4
Instead of a repurposed mansion or a hotel ballroom or a rented church, they had chosen this: a meadow in the mountains, the grass the new green of spring, wildflowers breaking out in bursts of color.
The sky was clear, blue thinning to white, and the sun was so bright that higher up the slopes, past the tree line, the worn stone of the mountains looked almost white, and the snow caps left an after image in Jem’s vision.
They’d kept everything simple; you had to hike half a mile from the parking lot, which meant it had to be simple.
A few decorations—a white arch and folding chairs, arrangements of native flowers, a stretch of white carpet to form the aisle.
Tean’s brothers had packed everything in.
Hannah had taken care of the flowers. Tinajas had offered the carpet.
“Isn’t it bad luck to see each other before the wedding?” Jem whispered to Tean as the music started. Not a professional quartet—Tean’s two sisters, along with a niece and a nephew. Jem found himself tugging on the collar of his shirt. The day was warm, and with the sun, he was starting to sweat.
“We drove here together,” Tean said. Somehow—even Jem wasn’t sure how—he’d talked Tean into a tan suit, and it looked perfect against the soft brown of his skin.
And Daniel had managed to make Tean’s hair look mature, even stylish, while still somehow maintaining the messy wildness that was Teancum Leon.
“We got dressed together. We walked here together from the parking lot.”
“Right, but is it bad luck for us to see each other right now?”
Tean glanced at him like he might say something, but then he smiled. He smoothed the shoulders of Jem’s suit—navy, and the first suit Jem had ever bought for himself. Tean’s hand came up to cup Jem’s cheek, and he said quietly, “I always thought you made your own luck.”
The music changed, and Milo started up the aisle with Scipio.
In spite of Tean’s concerns, the Lab was off his leash, which meant that getting Scipio all the way to the arch involved a lot of side quests as Scipio sniffed, wandered, and checked out the people on both sides of the aisle.
Milo loved every minute of it; he had the biggest smile Jem had ever seen as he nudged, called, and whistled for Scipio.
Eventually, though, both boy and dog made it.
And then it was Maeve’s turn, and the quartet began to play what Maeve continued to call her song.
Jem hadn’t been sure what to expect—with Maeve, at her current age, anything from a brawl with Milo to a hysterical meltdown over clothes were possibilities.
But Maeve made her way down the aisle calmly, smiling at the people around her as she tossed petals onto the carpet.
The flowers were blue flax, and they looked like pieces of the sky against the white carpet.
And then they were ready. On either side of the archway, the groomspeople were lined up and waiting.
On Tean’s side, his brother Seth stood with Daniel—who had, in spite of all his teasing and threats and Pinterest boards to the contrary, decided to wear a black suit, and not a cropped tuxedo shirt with the word SLUT spray-painted onto it.
He’d been so happy when Tean had asked him to be a groomsman that he’d forgotten to be a little bitch for two full days.
Next to him was Hannah, in a sand-colored dress that set off her auburn hair, smiling so hard the lines around her eyes deepened.
On Jem’s side, Tinajas looked stunning in an emerald dress that was—even by Tinajas’s standards—cut shockingly low.
A lot of the guys, especially the ones on Tean’s side of the aisle, seemed to be having a hard time looking away from all that real estate.
Next to Tinajas, Milo, Scipio, and Maeve rounded out the people Jem had asked to stand with him.
When Jem glanced over, Tean’s eyes were wet. He smiled at whatever he saw in Jem’s face, blinked to clear away the tears, and took Jem’s hand. “Ready?”
And Jem meant to say, Ready. But what came out of his mouth was “Always.”
Hannah stepped over to the archway and said, “Please rise.”
Their friends and family stood.
The music changed again.
And Jem and Tean walked down the aisle.
Hannah was crying a little, and when the music stopped, she laughed and said, “I can’t get this emotional already.
” An easy laugh rolled through the gathering, and the line of Tean’s shoulders softened.
“I’m so happy to be here with all of you today as we celebrate Tean and Jem.
I’d like to begin by saying a few words about each of them.
” She drew a breath. “Tean has been my friend for more years than I want to count. He’s such a special person.
He’s sensitive and thoughtful. He cares so much about everything—about the people in his life, about the world we live in, about the big questions that we should all probably worry about a little more.
He has such a gentle soul.” Her voice was thick as she added, “I love him. From the minute he met Jem, I knew something important was happening. And it’s been one of the most wonderful things in my life to see the best person I know find someone who brings him so much joy. ”
They were probably supposed to be looking at Hannah, but Jem was looking at Tean, at the bushy eyebrows and the big glasses and the dark eyes. At the full mouth that was smiling now. And maybe Tean sensed him looking, because he glanced over, and he mouthed, “Yes.”
“And Jem,” Hannah said. “What do I say about Jem?”
“Something good,” Jem prompted.
