Chapter 45
MARK
I drum my fingers against the small kitchen table. I pick up my phone and then put it down. What in the hell I’m supposed to do with myself?
I’ve already called the dealership and purchased a brand-new, fully loaded F-150. I’ve talked to my trainer, and he’s working on finding a gym and making travel plans. Now, I can only sit here and wait for Lex and Cal to get back from picking Bree up from school.
I wanted to go, but Lex thought it was best we didn’t ambush her and at least give her the ride home to know I’m here. Although, she’s going to walk in here thinking I’m just Lex’s husband.
Nerves and me don’t mix well, and I’ve had enough. My skin feels too tight.
What if she hates me? Or she doesn’t think I’m funny? Or can’t stand my hyper-spontaneous tendencies? What if she doesn’t want me to help take care of her? What if she’s angry I wasn’t here for her?
I pound my fist on the table, then pick up my phone and call Shane.
“Finally, get your head out of your ass?”
“I’m about to lose my damn mind, so if you could take it easy on the shit-giving for the moment, that would be nice.”
“What’s wrong with you?”
Given my state, I’m down for cutting to the chase. “I’m probably ten minutes away from meeting my sister.”
Silence. The one who always has something to grumble says nothing.
“Yo, you’re supposed to say something reassuring here. You deal with an army of kids every day. What am I supposed to say to her? ”
He clears his throat. “So, you’re in Ohio?”
“Shit, Shane. Catch up, please. Quickly. Lex went to get her from school, and they’ll be here any minute.”
“Just calm your high-strung ass down, or you’re gonna need a sedative.” He lets out a breath as if somehow its relaxing effect will be infused into me. “You’re great with kids. They cling to you like you’re the sugar high they’ve longed for.”
“But this is different.” I try to think why it’s different. “She’s my sister. I need her to like me. There’s pressure. I’ve never cared if kids like me. They just do.” My knee starts bouncing. “But this one. What if she thinks I’m high-maintenance?”
“You are.”
“What if she hates football or thinks I’m uncool or a complete imbecile? What if she’s really smart like Garrett, and I can’t keep up? Or she doesn’t take to me like Liv latched on to you right away? What if it takes years before she sees how cool and fun and smart I really am?”
I take a breath.
“Jeez, Mark.”
“I know.” I rest my head in my hand. “I need her to want me to take care of her.” This is the truth of it, and what if she doesn’t? What if she doesn’t want me to be a part of her life?
“Is that what you want?” His blunt question strikes.
I don’t have to think about it. “Yes. I don’t know her, but . . . I want to give her what I didn’t have. I understand more than ever why you did what you did for Maggie and the kids.”
“How old is she?” I’m certain Shane is rubbing his temples, trying to sort out my meltdown.
“Nine. She’ll be ten soon.”
He sighs, likely thinking about his family. “Just be yourself. Not the hyped-up life is grand guy. Be you. She’ll love you. And show her that she can count on you no matter what. She needs to trust you. One hundred percent. All the time.”
I think about it. I can do that.
“What’s happening there?” He pauses, and I know what he’s asking.
“Her court date is coming up. There’s a stack of charges. It doesn’t look good for her.”
Shane grunts .
“She doesn’t want me to be Bree’s guardian.”
“She shouldn’t get a say. What’s the social worker say?”
“Wait for the court date. You know how this goes.”
“What are you doing about it?”
Shane asks the question I’ve been wondering all damn day. There’s a lot at stake here, and the main thing is Bree’s life and safety.
“I need Maggie’s lawyer’s number. I could use some advice.”
“Yeah. I’ll get it to you.” He’s quiet for a second before he clears his throat. “You need to get her to change her mind.”
I pull in air and let it out, hearing him say the exact thing I don’t want to hear. I don’t want to see my mother. I don’t want to face or ever ask her for a single thing.
