Chapter Twenty-Two
Rory did not say much on the journey home.
His feelings were too raw, too exposed, and he worried if he said anything, it would be to blurt out the words he had never thought he would say to any woman.
I love you. Because he did love Grace. From thinking he was being kind, to enjoying her company in and out of bed, he had advanced that next step to loving her.
He would never return to the life he had once led, and he did not want to. He could not imagine it. Grace was his life, and tonight the truth had come at him like a runaway horse and carriage, forcing him to see the truth.
What if she didn’t love him? He believed she was fond of him, she liked him, and she was grateful to him. She enjoyed his body. But that didn’t mean she loved him.
His head hurt with all the questions circling around in it until he felt like one of the fighters at Gentleman Jackson’s saloon.
Rory needed to consider his next step, or perhaps talk to Aunt Jennie and Uncle James.
They would know what to do. But he couldn’t help but think he should be able to work this out for himself.
Grace gave him some questioning looks when they arrived home but wished him goodnight with a sweet smile and left him at his bedchamber door. Perhaps she needed time to think too, or perhaps she wanted to check on her sisters.
Rory knew their situation wouldn’t always be this intense.
Prudence and Harriet would grow. They would have their own friends and, eventually, husbands.
They would leave and he and Grace would be alone, together.
He wondered if they might have children of their own, and the thought didn’t frighten him as much as he thought it would.
He tried to imagine a small person in his or Grace’s image, looking up at him as if he knew everything and could do anything.
That was a little less exciting. Rory would have more work to do to be the sort of man who deserved a child’s admiration, but he thought he could do it.
But all of this was dependent upon whether or not Grace wanted to stay by his side, continue to be his wife, and love him as he loved her.
Rory was still mulling over everything when he finally fell asleep.
*
He woke to the sound of voices, but he didn’t think anything of it. These days the house was always full of people. He took some time to wash and dress before he came downstairs. If Jennie had visitors he didn’t want to intrude, so he planned to go out riding for an hour or two.
Instead, as he reached the breakfast room, he was confronted with two people he had not thought to see—or perhaps hoped not to see was more the truth, because he was a coward when it came to confessing to his parents what he had done.
They were seated at the table with Jennie and James, and everyone looked up at him and stared as if he had grown two heads.
“Luna and Maxwell arrived last night,” Jennie explained, her eyes wide. “They wanted to sit up, but I thought it best to wait until this morning.”
Rory should thank her for that. Last night would not have been the best time to be confronted with his disappointed parents.
Although, now he looked more closely, he could see his mother looked more worried than disappointed.
Maxwell . . . well, he definitely appeared to be disappointed, just as he had all of Rory’s life.
No doubt to him this was but another example of his son’s ramshackle ways.
“What are you doing here?” he blurted out.
“Rory, you should have told us.” Luna’s blue eyes were wet with tears. “To let us find out through our neighbor, Sir Hector! We were so embarrassed when he showed us the notice in The Times. We had to pretend we already knew.”
“Aye, we weren’t about to give the auld clootie the satisfaction,” Maxwell growled.
Rory blinked. Who would have thought Hector even subscribed to The Times? He was such a rampant supporter of all things Scottish.
“He took great pleasure in reading out the piece in the newspaper to your mother,” his father said gruffly. “You could have saved her that.”
“I’m sorry,” Rory said, a lump in his throat when he saw his mother wipe her eyes. “I didn’t realize it was something I would ever need to tell you. I thought it was temporary and everything would soon return to normal.”
He heard a choke of laughter and noticed Aunt Jennie and Uncle James exchanging an amused look. “What he says is true,” Jennie spoke up. “As I told you last night, Maxwell, Rory really did believe he would return to his former carefree existence once he had Grace settled.”
Luna’s face darkened. “Did she not let him then? I want a word with this lassie.”
“No,” Jennie said firmly, “it wasn’t Grace’s doing, sister. Rory changed his mind.” She raised her eyebrows, a sign he should carry on.
Rory nodded. “I did. I fell in love with her,” he said, and the words felt strange in his mouth and yet also very right. “She is everything to me. I love Grace, and now I don’t want her to go.”
There was a long silence. He had rendered his parents speechless. Then he heard a sound behind him, a soft gasp, and with his heart jumping in his chest, he turned his head.
Grace was standing in the doorway, her expression amazed and her eyes wide as she stared at him.
Rory supposed he could make a joke, or decide he had an urgent appointment with his horse, but he knew that would be cowardly. He had to tell his wife the truth, even if she did not love him, because he could not hold the words in any longer.
“Grace,” he said. “Wife.”
She came toward him, her eyes on his face. If she knew his parents were watching, then she had forgotten, or maybe they had ceased to exist in this world where there was just Rory and Grace.
“Did you mean it?” she asked, her voice trembling on the edge of hope. Here was the woman who had never felt special to her father or to her treacherous lover. “Do you love me? Are you going to—to keep me, Rory?”
He heard Luna make a sound at her words, and Rory’s own heart ached when he thought of what Grace’s life had been like, and how much he wanted to make it better from now on.
“My dear lass,” he said roughly, “I plan to keep you until we are both old and grey. If you will have me?”
“Yes, I will have you,” she said, and flung herself into his arms. “Oh yes, please!”
Rory held her tight, and it was only a little later, when he looked up, that he realized his whole family were crying tears of happiness.