larkin calls again. “Way.”
I lower my gaze, narrowing my eyes, and Oak’s eyes widen as he notices the anger building in my chaotic shadows.
“Shit,” Oak mouths, knowing what’s coming. “Maybe I should stop?”
“Don’t,” Larkin barks.
A surge of darkness rushes from my palms, striking Oak and sending him sprawling outside the training circle. He lands with a thud as his back hits the ground, releasing a pained breath.
Maines rushes to his side, and Oak supports himself on his elbows. He shakes his head and allows Maines to assist him in standing.
“Gods, you knocked the fucking… breath out of me,” he huffs, clutching his chest.
“I’m sorry,” I say, grimacing. “That was more of a reaction than a conscious decision.”
“This isn’t working.” Larkin steps toward us. “We are going to have to try something else.”
“Or, we could just stop,” I add.
“Silas told us to get you to use your dusk abilities, and I’m not leaving until that happens.” Larkin runs his hands through his white hair. “Briar, go back to the circle.”
“Can I have a second?”
“No. You can’t. You are charged right now, and we need to keep this going.”
I shake my hands and move back to the center of the circle. The breeze seems to pick up, and I glance at the few charged crystals that line the border. They pulse as my magic enters and dance with excitement. Maines and Oak stay outside of the line and watch intently.
Larkin dusts off his hands and steps across the line. A surge of power illuminates the crystals, and my brows shoot up. He stands opposite me and stares intensely into my eyes. The direct eye contact is distracting, so I break my stare and look at the ground for a second.
“You are being weak,” Larkin’s voice travels across the space. “Scared.”
I snap my gaze up. “What?”
“You aren’t trying. You’re comfortable remaining in the shadows. You choose to linger there,” he taunts. “Because you want to be there.”
“You are joking.”
“Then prove me wrong,” he snaps.
“You think I chose this? You think I wanted this path for my life?” I furrow my brow.
Larkin begins to pace. “I believe you have forgotten that there is light in this world.”
“That isn’t true.”
“It seems that you are so accustomed to the darkness that being consumed by it feels effortless—easy—and you are being lazy.”
“You’re insane,” I hiss.
Larkin huffs, “And you are being a pain in my ass.”
“Then leave,” I snap.
“Nope.”
“Then, shut the fuck up.”
“Again,” he says, narrowing his gaze. “No.”
We begin to slowly step in a circle, never allowing our backs to turn to one another. I know he’s taunting me, trying to provoke a reaction, but I’m determined to resist. I won’t let his words triumph.
“I believe you forget who inhabits this body, who resides deep within me.” I narrow my gaze and feel the anger crawling up. “I could easily kill you.”
“Oh, are you threatening me now?” Larkin smirks. “Awesome.”
“A threat and a reminder.”
“I didn’t forget. I choose not to let it cloud my judgment when it comes to you. I can separate you from the darkness,” Larkin scoffs. “Unlike yourself.”
I harden my steps. “I am not Kalix.”
“Then stop allowing the darkness to control you, Briar. It will consume you. Let the light guide you,” Larkin begs. “Let it counter what lives within you.”
I freeze in my tracks, his words sparking something in my memory.
Yara.
She said something during her last moments in Malachi’s office: “When I’m gone, look for where the light illuminated. Look to where the light guided you.”
That was a message, a clue to something. I didn’t realize it at the time, due to the chaos of the moment.
It was her bedroom. I have to go to her bedroom.
“Larkin, we have to stop.” I turn my back to him and bound forward to cross over the circle. “I need to go somewhere.”
Another breeze moves around me, and I slow my steps, feeling the crackling of lightning dancing around me as Larkin draws into his own powers.
“What would your brother think?”
“What?” I snap, keeping my gaze forward.
“Wouldn’t he want you to run from the darkness?” Larkin’s power grows in his palms. “Would he be proud of you right now?”
My body comes to a halt, and I turn slowly to face Larkin once more. He knows exactly which cord to strike.
“Don’t fucking say a word about him,” I seethe.
“Why?”
I nearly growl.
“Prove it, Briar. Show me what you can do.”
I drop my gaze and bound toward him. I dive into my magic, but this time, I ignore the call of the darkness.
Anger fuels me, and I allow my instinct to guide me.
My brother’s words flow into my mind the night he died.
He told me I was strong, stronger than him.
Emotion floods me, and I race forward, my feet slapping the ground.
If Larkin wants me to prove it to him, I'll give a show.
I look over the cliff toward the sun rising in the bright sky.
Light.
I need light.
A brilliant tingle moves into my palms as I approach Larkin, and a grin spreads across his face.
“That’s it,” Larkin calls. “Push.”
I ignore his praise and thunder forward. Lightning zaps my open palms. Maines and Oak watch with wide eyes beside us, and out of the corner of my eye, I see Oak pull Maines slightly behind him in case there is fallout.
