Chapter 14
KANE
I don’t know where to start.
Not with Jess stretched across the bed like a priceless treasure in front of me.
She’s gorgeous, no doubt. From her sweetly flaring hips to her narrow waist and the luscious swell of her breasts that she always hides beneath concealing clothes.
But it’s not just her body that takes my breath away.
Laying there in just those sexy panties and bra, allowing me to restrain her, leaving her vulnerable… it’s the most trust I’ve ever received. And I feel so damn lucky, I’m almost paralyzed by it.
I want her. Badly.
But I want to make sure she enjoys everything. That she doesn’t know a moment of doubt or insecurity. That she doesn’t regret handing her trust over to me.
“Kane?” There’s a hint of concern in Jess’s voice. Her chest rises and falls as she takes a deep breath. “Is everything okay?”
Belatedly, I realize I’ve been staring at her long enough to make her nervous, which is the exact opposite of what I want.
Climbing onto the bed, I brace myself above Jess and cover her lips with mine, tracing my tongue along the seam of them before briefly dipping inside. “Everything’s more than fine, sweetheart. I was just looking at you.”
“Looking at me?”
“Looking is the wrong word,” I amend. I trail a line of kisses along her jaw and down past the pattern of scars on her neck. “More like admiring. Thinking about how damn gorgeous you are. And how lucky I am to be with you.”
“Kane.”
“It’s true.” Continuing my way down her body, I press soft kisses along her collarbone, memorizing the feel of her satin skin on my lips. “That you’re trusting me with this.” My mouth moves to that perfect constellation of freckles on her breast, tracing the imaginary lines with my tongue.
Then I take a nipple into my mouth, suckling and laving at it. Jess arches her back on a gasp, instinctively thrusting her breast towards me.
Once the fabric covering her nipple is soaked, I move on to the other, paying it the same attention as the first.
While I hold myself above her with one arm, I use the other to explore the filmy fabric between her thighs. Already damp with arousal, I can feel her opening for me. Inviting me in .
I sink one finger into her slick heat, reveling in the sensation of her inner muscles clutching at me.
In the sounds she makes. In the way her hips jerk with every plunge and the muscles in her belly quiver.
In the breathtaking picture she makes, all creamy skin and soft curves and a spill of dark hair against the pale blue comforter I bought just for her.
Because after the first night Jess had a nightmare and ended up sleeping in my bedroom with me, I knew I needed to make the space nicer. More welcoming. My ten-year-old gray comforter and stark white blinds wouldn’t make Jess feel comfortable, nor would the cold hardwood floor.
So now I have a plush shag rug in shades of blue, sheer cream curtains hiding the basic blinds, a luxurious down comforter, plus enough pillows for at least ten people to sleep on.
Could I have ever imagined myself decorating my bedroom for a woman before?
No. But that was before I met Jess. Before I discovered how incredible it feels to make her smile. To know I’ve made her happy.
Releasing her nipple with a little pop, I kiss my way down her stomach, pausing at that other little freckle near her bellybutton.
Adding a second finger to the first, I keep pumping them into her. Curving them so they hit that little spot deep inside, the one that makes Jess moan whenever I touch it. Then I bring my mouth to her exposed bundle of nerves and suck hard. A rush of arousal hits my tongue, sweet and heady.
Already painfully hard, an insistent pressure builds. A desperate need to be inside Jess, to be joined with her in every way possible. To feel her wrapped tightly around me, clutching at me with each thrust and drawing my own pleasure out.
Jess’s hips jolt as I flick my tongue at her little bud, so I place my other hand across her belly, nearly spanning it as I hold her down.
“Kane,” she moans. “Oh. This…”
I lift my head from the apex of her thighs. “What, sweetheart?”
“I never imagined. That not being able to see or touch you could feel like this.” Her cheeks flush a pretty pink. “Everything feels more…”
“Intense?”
“Yes…” She trails off, her head falling back against the pillow as I pull my fingers out and plunge them deep again. “Oh, Kane. This is…”
“Perfect,” I murmur, then dip my mouth to her silken warmth. “You’re perfect, Jess. Every inch of you.”
“No. You…” Jess pauses. Sucks in a breath. “I can picture you. So handsome. Sexy. Your muscles flexing as you hold yourself up. Your hair all tousled and that look in your eyes.”
“What look?”
The flush on her cheeks deepens, but she says, “That hungry look. Like you can’t wait to be with me.”
“Ah, Jess. I can’t wait to be with you. Every time.”
