Chapter Four #2
I can see in my peripheral that he’s stopped running around me. Glancing up, I find him sitting up straight in place, like he does when he’s waiting for his food, or a treat.
I can’t help but chuckle. “You wanna help Daddy, huh?”
He barks.
“Okay…” I fold my arms over my chest. “Well, what’s your advice, smart guy?”
He tilts his head.
“I’m worried about our friends. I mean, shit, I haven’t talked to Luthor, Ren, or Byron in fucking months.”
Sobaka whines and lies down with his chin on the floor.
“I know, right??” I begin pacing again. “And I know it’s because the new guards are there… Joy wouldn’t say it outright, but I think they split them all up. Which sucks ass on its own. Luthor and Ren being split up is fucked. Byron too?? That’s a low fuckin blow…”
This time, Dog isn’t chasing me. He’s just watching me strut back and forth. Listening intently, as he does.
“And to top it all off, now we can’t reach Joy either!
” I scrub a hand over my face. “Her phone is like, disconnected or something. After a storm?? With The Ivory all pissed off and kicking them out of their home?! I don’t know what to do, but I feel awful, and I can’t just sit around here, in goddamn paradise, all happy with the love of my life while the people I care about are potentially hurt or struggling. ”
Finally, I stop to take a much-needed breath. Peeking down at him, I ask sincerely, “So, what do you think? What should I… do?”
Sobaka whimpers again, then stands up, slinking over to me. He butts his head against my hand, rubbing himself on my legs. I pout, scratching behind his ears.
“I think you’re right, kid,” I tell him softly. “It’s the only option…”
“Fiancé? Fur son??” Kemper hollers from the front door as he returns from wherever he was.
Honestly, I’ve been so distracted, I completely forgot where he said he was going today.
“In here,” I reply nervously, shooting a look at Dog. “He’s gonna be so mad…”
Kemper stomps into the room, all tall and gorgeous and huge, looking every bit like my fucking soulmate. My partner, my protector; the person who’s made it his life’s mission to ease my mind and awaken my body.
And he definitely does those things, with his actions, yes, but also just by existing. Even being in his presence settles me. Like my molecules know it’s all good, so long as Kellan is around.
“I got everything to make your favorite dinner.” He smiles at me, and I return it, wistfully. Naturally, that one look creases his forehead. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing…” I mumble, breaking our eye contact while shifting my weight. “Dog and I were just talking…”
“Is that right?” Kemper blinks. Dog barks at him, staying by my side.
“Baby…” I shake my head. “I think… it’s time.”
Kemper’s face falls, though he doesn’t look surprised in the slightest. He already knows what I’m thinking. Not another word needs to be uttered.
He exhales a long breath. “Dascha…”
“Kellan…”
“It’s not safe,” he grunts firmly. “The Ivory—”
“If The Ivory wanted us, he could’ve gotten us a hundred times by now,” I interrupt pointedly.
“Believe it or not, that isn’t a comfort.” He rubs his eyes.
“Kel,” I put on my sweetest tone, easing up to him. “What if they need our help? I won’t be able to live with myself…”
“You’re not just talking about taking a trip to New York, Dascha!” He gripes. “He owns that island. He’ll see us coming from a mile away, and I will not put you in danger. Over my dead fucking body.”
For some reason, even just hearing those words kicks a bolt of fear up my spine. But it’s not the only negative emotion I’m feeling right now…
“It’s all my fault…” I mumble barely audibly as I wring my shaky hands.
“What?” He grunts.
“This is all my fault, Kellan!” I bark. So does Sobaka.
“I started all of this shit when I escaped, don’t you get that?
? If I’d never broken out thinking I was…
leaving with you…” I pause to gulp. His eyes soften and sparkle.
“Velle wouldn’t have had it out with The Ivory, and he wouldn’t have felt the need to retaliate to protect his goddamn ego! ”
Kemper is quiet for a moment before murmuring, “That’s not why Velle had it out with The Ivory…
” My head cocks. “Something happened with Velle’s mom…
But it was a long time coming with those two.
Trust me.” He places his bag of groceries on the floor and takes my hands.
“Dascha, hear me when I tell you that this is not your fault. It’s no one’s fault but his.
It was inevitable, honestly. This is his thing…
Power, yes, but even more, the fight for it.
The tactical warfare, the bloody battles…
It’s what makes Manuel Blanco The Ivory, and he’ll find a way to get it. No matter what.”
I feel weighed down by a hundred pounds of hopelessness.
But then I remember what my doctor always says…
Carry it. The weight of your mental illness… The longer you do, the stronger you get.
Until it doesn’t feel so heavy anymore.