I stand inches from Larkin’s face, allowing the light to charge within my body and soul. His words become a driving force as I concentrate the light, urging it to come forward. For a moment, the sun appears to shine brighter, and I realize the light is coming from me.
“Do it,” Larkin whispers. “Let it out.”
I grind my teeth together.
“Show me,” he says.
I slam my palms together, allowing the surge of light to flow through me. I strain every muscle against the unfamiliar surge of burning power, but I don’t hold back.
“You are too close to him,” Maines screams from the side. “Back up!”
I glare into his dark eyes, intoxicated by the power coursing through my system. Larkin remains still, prepared to endure any blow I see fit. I could kill him right now at this distance, and I grit my teeth, fighting back the urge.
The memories of what he said about my brother, what he sold him, and the danger he placed Barlowe in swirl in my mind. I am furious with him, so furious, but I don’t want to kill him.
Yet here Larkin stands, unmoving and ready to accept the fate he believes he deserves.
A sadness spreads through me, and the shock of the need for the power to exit my body takes over.
I push my palms down, away from him, facing the ground, and the flow of my light stings as it leaves my body.
I scream, and a bright light of power erupts, letting the magic, anger, and sadness leave my body.
The blinding light explodes, and we both go flying backward.
We crash against the ground in opposite directions, and my vision blurs as I hit the grass, my head slamming against the earth. Maines rushes to my side, and Oak goes to Larkin.
“Gods.” I hear Maines scream as she kneels next to me.
I groan from the hit and roll to my side, glancing toward Larkin. I do a quick survey of pain and don’t feel anything other than the ache in my lower back and shoulder. I lift my hand and feel against my face, and a scratch sits high on my cheek under my eye.
“I’m okay.” I sit up.
I look across the circle and see Larkin sitting up as well, rubbing his head.
Relief washes over me seeing that he’s okay, but regret hits me harder.
I thought about killing him; it was short-lived, but it crossed my mind.
Maybe I’m destined to thrive in darkness, as my thoughts seem to wander there every time the anger creeps in.
Oak brings Larkin to his feet, and although my vision is still a bit blurry, I see him smiling widely. His shirt is ripped, his hair a mess, and a long scratch on his face matches mine, along with a few others peppering his neck and chest.
He looks worse than I do.
“She’s fine,” Maines shouts across the circle.
Oak nods while Larkin limps toward me. Maines gives him some space, and Larkin extends a hand for me to rise.
I grasp it, and he pulls me up. A flash of pain courses through me, but I ignore it.
I stand before him, bracing for my reprimand for losing control yet again.
He towers over me, and his stare sears into mine.
Larkin lifts his arms, and I flinch, ready for a blow back.
Surprise hits me as he tightly wraps both arms around me, pulling me into the tightest hug.
I stay in shock for a moment, and then he hugs me even tighter.
I look at Maines through his arms, and she smiles.
I return the embrace and wrap my arms around him, squeezing as tightly as he does.
A calmness moves through me, and I can’t help but imagine I’m hugging my brother.
I feel safe, happy, and a tad guilty for almost hurting him, but I bury my head into his chest nonetheless.
He pulls away and slaps both hands around my shoulder. “That was fucking awesome.”
“I could have killed you.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t,” he responds, casually. “I wasn’t worried.”
“Liar.”
“You’re right,” he laughs. “I was seconds from panicking.”
I crook a smile.
“I’m sorry I mentioned your brother. I didn’t mean anything I said.”
“I know.”
“I wanted to see if emotions would motivate you, since the elements didn’t, and boy was I right.” Larkin shakes my shoulders.
I can’t quite pinpoint him, but he’s proud. So proud of me, and I can’t help but laugh.
Oak walks up. “You two look like you’ve been in a tavern fight.”
“Gods, an ale sounds great right now,” Larkin says, and releases my shoulders on a laugh.
I watch him and angle my head.
“Yeah, it does,” Maines agrees.
“I’d say that’s enough for today,” Oak says, grasping Maines hand to lead her back to the house. “We will head to the castle in about an hour. You two should definitely clean up.”
They continue forward, leaving Larkin and me standing in our small ruin.
“Thank you,” I say to him.
“For what?” he asks.
“For pushing me, for challenging me, and for being there for me.”
He nods. “Always.”
My heart swells. I may have lost my older brother, but I feel as if I’ve gained another.
I glance down at my hands and can’t hide the shock on my face when I see that one of my fingertips is no longer covered in darkness.
It’s normal and pale. I tuck my hands into my pants and ignore the urge to stare.
“I need to do something before we meet with Aerona,” I say, as I walk toward the house.
Larkin follows behind me with a limp. “Alright. What can I help with?”
I pause and stare at him. “We need to get Silas and go to Yara’s bedroom.”