26. Ariana
26
ARIANA
I ’m so tired that my bones ache.
Every step feels heavy. My body drags, and my mind isn’t far behind, sluggish and fogged after days that haven’t stopped moving.
The past week has been a blur of change and emotion—one thing after another, unraveling the old and stitching in the new. Since the night Jasper looked into my eyes and told me he loved me, everything has shifted.
The next day, he moved all my things from the main house into his. No more going back and forth. No more lingering at the edges, wondering if I truly belonged. His home is my home now. And each time I catch the scent of his cologne on the pillows or hear his boots thudding down the hallway, it sinks in deeper in the best way possible.
We’ve been sorting through the camper, too. It’s not just about the stuff... There really isn’t a lot of it. But it’s about the memories tied to each one of how I survived on my own for several years. Jasper never rushes me. He waits as I pick up old trinkets, read torn notes, and decide what still matters. Most of it doesn’t. My blanket and Fluffy and Jasper are what mean the most to me. Everything else is just junk.
Cassian set me up with a new email account and started helping me learn how to apply for jobs online. He’s been super patient and even showed me how to make a basic resume. Jasper somehow got hold of my Social Security Number. When I asked him how he found it, he told me he hacked the state foster database. I decided not to ask how he knows about hacking into anything. From everything I’m learning about him and the type of work the guys do, they are really a bunch of assassin, spy geniuses. It’s starting to finally make sense why he's so controlling.
I’ve been hunched over Theo’s old laptop for hours, squinting at job listings and trying to figure out what someone like me could offer the world.
And now, after a loud, laughter-filled dinner at the main house, I’m beyond drained. My eyelids are heavy, my limbs feel like they’re filled with sand, and even my sippy cup of juice at the dining table took more energy than I had to hold. I’m dragging my feet across the gravel path back to Jasper’s house, my hand wrapped in his large, calloused one.
I must be scowling without realizing it, because he glances down at me and doesn’t say anything. He just gives my hand a little squeeze.
“Tonight, I’m going to fully regress you, baby girl,” he says, quiet but firm.
I blink up at him, caught off guard. “What? Now?”
He nods, already leading me inside. The door clicks shut behind us, and the air inside is warmer, softer, scented faintly of the new lilac candle he ordered for me after I tossed the old one from the camper.
“You’ve been doing so much. Trying so hard. You’ve earned a rest. Let me take care of everything tonight. Just let go.”
I hesitate on the first step, my stomach doing a small flip. “I don’t know…”
He stops and turns, facing me head-on. His eyes are calm, steady. “Baby girl. Trust me.”
My breath hitches. But then I bob my head. “Okay.”
He takes me upstairs, into our bedroom, and begins undressing me, his fingers warm and gentle. The soft rustle of fabric fills the room. Goosebumps rise across my arms as his fingers skim my shoulders, down my sides. It’s not sexual. He’s truly taking care of me without any expectations.
He disappears into the bathroom, and I hear the rush of water. The soft thunk of plastic toys being dropped into the tub. The clink of the faucet turning off. The air starts to smell like strawberries.
When he calls for me, I pad into the bathroom, completely naked and unashamed. That was one of the positive traits I got from my foster mom. She always taught us girls to love our bodies and have no shame in being naked around the people we trust.
Steam swirls around the room, and the soft heat relaxes my bones. The bathtub is full of fluffy white bubbles, the foam almost spilling over the sides. Bright plastic toys float on top, and a pink bath crayon rests on the rim.
“Arms up,” he says softly.
I raise my arms, and he lifts me into the bath. I let out a breathy sigh and sink down, my muscles loosening instantly. It’s heaven.
Jasper kneels beside the tub, rolling up his sleeves. Even though I’m already quickly slipping into Little Space, I can’t help the throbbing between my legs at the sight of his tattooed forearms.
He cups his hand, pours warm water over my shoulders, then massages shampoo into my scalp with slow, gentle circles. His fingers comb through my hair, his touch firm but tender.
“Play,” he instructs firmly, handing me a squeaky fish.
I smile and give it a halfhearted squeeze, bubbles popping against my fingers. He washes my back with a soft cloth, the rhythmic strokes lulling me deeper into calm.
When the bath is over, because I’m nearly falling asleep, he wraps me in one of his plush towels and lifts me from the tub. My head rests against his chest, damp hair clinging to my forehead. I can hear his heartbeat as he carries me to the playroom. The space is dim with only the string of star lights twinkling across the ceiling.
