15. Kennedy
Kennedy
I have forty hours left.
And I’m choosing – voluntarily - to spend seven of them locked in a stuffy kitchen, scrubbing pans and plates until my hands feel raw and the smell of grease covers up my own tainted scent.
If I didn’t already know I was losing my mind, this would confirm it.
I’d choose this any day over sitting alone in the trailer though. One of the chefs hums along to the radio in the background, and I listen to their conversation, drinking it in as I pick up the towel and begin drying.
Mick calls over from where he’s examining the orders. “That’ll be it for a few. Take out the trash when you’re done.”
I double-bag for good measure, trying not to gag at the smell before carrying it out through the back and tossing it into the garbage.
Brushing off my hands, I wander up the alley to the main street, glancing up and down. As I turn, my gaze catches on the window, brightly lit like an advertisement.
And right there, sitting in full fucking view, are my mates. All of them.
Sitting there with Kristen Edwards tucked in between them. Theo laughs, and Oscar grins, his arm slung around the back of the booth as she looks up at him.
It looks so… easy.
I lose my balance. One moment, the ground is steady beneath my feet. And then – it’s gone. I’m sitting on my ass on the sidewalk, still watching them.
This is what it’ll be like. I’ll be gone, and they’ll just… move on. Biting down on my lip, I barely feel my hands curling into fists, my nails breaking skin.
They don’t love you.
You’re not staying anyway.
Both points which make being theirs an impossibility. Something that was never going to happen, no matter how much I wished for it.
But I’m not gone yet.
I sit there for a few minutes. I don’t know what I’m looking for. A few people step around me, muttering to themselves as they pass by. Shaking their head at the weird, trashy omega that ruined the golden boy of Widow’s Peak, sat on the floor with tears on her face.
Maybe they don’t know everything, but they know all they need to know to judge me.
It hits me like a brick, then.
Nobody will miss me when I’m dead.
And in that moment, I wonder if anyone will even remember me.
My mother dumped me and took off. My father left me alone after a seizure, packing his bags and running so I couldn’t beg him to stay. And my mates are sitting there laughing with their arms around another fucking omega.
I swallow hard. My eyes begin to burn.
I’ll give them something to remember.
I stumble to my feet, racing back to the kitchen. Everyone ignores me as I yank open the marketing cupboard.
I know it’s here. I saw it – there.
Mick tried to rebrand as a baseball bar once. It didn’t work, but the bat he had on the wall is still propped in the corner, his name written on the pale yellow wood in red, swirling script.
It feels heavy in my hands as I grip it.
They think I’m a psychopath anyway. I may as well prove them right.
I walk right past the window, trailing the bat over the sidewalk beside me. In the corner of my eye, I see Oscar’s face change. See him blanch, as he turns.
That’s right. I see you, mate .
And they all see me. See the moment I swing the bat back, and I smash it forward with every bit of whatever strength I have left inside me.
Directly into the windscreen of Theo’s truck.
It’s not like he can’t afford to replace it. Just like he’s replacing me, when I’m still fucking here .
It hurts more than I thought possible. It feels like I can’t fucking breathe, like their disdain is shredding me.
It hurts more than those seventeen bite marks that are poisoning me from the inside out.
But this… yes. This helps.
The glass shatters with one hit, and I heft the bat in my hands, considering as my lips twist into a sharp smile.
I like this.
Again, this time smashing through the back window.
I don’t look back at that window. I don’t want to see their faces.
But I unload every bit of rage inside me onto that truck. Footsteps ring out, shouting. And when arms wrap around me, I throw my head back.
Something crunches, and there’s a curse. “Fucking – drop the fucking bat .”
“Let go of me!” I hiss back at them, the bat swinging precariously until I lose my grip and it tumbles to the ground. I lift my feet up in the air, kicking out as Theo drags me back.
“What the fuck are you doing?” He shouts it, turning me around and gripping my shoulders. “Are you insane?”
“ Yes .” I scream it back at him. “Fucking insane for ever giving a fuck about you !”
More hands pull us apart. Jake has his arms around Theo as he pulls him away, and Max’s voice sounds in my ear. Oscar appears in front of me, his eyes traveling down. “She’s bleeding. Get a first aid kit.”
I stiffen. My bandages . “Come near me, and I’ll shred your fucking face too. Go back to your precious fucking Kristen!”
My anger isn’t abating. It’s growing. Where the fuck is my bat?
