Chapter 8
Chapter Eight
B ut it did become a habit.
I was with Arden every day. I barely had time for anything or anyone else between my tutorials and school, which became a problem for my mother.
“So, you’re expecting me to believe you are staying over at Sarah’s or Kate’s nearly every night? I’m not stupid , Jain. It’s a boy.”
How did I explain to her that I’d tried to avoid boys all of my life, only having slept with one until a few months ago, when I started seeing Arden regularly? I was almost nineteen, I had nearly finished school, for crying out loud—but she still wouldn’t let up.
“I want you home after your tutorials that your English teacher is kindly giving you for free,” Mum said, the authoritative tone in her voice meant she was serious.
“But—”
“Who is he? Is he older than you? I bet all you’re doing is having sex. I pray to God you haven’t been stupid enough—”
“To make the same mistake you did in having me. Yeah, I got the memo the first thousand times Mum.”
I was fed up with her dictating my life. I was trying to do everything I could to smash my education to make her proud of me.
But Arden was just so good to be with—and yes, the sex was too addictive to turn down. He surprised me by meeting me at lunch, walking me to Mr Silvers, and meeting me afterwards. He seemed to be rather serious about me.
I grabbed my bag and headed to school, forgetting to get any breakfast.
Arden wasn’t at school until midday, which wasn’t unusual for him. So this gave me some time with Sarah and Kate.
“So, it’s serious then. This Arden shit,” Kate muttered as she sucked on her orange juice, her heavily made-up eyes glaring at me with the same disappointment I’d seen in my mother’s earlier.
“Why do you have such a problem with him?” I snapped, annoyed that my friends didn’t respect my choices. I bit into my sandwich, checking my phone to see if Arden had texted me.
“Duh, he is a waster. He barely attends school, and he smokes, he—”
“Fucking hell, Kate, judgemental much?” I laughed in disbelief as Kate shrugged.
“Why would you choose that over someone like Harley ?”
I stared at her, unable to believe what I was hearing.
“Kate, if you like Harley so much, why don’t you get with him?”
“I might,” Kate said airily as Sarah and I exchanged a look.
Sarah had been quiet, picking at her food and sighing.
“What’s wrong with you? Why are you all broody?” Kate demanded as she flicked her hair over her shoulder with irritation.
“Why are you such a bitch?” I found myself saying, as her mouth fell open in surprise. “What if there’s something wrong with her? Why do you insist on telling us who to date, how to be—”
Kate stood up angrily, her eyes flashing.
“Do you know what? Maybe you will turn out just like your mother, and it will be entirely your fault.”
“Kate!” Sarah hissed as I lost the ability to speak.
How had I ever considered Kate, my friend?
I couldn’t even look at her as she walked away, and I shrugged off Sarah’s hand.
“It’s fine, she’s just a bitch, and I never realised until now.”
“She was out of order. I think she’s jealous,” Sarah murmured, her eyes softening as she looked at me.
“Jealous? Kate?”
Sarah shrugged, pushing her food away.
“You’ve got Harley tripping over himself to be with you. You’re now seeing Arden, who, as much as she claims is a waster, is totally gorgeous. You’re clever and beautiful, inside and out.”
“Sarah, stop. You’re making me blush.”
I reached out to hug her, grateful I had her by my side. We made our way to our respective classes, and I wondered what had crawled up Kate’s ass.
I didn’t see Arden that day at all, so I sent him a text telling him I had my tutorial and couldn’t see him after as my mum needed me home.
When I finally arrived at Mr Silver’s, he seemed tired and snappy.
“What is with everyone today?” I muttered as I sat down at my usual spot at his table.
He glared at me before handing me a test paper.
“This is a mock GCSE paper. I think you should attempt it at home, and we will go over it in the next session. Which will probably be our last session, seeing how you have improved.”
“Sir, are you ok?” I asked carefully, my eyes burning into his.
“Yes, I’m fine. Just a little tired,” he answered, in a tone I’d not heard him use before. He seemed quiet, yet his voice was soft.
“Well, when I say that to teachers, they tell me I should sleep at night.” I smiled as he chuckled softly, his grey eyes crinkling in the corners.
“Do you?” Mr Silver asked as my heart thudded against my chest.
“What?”
“Sleep at night.”
“Uh, yeah, of course... doesn’t everyone?” I answered, puzzled by the question.
“No, not everyone,” he said, his eyes suddenly holding my gaze for longer than necessary. “Some people spend time doing things they shouldn’t, despite knowing it’s probably wrong.”
I froze, convinced there was a hidden meaning there.
Was he referring to Arden and me?
“The difference is, if something makes you feel good, who cares if it’s wrong?” I argued as he studied me carefully for a beat before blinking.
“Unfortunately, lots of people. Teachers, parents—even the law sometimes.”
“Are you referring to my relationship with Arden?” I asked as he frowned, shaking his head.
“I wasn’t aware what you had was a relationship, Jain. Congratulations. ”
His voice was dripping in sarcasm, and I stood up angrily.
“Well, apparently, everyone knows better than me. My mum, my so-called friends- and now you, my bloody teacher. I’m not in love with the man.”
“Boy,” he corrected me, and I felt my breath hitch in my throat.
“Sir—”
“My apologies. It’s my job to correct language when inappropriately used, I’m afraid.”
My heart hammered in my chest when he dropped his gaze over my body briefly before he met my eyes again.
“Anything else, Jain?”
Yes, actually, what the fuck was that look ? I wanted to ask but instead shook my head.
“No, Sir.”
“Maybe people are looking out for you. Sometimes it’s wise to listen.” Mr Silver walked me to the door, leaning past me to open it.
His neck was dangerously close to my mouth as he did, and I had to fight the urge to bury my face in it.
WHAT?!
“Sometimes it’s not.”
I stood, frozen to the spot as his gaze dropped to my lips before he glanced at the open door.
“Are you going, or—”
“Or what?” I whispered, unable to think with the way his eyes darkened when I spoke.
“Or nothing, I suppose. Our session is over,” he softly said as I took a step closer to the door.
Was it me, or did I see a flash of panic in his eyes?
“Yes, Sir.”
“Think about your options, Jain. Not all of them are obvious.”