Chapter 1 #2
Slowly, Rissa sat up straight, smoothing a hand over her hair. “I’m sorry. That was pretty awkward.”
“Very,” I agreed.
“You don’t have to tell me I’m acting like a crazy-ass, paranoid teenager.”
“Glad you know that.”
“It’s embarrassing really.”
“Why do you care if Gemma saw us?”
“I’m just not ready for everyone to know about us.”
I studied her silently for a moment. “Are you ashamed?”
“No,” she said. “Of course not.”
“What is it?”
“It’s just . . .” She bit down on her bottom lip. “It’s not like we’ve defined what, and who, we are to each other. Why go public when we’re not sure what we’re doing?”
I understood that. But . . . “What are we doing?”
She shrugged. “Having fun.”
“Is that it?” I couldn’t mask the annoyance in my tone, which frustrated me even more. “I mean, I’ve been to work functions, you’ve visited me at work . . .”
“Yeah, but it’s just us in those places, Asa. We don’t have to explain anything.”
I twisted my bottle of beer. “Whatever, Rissa.”
“Don’t be mad,” she said, resting her chin on my shoulder. “I promise it has nothing to do with me being ashamed of you.”
“Or me being younger than you, right?”
Frowning, she shook her head. “No. I don’t care about that.”
For some reason, I didn’t believe her and that sucked. I took a long gulp of beer and set the bottle on the table. “Fine.”
“I should probably go to the bathroom.” She slid out of the booth and dashed around the corner quickly, careful not to make too much noise.
Seconds later, I heard a gasp. “Asa?!”
I glanced up, surprised to see Gemma standing there, her hand on her hip. “What up, doe?”
“What the fuck? You’re here. I thought you were busy tonight?”
Scanning the restaurant for Rissa, I made up an excuse. “I needed to eat.”
“Wow, I’m so glad you’re here.” She called her friend over. “I wanted you to meet somebody special.”
My phone buzzed on the table. Peering at the screen, I noticed the text from Rissa. “Okay,” I said absently, reading the message.
Rissa
I snuck out the back. I’ll call you.
Rissa
Don’t forget my cauliflower.
This couldn’t be real. Because I was in uncharted territory.
In my thirty-three, almost thirty-four years of life, I’d never let a woman give me the flux like this.
Not even Tameka Powell in high school put me through this shit.
Even after she dumped me right before prom for her ex-boyfriend, I didn’t even give a fuck.
I went to prom by my damn self and took somebody else’s date home.
With zero regret. And now I was twisted up in knots over my big sister’s best friend, the same woman I’d just made come minutes earlier, the same woman who’d just walked out on me like I wasn’t shit to her.
I didn’t like it.
I hated it.
“Asa, this is Karma,” Gemma said with a proud grin. “We’re getting married.”
“We’re getting married!”
I stared at Gemma as she went on and on about Karma. The way they met, the first time they went on a date, her preferred pronouns, and the reason she thought this was it for her.
It wasn’t the first time she’d announced an engagement, so I struggled to find the appropriate cautious but concerned tone. Especially in front of mixed company.
“Asa?” she called, waving a hand in my face.
I blinked myself out of my thoughts. “Wow,” was all I got out.
“Aren’t you happy for me?”
My gaze drifted to the person sitting next to her. Gemma proclaimed that Karma was the true “the love of her life”. But I couldn’t muster up congratulations because this whole thing felt like some twisted sort of Karma. Pun intended.
In the short time they’d been at my table, Karma had barely said anything. Other than her drink order, she’d only given one-word answers to any questions.
How are you?
Good.
Where do you live?
Here.
What do you do?
Everything.
By the time the waitress set my bourbon on the table, replacing the beer I’d already finished, I was ready to down the contents in one gulp.
It had been a long day, one of those days that couldn’t be over fast enough, one of those days where the only suitable ending was my dick in someone’s mouth or my face buried between someone’s legs.
But after Rissa dipped, I wasn’t confident that would happen. Or even if I wanted it to.
“Asa?” Gemma called out again, her voice sharp, tense.
I met her gaze. “Huh?”
“Are you okay?”
I leaned back against the booth. “I’m fine. When’s the wedding?”
“We wanted to wait until Ezra was one. I want him to walk me down the aisle.” She beamed. “I thought it would be so cute.”
Six months ago, Gemma had given birth to a son, Ezra Jamel Byrd.
She’d given him my middle name as a “tribute” to our unconditional friendship.
I didn’t argue with her, even though I thought it was a bad idea.
But seeing her with her baby, watching her body the important role of mother, made me happy.
Because that smile on her face once she finally held him in her arms was something I never thought I’d see again after she lost her parents.
“Yeah, that would be cool,” I agreed.
“Karma wants to adopt him.”
