Chapter 9
Jabarri
You have got to be kidding me! I think when I hear Aryan complaining about Brooklyn actually leaving him…finally. I am happy she finally put her foot down, but why the hell did she have to find refuge with Skai at Skai’s house? It’s been a couple of weeks, and nothing has changed, but today, we are helping Brooklyn pack her stuff up and moving her out of Aryan’s suites. That means she is finally alone and Natalie has been avoiding me but that shit stops today! It’s quick work to get Brooklyn all set up in her new house, and I am heading straight to talk to Natalie. I didn’t bother calling first and giving her the chance to avoid me and I pull into her driveway, get out the car and walk in the house without bothering to knock. I catch her and Scottlyn kissing on the sofa, jumping apart guiltily.
“You’re in here doing that and left the front door open? I could have very easily been your parents walking in here,”
“Jabarri, what’s wrong?” she asks, jumping up from the sofa.
“We need to talk.”
“Can’t it wait?”
“No, we need to talk. Now.” I tell her.
“I’m going to go so y’all can talk. I’ll call you later,” Scottlyn says, grabbing her keys and leaving.
“It’s time, Natalie. You were supposed to tell your parents weeks ago, but you haven’t.”
“You know why, Jabarri. I thought you’d understand you haven’t told your family about Skai either. What’s the difference?”
“The difference is you haven’t had to choose between me or Scottlyn. The difference is I never put you in a position where you could lose what you have with her, but you have constantly done that for me. It’s ninety percent my fault because I let you, but you were okay with my losing Skai as long as you got to be with Scottlyn and not upset your family,”
“I’ll lose everything,” she whispers as the first tear falls.
“You won’t lose me, Nat. But I can’t keep being this person for you. I want my happily ever after, too. Things between us have to change,”
“I know, and I am sorry. As much as my family drives me to drink, I can’t imagine losing them. They are all I have,”
“You won’t lose me, sis,” Camryn says from the doorway.
“You heard?” she says to her brother on the verge of freaking out.
“Yeah, I heard, but honestly, I knew you liked girls,”
“What! How?”
“It wasn’t that hard to spot, and if Mom and Dad stopped riding in the boat on the river of denial, they’d be able to admit they knew, too. Listen, we can’t keep living our lives to please Mom and Dad. Someone has to break this controlling cycle we’ve been living in, and why not us? I am leaving, I have my own dreams and desires, and I am going to live my life. I have been saving for years, and I have enough saved to go live in Europe for several years.” He reaches into the bag he was holding and pulls out a phone box. “Here’s a phone for you. I paid it for the year, which should give you enough time to find a job and be able to pay for it on your own. Get some independence, Nat. Depending and relying on Mom and Dad is what got us into this mess, and I am over it. I love you, sis,” he tells her, pulling her into a tight hug.
“You’re leaving me?”
“Come with me,”
“I can’t, Scottlyn is here. I love her,”
“Well, you two can come visit me,”
“Yes, we can. When do you leave?”
“As soon as my passport gets here,” he says, and her eyes widen with the news.
“You got a passport? How did you do that without Mom and Dad knowing?”
“Like I said, I saved my money, I got a PO Box, and a separate phone, and one day when they were away, I had my own internet ran so they couldn’t monitor what I was researching. This shit isn’t normal, Nat, none of this is. We’re both adults, but they treat us worse than toddlers.
My passport will come to the PO Box, and I will buy my airline ticket and leave. Hell, I keep a go bag in my trunk.”
“Will you at least let me see you before you just leave?”
“Of course, that is why I got you your own phone. But Jabarri is right. It’s time to stop living in fear, and it’s not right to keep him from having the life he’s been waiting for, just like it’s not right for you to not be able to live your life.” he hugs her again before kissing her forehead. “Can you keep an eye out for her?”
“Certainly. I wish you the best,” I tell him, shaking his hand before he walks out.
