13. Scarlett
I woke up to sunlight on my face.
My drawn curtains were open a bit in the center, and the sun just happened to rise perfectly in that crack. It blanketed me with warm light, the heat enough to stir me from my sleep. But I didn’t mind in the least because I didn’t wake up alone that morning.
I was on my side with Axel pressed up against my back, his chest like a warm blanket against my bare skin. His arm was hooked over my waist, his hand resting on the sheets beside me. With his slow breathing, he appeared to be dead asleep.
I would have thought last night was a dream if he weren’t there beside me. We shared the same pillow, shared half of the mattress and disregarded the rest. I closed my eyes again and treasured his presence, so happy that he was there with me instead of in his house on the other side of the city.
I lay there for a while, appreciating the morning rather than despising it. It was the first time I’d felt happy in weeks…maybe a month. All the chaos that had happened was distant in the rearview mirror.
I gently slipped out of bed without disturbing him, put on whatever clothes were the most easily accessible, and then crept out of the bedroom without waking him. Before we were married, I used to make him breakfast in the morning. But when I walked to the fridge, I realized I had no food.
I hadn’t eaten much these last few weeks.
I quickly walked to the market, grabbed what I needed, and when I came back, he still wasn’t awake. I got to work in the kitchen, making chocolate chip pancakes and applewood-smoked bacon, along with hashbrowns made from scratch. I’d cooked in preparation for my new restaurant, but that didn’t make me happy, not like it did when I cooked for him. Lost in what I was doing, I hummed under my breath, the pans sizzling with the light coming through the uncovered windows.
“Damn, something smells good.”
I nearly gave a jump when I heard his voice right behind me. I was standing at the stove over the hot pans, and I turned the burners down low before I set the spatula on the counter. When I turned to him, I expected to see his handsome and sleepy face and his messy hair, but I didn’t expect to see that grin…that playful, arrogant, happy grin. I stilled when I saw it, coupled with the brightness in his beautiful eyes. I was about to ask if he was hungry, but the sight of him made me lose my train of thought.
He seemed to know my thoughts because he hooked his arm around the small of my back and pulled me in for a kiss. “I was referring to you, by the way.” His hand traveled down and squeezed my ass through my jeans. He gave my ass a quick pat before he walked to the coffee machine and made himself a cup.
I stared at his muscular back as I felt a soaring sensation inside my chest. I was fully awake, fully aware of the world around me, but I felt like I was walking through a dream. Time felt different. It was slow…and easy.
He took a sip of his black coffee then turned back to me. “Can I help?”
“No. Almost done.”
He carried his mug to the dining table and sat down, in nothing but his boxers, slouched in the chair in his typical I don’t give a fuck fashion. He absent-mindedly pushed his fingers through his unkempt hair before he rested his fingers around the handle of his mug, his eyes studying me. Once they landed on me, they stayed there, content with just watching me move about the kitchen.
I turned to the stove and got back to work.
We sat together at the table, the dishes between us laden with far more food than either of us could ever eat.
Just like he used to, he stacked his plate high with food and went to town, eating everything like he was starving. He gave a moan as he chewed. “This is what I’m talking about.” He gave a nod in approval then took a drink of his coffee.
“I guess I haven’t lost my touch.”
“I think you’ve gotten better.”
“I’ve been designing the menu for the restaurant.”
“And it offers chocolate chip pancakes?” he teased.
“I thought I could offer brunch on the weekends.”
He sliced his fork through the little cakes in preparation for another bite. “I like that idea. But you still need to cook for me—don’t forget that.”
I smirked as I looked down at my plate. “I won’t.”
We ate in comfortable silence, like we’d gone back in time to before we were married, still getting to know each other between our sexy romps on theliving room couch and in the bedroom.
He wore his wedding ring, the black ring dark in comparison to his fair skin.
I’d taken mine off before I’d left. I imagined it was in his nightstand…if he hadn’t thrown it away.
He wiped his plate clean, devouring everything like he hadn’t eaten in weeks. It was such a contrast to my father picking one ravioli at a time and taking an eternity to finish it, or when Theo couldn’t bring himself to eat more than a few bites of my cannoli. Axel ate like a starving animal…and I found that so attractive.