Squaring my shoulders, I look my fiancé, the love of my life, dead in his deep blue eyes.
“All the more reason to go… and fight. For them, and for us.” I cup his jaw in my hand.
“Baby, I don’t want to spend the rest of our lives looking over our shoulders, waiting for the day when he’s bored or some shit, and decides to come for us.
I don’t want to put either of us in danger either, Kel, but isn’t it better to get ahead of it?
Show up on our own terms, rather than cuffed and blindfolded in the back of an SUV? ”
The look on his face reflects so many things. Worry, fear, frustration. But also wonder…
I think sometimes he forgets how real my time in Alabaster Pen was. It’s turned into such an illusion in our minds over the last year… A story, more than something that actually happened.
And it did. Not all of it, not the way I remember it… But the rest.
That I was strong enough not only to survive Alabaster Pen, but overcome it, I know he knows what that means.
I can do this. And with him by my side, I think we’re as close to unstoppable as it gets.
I like those odds.
Kemper takes a deep breath, puffing it out slowly, just staring, eyes locked with mine. Eventually, he peeks at the dog. “What do you think about this, son?”
Sobaka barks and rushes him. In an instant, he’s jumping around, tail wagging, nuzzling Daddy, and I just have to laugh.
“Hmm… he’s on your side,” Kemper grumbles teasingly. “What else is new?”
I shrug, toning down my grin.
Kemper bends to pat Dog, letting him lick his face all over. “Yea, you say that now… Just wait until we have to leave you for God knows how long.”
I gulp down the nerves trying to climb up my throat. Shit, I hadn’t thought of that.
“I’m not saying I’m not scared,” I tell Kellan as he stands, sliding his hands onto my lower back to pull me into him. “I definitely am. But I’m more confident in us. And our friends. Regardless of what’s happening there, together, I know we can handle it.”
His mouth quirks at the corner. “I love how determined you are right now, Luscious. If for no other reason than that… Let’s fuckin’ do this.”
“Hell yea!” I cheer.
Sobaka barks. Kellan laughs.
“Looks like we’re going back to New York.” He grins.
“Alexa, play Empire State of Mind.”
What is even happening right now?
I’ve gotta say, when I wrapped my head around the notion of returning to Alabaster Isle to check on my friends and potentially fight The Ivory, I definitely didn’t anticipate this being a pivotal step in the plan—one somehow stranger and more nerve racking than taking on the cartel.
Kellan and I are in Long Island. Babylon, to be specific. At the home of his ex-wife and her new husband, which also happens to be the same house she and my fiancé once shared.
Yea, no. I didn’t have this one on my Bingo card.
Mild awkwardness aside, Nikki is a great person. Kind, down-to-earth, and just as beautiful as I remember, though it was only last year that we met… When I stole her husband.
Oops. My bad.
Cue Cher from Clueless GIF.
In anything, Nikki is more beautiful now, being that she’s a new mother. Apparently, she gave birth to little Julian Francis Tedisco only six weeks ago, which makes sense, given how tiny he is. Granted, she did tell us he decided to show up two weeks early.
“The little guy just couldn’t wait to get out here and start living,” Justin—Nikki’s new husband, and the father of this adorable little peanut who, thank the lord, is not Kellan’s—chuckles, delivering a couple cans of Coke to me and Kemper while we sit, stiffly, on the couch in their living room.
Kemper’s smile is melting from forced into genuinely happy for his ex because it’s just so glaringly obvious that everything worked out for the best.
“He’s so stinkin cute,” I marvel at the baby in Nikki’s arms. “And quiet.”
“We’re lucky,” Nikki says.
Despite her claiming to be exhausted from the stress of new motherhood, she still has a glow to her.
Call it the bliss of things finally falling into place.
“I really am so happy for you, Nik,” Kemper croons, and she returns the smile, gazing down at her bundle of joy. He glances at Justin. “Both of you. Or… the three of you, I should say.”
“Please, I’m happy for you,” she beams, at both of us.
I’m grinning up a storm, taking Kemper’s hand in mine and squeezing it. His palms are sweaty as hell, and he’s taking a large sip of Coke to pull focus from the flush in his cheeks. It’s fully adorable.
“Yea, when’s the wedding?” Justin chirps, and Kemper coughs into his drink.
“Babe,” Nikki scolds. Even that sounds like a lullaby right now. “Way to make it awkward.”
Pretty sure it was already awkward…
“What?” Her hubby frowns. “They are engaged… You said that, didn’t you?”
I laugh.
“Yea, no, we’re definitely engaged…” Kemper shifts in his seat.
“He just gets really squirmy when it comes to the idea of planning a wedding.” I cast him an evil smirk.