All of them are talking, shouting. And Theo’s mouth is bleeding. He pushes Oscar out of the way as I fight against Max’s grip. “ Be still .”
The world stops. Everything stops. And so do I.
As if a button has been pressed.
I suck in a breath. Even Theo’s eyes widen slightly, before he glares at me again. “Enough, Kennedy.”
“Theo,” Oscar murmurs. “Be careful.”
Be careful, with the psychotic omega. With their fucked-up mate.
Careful enough that he’s used his fucking alpha bark on me to make me stop. I’m clearly only their mate when he can use it to hurt me.
I blink, and the tears spill over. “I hate you.”
The whisper pushes through my lips, and Theo’s green eyes flicker. “The feeling’s fucking mutual. Kneel.”
I drop. My knees crash into the ground. Jake pushes forward. “Enough. Her knees, Theo.”
The crunch of glass beneath my jeans tells me it’s too late for his worry. Theo crouches in front of me. He doesn’t smile. “Enough fucking around. Tell us what happened with Brett, Kennedy. ”
My muscles lock. No.
I won’t.
I clench my jaw tightly. “I—,”
You can fight this.
But I’m so tired. I’ve been fighting for so long.
I could tell them. Let it all spill out. Watch their faces change, see the regret set in.
But it would all be for nothing.
And I’ll be dead soon. They can’t fix me.
So I bite down on my tongue, tasting metal. And I say nothing.
Theo wavers. His hand reaches up. He swipes over his face. “Fucking hell, Kenny. Just tell me. Please. Say it .”
I focus on his face. On his eyes.
Such beautiful green eyes. I always thought so.
Let him hate me. Let them hate me, and miss their pack brother. Telling them the truth would destroy them. More so now than before even.
Because I’m their mate.
More tears spill down my face.
But I keep my mouth shut, even as the push turns into pain. Pressure, building in my head, telling me to give in . It’s unnatural for an omega to defy an alpha bark.
But I’m not an ordinary omega. Not anymore.
I see the moment panic filters into Theo’s eyes. When it registers that I’m not giving in, not telling him what he wants to hear. “Ken? Stop it. Whatever you’re doing.”
The familiar pop echoes in my ears. The flow of warm blood, sticky and hot. “Kenny – shit. Her nose is bleeding. Let her go, Theo. Now .”
But Theo’s eyes are sharpening, dark brows drawing together as he stares at my face. His skin pales. “What the hell is that, Kenny?”
Black . Black is what he’s seeing. Poison.
The low whine slips from my throat, and he flinches back. “Enough. Just – you don’t have to. Stop. Whatever you’re doing, Ken, stop. Please .”
I almost fall forward, my hands slamming out into the grass-strewn ground.
Hands on my face. Oscar, shouting at Theo. Theo shouting back, his voice strained. Max, dabbing at my nose, asking me questions. And Jake, staring at the black-streaked tissue.
His eyes meet mine, and I know.
He knows something.
I shake my head in silent request, pushing out of Max’s hold. Raw words spill from my throat. “Let me go.”
Theo steps toward me, but Oscar is there, his voice a whip. “ Don’t touch her .”
“I’m not…,” Theo falters. “Kennedy? Are you alright?”
No. I slip free from Max, backing away from them. My eyes slip to the truck. Theo’s gaze follows. “I don’t care about the truck. Did I – you’re still bleeding.”
My head feels hazy. I hold up my hands when they move toward me. “Leave me alone.”
One step. Two. “Just – enough.”
“Kenny.” Jake keeps his voice low. Coaxing. “We need to take you to a doctor, sweetheart. Your nose hasn’t stopped bleeding.”
My laugh startles all of them. It sounds too high, too loud, for our conversation. “No doctor.”
I used to be able to outrun all of them easily. With a grin on my face as I raced past them, tapping whatever we picked for a finish line and claiming stupid prizes. They always let me name whatever I wanted.
A hug. A back rub. Playing with my hair. Once, I got Theo to try eating frogspawn and laughed myself hoarse when he gagged.
I slide my eyes to his pale face. I don’t want to leave things like this, not really. I would have preferred a quiet exit. But I let myself look at all of them. Max and Jake are still talking. Max drops down to his knee, reaching for my leg, and I step away.
I can’t even feel it. Not when everything else is raw, blistering agony.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “About the truck.”
Oscar’s brow knots. “Kenny—,”
But I’m gone.