Chapter 12
Gemma: Please tell me you’re going to let me watch you work sometime.
Luna: Like in the engine room?
Gemma: Yep. PLEASE tell me you wear a sexy tank top and cargo pants or overalls while you do your thing.
Luna: Heh. You’ve clearly been imagining this.
Gemma: You all sexy and sweaty while you make that engine your bitch? Fuck yeah, I have.
Luna: You are giving me ALL kinds of naughty ideas…
Gemma: That was kind of the point. *grinning face emoji*
—Sent via FLIRTT (Frequency Link for Interstellar Real-Time Transmission)
Luna
After dinner, Gemma goes off with Felix for some brother-sister talk time and I head to the ship’s lounge room to do some thinking too.
Gemma’s been quiet and contemplative ever since Felix announced his animal rescue operation plans going forward, so I know she’s got a lot on her mind.
Agreeing to join us on the Sleigh Belle was a sudden decision, one that didn’t give her a lot of time to consider all the details.
Gemma simply followed her big, beautiful heart—wanting to be with her brother and, of course, me.
Sweet Goddess Thekmis, she’s so fucking awesome. I know how monumental and life-altering that choice was. But I also don’t want Gemma to feel pressured about deciding what to do with her life now. Hopefully, Felix is reinforcing what I told her.
I always anticipated Gemma would want to discover her own new purpose aboard our ship.
From the very earliest of our FLIRTT system communications, I knew she would never be satisfied simply tagging along for the ride.
I’m confident she’ll figure this all out, but I wish there was more I could do to ease any worries she might have.
I’m startled out of my reverie when Sasha joins me to stare out at the universe from the room’s panoramic window.
He flops down in the armchair beside me. “That view never ceases to amaze me. Not even in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine this is where I’d end up one day.”
“Any regrets?” I can’t help but ask.
He grins. “Fuck no. I mean, I do miss this great little taco truck I used to hit up on my way home from work a lot, but I’m managing to hold it together.”
I roll my eyes. “Dude, I’m being serious.”
“So the fuck am I. Tacos are life.” His hazel eyes squint at me. “Let me guess. You’re having a freak-out moment and worrying that Gemma regrets joining us?”
I squirm guiltily in my chair.
He facepalms. “Luna, she’s barely been here a full day! It’s too early to have regrets. Besides, she seems to be fitting in well. I haven’t gotten any vibe of dissatisfaction from her.”
“Neither have I. For all kinds of stupid and illogical reasons, I’m anxious and uncertain. I want her to love it here.”
Fuck, I want her to love me. Aye, there’s the rub.
He quirks a perceptive eyebrow at me, and I have the distinct impression he can read me like a fucking ship’s manual.
“Anyway,” I hurry on to say, “I’m trying to give her some space to think through everything that’s happened so far.”
Sasha nods. “It can be a lot to process. Although she wasn’t abducted the way that I was and knowingly chose to join our ship so that probably makes it a bit easier. Nonetheless, the adjustment to life away from Earth can take time. She’s holding up well from what I’ve seen so far.”
I smile proudly. “Right? She’s so freaking awesome.”
Sasha’s lips twitch. “I do hope you aren’t harboring any illusions that you’re playing it cool right now. You’re a lot like Khephren—your face shows exactly what you’re feeling.”
“Shut the fuck up,” I grumble.
He flippantly gestures toward me. “You’ve got cartoon hearts in your eyes, sweetie. Even your droid could probably figure out that you’re already head over heels for Gemma. Congrats, by the way.”
I bury my face in my hands and groan. “Is it really that obvious?”
“Yep. I will say that I don’t think Gemma’s realized the truth yet. Maybe she’s not ready to. Your relationship’s progressed awfully fast.”
I uncover my face and roll my eyes at him. “Like you’re one to talk. You and Kheph got together in a hot minute.”
Sasha leans back in his chair with a smug grin. “Well, I am pretty fucking irresistible. Poor sweet Khephren couldn’t help himself.”
One of my tentacles darts over and pokes him in his side, where I know he’s ticklish. “You were a grumpy SOB who hated Christmas. It was a mercy mission on Kheph’s part.”
“How very dare you?” he gasps in mock outrage around a laugh.
“You totally deserved that.”
“Yeah, yeah. What I’m trying to say is, don’t worry about it. If you put too much pressure on things, it’s a recipe for disaster. Enjoy the moment and be yourself. She’ll totally fall for you.”
My hearts flutter happily at his words.
“I really hope so because I think I’m already past the point of no return.”
“Duh,” Sasha replies dryly.
