Chapter 36 Elle #2
A lump forms in my throat, singeing the tendons inside. That word, “fail,” again. He used it when he told me about his sister in the observatory, and it’d felt like he’d placed a cinder block on my chest without warning.
I know what it’s like to crumble beneath the weight of your perceived failures. How easily everything can shatter if you don’t succeed in your dreams.
“What exactly is Death’s Teeth? Everyone keeps saying they’re this secret organization, and I’ve read about their supposed vigilantism and sex parties in the school’s periodicals, but there’s not much written about them. Are they…actually dangerous?”
“Yes.” He leans back, pressing his lips into a firm line, studying me with that gemstone gaze that makes my insides flutter, as if wondering how much he should tell me.
“Death’s Teeth was born out of fear. An initiative to restore faith and order in the town after Cronus Anderson debauched it with his greed and bloodlust. Some say they concocted the whole prophecy about your family, planting seeds in the minds of our people to make them hate the ancestral line, because they needed someone to blame for the death and sickness. ”
“And what do you say?”
“I wouldn’t put it past them. These days, they front as a vigilante terror group, made untouchable by their blood oaths and anonymity. It’s not a very large organization, you’ll notice, as it would be very difficult to maintain their secrecy otherwise.”
“If everyone knows about them, how are they a secret?”
“The secret’s in the identities of the individuals. Even I don’t know everyone. Only the Director does.”
Tilting my head, I peer at him. “What’s your role? Are you… Do you participate in the sex stuff?”
Something passes over his face, and he seems to shut down, withdrawing from the conversation. “Death Incarnate. Their leader, essentially. The one they want to maintain order and…pick who dies.”
“Who dies?” My stomach flips, panic seizing my bones.
“They use sacrifice to appease the god they’ve erected. Incarnate and his Maiden act as a vessel connecting life and death, and the sacrifices keep the cycle going. Well, that and the sex.”
“So it’s all true then? All the rumors, all the stuff people whisper about?” I swallow, trying to make sense of the information and wondering just how Jean-Louis ties in. “That day in the forest…”
“I had nothing to do with whatever that was. Until last night, I was doing my best to keep my involvement at a minimum.” he says, his jaw flexing.
“Though this is why I advised you to stay out of the forest. I was trying to keep you away from them. Said I’d investigate the new girl myself just to keep them off your trail. ”
“But why exactly? What do they want with me specifically?”
“It’s not that they want you. It’s that they’d go out of their way to keep you from being my Maiden.
” He grabs an apricot from the fruit bowl on the corner of his desk, rolling it in his hands.
“The very first Incarnate and Maiden are rumored to have been Cronus and Manon Dupont. That was why they wore masks: to obscure his involvement. The current members are fearful of what it’d mean to have history repeat itself in that way, especially since they believe your family wants to destroy Avernia as an institution anyway, which would cut off all their power in Fury Hill. ”
I sit forward, wrapping my arms around my stomach. I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t dredging up all the terrible memories I’ve worked so hard at ignoring and that it didn’t feel like I’m in way over my head here.
Maybe I should tuck tail and run. Rid myself of the problems once and for all. No way would any of this touch me under my parents’ watch. Dad would never let it.
But that would mean abandoning Sutton and my siblings to fend for themselves, and I don’t want to be the girl who only cares about herself anymore.
“You can’t leave, can you?” I ask softly. “That’s why you were there last night, why you participate. Why you said you’d be their leader officially.”
“Yes. But something you should know, Elle, is that no one who joins gets to leave. You’re in it for life, which is why I’m sorry for dragging you into this.
Had I not intervened last night, they’d have…
” He trails off, squeezing the fruit until it starts to smush, juices spilling over his fingers.
“The harm they would have caused as some sort of message… I would not have been able to bear it. I am not a strong enough man to stand idly by while you suffer.”
The cut on Sabrina’s shoulder flashes in my mind. Would it have been worse for me, being an Anderson?
“It isn’t your fault,” I say, the urge to mention that it’s his father’s on the tip of my tongue, but he stalks around the desk, gripping my chin in one hand before I can.
He forces me to look up, meeting his eyes. “It is though. Do you understand exactly what I’ve forced you into?”
I swallow. “It’s just role-play, right?”
“No.” He plants his hands on the arms of my chair, leaning down until his green eyes look like flames, burning bright enough to see from outer space.
“It isn’t. The Maiden belongs to Incarnate.
It’s the equivalent of a marriage pact. An oath bound by consuming each other’s blood, then marked by sex before the Director and her cronies. ”
My breath hitches when he toys with a piece of my hair. The way he reaches out tentatively, a hesitance lacing his actions, and gently takes a strand between his fingers.
“It isn’t technically legal, but the city would uphold it regardless. Especially for a Dupont.” He looks up, meeting my gaze once more. “There’s a reason I’ve never wished to fulfill the Incarnate position, other than the fact that it requires sentencing innocent people to their demise.”
But I just forced his hand.
His jaw clenches, a muscle thumping as he averts his eyes. I reach out, softly flattening my palm against his cheek and chin, and pull his face back toward me.
“This is not something I can ask you to take on,” he says in a low voice, lacing his fingers through mine. “I didn’t want you near any of this.”
“I’m a lot more resilient than you think. Maybe it won’t be so bad.”
“The Maiden holds Incarnate’s heart in her hands. She is required not to break it.”
Why does it feel like we’re not talking about Death’s Teeth anymore?
“Because of the oath,” I supply, breathless.
His gaze dips to my mouth. “Yes. The oath.”
I lick my lips, my chest heating at the implication.
His movement is staggered as he leans in, swallowing thickly.
I twist my fingers in my lap to keep from grabbing him, forcing myself to wait patiently for once.
It’s been so long since we last kissed that I’m starting to forget the slant of his lips on mine, the force of his breath against my chin, my nose—
A knock on the office door sends us springing apart; Sutton launches to the other side of the room, immediately snatching a stack of papers as a blond faculty member sticks her head in.
“Hey, Sutton, could I borrow you for a moment? We’re having trouble getting one of the curtains down in the back auditorium.”
Clearing his throat, he nods stiffly, shoving the papers into my lap. “Ms. Anderson, please see to it that your rewritten essay follows the format I laid out. I have rules in place for a reason.”
Shame burns the edges of my face. “Yes, sir.”
He doesn’t linger, sliding past his desk toward the waiting woman. Leaving me totally alone.