Chapter 50
CHAPTER FIFTY
“Thank you for meeting me, Kate.” Laura kissed the other woman on the cheek before they settled at the bar of Club Indigo. The club wouldn’t open for another hour, but as a Dungeon Monitor, Kate could get in early.
“Of course, dear. Besides I’m curious about what you wanted to talk about,” Kate replied with a lifted eyebrow. She looked so much the Domme at that moment, even in her street clothes, Laura was lost for words.
“Um, yes, right, discuss,” she stammered, her nerves getting the best of her. Rubbing her hands on her jeans, she took a deep breath and collected her thoughts. “Well, James and I have been seeing a lot of each other these last few months. And we’ve been through a lot.”
“That’s an understatement.” Kate leaned back against the bar, her green eyes glinting with curiosity. “What can I do to help?”
Laura fidgeted with her hands, her eyes wandering around the club before settling back on Kate's intense gaze. “I'm at a crossroads, Kate. I don’t know how to proceed. ”
With a gentle smile, Kate listened attentively as Laura expressed her concerns and uncertainties about her relationship with James. “He wants a more permanent relationship and I wasn’t ready before…” She trailed off and looked over to Kate, forlorn and helpless.
Kate gave her a sideways glance. “But now you are ready to commit?”
Laura nodded and grimaced. “Isn’t that pitiful?”
It netted her a Domme-look. "It's completely normal to feel unsure and apprehensive, Laura," Kate reassured her. "Relationships, especially in the BDSM dynamic, can be complex and require open communication and trust. It's important to honor your own feelings and desires."
“I want to give James what he wants, but I'm afraid of making the wrong move. I panicked when he said he loved me, and now I don't know how to approach the topic of commitment,” Laura admitted. “First of all, I’m kind of old fashioned. The woman asking the man, it would also be like topping from the bottom, wouldn’t it? But I made him promise to respect my need to take things slow, so…”
Kate burst out laughing. “You’ve maneuvered yourself into quite some predicament, haven’t you?”
“I guess so.”
Kate paused and stared into the distance, a knowing smile playing on her lips. “Ah, the delicate dance of desires and fears. It's not uncommon in this lifestyle, dear. So, tell me, what are your concerns? What's holding you back from fully embracing a committed relationship with James?”
“I'm afraid of getting hurt, of losing myself in the process.” Laura hesitated, finding it difficult to put it into words. “It took a long time to find myself, to stand up on my own and feel like I was more than Jake made me believe I was. I don’t want to lose that, to lose myself , in another man, even a wonderful man like James.”
“Do you really think you will?”
“I already am! Oh Kate, when I’m with him, I feel so happy, so… feminine and safe and free! But is that me? Is it really? Or is it what he made me into? And how is that any different than Jake making me feel stupid and useless and small? It’s a better feeling, but at the end of the day, it’s still a man twisting me into a different woman! …isn’t it?”
Kate's expression softened, turning her into a friend more than a formidable Domme. “I understand your fears, Laura. Trust is a vital component of any relationship, and it takes time to build. Perhaps it's a matter of exploring the middle ground between commitment and maintaining your personal boundaries. Have you considered discussing your desires and concerns with James openly?”
Laura's shoulders relaxed and she cricked her neck. “I have thought about it, but I don't know how to broach the subject. I want to find a balance that honors both our needs.”
Kate cocked her head thoughtfully, then her face lit up and she bent her head closer to Laura. “I think I have an idea.”
Taking purposeful steps, James closed the distance from the parking lot to the club. As he strode toward the entrance, two businessmen walking in the opposite direction instinctively gave him a wide berth. The air around James seemed to crackle with a silent intensity, and the businessmen exchanged nervous glances as they hurriedly moved aside. The suits sensed his commanding presence and were clearly intimidated by his squared and broad shoulders and his face set in a stern expression.
Under normal circumstances, he might have been amused, but right now his stomach churned. It wasn’t exactly normal for Kate to call him this hour of the day.
He pushed open the heavy double doors and Kate intercepted him before he could take more than a single step inside.
“Kate,” he greeted her. “What’s the matter? Why did I need to get here ‘pronto’? What’s the emergency?”
A playful smirk danced on Kate's lips as she crossed her arms. “Oh, stop stressing, my dear worrywart.”
Her light-hearted teasing alleviated his concern, but raised his curiosity.
“There’s a pleasant surprise waiting for you in the main room.” Raising her hand, she motioned for him to proceed. “No questions. Just go!”
James regarded her skeptically. What the hell had gotten into her? He wasn’t sure he liked this. No, he was sure he didn’t like it; he’d never liked surprises. He had several questions he wanted to ask, but he knew Kate. Edging was her specialty. As much as he wanted to demand answers, he recognized that she wouldn't divulge any details. With a resigned sigh, he decided to trust her.
James continued through the club toward the main room. The dimmed lighting and the murmur of voices heightened his anticipation. His eyes scanned the room, trying to decipher the enigma that awaited him.
And then he saw her.