“You know you don’t have to tell them shit, just move out. I have a couple of houses that are available. We can go tomorrow and take a look at them,” I offer her.
“Okay,” she says, and I take a deep breath. It feels like I am finally able to breathe. Hold on, Skai, I’m coming! And this time, I am not leaving,
Skai
“Oh, uh, no thanks. I’m married,” I tell the guy who is trying to ask me out on a date. All I wanted was a frappucino and I am being hounded. Ugh, I hate it here. I kinda wondered if I liked all men, but nope, just one in particular. Men still give me the ick.
“Where’s your ring then?”
“Being cleaned,” I respond without thinking as I pick up my speed to get away from him because the next stop is shooting his ass, and admittingly he is a nice-looking man, he’s just not my man.
“Whatever,” he says, finally turning and walking away. Thank God. I get in my car and take off before he changes his mind. Brooklyn is all set up in her house, and once again, I am alone. What’s crazy is I have always enjoyed being alone, actually preferred it, but since Jabarri and Brooklyn left, the house just feels extra lonely now. I don’t bother pulling into the garage when I get home and come to find out that was a mistake. I feel him as soon as I cross the threshold, I can sense him, can smell him. I round the corner, and there he is, sprawled out on my sofa.
“Get out,” I tell him without preamble, heading to my bedroom. Please leave, please leave, please leave. I chant in my head because he picked the day where I am feeling the most fragile. If he touches me, I am going to fold like a lawn chair.
“Skai, I just want to talk, please,” he says as he reaches for me, and I almost roll my ankle avoiding contact.
“I can’t touch you or talk to you now,”
“Jabarri, just say what you want to say and get out,”
“Damn. Well, okay, I know I made a mess of this trying to be a friend for Natalie and be there for you, but I realize now that there was no way I could do both and I am sorry that you took the most loss in the situation. I talked to Natalie. I won’t lose you, Skai, not when I just got you,”
“Who says I am still available or want to be with you anymore? It felt kinda nice going to the party with Elias,”
“Don’t play with me, Skai! You almost got Elias archived,” he says, and I am forced to hold in the laugh even though I know he is serious.
“You’re being a bit dramatic, aren’t you? I was doing him a favor. There is nothing there but friendship, but I still enjoyed being on a man’s arm.”
“Let me explain something to you,” he starts.
“No, there is nothing to explain, Jabarri. You made a choice and whatever happens as a result of that choice, is of your own making. You are not about to stand here and act like a neanderthal from the thought of me being with someone else. If you wanted me and didn’t want anyone else to be with me then you should have acted like it. Now if that is all you have to say we’re done here and I am sure you can find your way out,” I turn on my heels to put as much space between us as possible.
“You know, Skai,” he says moving slowly toward me like I am a skittish horse. “You have been going out of your way to avoid me touching you.” He continues advancing on me until his front is pressed against my front. Even though I did not want him touching me, I am no punk or coward. There is no way I was going to run from him.
“You’re touching me now, Ja bar ri,” I say, purposely emphasizing the syllables in his name. “I’m not running,” I tell him, craning my neck to look up at him. In all the time we were together, we have kept everything pretty PG, simply due to my hang-ups, but I got a feeling tonight is going to change that. Am I nervous? Yes. Am I comfortable with men? No, not sexually. If he touches me, will I stop him? No. Out of all the men on this planet, I crave him, I want to feel him feel me, every part of me.
But I am supposed to stand firm for all the bull shit he put me through with his stupidity, right? Yes, damn it, Skai, the answer is yes, but… shit, fuck it. And that is the last coherent thought I had before I feel his hand on my face seconds before his lips touch mine lightly, exploring, asking permission, and just like I thought, my willpower exits stage left. My hands burrow in his hair, as I open my mouth to his gentle assault, that turns almost frantic. We groan at the same time, the kiss becomes more intense. I grab handfuls of his hair pulling and he returns the favor by grabbing a handful of my ass and squeezing. The next thing I know I am in the air, my legs wrapped around his waist and the wall at my back. Somewhere in the background I wait for the panic to set in, but all I feel is him. I undulate my hips rubbing my legging covered pussy against the bulge in his pants chasing the orgasm that is barreling down on me. In my relationship with Alayna, I was the aggressive one, the one who controlled what happened in the bedroom, and Jabarri is going to have to accept that he can’t control me in or out of the bedroom.