“Then…” She stops. Her legs fall open. “Can you? Not just with your fingers. But all of you.”
“I love it when you tell me what you want,” I say. My voice is practically a growl. Need surges through me, demanding everything.
Jess writhes beneath me, caught in a hurricane of sensations. “I want you,” she breathes. “Will you, Kane? I love feeling you touch me, but when you’re inside me… it’s… I can’t explain it. It’s beyond words.”
Fuck.
All my plans for hours of foreplay fall away in an instant.
How can I consider anything but giving Jess what she wants?
“Okay, sweetheart.” I move so I’m notched at her center, my erection prodding at her slick, velvety skin. “I was going to make you come a few times first, but if this is?—”
“Yes.” Her legs fall open. “Yes, Kane. I want you inside me. Now.”
My breath stalls.
On an exhale, I tell her, “I think that’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”
Jess’s lips curve into a shyly satisfied smile. “Good.”
I capture her lips once again, catching a hint of wine from earlier tonight mixed with the indescribable, addictive taste of Jess’s excitement. Framing her jaw, I tilt her head back to take the kiss even deeper. A low moan rumbles up from the back of her throat.
Then I sink into her in one smooth thrust.
Her muscles convulse around me.
Jess makes the most incredible sound—half moan, half whimper—as she wraps her legs around my hips, pulling me even deeper.
“You feel so good,” she whispers. “Like you’re made for me.”
My heart slams against my chest. Expands until I’m breathless.
“I know,” I tell her. “I feel the same way. ”
And then I show her how much of a perfect fit we are.
Our bodies crashing together in a frenzy of need. My hands all over Jess’s body; caressing. Treasuring. Memorizing the feel of each perfect detail.
First slowly, then faster, I plunge into her tight heat.
Electricity sparks all through my body. Every touch, every thrust, urging me closer to ecstasy.
It would be so easy to finish, balanced on the precipice like this. But I’ll never, ever finish first. No matter how desperately my body wants me to.
Instead, I focus on Jess. On the flush across her heaving breasts. On her slightly parted lips. On the whimpers that keep escaping from them. On her beautiful face. On those rosy nipples that practically call to me to take them into my mouth.
And I focus on how she feels around me. The glide of her walls against my sensitized skin. The way she squeezes her inner muscles just so, having figured out just how much I like it.
I can feel her getting close, so I increase my speed. Plunging deep, bottoming out with each stroke, lifting her hips so I can hit that spot I know drives her wild.
“Kane,” she groans. “I’m so close.”
“Good.” I kiss her again. “Come for me, then.”
Then I reach between us and flick her swollen bud.
I pull nearly out before slamming back home again.
Jess makes a keening sound as she flies into space. Her hands fist. Her inner walls clamp tightly around me. Her mouth falls into a little O of ecstasy.
And that’s all it takes.
Permission granted .
With one more stroke, I bury myself to the hilt, my seed pulsing hot as it fills her.
And with it, an image of Jess carrying our child.
Could we? Would she?
Is it too soon to be considering such things?
Then again, who’s the timekeeper? Who’s to dictate when? Some vague concept cobbled together from books and movies and things some of my single friends have said?
Or should I listen to my heart? My heart that’s yelling, She’s the one!
My heart that knows the truth even when my brain hasn’t wanted to admit it.
Still joined, I carefully reach up to untie the scarves around Jess’s wrists. Then I slide the blindfold off her head, meeting golden green eyes still glazed with desire.
She blinks at me before a satisfied smile appears. “That was…”
“Perfect?”
Her smile widens. “Yes. Perfect.” A beat, and then, “I really liked the blindfold.”
Though it would seem impossible, I feel myself twitch inside her.
“Again?” she asks with a laugh.
“Soon.” Reluctantly, I pull away, missing Jess the moment our connection breaks. “First, let me get a washcloth. And then I have something else for you.”
“Something else? You mean more sex?”
“No,” I call over my shoulder as I hurry to the bathroom. “Well. Yes. But after.”
Once I get Jess cleaned up, I grab a few extra pillows and tuck them behind her back, then pull the covers up to her waist. Her breasts have tiny marks from my kisses, and I graze my fingers across one of them. “Sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to?—”
Her hand covers mine. “No. I like them. Whenever I see them it reminds me. And…” Jess blushes. “It feels like you marked me. Like I’m yours. Maybe that’s not what an independent woman is supposed to say…”
My heart flips over again. “You can feel however you want. And trust me, Jess. I have no doubts about your independence. I’m just glad you let me take care of you sometimes.”
