CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Riley — 19 years old
Grayson’s betrayal pained me.
But I think what truly shattered me was the day I stopped receiving his yellow lilies.
Even when we were apart, Grayson made sure I never went a day without them. A gift from him to me. The day I moved here, he had contacted the local flower shop near me, and paid them extra to deliver a single yellow lily to me every.single.day. Not one day was ever missed.
His phone call and cruel words left me bleeding from the inside.
But the next day, when I waited for that yellow lily…and it never came, that’s when true anguish set in. That’s when I knew it was really over. I waited by the door, for that familiar knock. I waited a whole day, and when it was finally nightfall, that’s when my soul sank into utter despair. Everything felt so final. The reality of my heartbreak hit me and I crashed into violent agony.
Loving Grayson Hale was my death throes.
I just never thought I’d see this day. For the longest time, I’d wrapped myself into the fantasy of love and romance, thinking this was my forever. My happy ending.
God, I had been so fucking blind.
Two weeks have gone by since the night he broke my heart. I tried calling Grayson multiple times, wanting an explanation and needing to vent my anger. A part of me wants to beg him to love me again.
But he never picked up any of my calls.
He completely shut me out, as if I never existed in his life. As if he had only been a ghost in mine. A mere illusion I created to deceive myself.
But oh, it was such a sweet deception.
His words still echo in my ears, and I wonder how much truth there is in them. Had I really been so foolish? So desperate to be loved that I fabricated the Grayson I love in my head? He said I saw and believed what I wanted to see…
But I simply saw what he showed me.
“It’s not my fault that you fell for someone who was not real. It was your own damn delusion and you recklessly got your heart involved.”
Was everything…fake, and I was too blind to see it? Who is the real Grayson then?
I am so confused and Grayson had refused to give me closure. Now I’m left hanging on to the broken threads of my love and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to move on.
I know Lila is extremely concerned about me and I hate that I’m giving her trouble. I hate that Grayson walked into my life, only to leave behind a hurricane of heartbreak. And now I’m forced to pick up the pieces.
Grayson was the warmth I craved and the safety I needed…
But now the mere thought of his name brings me misery.
I seem to always end up attracting the wrong guys. First Jasper. Then Grayson.
And now there’s him.
Colton Bennett has been following me around like my goddamn shadow.
“Can you stop doing that?” I growl, walking into the library. My shift starts in five minutes. Spinning around on my heels, I turn to face him and cross my arms over my chest.
Colton is wearing dark jeans and a black sweater. His brown hair is messy, as if he has been constantly raking his fingers through it. His brow shoots up. “Doing what?” he asks, feigning innocence, but I’m not falling for that.
Colton is anything but innocent. He’s the devil’s spawn.
“Following me!” I throw my hands in the air. He’s being too obvious.
“And why would I do that? Follow you, I mean.”
I don’t know why Lila told him to ‘take care’ of me, as if I need a damn babysitter. I was heartbroken, not a sick child who needed constant supervision. What even possessed her to suggest such a thing?
I know she’s worried…
Rightfully so.
Because I almost fell back into bad habits two weeks ago. I guess a broken heart was another trigger I didn’t know I had. I didn’t realize what was happening to me when I was binge-eating. It wasn’t until after I had finished purging when realization dawned on me.
That’s when I had my breakdown.
I remember crumbling into Lila’s arms, sobbing and begging her to help me. To make it stop. Telling her that I couldn’t bear to go back to that Riley. The me who used her eating disorder to cope with the damage of her heart. I couldn’t go back to an unhealthy Riley.
I almost relapsed, barely hanging onto the threads of my fragile sanity. Maybe if it wasn’t for Lila, I would have fallen back into that miserable void of self-destruction.
And now I have Colton, who just won’t leave me alone.
Lila and Maddox are back home in Manhattan. Lila’s grandmother has been hospitalized after a sudden stroke. So she’s there to take care of her grandma and Maddox, of course, is with her. They won’t be coming back for another two weeks.
Which means…that leaves me alone with Colton Bennett. I don’t know what Lila told him and why he’s acting so unbearably nice all of a sudden, but it’s frustrating. I rather like Colton as a jerk, than this version of him.
Because if he starts being nice to me, I can’t hold a grudge against him anymore. And I don’t want to like him. Not after everything he’s put me through. Not after all the cruel, taunting words he has said to me.
“You’re in a library,” I deadpan. Is he really going to act oblivious? “Why are you here?”
Colton looks around, as if he’s seeing the place for the first time, and then nods. “Ah yes. In a library. I’m here to read. That’s what people do in libraries, Riley. Also, I need a library card. Could you register me?”
“You don’t read,” I hiss.
“Says who?” Colton frowns, looking quite offended at my statement. “I am an intellectual person who appreciates any kind of literature. Why are you always so angry, anyway?”
I scowl at him.
He smirks.
Ugh! I don’t have time to deal with his bullshit. I stomp over to the counter and quickly register his name into the system. “Your ID.”
He passes me his ID card and I finish his registration. I hand him his brand-new library card and wait for him to leave. Only he doesn’t leave. Colton stands there, staring at me. Still grinning. I’m not exactly a violent person, but I want to smack that grin off his face. What the hell is wrong with him? He’s quite literally insane, I think.
“You’re annoyed,” he finally claims.
My fists clench and I glare at him. “Anything else, Mr. Bennett?”
He slowly cocks his head to the side. “Be right back.”
With a frustrated sigh, I watch him disappear between the shelves and then a minute later, he’s back at the counter. Colton hands me a thick book. “I’ll borrow this.”
I take the book from him. It’s an autobiography, written by an author in 1893. “This?” I question, incredulously. It’s one of those books that stays on the shelves forever. No one ever borrows them and they just sit there, collecting dust.
“Yes, this. Is there a problem?”
My brow shoots up and I shrug. “Nope.” I scan the barcode and write the date onto the slip of paper inside the cover. “There you go. Happy reading.”
He takes his book and simply nods. And then he’s gone.
Good riddance.
I slump against the counter, letting out a heavy exhale. My gaze sweeps over the counter and the scattered papers. I guess I should start cleaning up.
I’m stacking the papers in order when my eyes catch sight of something familiar. My heart stammers and I blink, confused.
A mint candy. The one I specifically like. The one that Lila carries with her all the time.
The same candy that Colton left on my nightstand yesterday.
A candy that was most definitely not on the counter when I got here.
My head snaps up, looking toward the exit, but Colton has already disappeared.
Why…?
Why is he doing this? What is the purpose behind his…sudden kindness? It doesn’t make sense. He confuses me.
Is it pity from him? Or is this all just a game to Colton Bennett?