Chapter Twenty
No Holding Back
Emma
T he door clicks shut behind Ethan, and the quiet of the room feels heavy, electric, like the air before a storm. I barely have a second to register what’s happening before his lips crash against mine, stealing my breath and every coherent thought in my head.
The kiss is fiery, desperate, a culmination of years of longing and unspoken words. His hands frame my face, his thumbs brushing against my jaw as he holds me like I might disappear if he lets go. I clutch at his hoodie, my fingers curling into the soft fabric as I kiss him back with everything I have.
When he finally pulls away, we’re both breathing hard, our foreheads resting together as if the space between us might break the fragile moment. His hands slide down to my waist, anchoring me against him, and his breath is warm against my lips when he speaks .
“Emma,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough, laced with need and something deeper. “If you don’t want this, you need to tell me now. Because I’m barely holding on.”
I swallow hard, my lips parting as I try to form words. But I can’t. Not when he’s looking at me like that, not when my entire body is screaming for him. Instead, I lean closer, my trembling hand brushing against his chest. The soft cotton of his hoodie is warm under my palm, and I can feel the steady thrum of his heart beating beneath my touch.
“I don’t want you to stop,” I whisper, the words trembling out of me like a confession, my voice barely audible over the pounding in my chest.
That’s all it takes to break him.
He moves faster than I can blink, his hands gripping my waist as he pulls me flush against him with no space between us. His mouth crashes into mine, hot and demanding, and I gasp at the sheer intensity of it. His lips are soft but insistent, his kiss a claim, a promise, and a plea all rolled into one.
I let out a soft moan, my hands sliding up to tangle in his hair as I kiss him back with everything I have. It’s messy and desperate, like we’re trying to make up for years of holding back. His teeth graze my bottom lip, and I gasp, giving him the opening he needs to deepen the kiss.
His tongue sweeps into my mouth, and my knees nearly buckle at the sensation. Mint lingers on his lips, mixed with something unmistakably him…of home. And I can’t get enough.
“God, Emma,” he groans against my lips, his hands sliding down to grip the backs of my thighs. “I’ve waited so fucking long for this.”
Before I can process his words, he lifts me effortlessly, and my legs instinctively wrap around his waist. He spins us around with my back against the door. The frame digs into my back, but I barely notice, too caught up in the way his body feels pressed against mine.
“Say it,” he murmurs, his lips brushing along my jaw, grazing the sensitive spot just below my ear. His breath is hot against my skin, and I shiver at the low, commanding tone in his voice. “Tell me you want this. Tell me you want me.”
“Yes,” I breathe, my voice shaky but certain. “I want you, Ethan. I’ve always wanted you. I never stopped.”
A deep, guttural sound rumbles from his chest, and he pulls back just enough to meet my gaze. His eyes are blazing, filled with something raw and feral that sends a thrill racing through me.
“You’re mine,” he growls, his voice thick with possession. “You’ve always been mine, Emma. And I’m going to prove it to you. ”
Before I can respond, he’s moving again, carrying me across the room like I weigh nothing. My back hits the soft mattress, and he follows me down, his body caging me in as his lips find mine again. His hands are everywhere—tracing the curve of my waist, sliding up my thighs, tangling in my hair.
“Fuck, you’re perfect,” he murmurs against my lips, his hands slipping under the hem of my shirt. His fingers are warm against my skin, sending sparks of electricity racing through me as he pushes the fabric up and over my head.
His eyes darken as they roam over me, lingering on the lacy bra I’d thrown on this morning without a second thought. He leans down, his lips brushing against the swell of my breast as his hands glide down to the waistband of my sleep shorts.
“All this time, and you’re still this perfect?” he murmurs, his voice low and teasing. “That’s just cruel, baby.”
I let out a breathless laugh, my head falling back against the pillow as his hands slide into my sleep shorts. “You’re making it impossible to think right now.”
His gaze snaps up to mine, his intensity stealing the air from my lungs. “Good,” he says, his voice low and commanding as he hooks his fingers under the fabric and pulls them down in one swift motion. “Because tonight, I’m all yours. ”
I shiver as the cool air hits my bare skin, but the warmth of his body is quick to follow. His lips move down my neck, across my collarbone, leaving a path of fire in their wake.
“Ethan,” I gasp as his mouth finds the sensitive spot just below my navel. My hands fist in the sheets, and he glances up at me with a wicked grin.
“I’ve got you, Emma,” he murmurs, his voice dripping with promise. “Just let me take care of you.”
And then he does.
His touch is firm, deliberate, and utterly consuming. His hands grip my thighs, spreading me wider as his mouth works its magic against me. The heat of his tongue drags over my pussy, slow and purposeful, before he circles it with just enough pressure to make my hips lift off the bed.
“Oh, God,” I gasp, my fingers threading into his hair, holding him closer as his mouth moves with a rhythm that drives me insane. His tongue flicks and swirls, alternating between teasing and devouring, and every stroke sends a jolt of pleasure racing through me.