He lays me on the changing table, the vinyl cover cool against my back. He dries me with patient care, dabbing along my arms and legs, then opens a small drawer and holds up a pacifier. Pink, with a rainbow on the shield.
“Open.”
I part my lips. The silicone slips into my mouth, and I instinctively start to suckle. I still feel shy sucking on my pacifier in front of him—but it’s soothing, like everything else fades to the background.
He dusts baby powder across my stomach and thighs, the scent instantly pulling me into a smaller headspace. Then he lifts my legs and slides a thick, crinkly diaper beneath me. The rustling echoes in the quiet room, and I’m glad the lights are dim because my cheeks are surely bright red. He fastens it snugly, his fingers grazing my hips.
I shift slightly. The bulk between my legs feels strange… But safe. Soft.
He pulls a pale-yellow onesie over my head. It snaps at the crotch, and then he pulls fuzzy socks onto my feet—pink ones with little polka dots.
By the time he’s done, I don’t feel like the girl who lived in a camper, who stole to eat, who slept with a knife under her pillow.
I feel like someone new.
Someone cherished.
I feel small.
I feel safe.
And I’ve never felt happier.
* * *
I burst through Jasper’s open office door, barely able to contain the words bubbling in my chest. My heart is pounding, my cheeks ache from smiling, and I can’t hold it in any longer.
“I got a job!” I practically yell, my voice echoing off the walls.
Jasper looks up from his laptop, his brows lifting in surprise. His mouth opens, but before he can say a word, I’m already in his arms. He catches me effortlessly, pulling me onto his lap, his work on his laptop forgotten.
“You got a job?” he repeats, his voice thick with pride and disbelief.
I nod quickly, my legs bouncing on either side of his thighs. “Yes! I got the call just now.”
He cups my face in his hands and kisses me, full and hard. “That’s amazing, baby. Where?”
I practically squeal. “The coffee shop. The one where we met.”
His grin deepens, and I can feel his chest puff with pride beneath me. “You’re kidding.”
“Nope,” I say, breathless. “I start in two days. They said I was sweet, and they liked my energy.”
He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, his thumb brushing my cheek. “I’m so damn proud of you.”
I suck in a shaky breath as the emotion wells fast and full in my throat. “Thank you,” I whisper. “For supporting me. For helping me get here. I know you don’t love the idea of me being away from you, but?—”
He cuts me off with a soft kiss to my temple. “I’d do anything for you, rainbow. Anything, as long as it’s safe. And a job in a coffee shop? That’s pretty safe. Doesn’t mean I won’t be there watching over you, but I’d do that anywhere.”
Tears burn at the corners of my eyes, but I nod and lean into him, soaking in the moment. I’ve never felt this proud of myself before. Not once. But now? I feel like I’m glowing.
“I want to go tell Cassian!” I exclaim, jumping off his lap. “He told me at breakfast this morning he had a strong feeling I’d get a call today about a job.”
Jasper laughs as he stands, grabbing his keys from the desk. “Then let’s go tell him.”
We walk together to Cassian’s house, and I’m practically skipping beside Jasper. The moment the front door opens, I blurt, “I got a job!”
Cassian blinks at me, stunned for a beat, and then his entire face lights up. “Fuck yes! Way to go, Little one.”
Before I know it, I’m lifted off the ground in a dizzying spin as Cassian twirls me around, laughing. “I knew you could do it, Ari!”
I hug him tight, laughing breathlessly as he sets me down. “Thank you!”
Cassian leans back, his eyes gleaming with reverence. “We have to celebrate. All of us. Drinks. Food. Everything.”
I clap my hands, bouncing on my toes. “Yes! Let’s do it!”
I glance at Jasper, who looks less than thrilled about the idea, but he doesn’t argue. Instead, he raises an eyebrow, sighs dramatically, and nods. “Fine. But only one drink. Two if you’re eating something with it.”
Cassian’s already pulling out his phone, typing fast. “Texting the fam. One hour. Meet at our favorite bar.”
I beam at both of them, my heart so full it feels like it might burst.
This is what it feels like to have people rooting for you. To have family.
And it means the world to me.
* * *
T he bar is alive .