My eyes flashed to her. “What?”
“I know.” She kissed Karma. “I can’t wait to start our lives together.”
I leaned forward, resting my elbows on the table. “As long as you’re happy.”
Tears welled in her eyes. She reached out and squeezed my hand. “I am.”
I flipped my palm, gripping her hand. “That’s all I ever wanted for you.”
“I really think this is meant to be. Karma is an esotericist. She’s super spiritual.
Since I met her, she’s opened my mind. I’ve been reading and allowing myself to believe in what can’t be seen.
So I know it was no coincidence that we saw you here today.
” She glanced around the restaurant. “Were you here with someone?”
“Nah,” I lied. “Just me.”
The server arrived with a pizza and that plate of fried cauliflower and set it in front of me. I thanked him, eyeing the food with disinterest.
“You ordered cauliflower?” Gemma asked incredulously. “Last I checked, you hated that shit.”
Still do. “Thought I’d try something new,” I murmured.
Gemma swiped a piece from the plate and bit into it. “This is good.”
I pushed the plate toward her. “Have at it.”
As she happily ate Rissa’s food, I watched Karma. The other woman was too quiet, and I never trusted anyone who couldn’t string together a complete sentence.
“How’s the baby?” I asked.
Gemma pulled out her phone and showed me the latest pic. “He’s so perfect, Asa. I can’t even believe he’s mine.”
I smiled at the baby’s chubby cheeks and chunky legs. “He’s getting big.”
“I call him Chunk.” She giggled. “I just want to bite his legs all the time. And those cheeks. So plump and soft. I kiss him at least twenty times a day.”
“That’s what you’re supposed to do.”
“Right?”
“Has Ana been to see him?”
She nodded, popping another piece of cauliflower in her mouth. “They were here last month. She was a huge help.”
“Good.”
“Your mother came to see him too when she visited Paityn a couple of weeks ago.”
“She told me.”
“Mama Vicki is the best. She brought so much shit to the house. Diapers, onesies, little socks, pacifiers, a swing, one of those little bouncy things . . . I need a third bedroom just to fit everything her and Ana gave me.”
I chuckled. “That sounds like her.”
“I’m grateful, though. I need all the help I can get.”
“How’s work? Did you go back yet?”
Gemma worked in tech. She was a Network Engineer. She made good money and had a flexible, remote schedule. Which helped now that she had to take care of Ezra.
“I’m back at work. I’m just glad I don’t need to take him to daycare. I don’t know if I would’ve been able to do it. He’s still so little. He can’t talk or tell me if someone is being shady.”
My phone buzzed again. I glanced at the screen.
Rissa
Are you still there?
Instead of replying, I turned my phone over, and forced my attention back to Gemma.
“Who was that?” she asked, eyeing my phone.
“Nobody.”
Gemma stared at me, studying me. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m good. Are you?”
“I already told you.” She winced a little. “My back is kind of hurting though. I think I slept wrong or something.”
“Is the baby sleeping in the bed with you?”
She smiled. “I promise I’m going to put him in the crib soon. Karma moved in last week and—”
“Already?” I interrupted.
Her shoulders fell. “Bro. Come on.”
“Fine,” I relented. “Go ahead.”
“Anyway,” she continued with a hard roll of her eyes. “She’s been on me to start letting him sleep in there for at least a few hours per night.”
I looked at Karma. “Do you have kids?”
“No,” Karma said.
“O-kay,” I muttered, dryly.
“But she’s good with Ezra,” Gemma added. “She rocks him to sleep at night, plays with him sometimes while I’m in meetings.”
“That’s . . . something.”
“Babe, they’re bringing our food,” Karma whispered.
Finally. At least, I knew the woman could say more than yes or no. “You better go then,” I suggested.
Gemma grinned at Karma. “Can you give us a minute?” After Karma left, she glared at me. “Why are you so mean?”
I sighed. “I’m making sure you’re good. That’s all.”
“I love her,” she said. “She’s an amazing person. Once you get to know her, you’ll love her.”
I doubt that. “It’s too soon to know you want to marry her. You just met her two months ago.”
“Love has no timetable. Look at your parents. They met and married within a year.”
“In 1981. Times have changed.”
“Not that much. Love is love, and I fell hard and fast”
“Does she have a real job? I’m not one to knock a hustle, but is she making enough reading tarot cards to support herself?”
“She’s been at the hospital for thirty years.”
“Thirty years?” I whispered. “How old is she?”
Gemma flashed a wobbly smile. “Fifty-one.”
I blinked.
Cracking up, she squeezed my hands. “Can’t you just be happy for me?”
“I’ll be happy when she can hold a conversation.”
“Says the man who hates to talk.”
“But I do talk,” I argued. “That’s the difference.”
“She’s just quiet. She talks, though. To me.”