When he was finished, he took another drink of his coffee and sat there and stared. Stared long and hard, stared like the eye contact wasn’t too intense to handle. There was no anger or resentment in his expression. It was as if I’d never left.
“I missed you.” I’d missed this.
“I know, baby,” he whispered. “I missed you too.”
My departure had turned him into an angry maniac, but now he was back to exactly who he used to be, a man so perfect it was hard to believe he wasn’t a magic trick. It was easy to forgive and forget. “Can I move back in?”
He smirked. “You think I’d let you live here?”
A hot, intoxicated blush moved to my cheeks. His affection was the best drug I’d ever had.
“Not a chance,” he said. “We’ll pack up when we’re done with breakfast.”
“I don’t feel like packing.” There was only one thing I felt like doing, and while it was far more exertion than packing, it was far more pleasurable.
His eyes turned confident and playful, like he knew exactly what I wanted to do instead. “I like your idea better.”
“Did this pussy get tighter?” His hand pushed into the back of my neck, pinning my face into the rumpled sheets underneath me. My ass was in the air, and his hips thrust into me hard. “Wetter?” His fingers fisted my hair as he pinned me down, fucking me like a whore rather than his loving wife. My wrists were pinned together against my back by one of his big hands. “Prettier?”
As I started to writhe, my wrists twisted to break free, but his hold only tightened. I couldn’t lift my head because I was secured in place by the mountain of his weight. Tears sprang to my eyes as incoherent moans were unleashed. “God…”
He gave a moan as I tightened around him. “That’s a good girl.”
My body continued to take his monster cock as pleasure exploded inside me, a high so distinct it was like surfing the clouds. Everything turned fiery hot, and I suddenly stopped caring how hard it was to breathe with my face against the sheets. It just felt so good to be fucked like this, to have a man who wanted to fuck me like this.
He came a moment later, giving a loud grunt before he shoved himself fully into me, releasing inside me as I rode the last wave of my high. Feeling him come inside me made it last a little longer, made the fire burn just a little hotter.
He finally let me go as he stepped away and headed to my bathroom to shower.
As my arms returned to my sides, I winced at the stiffness in the muscles. I was finally able to turn my head farther away from the sheets to take my first full breath. My pussy was sore from the mammoth tree trunk that had just invaded every inch, but it also burned with the aftershocks of a climax.
I finally straightened and let the stiffness ooze away. I rolled onto my side and lay there, my top still on because he’d been in too much of a rush to take his time. It was around noon, so not enough time had passed for me to want a nap, but I lay there and closed my eyes like I could drift off.
I must have fallen asleep, because Axel seemed to step out of the shower just three seconds later, dragging the towel through his short hair to dry the strands, the rest of his muscular body on display. That arrogant grin moved to his jaw. “Knocked you out cold, baby.” He came to the bed then gave my ass a playful spank.
I propped myself up on one elbow to look at him, my hair a mess from the way he’d gripped it.
He dropped the towel and lay on the bed beside me, the morning light gone from the room because it was afternoon. He was propped on his elbow, looking at me with those stunning blue eyes.
“I hope our babies have your eyes.” It was the first time I’d said exactly what came to mind, that I didn’t censor my thoughts or feelings because I was guarded or because I didn’t want him to know the depths of my affection. I just let it out…and it was nice.
Instead of that arrogant smirk, his eyes were intense, like those words were a real provocation. “Want to find out?”
“Not right now.” A realization suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks. “But I haven’t been taking my pill…got sidetracked.”
Instead of panicking like any man would, he didn’t seem to care.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’ll restart it, but you should probably wear?—”
“I’m not wearing anything. And I’m not going to pull out either.”
“That sounds like a dangerous game?—”
“And I like danger.” He smirked. “If it happens, it’s a blessing. If it doesn’t happen, then it’ll happen later.”
“You should be freaking the fuck out right now.”
“You’re not some woman I picked up in a bar, baby. You’re my wife.”
Most of my friends were excited for motherhood since they were in their early twenties, but I’d never been that way. I had other goals I wanted to achieve before I changed my life irrevocably. I wasn’t looking to be a mother right now, but being the mother of his children didn’t sound scary to me.
His eyes continued to watch me.
My eyes dropped to his chest, seeing the hard pecs that looked like the stone pillars that still stood in the ancient city of Pompeii.
