Chapter 12
CHAPTER TWELVE
The night before had been disturbing and confusing, and Jackson had managed to make Paula doubt her convictions. She needed a friend to talk with, and Kate had agreed to meet her.
Paula opened the door and spotted Kate standing in the waiting line at the check-in desk.
She went to her friend, and they exchanged a quick hug as they waited for a table.
Crazy busy as it was on Sunday, they had to wait almost fifteen minutes.
Maybe IHOP wasn’t the greatest choice, but since The Sweet and Savory Table—their favorite café—wasn’t open on the weekend, it had become their go-to place on a Sunday.
Eventually, a server led them to a small booth near the window. Menus were handed over, coffee poured, and within a few minutes, they’d placed their usual orders: pancakes for Kate, omelet and hash browns for Paula.
By the time their food arrived, the initial rush of weekend chatter had settled into something more comfortable, and Paula felt the tension in her shoulders begin to ease.
“Girl, if we do this too often, I’ll have to up my exercise routine,” Kate teased.
Paula assessed the tall redhead. “All I see is a beautiful woman with a healthy body.”
Kate grinned. “You’re right. We can indulge now and again.” To emphasize her words she speared a piece of pancake dripping with butter and syrup and brought it to her mouth. She moaned around the morsel in appreciation, savoring the taste.
Paula pushed her breakfast around on the plate, put down her fork, and took a big gulp of coffee. Luckily, the dark liquid had cooled down.
When she looked up, Kate was studying her with narrowed eyes. She, too, let go of her fork and took the time to dab her mouth with a napkin. Paula’s throat was dry, and she licked her lips. She had so many questions, and now she didn’t seem to be able to utter a word.
To her bewilderment, Kate leaned back and settled into the faux leather bench with a big smile. “Cat got your tongue?”
“Now I believe you’re a sadist,” Paula muttered, and Kate let out a melodic laugh.
The corner of Paula’s mouth twisted, and she shook her head, before chuckling herself. It was so freeing to be able to let go and laugh with a friend.
After a few moments of shared amusement, Kate dried her eyes and turned serious. “Since you can crack a joke, does that mean you’re more comfortable with the topic?”
Paula considered the question. She was, wasn’t she? “You’re right about that. Visiting the club and seeing some of th— The scenes helped.”
“How so?” Kate prodded.
“What is it with you people and these questions? Don’t you have any boundaries? I like to keep my private thoughts—well—private.”
“I can understand that, but this lifestyle only works when you’re honest and open about your emotions and desires,” Kate said.
“Okay, I get that, but it’s hard.”
Paula paused, but Kate remained silent.
Sadist!
“To be honest, I liked most of what I witnessed in the club last night. It helped me understand the appeal the lifestyle has, although I didn’t get everything that was going on.”
“What did you like?” Kate asked, her breakfast apparently forgotten.
Paula took another sip of coffee. Yeah, she was self-aware enough to know she was stalling.
Paula exhaled slowly, tracing the rim of her coffee cup with her fingertip.
“I liked James and Laura’s scene. Their connection.
” She hesitated, sorting through the tangle of emotions that had been nagging at her since she’d watched them together.
“Actually”—she tapped her bottom lip as realization dawned—“that was also what drew me to Lincoln and Henry.”
Kate gave her a dashing smile. “That’s the heart of every BDSM relationship.”
Paula nodded, the thought settling deeper inside her.
Connection. That was what had hooked her.
Not the kink. Not the rules. Not even the power dynamics, though those still left her intrigued and uncertain in equal measure.
It was the way James and Laura had moved as one, the way Henry and Lincoln had balanced each other so naturally. It was trust.
Kate’s smile faded as she added, “That’s also what’s missing with casual play like what Scott and I do.”
Paula did not like Kate’s sad expression, but she had no idea what she could say to her. She gave Kate’s hand a comforting squeeze and remained silent.
“So, what else can I help you with about the lifestyle?” Kate returned to her matter-of-fact self. “How did things go with Jackson?”
Paula let out a dry laugh and leaned back in her chair. “I’m not sure. I can’t decide how I feel about all this control and obedience stuff. And what’s all this about contracts? He kept talking about them but never really explained.”
“I can understand your confusion.” Kate’s brow lifted slightly, and she nodded in understanding.
“Contracts in BDSM are an individual preference. Some people swear by them, others think they’re nonsense or just a waste of time.
Of course, they’re not legally enforceable, no matter what some people claim.
” She tapped a fingernail against the table for emphasis.
“But they can be useful. A contract is a way for a couple or group to spell out responsibilities, duties, limits, safewords, and sometimes punishments. They’re most common with serious, long-term relationships. ”
Paula absorbed that, tightening her fingers slightly around her cup. “So, Henry and Lincoln probably have one?”
“I’d bet on it,” Kate said. “They’re 24/7, and they’re both lawyers, so you know they’ve got things in writing. Jackson, too. He had a 24/7 relationship with Monica, so it makes sense he thinks in those terms.”
Paula let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. It made sense now, at least logically. But emotionally? She still wasn’t sure where she stood.
“I have a job that matters a lot to me. I’m not sure I want to give up control of that. With a contract, he could order me to quit.”
Kate snorted, shaking her head. “Not if you set it up so your job is off limits. A contract is a negotiation . The Dom doesn’t get to dictate what’s in it.
The sub has just as much input. You negotiate as equals.
” Her eyes sparkled with mischief as she added, “And if Jackson tries to tell you different, you can send him my way.”
That pulled a real laugh from Paula, the tension in her chest easing somewhat. Negotiation . Equals . Those words mattered.
“That sounds really great, Kate. Thanks a lot.” She glanced down at her cup, feeling something shift inside her—not a decision, not yet, but maybe the possibility of one. “I’ll do that… if we make it that far.”