“This isn’t about you anymore. You have a little girl who, from the moment she walks in that door and knows you’re someone important to her, will rely on you to protect her and put her first. That is what you have to do. It’s what you’re doing for those babies.”
“You know what that means.”
“Sure do. And you can handle it. You are the best damn quarterback in the NFL. You’ve fought, overcome, and accomplished things little boys and grown men all over the world dream of doing.” He pauses. “Get your ass in there and tell her where to sign. You’re not asking.”
He makes it sound so simple.
“Who knows? Maybe it’ll help relieve some of the anger, too.”
I’m not sure that’s possible. “Don’t let me forget to put a word in for you when Dr. Phil retires.”
“Hang in there. You’re gonna do just fine with this kid and those babies. When it all settles, bring her out. These kids will show her how to really make you lose your damn mind.”
Bree, meeting my family sounds like too much to hope for at the moment.
“Thanks. I’ll let you know how it goes.”
I hang up just in time to hear a truck door. I stand, and then I sit back down.
Cool. Just be cool. I am cool. I’m the best quarterback in the NFL. What nine year old girl wouldn’t think that’s awesome? Shit. Probably all of them .
I swipe a hand over my face and pick up my phone, pretending I’m busy. The back door pushes open. Lex steps in, holding a purple backpack blasted with flowers.
Right behind her comes a girl. Her long, dark hair is in low pigtails that hang over her shoulders. She’s skinny, her skin tan, but when her eyes hit mine, they’re a reflection of my own.
She steps inside, only far enough for Lex to close the door. She stares at me, tucking her chin like she’s nervous, too.
“Grandpa had to head into the shop for a bit.” Lex breaks the ice, hanging Bree’s backpack on a chair. “I told him the three of us would figure out something for dinner.”
Lex makes wide eyes at me, probably to tell me to quit being a freak and staring, but she looks like me. It’s the craziest damn thing.
“Sooo, Bree,” Lex says slowly. “This weirdo is Mark.”
Bree’s shy mode cracks, and she giggles softly. The sound instantly has my nerves retreating to a more normal level.
“How was school?” I ask like a complete moron, and out of the corner of my eye, I see Lex trying to hold in a laugh. I want to hide behind her and make her talk this child into liking me.
“Ok.”
“How about a snack? I think Mark needs sugar. He’s looking a little catatonic.” Lex pulls open the fridge door, an amused smirk riding across her lips as she peeks inside.
I pull out a chair for Bree, and she slides into it. “Any visits to the principal’s office today?” Her eyes go wide, and I force a smile, trying for my best one.
Her lips curve upward as well when she sees I’m teasing. “No, but Brent did, and Mrs. Lawson had to help another teacher with a kid who shoved an eraser up his nose.”
I laugh. “I would’ve shoved a jar of pepper at him and waited until that sucker came blasting out. It would’ve been like a booger rocket.”
Bree falls forward in a fit of laughter. “Eww. That would be so gross. It’d have snot all over it.”
“Well, make sure you don’t cheat off him. He’s clearly not the brightest crayon in the box.”
“I don’t cheat. I don’t have to. ”
I rest back in the chair, crossing my arms over my chest. “No? You’re smart, then? I used to cheat off that one all the time.” I point at Lex. “She’s crazy smart.”
Bree glances at Lex as she rolls her eyes.
“You knew Alex when you were little.”
I shake my head. “Not when I was little, but when we were in high school. I liked her a lot, and she wouldn’t talk to me.”
“She likes you now,” she sings.
“She can’t get enough of me now.” I raise and lower my eyebrows.
Bree laughs as Lex pulls out a chair and places a plate with a sliced apple and some pretzels on the table. “I tolerate you,” she says, taking a seat.
“Ha. Is that what you call it?” I wink at her, happy to be crawling back into my own skin.
Bree grabs a pretzel and breaks a piece off before popping it in her mouth.
Lex pushes one of Bree’s pigtails over her shoulder, breaking the silence. “Mark and I need to talk to you about something.”