The playfulness in his eyes started to set like the sun. “We need to figure out what to do about your father.”
My eyes immediately closed, and the winter storm swept through me. Agonizing pain that had started to penetrate my mind tried to break into my body, but I continued to block the doors. “No.”
“Baby—”
“Please.” My eyes lifted to his. “Can we just…stay like this for a while?”
His eyes hardened in sadness as he looked at me. Seconds ticked by as the sympathy came through. “Alright…but just for a short while.”
Axel had his men come to my apartment and gather all my things—again.
The only things left behind were the furniture and all the pots, pans, and dishes in the kitchen. It was ready for a tenant, someone who wanted to be walking distance to the market and all the nearby shops. The rental income would cover my mortgage, although I should probably consider selling it because I didn’t exactly need it anymore.
When I walked back into our bedroom for the first time, it was clean and tidy, the scotch and cigars put away, the bed made like no one had slept in it since I’d been gone. I saw a prism of color coming from the nightstand, and as I approached, I realized the beauty came from my stunning wedding ring.
The ring I never should have removed.
I stared at it for a moment before I slid it onto my left ring finger and over the knuckle, aware of Axel watching me from behind.
“Better not take it off again.”
When I turned around, I saw the partial smile on his lips, the affection that dimmed the resentment. “I won’t.” I admired it on my hand, the ring I’d missed since the moment I’d taken it off. I’d been coerced into marriage with him, but once I was his wife, it was really hard not to want to be.
My father had texted me multiple times asking if I wanted to talk over gelato, but I told him that I’d taken his advice and decided to give Axel another chance. This all happened through text, thankfully, because I wouldn’t have been able to keep a straight face or steady my voice. He was clearly preoccupied with his plan to fuck over Axel and Theo because he accepted my explanation without further inquiry. Maybe he assumed I would go back into the honeymoon phase—or, as I suspected, he was too busy with his own coup to care.
I didn’t tell Axel that he’d texted me because I was afraid the mention of him would provoke the conversation I didn’t want to have, to force me to accept the horrible truth I’d ignored for so long.
It was a defense mechanism, shielding my mind from the horrible truth.
Axel and I sat across from each other in the bathtub, bottles of wine and champagne on the table Aldo had provided, and there was a pizza there as well. We’d eaten most of it, and Axel waited until I was done eating before he devoured everything left over.
“Sometimes I wonder if you actually love my cooking or you just love food.”
His arms were spread over the sides of the tub as he lounged there, most of his chest exposed above the water line. “I do have a soft spot for pizza. It’s the kind of food that’s never bad.”
“Fair,” I said. “I’m glad you rehired Aldo.”
“I never really fired him. After you left, I went downstairs and told him to put his stuff away.”
“Good.” I’d felt terrible that I was responsible for what happened. If I’d just listened to Aldo, he wouldn’t have lied and gotten himself canned. “I felt so bad.”
“Don’t. He shouldn’t have lied, especially about something like that.” He grabbed his wineglass and took a drink. “I told him he would be unemployed if he ever chose to speak on my behalf that way again.”
“He was probably just afraid of your reaction when I broke down your door?—”
“I don’t care. It’s unacceptable to tell my wife I’ve been unfaithful when I haven’t been.”
That made me feel wonderful…and also shitty. “So…you weren’t with anyone else?” I assumed that was the answer, but I wanted to know for certain.
His beautiful eyes suddenly turned hostile. “You have a lot of gall to ask me that.”
“I assumed no, but I just wanted to?—”
“You didn’t assume if you had to ask,” he snapped. “And no, there was no one else. There’s never been anyone else since the moment you agreed to marry me.”
My eyes dropped to the bubbles on the surface. “I wasn’t with anyone?—”
“I assumed so.” His deep voice commanded me to look at him again. “That’s what trust looks like.”
Everything had been perfect the last two days, but now it all went to shit. “I didn’t mean to offend you?—”
“But you did.”
“We weren’t together. It’s not like you would have been cheating?—”
“Physically together or apart, we’re together as far as I’m concerned.”
“I just want to make it clear I wasn’t accusing you of anything,” I said. “So please stop jumping down my throat.”
