Chapter 10 #2
“I know. And I’m not suggesting I take you to bed right now,” I said, “but the offer for more is there, whenever you feel ready.”
For the record, I totally would have taken him to bed right then if he’d asked.
Hell, I would have taken him to dinner too, if he’d wanted that.
But he didn’t ask. Instead he stepped back, pulling out of my hold, and said, “It might not be for a while. Not because I don’t want to,” he added quickly, “but my life is kind of a mess right now. Zero offense, but between two jobs and Gracie, I barely have time to sleep, let alone think about having a sex life. And I definitely don’t have my shit together enough to date or anything. ”
“That’s fine. I’m not suggesting that. But like I said, if and when you’re ready to explore, I’ll be right here.”
Wilder bit his bottom lip, ran his uninjured hand through his hair, then exhaled and said, “Yeah.” There was something in his expression I couldn’t quite read, but then he grinned and it was gone. “Okay.”
“Okay,” I repeated. I couldn’t tell if I was relieved or disappointed that he wanted this to be no strings. Like, I was pretty sure I wanted him any way he was willing to offer himself, and I meant everything I’d thought about him needing someone he could trust to guide him though this, just…
Just the better I got to know Wilder, the more I liked him.
“I’m gonna go,” Wilder said. Then he leaned in and kissed me—on the cheek this time—before nodding and saying, “Yeah. I’m definitely not as straight as I thought.”
“What gave it away?” I asked drily.
Wilder laughed, and he was still grinning when he walked out the front door.
I watched him out the kitchen window as he crossed the yard between our houses, and I smiled to myself at the spring in his step.
I’d worried that Wilder kissing me would end up making things awkward, but it looked like it might just work out after all.
Just as long as I remembered there were no strings attached.
The cookout was a lot of fun. I took the poster board over for Gracie as well as the potato salad, and both were a hit.
Danny and Miller were great guys. Cash was quiet but still managed to clearly broadcast his opinions with faint snorts and eye rolls.
Chase was abrasive as shit, but it didn’t take me long to warm to him despite it—he was an asshole but a funny one, and he was incredibly protective not just of Cash but the other guys too.
They could all talk shit about each other, but if you were an outsider who tried it?
Prepare to be eviscerated. It felt a lot like being at home with my brothers and sisters.
And I got to see Wilder in his natural habitat, which turned out to be the back porch by the grill, not nailed to the front one.
He was so good with Gracie, in that casual way that the best parents were—making space for her and including her as naturally as breathing, not like those dads who acted like they expected a gold star and a parade just for showing up.
He didn’t go too far the other way and spoil her either.
She was clearly the center of his world, but that didn’t mean she could get away with murder.
She had a wobble at bedtime, still overtired despite her nap earlier in the day, and Wilder picked her up and took her inside.
I heard him reading a storybook to her when I took a stack of plates into the kitchen.
He was good with her. He was doing it right. I hoped he knew that.
I sat on the porch with a beer and listened to Miller talk about some new restaurant that was open in Hopewell and how they made the best Reuben sandwiches. I didn’t know Hopewell, so I just nodded along like I also had strong opinions about Reuben sandwiches.
“Bobby wants to start selling gourmet sandwiches at the gas station,” Danny said.
“Bobby?” I asked. “Not the guy who owns the Adventurama?”
“Yeah, the mayor. He owns almost everything in Goose Run,” Danny said.
“I told him we don’t have the room for a whole-ass kitchen, but when Bobby gets an idea it’s safer to just stay out of the way and let whatever happens happen.
” He cracked open another beer. “Then he said maybe he could attach a deli to the bakery.”
“Goose Run has a bakery?”
“Nope,” Danny said. “It’s another one of his ideas. Most of them don’t ever come to nothing.”
“And the rest never should,” Chase added with a nod.
Wilder came outside, picking up his half-finished beer and then sitting beside me on the bench that ran along the back wall of the house. We were close enough that his thigh pressed against mine, and I had to force myself not to move even closer.