Before Jess can respond, I jump up from the bed. “Hang on. I have something for you.”
I can practically feel her gaze on my ass as I cross the room to the dresser. And I fucking love it.
Once I retrieve the cardboard box I’ve had hidden in my sock drawer, I return to Jess’s side. Taking a seat beside her, I readjust the covers so they’re over both of us. Then I hand her the package and say, “One more gift.”
“Kane.” It’s lightly scolding. “You already got me so much. All the new books, and the office chair, and the cashmere sweater… And that’s not even counting the party. That’s already too?—”
“Nothing is too much for you,” I interject. “And besides. This gift is different.”
Wrinkles crease her brow as she looks at me. “Okay?”
Nerves erupt in my stomach. What seemed like a great idea a couple of weeks ago I’m now not as certain about. What if it makes her sad? What if I did something that I had no business getting involved with?
But it’s too late now. Despite my concerns, I can’t exactly take the gift back. So I swallow hard against my rising nerves and say, “I really hope this is okay. If you don’t like it, I can… I don’t know. Fix it.”
Except I can’t. Not with this. So I really, really hope I didn’t screw up.
Jess lifts off the lid of the box and peers down at the layers of bubble wrap within. Then, with hesitant fingers, she removes the wrap to reveal what’s inside.
For a few moments, as she stares at it, my breath stops.
Then she pulls out the glass figure with a trembling hand. The glass lobster that’s no longer in pieces, but all together again, albeit with a few faint lines where the breaks were fused.
“Kane.” Tears shine in her eyes. “Is this…”
“Your mom’s lobster. I found a guy who does glassblowing, and he thought he could fix it. I mean, it’s not perfect, you can still see the lines where it broke, but I thought it was better than before. And you could put it on display again.”
Jess sets the lobster back in the box and sets it aside. When she looks back at me, a few tears trickle down her cheeks.
Shit. My heart falls.
“I’m sorry,” I hurry to say. “I didn’t mean… I thought you’d be happy. But if I fucked up… shit. I’ll do whatever I can to fix it. I don’t know what, but I’ll do it.”
“No, don’t apologize.” Jess sniffs. “It’s wonderful. I’m just crying because… I never imagined. This is the most perfect gift. I can’t believe you thought of this. That you remembered.”
Relief seeps in, making it easier to breathe. “I remember everything about you, Jess. How you like your coffee. Your favorite cities in Tenebris Veil . The type of flower you like best. And how much this lobster means to you.”
“Kane.” Jess flings her arms around me and buries her face in my neck. She just sits like that for a few seconds, her heart racing against mine. Then she tilts her head back to meet my gaze. “Thank you. So much. I can’t even explain how much this means.”
“I’d do anything for you.” I brush my lips across hers. “Anything to make you happy. To see you smile. To make sure you know?—”
But saying I care about Jess isn’t enough. It’s too small to describe the intensity of my feelings for her.
“I love you,” I blurt out. “I want you to know how much I love you. I know it hasn’t been that long, but I can’t help how I feel. But it’s okay if you’re not there yet. Or if you… shit. I can’t say I don’t want you to love me. But?—”
“I do.” She frames my face with her hands. Emotion runs deep in her eyes. “I love you, Kane. And I don’t care how long we’ve been together. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is how I feel when I’m with you.”
A burst of joy fills my chest. “And how do you feel?”
“Happier than I’ve ever been.” Jess snuggles closer to me. Her gaze is steady on mine. “It feels like the broken parts of me are healing because of you.”
Oh.
My heart.
Gathering her into my arms, I lift Jess into my lap and press my lips to her forehead. “I’ve never felt happier, either.”
“Kane.” She turns her head to kiss my jaw.
“Yes? ”
“I really love you.”
“Jess. I love you, too.”
She pauses. Traces a little heart on my chest with her finger. “Thank you for making this the best birthday ever.”
“Sweetheart.” I roll her nipple between my fingers. “We’re not done yet. I’ll get you a snack, and then I plan on making you come at least three more times.” I stop. “Unless you’d rather go to sleep?”
Jess glances at the clock on the nightstand before smiling at me. “No way. It’s only ten. I still have two more hours of birthday left.”
“Good.” My hand moves between her thighs, lazily stroking. “I’m going to enjoy giving you a few more gifts, then.”
Her smile broadens. “That sounds perfect .”