He looked away, grabbed his glass, and downed the rest of the contents. He returned it and stared at it a moment longer before he looked at me again. A slow breath moved into his chest and then out again. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
The tightness in my chest evaporated.
“That was a hard time for me. Anytime I think about it…” He looked at the empty wineglass again.
“It’s okay.”
Silence trickled by, and he stared at the open bottle of wine like he was considering pouring another glass, but his mind must have been somewhere else because he didn’t reach for it. “What are your plans for the restaurant?” Maybe he asked because he really wanted the answer, or maybe he just wanted to change the subject.
“Um, I kinda dropped everything this last week. But I signed a lease for that hole-in-the-wall we saw together.”
He looked at me again. “I thought we agreed a bigger place was more suitable.”
“The bank wouldn’t give me a bigger loan than what they offered, so that was all I could afford.”
“We’ll cancel the lease.”
“That’s not how it works. I’m committed for the next year.”
“That’s a problem I can fix.”
“How?”
“Money.”
“Axel, it’s fine. I don’t mind opening a smaller place, and I’d rather not waste money.”
“You’ll waste more money running that little place and expanding later rather than doing it right from the beginning. I really think your food deserves something much grander, something that attracts the wealthy people of this city. That hole-in-the-wall place blends in with everything else on the street. It’s saturated. You need something that stands out.”
“I think it’s fine?—”
“Well, I don’t,” he said. “My family and I own lots of businesses throughout the city, so I know a thing or two about this sort of enterprise. Let me help you.”
My arms crossed over my chest under the water.
“You wouldn’t have signed that lease if things had been different.”
If my father hadn’t sabotaged my life.
He never actually said the words, but it was clear in his gaze.
I stared at the surface of the water because I knew it was coming. Could feel it in the air, the tension that was about to combust out of nothingness.
“Baby—”
“I’m not ready.” I swallowed, feeling the burn in the roof of my mouth.
He stared at me in silence, his eyes flicking back and forth between mine as the seconds ticked by. He inhaled a slow breath. “I’m sorry, but you need to face it. As much as I’ve enjoyed this honeymoon, we have to get back to reality.”
I locked my gaze on the water, fighting back the anguish that started to flood my veins. “I can’t.”
“You can,” he said gently. “I’m here with you.”
I closed my eyes for a moment before I lifted my stare.
His gaze was patient. Loving. Kind.
“I know how hard this is for you,” he whispered. “I wish…I wish it weren’t true.”
I inhaled a shaky breath, steeling my resolve so I wouldn’t raise the water level with a bucket of fresh tears.
“You have to act normal. Act like you didn’t overhear that conversation. Act like I didn’t tell you the truth.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I asked incredulously. “You expect me to pull that off?”
“You have to pull it off.”
I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to look my father in the eye again. Not after I knew the depths of his corruption. The depths of his horrible actions. “I can’t believe this.” My fingers slid over my mouth and cupped my lips for a second, steadying them so they wouldn’t tremble. My hand returned to the warm water. “I told my father I wanted to be with you, and he still let it happen. And then I told him how miserable I was and I loved you, and he still didn’t tell me the truth. He let me believe you really betrayed me.”
“He said you would never speak to him again if you knew the truth, so he could never tell you.”
“And he’s damn right.” My eyes dropped to the water again, feeling the tears coming on. “He took you away from me. He forced you to break my heart. He shot your father in the arm. He… Who knows what else he’s done.”
“Tried to set you up with Theo because he preferred him to me.”
I hadn’t believed that at first, but now it seemed entirely plausible. “I—I don’t even know him. I’m not sure I ever did.” I thought back to our conversations. He said I deserved a man who gave me the world, who opened doors for me, who loved me with his full heart. Axel was that man, but that wasn’t the man my father wanted. The back of my head rested against the edge of the tub, and I looked toward the ceiling, feeling the tears singe the corners of my eyes. They started to drip and run down my cheeks, warm against my skin.
“Baby…”
“I can’t believe he would do that to me.”
“Baby.” He moved across the tub to me and hooked his arms around my body before he dragged me through the water to his chest. He pulled me close and locked his arms around me like steel bars of a cage. His chest was warm, like an underwater furnace.
It was the most comfortable I’d ever been, but it still wasn’t enough.
“You have me.” His face pressed into the crook of my neck. “You’ve always had me.”