“That’s cute, Skai,” he tells me once he releases my mouth.
“Hush, you’re breaking my concentration,” I tell him, doubling my effort to cum. “What wait! No! Jabarri, why would you do that!” I am practically screaming from the loss of him and the orgasm that I was seconds away from.
“You need to learn something, Skai,”
“Now? I need to learn it right now? Are you crazy? Save this shit for later, preferably after I cum. Do you know how long it’s been?”
“Yeah, since you were born, because regardless of what you thought of sex before me, trust me I am going to redefine it for you. And you’re not about to use me like a human vibrator to get off on, I control what happens in the bedroom, Skai, not you.”
“Pfft,” I reply.
“Challenge accepted.”
“What?” I ask, and he is setting me on my feet. As soon as my feet touch the floor, he moves back just enough to spin me to face the wall, his chest pressing against my back, and pressing me against the wall.
“Who are you with, Skai?”
“You.”
“What’s. My. Name?”
My God, was being with an aggressively dominating man on my bingo card this year? No, it was not, but, damn, I’m glad it is now.
“Jabarri,”
“Damn right! You remember that. Remember that I will always protect you and I will never hurt you. You. Are. Mine! And I will kill anyone and anything that threatens that or you, I will. Do you trust me?”
“Yes,” comes out on a choked breath when I feel his hand push past the band of my leggings and touch my soaked lips.
“Fuck you are wet, baby. Is this all for me?” he asks, and I can’t put two words together to come up with any kind of response, so I simply answer with a shake of my head. “Use your words, N?ku Ahi.”
“Your fire? Yes, it’s all for you, Taku Rangimārie,” his finger separates my lips to find and rub my clit. Immediately, my legs give out, his other arm bands around me to hold me in place as he continues to manipulate my body and give me the pleasure I need. “Hands on the wall,” he growls in my ear. I want to hear you enjoy this, Skai. I want your cries to fill my ears as my fingers fill your tight channel. Can you do that for me, baby? I like words of affirmation so I know I am doing a good job. Harder, Jabarri. More, Jabarri. Yes, Jabarri. I’m cumming, Jabarri, and my personal favorite, I love you, Jabarri.”
Damn, the man is killing me. I am hanging on by a thread. I am literally fighting back from cumming just out of spite. I am such a fucking brat.
“Oh, you’re fighting it,” he says, biting my collarbone before I feel his finger slide inside me with precision and my muscles clamp down immediately on the digit. The heel of his hand is pressed against my nubbin as he begins pumping his finger in and out of me. He pulls the finger out and replaces it with two, then three, while consistently manipulating my clit. When I cum, I am going to black out.
“Give it to me, Skai. Let your body go. I got you. Let me hear the pleasure I’m giving you. I love the feel of you, inside and out, just for me. Only for me. I can’t wait to fuck you properly, to push inside of you, and feel your heat wrapped around my dick. I waited so many years for you, and the first time I fuck you is going to feel like perfection. Damn, I’ve missed you. I love you so fucking much, now stop being stubborn and cum.”
I turn my face to rest my cheek on the wall to try to get a look at him and let go of the tight hold I had on my body. “Aaahhhhh!” I scream as I orgasm, making my mind shut down. I turn my face to see him, and all I see is white light and hear roaring in my ears. After a long few seconds, I hear his voice filter through the noise. “I got you, baby. I love you. Fuck, you’re beautiful,” and then nothing.