Chapter 10 #2
“He ran up here with me momentarily, but it has nothing to do with him,” I whispered, not bothering to bullshit about ‘nothing being wrong.’ He knew me far too well, and if he really wanted to push it, then I would tell him.
His eyes darkened. “Is this about the humans?”
For the record, I knew he would bring up Amun being in here later, but he seemed determined to get me to reveal my cards.
“I am angry about that.”
“Arabella, damn it, what is going on?” he growled, his eyes going dark as I felt his terror form shift against his skin. My hands gripped his jaw, and I figured that it was better just to test my theory.
Leaning up, I cautiously pressed my lips against Razar’s in a soft, almost testing touch. My stomach tightened and heat ran over my skin as I tried to deepen it, my tongue darting out to trace his lips. That’s about what did it.
I honestly wasn’t positive what reaction I had expected from him, but this? Shit. This was far more extreme than I could have ever hoped for.
I moaned against Razar’s mouth as his hands suddenly gripped my hair, seeming to recover from his momentary shock as his power wrapped around me, icy tendrils pulling me further against him.
His breath was minty and cool against mine as a low growl broke from his throat, his kiss demanding and hard.
I squirmed against him as my heart began galloping a million miles an hour, so fast I was worried it would give out.
I gasped as I was suddenly pressed on a different surface, my frame wedged against Razar’s as I gave into him completely, loving the control he seemed to like having over my body.
The grip he had on me was bruising, and I found myself craving that.
I wanted his mark on me, just like I wanted Cy’s teeth on me.
I rolled my hips against his hard length as a low snarl left his throat and vibrated against my entire body.
My eyes fluttered shut as he pulled away and began to kiss down my throat, my body trembling with need, loving the way his magic seemed to be touching me everywhere all at once.
I could feel his hands on my waist, but his magic had my thighs in a tight, almost harness hold, my arms being drawn above my head as his black, vine-like energy caught me up like in a spider’s web.
When he pulled back and looked over me, his breathing was harsh, and I realized I was somewhat tied up for him. We were also a story off the floor, but I wasn’t going to overthink that one.
“Fuck,” he growled. “You look so beautiful. I wish I could keep you up here, like this, forever.”
He could.
“Razar.” A small whine broke from my throat as his gaze flashed from my thighs spread on either side of his large body up to my neck, where my pulse beat fast and out of control.
“I can smell how wet you are.” He groaned as if in pain, his head pressing against my collarbone as he inhaled against my neck. “I can’t though. I can’t, Arabella, because I know if I get more than a taste of you, it won’t be enough.”
“You can have more than that,” I promised, feeling a surge of hopefulness.
My eyes fluttered shut again as his fingers brushed beneath my sweater, exposing my lace bra to the cool air, a snap telling me that my bra was torn down the middle.
My center tightened as I felt cool, hard tendrils wrap up and around my ribs before brushing over my sensitive, hard nipples, causing me to let out a moan of his name.
When his hot mouth closed over one of them, my body jerked with pleasure, and I nearly came right there and then.
A whine of frustration, embarrassingly coming from me, filled the space as his fingers slid down my waist and into the silk band of my pants, his touch brushing over my heated, covered center.
He snarled, feeling how wet I was as my legs trembled slightly, needing a more firm touch. Needing him to be rough with me.
I felt a surge of victory as he began to tease my other nipple with his mouth, leaving the painfully tortured peak of the other to the cool air as he pushed aside the lace panties I was wearing.
“Shit,” I whimpered as his hot, rough fingers slid against my wet heat, a dangerous sound from his throat echoing through the room.
“I can’t take this any further, but I won’t leave you in pain,” he growled against my neck, my hormonal haze making me nod, because frankly, I was so on edge that all it would take was a kiss on my neck to make me come.
I felt an almost untamable lust surge through me, and when he circled my clit, dragging my slick across it, I felt my climax build to almost a tipping point.
Then the sexy bastard slid a finger inside of me while biting down on my neck, light enough that it wouldn’t mark but hard enough that it caused an electric surge to jump through me.
I came almost instantly on a moan of his name, molten heat and an explosion at my center causing everything to melt around me in relief. Thank god.
My body slumped forward as I let out a small pathetic sound, his touch softer but still possessive as I felt the air shift, the hard wall being replaced by my familiar bed.
When I felt him start to pull away, I gripped him closer, a sated smile invading my face at the chuckle that broke from his lips.
It wasn’t his full laugh, but it made me feel a tiny bit better.
I knew he was in complete human form now, his vine-like tendrils receding completely. A stinging on my body told me there would be bruises on my wrists and thighs, and I didn’t mind one damn bit.
But I should have realized that Razar would.
A pained noise broke from his throat, and my eyes snapped open to find him examining my wrists, a tortured look covering his face before he could shutter it.
I went to go tell him that I felt amazing and that we could do that any time…
you know, since I had finally gotten to feel Razar against me like I’d always wanted to.
But before I could, he was up and pacing by the side of the bed.
I tried to adjust myself, sitting up and feeling suddenly embarrassed, my fingers sliding against the light bruising on my wrists.
I mean, sure, there was a mark… but I liked that.
A lot. Nightmares loved roughly, clearly, and I was finding that I found that far more attractive than I could have ever expected.
“I like them,” I blurted out. “I don’t mind the bruises, at all.”
I mean, that couldn’t be all that odd right? There were humans that liked rough sex, so why did I feel almost embarrassed by what I was admitting? Or maybe not embarrassed, but just cautious, because I had a feeling Razar wouldn’t see it the same way.
He froze and shook his head, continuing to pace as I jumped from bed, steadying myself and approaching him. He winced, his finger coming up to brush my lip as he looked down at me.
“I’m supposed to protect you, not hurt you,” he growled.
“It doesn’t hurt, I feel amazing,” I promised, holding my breath as he examined my expression. Disappointment surged through me as he stepped back and grabbed my wrist, kissing it briefly before seeming to emotionally distance himself even more.
“I need to get out of here,” he responded in a choked tone. “I don’t trust what I’m going to do.”
“Razar, don’t,” I whispered, gripping his forearm. “If your fear of what you could do to me is what’s been holding you back, holding whatever this is back, then that is my decision also. I like how rough you are—”
He turned towards me, his eyes flaring. “Rough? That wasn’t fucking rough, Arabella. My version of rough would fucking kill you.”
I winced at his tone as regret flashed on his face. Tears welled my eyes as embarrassment and confusion filled the widening emotional abyss between us.
“So that’s it? It doesn’t matter what I want, it doesn’t matter that we could at least try—”
“I am not risking your safety.” His tone was firm.
“Don’t you want me?”
My voice was weak, and I knew I was fucking begging him to give me something. I mean, this nightmare was not only my best friend, but the first person I had ever admitted to loving. I just needed him to tell me something, anything to give me hope that we could figure this out.
Razar turned away before I could read his reaction to my words, his jaw hard as he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter what I fucking want, I would rather never touch you again if it meant you not having bruises all over your body.”
Okay then. Point made.
“Fine,” I whispered, feeling a surge of anger. “Fucking fine.”
I moved past him as I walked towards my closet, grabbing some clothes before going into the bathroom.
I didn’t lock it, but when I heard the main door to my bedroom close, a small, sad sound broke from my throat, realizing that he meant it.
Amun had been right after all... which meant that I couldn’t ignore the truth.
My nightmares would never fully be mine.