He hums against me, the vibrations shooting straight through my core, and I can’t hold back the moan that escapes me. “Ethan…” His name is a plea, a breathless cry as he grips my thighs tighter, his fingers digging into my skin just enough to anchor me to the moment .
His lips seal around the sensitive bundle of nerves, and his tongue works in precise, unrelenting circles. The intensity builds, every flick and suck sending a cascade of heat through my body. My breaths come faster, my back arching off the bed as his hands slide lower, his thumbs spreading me open to give him better access.
The pressure mounts, unbearable and exquisite, until I’m nothing but a trembling, moaning mess beneath him. “Don’t stop,” I manage to choke out, my voice breaking as his tongue delves deeper, tasting me like I’m the only thing he’s ever wanted.
“Say my name,” he commands, as he pulls back, his voice low and rough, his lips brush against my inner thigh. “I want to hear you say it when I make you come for me.” He then dives back in, his mouth devouring me in the best possible way.
“Ethan,” I cry out, my voice breaking as the tension building inside me finally snaps. The orgasm crashes over me like a tidal wave, starting deep in my core and radiating out in shuddering, uncontrollable waves. My back arches off the bed, my thighs trembling against his grip as the pleasure consumes me, sharp and overwhelming.
His name falls from my lips like a prayer, over and over again, each syllable fractured by the tremors wracking my body. Heat blooms across my skin, my pulse pounding in my ears as every nerve feels alive, hypersensitive to his touch. My fingers tighten in his hair, holding him to me as my body writhes beneath the weight of the orgasm, each pulse of pleasure sending aftershocks through me until I feel on the verge of completely unraveling.
A broken sob escapes me, the intensity leaving me breathless and shaking. My chest heaves as I try to steady myself, but the lingering warmth of his tongue and the firm grip of his hands on my thighs keep me tethered to the high, prolonging the sensation until I’m completely spent.
When I finally come down, I feel him move, his body sliding up mine with deliberate, unhurried intent. His lips brush against my inner thigh, then the curve of my hip, and higher still, leaving a path of warmth in their wake. By the time he reaches my lips, I’m already breathless again, anticipation humming in my veins.
He kisses me deeply, his mouth claiming mine with an intensity that leaves no room for doubt, like he’s trying to fuse us together, to make me feel every ounce of what’s coursing through him. His weight settles over me, grounding and overwhelming all at once, while his hands shift to trace soothing patterns along my sides, his touch gentle but no less consuming.
As he kisses me deeply, his body pressing into mine, I whisper against his lips, “I don’t want this to end.”
His gaze darkens, his thumb brushing softly along my jawline. “I told you,” he murmurs, his voice husky but resolute. “I’m not letting you go again.”
And for the first time in years, I believe him.
Ethan pulls back just enough to look at me, his chest rising and falling with ragged breaths. His hands skim up my sides, his touch deliberate, as he grips the edge of my bra. His gaze meets mine, silently asking for permission, and I nod, my breath hitching.
His hands slip behind me, deftly unclasping the bra and with one smooth motion, he slides it down my arms. His fingers grazing my skin as he tosses it aside before his mouth descends and the lace joins the growing pile of my discarded clothing.
His eyes darken as they roam over me, lingering on the curves he’s just revealed. The intensity in his expression sends a fresh wave of heat through me.
“Fucking perfect,” he murmurs, his voice rough as his lips brush softly against my collarbone. His hands move lower, tracing the curve of my waist before sliding up to cup my breasts, his touch reverent, like he’s savoring every inch of me. The sensation leaves me trembling, completely at his mercy.
Ethan pulls back just enough to look at me, his chest rising and falling with ragged breaths. His hands skim over my sides, his touch deliberate, causing my breath to hitch .
My hands move instinctively to his hoodie, tugging at it, and he shifts back just enough to strip it off, tossing it aside. Beneath it, his shirt clings to the hard lines of his chest, and I don’t wait—I tug it up, desperate to feel his skin against mine. He pulls it over his head in one fluid motion, and I can’t stop the sharp inhale as I take him in.
His chest is broad, his muscles taut and defined, and I run my fingers over his warm skin, following the lines of old scars and ridges. Every inch of him is mesmerizing, raw, and real. My hands drift lower, tracing the dip of his hips as he moves, hinting that I want them off. His jeans join the rest of the clothes on the floor, leaving him in nothing but boxer briefs.
And then those are gone too. My breath catches as I drink him in—raw, unguarded, and utterly beautiful. My heart pounds as my eyes roam over him, unable to focus on one thing because it’s all too much.
“Emma,” he breathes, his voice low and thick with need, as he kneels before me. His hands slide up my thighs, his fingers brushing my bare skin with a deliberate slowness that has my entire body on edge.
He leans down, pressing his forehead to mine. “Do you want this? Do you want me?” he whispers, his voice heavy with both hunger and vulnerability .
“Yes,” I whisper, my voice trembling. “Yes, Ethan. I want all of you.”
His lips curve into a wicked smile, and his voice drops to a low, sinful rasp. “All of me, huh? Careful, baby. Once you’ve had me inside you again, I’ll ruin you for everyone else—and you’re going to love every second of it.”