Bree sits taller in her seat. “Is it about my mom?”
“Kind of,” Lex says softly, and I knew it before, but I can see it fully now. She’s going to be the most amazing mom. My heart squeezes in my chest.
I rest my elbows on the table. “You want to know something totally crazy.” I cut in, finding my voice. She nods. “You and I are related.” Her small brow wrinkles. “We’re . . . brother and sister. Your mom had me many years before she had you.”
Her eyes flick between Lex and me. “That makes no sense to me. You’re my brother? But . . . you’re old.”
I pretend to stab myself in the center of my chest. “Ugh, I’m not that old.”
“I don’t know. You’re starting to get a few wrinkles and a couple of gray hairs.” Lex jabs, trying to keep things light.
Bree doesn’t play along but stares at me.
I take it back down. “I know this is strange, and I’m sure you have lots of questions, but I want you to know I’m stoked to have a sister.”
“How come I didn’t know about you before?” She’s still frowning.
I scratch my jaw. “Well, that’s a really long story, but the short of it is, I couldn’t live with our mom when I was young. She . . . needed to get help just like she does now, and couldn’t take care of me.” I try to be as gentle as possible. “By the time she got better, I’d already moved away.”
Her eyes move to the table while she thinks about what I said.
I cut into her thoughts, wanting to make sure she knows that isn’t going to happen to her. “I was thinking I’d stay here with you guys for a while, and we can get to know each other.”
She bites the corner of her lip. “Alex said you have to travel a lot for work.”
“I do, but not right now.” I hesitate and then continue. “I’m looking for a new team.”
“She said you play football.”
“I do.” I lean closer to her. “I’m pretty good, too.” I hope for a smile, but she’s still processing.
“You mean, you’re like one of those players on TV?” One side of her face scrunches up, and it makes me smile.
“I am.”
Her face brightens. “Mom watched football when we had cable. She really likes the Liberties.” I nod because there’s nothing else I can do. I’m not letting that little tidbit of information touch me. “What happens when you start with a new team?” She looks at Lex instead of me. “Will you leave then?”
Lex puts her arm around her. “We’ll have to figure things out as we go. We’re hoping you can help us.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Plus, these babies aren’t going to stay in here much longer. So the three of us have lots of work to do.”
I watch Bree lean into her and see the bond that they have. A small wave of anger flares for not being here, but I’m really glad I get to be now.
“Good thing your shower is soon. You need lots of stuff,” Bree says, taking an apple slice.
I groan. “Don’t get her started on baby stuff, or she’ll go into meltdown mode.”
Bree smiles.
Lex leans back in her chair, her eyes meeting mine. Somehow, it’s going to work out. It has to. This right here . . . is my family. All four of them .
“Can you come watch me at dance tonight?” Bree’s bright eyes peer up at me.
“Uh . . . I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Lex cuts in and Bree frowns. “See, the thing about your brother, he’s kind of a big deal to a lot of people, and if we’re not careful, it causes a scene. Plus, his head expands three times its normal size.”
I raise and lower one shoulder. “Hey. I’m a likable guy and good at what I do. People love me.”
Lex points at me as Bree grins. “See, big head, but when he goes places, people tend to surround him, but he’ll drive us. Ok?”
“Wait.” Bree holds out her hand, revealing her chipped fingernail polish. “You’re like . . . famous.”
I smirk. “Bree, I’m super famous.”
She grins, and it reaches her eyes. “This is incredible. I have a brother, and you’re famous.” Her hands cover her mouth. “I can’t wait to tell my friends.”
I lean forward. “Bree. You and I are going to get along just fine.”
She giggles as Lex groans, and that only makes her laugh more.
“All right, you two,” Lex says, but there’s love in her eyes. “What are we having for dinner? We have to eat early so we can get you to dance.”
I rest back while they discuss dinner. I know what I have to do and who I need to see to make it happen.