Bodies sway, laughter roars, and the pulse of bass-heavy music thumps like a second heartbeat inside my chest. The air smells of beer, strong cologne, and warm bodies. The lights are low and golden, spilling over the worn wooden floors and flickering off the shiny bottles lining the shelves behind the bar. It’s crowded, buzzing with several different celebrations.
Jasper stands beside me, one arm wrapped tightly around my waist, anchoring me to him like he always does. As if he’s afraid I might disappear if he doesn’t. I can feel the tension in his body—his spine rigid, jaw clenched. He hasn’t had any of his drink, his eyes constantly scanning the room like a hawk circling the sky.
“Are you okay?” I ask, leaning in, my voice barely heard over the music.
He gives a small bob of the head, his gaze never stopping. “Just keeping an eye out.”
And he is. Always watching. Always guarding. He doesn’t relax—not really. It seems as if none of them do. Eventually, after a few uneventful songs and a little help from Cassian, who claps him on the back and presses a beer into his hand, some of his edge fades. Jasper finally takes a sip, and I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding. I’ve learned a lot about Jasper since I’ve met him, but the biggest thing I’ve figured out is that he’s so dang protective over the people he cares about.
I turn to the dance floor, where Ember and Rowie are already waiting, swaying to the rhythm. He releases me, though reluctantly. The second I join them, I feel the beat ripple through me, from the soles of my shoes to the tips of my fingers. The music is electric, the lights spinning in slow and dreamy patterns above our heads.
We dance. We laugh. We hold hands and spin in circles until we’re breathless. It’s the first time I’ve ever been in a bar for fun. No darting eyes. No hunger. No plans to steal or run. I just get to enjoy.
Every few minutes, I glance back, and there he is.
My Daddy, leaning against the bar with that unreadable expression, watching me like I’m the only thing that matters. Each time our eyes meet, I run back to him, throw my arms around his neck, and kiss him. He always catches me, always kisses me back like he’s been waiting, and then he releases me to go back to dancing.
The other girls and I are covered in sweat, but we don’t care. Every time we think we might be done, another amazing song comes on and we can’t tear ourselves away from the dance floor.
Then, everything in the room seems to shift.
The door bursts open, and a large group of guys swagger in, loud, laughing too hard, their energy obnoxious. Shouts rise over the music. Glasses clink too sharply. The lights somehow feel harsher now.
The joyful hum turns sharp with tension. Voices get louder. A drink spills. A chair scrapes too hard. And then?—
Chaos.
A brawl erupts. Fists swing. People scream. Glass shatters. Tables topple.
“Jasper!” I scream, panic clawing up my throat.
I see him try to get to me, but bodies slam between us, sending me farther apart from him.
I turn, but Ember and Rowie are being pushed, shoved, and pulled in different directions. I reach for them, my hands flailing.
“Rowie! Ember!”
No answer. Only the roar of the crowd.
I’m barged hard and stumble backward, pushing through the chaos, slipping between shouting strangers until I find a hallway near the bathrooms that’s mostly empty.
I stagger into it, gasping, heart hammering.
And slam into someone.
I freeze. The scent hits me first—cheap beer and stale cigarettes. Then the voice.
“You.”
My blood turns to ice.
It’s him. The man from the parking lot. The one I knocked to the ground. The one I hoped to never see again.
He grabs me before I can turn, his fingers clawing into my arms. “You think you can humiliate me? You think you can just walk away?” he snarls, his breath hot and bitter in my face. “You’re going to pay for what you did, you little bitch.”
I scream, thrashing, trying to pull free. “Let go of me!”
He shakes me hard, and my teeth clack together. I scratch at his arms, kick at his shins, but he doesn’t budge. He yanks me by the hair and drags me toward the back door, kicking it open. Before he pulls me outside, I slip my hand in his pocket and do the only thing I can think of.
I steal.
His wallet.
And then I toss it onto the floor in the hallway.
Cold night air slices across my bare legs. The alley is narrow, cloaked in shadow and silence. The distant noise of the bar fades behind us.
I fight like hell.
I kick. I twist. I scream until my throat burns. “Jasper!”
No answer.
The man drags me deeper into the alley, slamming me into a brick wall. My head hits hard, and for a second, the world tilts.
“You’re gonna learn what happens to girls who fuck with me,” he growls.
I sob, my hands tearing at his, my legs trying to gain footing. Panic floods every nerve in my body, my heart beating so fast it hurts.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t move.
And all I want is my Daddy.