“Bitch,” I snark back.
“The baddest one you know,” he agrees proudly.
I lean back in my chair with a sigh. “I’m doing my best not to rush forward as if I’m chasing a shooting star, even though I totally want to. I’m holding myself back so I go at Gemma’s pace.”
“Love hasn’t made you lose sight of all reason, then. Thank fuck.”
“Barely. But that’s because Gemma and I totally have a deep connection I can’t lose. In other words, I don’t want to fuck it all up.”
“Everyone has those kinds of fears. Love is fucking scary. You’re making yourself vulnerable.” He shudders. “Not my favorite, but when you find the right partner, it’s worth it.”
“Seeing how happy you and Kheph have been this past year, and more recently witnessing Najar and Felix fall in love, I’ve yearned to find the same kind of connection with someone. Then, like a gift from Thekmis, Gemma manifested in my life, and I don’t want to lose her.”
“You’re worrying over nothing, but I get it. Love makes you a bit bonkers. You second-guess yourself and angst over the dumbest things. It’s basically like reverting to your hormonal teenage self. Ugh.”
He’s got an annoying point there.
“How did Gemma take your gift? If ever there was a romantic gesture, that was it, my friend.”
I beam. “She loved it, cheesiness and all.” I sigh dreamily. “And she kissed the ever-loving hell out of me at the end.”
I’ve burned that memory into my brain for all time.
Sasha arches an eyebrow. “See? You’re killing it in the relationship department. Quit stressing.”
“I don’t want to seem too needy or codependent.”
Sasha eyes me skeptically. “I can’t imagine you being codependent with anyone.”
I cross my arms over my chest. “Well, you’ve never seen me in love until now, either.”
“Touché.”
“I can get a little… overzealous.”
Sasha snickers. “Yet another way you and Khephren are eerily similar. You’re just a whole hell of a lot snarkier than him.”
My shoulders slump in defeat. I know he’s right. “When I love someone, I want to give them my all, but I can sometimes get too wrapped up in the amazing euphoria love brings.”
“Hmm, understandable,” Sasha says. “Love makes us do wacky shit. Hell, look at me. I fucking hated Christmas until I met Khephren, and while I wouldn’t say I love it in the same way he does, he’s definitely made me a convert. If that ain’t the power of love, I don’t know what is.”
It’s my turn to snicker.
“So what’s your plan?” he asks, leaning back again and folding his hands over his stomach.
I think back on Madam Aurora’s advice. “I’m planning to be as supportive and loving as I can without sending Gemma running for the next solar system.”
“Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help, but I think you’ve got this,” he says, then tilts his head. “Where is Gemma right now?”
“Talking with Felix. Their sibling bond is strong. It will no doubt become even stronger as they travel with us across the universe and they’ve both left their home world behind.”
I’m grateful for that but also illogically envious. Angsty teenage love brain, you suck!
Sasha ruminates on this for a moment. “I suppose that makes a lot of sense. It’s hard for me to fully understand, what with being disowned by my own family and all, but I can tell Felix and Gemma are tight. They genuinely care for each other. Lucky bastards,” he concludes with a wry smile.
We silently fist-bump one another.
“I hear that. My relationship with my family is still… strained. They didn’t disown me, but they sure as shit aren’t super happy about the life choices I’ve made.
My older sister and I talk some, but I’ve never been super close with my older brother.
Too much of an age gap. We’re also very different individuals and our personalities don’t mesh, so I’ve never had a deep sibling bond with him.
He’s a warrior and all about duty, responsibility, and tradition, like our parents, and my sister is caught up in her own family now.
She’s happy as a clam being a housewife.
I, on the other hand, am the rebellious wild child who dared to defy all of that. ”
“That’s cuz you’re a total badass.” He salutes me. “Mad respect, girl.”
I grin. “Yeah, I’m super fucking awesome. And I do think, deep down, my siblings might be a bit envious of me. I’m sure there were things they might have wanted to do that they abandoned in favor of following societal expectations. Seeing me do what I want must be a bitter pill to swallow.”
“You’re probably right,” Sasha agrees, “but that isn’t your fault.
Even on Earth, I think most people tend to follow the status quo.
It’s safe, familiar, and even comfortable for a lot of folks.
In contrast, those of us who are brave enough to forge our own paths and buck convention are often envied but also loathed.
We’ve done what others didn’t have the courage to do.
” He shrugs. “I’m sure it’s the same among other species in the universe.
It takes a lot of determination and bravery to choose a different path when everyone and everything around you tell you not to. ”
I shake my head wonderingly. “No fucking kidding.”