Chapter 2
1Year Ago
Jabarri
I loosen the tie pulling it off, opting to forgo wearing one tonight. Natalie”s family is having a family dinner, and she asked me to please come so she doesn’t stab herself to death at the dinner table. Their family dinners are nothing like ours,. We talk, laugh, plot, crack on each other, and occasionally get our asses whooped all in one night. Natalie’s family is more strict and boring than a dinner in a cemetery. My brothers and I are close and are usually all up in each other’s business but Natalie’s parents expect to know each and everything that their children are up to. She is a few years younger than me, but her parents treat her and her brother like toddlers to the point of buying them their own house right next door to them. I think the only reason my biracial ass made it past the rigorous vetting session is my bank account. I got the feeling I was about several shades too dark for their liking, but the fact that my bank account had several more zeros than theirs was pretty much evening things out.
Natalie saved me in a way, I was dealing with a situation I was completely unfamiliar with and was going through women like tissue until I met her in a big box electronics store, getting ripped off by the salesperson. She was beautiful, with dark blonde hair, green eyes, tall and slim. I walked over. “They’re ripping you off. You’ll get a better deal if you reach out to the manufacturer.” I told her. “They are charging you twice as much as you can get it someplace else.”
“The money is not the problem,” she says.
“I never assumed it was, but just because it’s not a problem doesn’t mean you should be ripped off,”
“True,” she says, turning to really look at me. “Why don’t you explain to me over lunch.” She offered, and the rest, as they say, is history. I spray on my cologne and head to her parents” house. That lunch we went to that afternoon had me reaching out to all the women I was seeing and telling them it’s over by that evening. Over the years, I have watched my brothers fall one by one for their wives and be happier than ever. At first, I wanted nothing to do with it, but the older I got, the more I desired what they had. Who I thought I wanted was not an option, so I gave up the dream until I met Natalie, but I guess nothing was going to be that easy.
I grab my keys and head out for a long night. I never prayed for or desired patience, but for some reason, God has been putting me in positions that force me to have it.
“So, Jabarri, I thought we would be planning a wedding by now,” Amy, Natalie’s mom, says as we are passing dishes of food and I have to refrain from letting my Gideon nature come out.
“We are moving at our own pace, Mrs. Rawlins,” I reply with a forced smile.
“Mom, no,” Natalie tells her.
“What?” she shrugs innocently.
“All your mother is saying is why should he buy the cow if he’s getting the milk for free,” Chris, her dad, says.
“Okay, I think I’m done for the night,” Camryn, her brother, says as he pushes back from the table.
“Mom and Dad you both are way out of line. I am a grown woman and I will marry who I want to marry when I want to marry them. Thanks for dinner but I think Jabarri and I are leaving,” Natalie says, dropping her napkin on her plate as she pushes back from the table.
“Wait, we didn’t mean it like that! You guys don’t have to leave,”
“No, we do, I can tell Jabarri is holding on by a thread to not be disrespectful, and honestly, I’m no longer hungry. Let”s go,” she says and I am in motion before she can get the last word out fully.
“Can we go get a burger, please,” she asks once we get in the car, her head pressed against the headrest.
“Of course we can,” I tell her, starting the car and pulling away from her parents” house. When I met, her I was running through women, I was actually jealous of my old ass brothers. All of them settled down with amazing women. I love my sisters. They are a riot, they keep my brothers on their toes and match them in every way. Aryan is the last man standing technically, but he is so in love with Brooklyn but is too stubborn to admit it. Hopefully, he’ll be able to get the girl, leaving me the only single Gideon man. Natalie is beautiful, fun to be with, and easy to talk to. Things moved really fast after we met, but her parents were constantly in the middle of our relationship.
When I asked her why her parents were so involved with their kids” lives, she replied that’s how her dad’s parents are with them even to this day. It’s extremely weird to me, seeing as how my parents are the exact opposite. They only get involved if we ask them to.
“We’re having a family dinner.”
“Jabarri,” she warns.
“It’s just dinner,”
“I know, but you know how I feel about that and why.”
“Fine,” I say through clenched teeth. When she originally gave me her reasoning, I agreed but now it bothers the hell out of me.
“Jabarri, we talked about this,”
“My family wouldn’t care about it, Natalie, and they wouldn’t say anything either,” I told her again.
“I am not ready,” I shift gears and hurry to get her food so I can head home. Some things need to change…soon.
“I know you are angry, and I am sorry,”
“I’m not angry.”
If I were her, I would have been moved away from my parents, but for some reason, she and Camryn have chosen to stay under their parents.
“Please, I know you well enough to be able to tell when you are angry, Jabarri. I don’t like making you angry, I will think more about it okay. Don’t be mad, I love you,” she says, covering my hand with hers on the gear shift.
“I love you, too,” I flip my hand over to grasp hers and give it a gentle squeeze. She can always talk me off the ledge effortlessly. We talk about dinner, laughing at her parents” antics until we get to the restaurant. However, I do not feel like seeing her parents peeking out of the window with watchful eyes.
“Are you coming in?” she asks me when I pull into her driveway.
“Naw, not tonight. We have a lot to do tomorrow, so I better be getting home,”
“Jabarri,”
“I’m just tired, Nat, that’s all.”
“Ok,” she says, obviously not believing me, and I don’t blame her. I think I have experienced every emotion tonight but I really am tired at this point.
Getting out of the car I walk around to help her out of the car and walk her to her door. Pulling her into my arms for a hug, I kiss her on the forehead and wait for her to go into the house safely before I head back to my car.
I take the scenic route home. I am tired, but I am in no hurry to get back home. Before I realize what I am doing, I am sitting in front of her house. I have been worried about her, but I know it’s not my place to check in on her, and I am sure she wouldn’t want my help. I can remember the first time I saw her, tiny, beautiful, and mean as a damn rattlesnake, and I was halfway in love instantly. Then, her girlfriend walked in and shit went downstairs immediately. I acted an ass, she acted an ass, and I thought I was reading her wrong that she wasn’t attracted to me, but when she melted into me at Peter’s wedding, I knew it wasn’t one-sided. But Joseph called me out on my shit, and I knew then I had to pull back before I made things worse.
I made peace with it for the first time in my life, not getting what I wanted. I tried to be somewhat cordial to her. I started dating a lot until I met Natalie, and just like the bitch that she is, the universe saw fit to have her and her girlfriend break up. So now I’m the one in a relationship, and she’s single. When we got the call to come to the house because something was wrong with her, I had never in my life been so terrified before. When I saw her broken, hurt, and devastated. I wanted to go on a killing spree but ripping her house back to the studs helped. I wanted to be there for her to help her through this, but I kept my distance, and here I am sitting outside of her house like a stalker. I shouldn’t be here, I think, before I put the car in drive and head home before I do something I won’t regret.