Another laugh rolled through the crowd.
“I hope you’ve all had a chance to meet him,” Hannah said.
“I’ve loved getting to know him, and I think I understand, a little, what Tean sees in him.
Jem is funny and kind. He’s talented in so many ways.
He helped me when I was in a very difficult spot in my life, without judging me, without making me feel less.
I think that’s one of Jem’s gifts. He makes everyone he talks to feel special.
And as I’ve watched him with Tean, I’ve loved seeing how Tean grounds him, how Tean gives him a chance to turn off, to be himself. ”
Jem caught Tean’s eye and mouthed, “Yes.”
“The grooms have written their own vows,” Hannah said. “I’m going to ask you to take each other’s hands. And now Tean, would you like to go first?”
Tean cleared his throat. His eyes were wet again.
“Jem, when I asked you to marry me, I asked you how I ever did life without you. I meant that. I don’t know how I used to do this, be in the world, move through it day by day, make a life without you.
I also know that love is more than a feeling.
Love is a choice we make. And we make it every day. Nietzsche says—”
Jem groaned. His knees bent. He sagged a little.
Laughing, Tean continued, “—we can only promise the actions of love. So, I promise to choose you. And I promise to cherish you. And I promise to help you with your dreams and your goals and however you want to grow, because you’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met, and I can’t wait to see what you do and where you go and who you become over the rest of your life.
” He swallowed, and when he spoke again, his voice was thick.
“Shingleback lizards spend most of their lives alone. But every year, they find their mate again. Their mate for life. And when they’re together, they do what’s called co-basking—soaking up the sun, touching each other, strengthening that bond.
Puffins do it too. They spend their winters apart, but they always find each other again, and when they do, they do what’s called billing—touching their bills, inspecting each other, reaffirming their connection.
” The next words were tight, like he could barely get them out.
“Albatrosses, when they find their mate again, do a secret dance.”
Jem’s eyes stung, but he laughed, and he didn’t care if he wasn’t supposed to, or if he was breaking a rule, or if now wasn’t the time. He let his head tip forward until his forehead rested against Tean’s. And then he whispered, “Like our secret handshake when we bump butts.”
Laughing and crying, Tean wiped his cheeks. “Exactly like that. I promise that I’ll always find you, Jem. That even if life is hard, and it feels like we’re being pulled in different directions, I’ll always come back to you. I love you, and I’m so happy I get to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Voice soft, Hannah said, “Jem?”
At first, he couldn’t say anything. All he could do was look at Tean; everything else was foggy, but Tean was clear. Finally, he made himself say, “God damn, Tean. Why couldn’t you do a bad job this one time?”
More laughter. Tean was still trying to stop his tears.
“I love you,” Jem said. “I met you, and I did everything wrong from the very beginning, and somehow, I lucked out, because even though I screwed up, you still let me be part of your life.” He stopped.
The sun had shifted, maybe, because the light was in his eyes, and he had to blink.
“I didn’t have a family when I was growing up.
I didn’t have a home.” He tried to make his voice light. “I didn’t have a dog.”
A few laughs, maybe. He wasn’t sure. He couldn’t hear anything.
“I spent my whole life being somebody else,” Jem said, “and then I met you, and suddenly I was me. You saw the real me even before I knew what was happening. And it didn’t freak you out, any of it.
How I’d grown up. What I did. Who I was.
” He wanted to say, The fact that I couldn’t read.
But he couldn’t. Tean’s smile trembled, though, like maybe he’d heard it anyway, and his hands tightened around Jem’s.
“I’m so grateful you’re letting me be part of your life. ”
“We’re part of each other’s lives,” Tean whispered.
Jem felt the smile start on his face. “I’m so grateful that I get to love you.
I promise you that I will do everything I can, for the rest of my life, to live up to that trust. I promise I’ll be better about chores.
I promise I’ll figure out that new harness for Scipio. I promise I’ll eat less McDonald’s.”
That was when Daniel said, “Oh my God,” and the congregation cracked up again.
Quietly, for Tean alone, Jem said, “I promise no more lying.”
Tean blinked back tears and nodded.
“I love you, Teancum Leon,” Jem said. “You’re my family. You’re my home.”
Hannah was dabbing at her cheeks. “Those were beautiful vows. Thank you both. Everyone here loves and supports you, and we’re so happy to see you enter this next stage of your lives. Now for the important part. Tean, do you take Jem to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
“I do,” Tean said scratchily.
“Jem, do you take Tean to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
Jem was nodding before she’d even finished, and he caught Tinajas grinning, and it made him grin too. “I do.”
“Then, by the authority vested in me by the laws of the State of Utah, I pronounce you husband and husband.” She waited a beat and added, “Now I believe we’d all like to see a kiss.”
Tean’s bushy eyebrows shot up.
With a smirk, Jem leaned in. “I think we can take care of that.”