“Gracie asleep?” Danny asked.
“Yup.” He took a swig of beer. “Took three books to do it.” He grimaced. “She was still asking why we don’t have Disney like at Grandma’s. Like, what am I supposed to say to that? That I don’t even know if we’ll have money for groceries next week?” He snorted and shook his head.
“Get the man another beer,” Chase said.
“I’m not even finished with this one yet,” Wilder complained but took the beer that Cash gave him. “It’ll be fine. If Steve doesn’t have the work, I’ll see if Candii’s got more gigs.”
Miller shot him a wide-eyed look.
“What?”
“Your kid’s kindergarten teacher is right there.”
“Catch up, Miller. He knows I strip,” Wilder said. “Right, Avery?”
“Yup.” I nodded and took a swig of my beer. Then, feeling brave, I grinned and said, “The cowboy outfit is my favorite.”
Everyone hooted with laughter, even Miller.
Then, because Miller still didn’t know the story, Danny told it in exaggerated and mostly incorrect detail while Wilder laughed and shook his head and I blushed a lot.
It was a little embarrassing, but also? It was fine.
I didn’t feel like an outsider. I felt like I was their friend too.
Wow, look at me! I had a house, and a job, and I had work friends and now nonwork friends.
My nonwork friends were also my neighbors, which was kind of a two-for-one deal.
And if one of those neighbor-nonwork friends was also a guy who thought I was pretty and wanted to kiss me, I guessed that meant I was pretty much winning at life.
I grinned around my beer, which was a mistake because some of it went down the wrong way and Wilder had to smack me on the back while I coughed.
But he kept his hand resting against my shoulder blades even after I’d remembered how to breathe again, and the warm weight of his touch almost made choking worth it.
By the time I made my way home an hour later, I had a pleasant buzz going on from the beers I’d drunk. Wilder saw me out, and I could still see him silhouetted against the porch when I reached my front door.
Maybe he was watching to make sure I made it home safely, but I preferred to think it was because he couldn’t stop staring at my ass.
The next couple of weeks flew by, and the best thing about them was that nothing memorable happened at all.
Work was going great, and I was really starting to find my groove with both my own class and the other kids at the school.
I went for drinks again a couple of times with Dana and Alan, but I stuck to beer like I’d promised myself.
Wilder was there one of the nights, but he didn’t give me another lap dance, which left me both relieved and disappointed.
He was back working for his uncle’s roofing company, which meant there were still times he was running late to pick Gracie up, but somehow it wasn’t the big deal I’d thought it was before, although that could have been because now I knew it wasn’t deliberate. It was just life kicking Wilder’s ass.
It was thinking about Wilder that prompted me to walk next door one Saturday morning and knock on his door. There was silence for a moment, and then Wilder answered the door. “Hey,” he said. “Everything okay?”
The fact he assumed I was only there because something was wrong cemented my decision to have the guys over. I obviously needed to up my good neighbor game.
“Everything’s fine,” I said. “I just wondered if you all wanted to come over for a spaghetti dinner tonight.”
Wilder’s face creased into a grin. “Really? Gracie loves spaghetti.”
“Yeah, me too,” I said. “It’s my mom’s go-to recipe when we’re all home, so I thought I could make it and invite you guys over to share.”
“That sounds great,” Wilder said.
“What sounds great?” Chase peered over Wilder’s shoulder. “Hey, Avery.”
“Avery’s making spaghetti for us all tonight,” Wilder said.
“Awesome!” Chase said, and there wasn’t even a trace of sarcasm there. He disappeared, leaving Wilder and me alone.
“So I guess I’ll see you tonight.”
“Looking forward to it,” Wilder said, and his smile became softer.
I spent the afternoon in a frenzy of cooking and cleaning and figuring out if I had enough bowls for seven people and if it mattered that none of them matched, and the whole time a spark of excitement danced in my belly at the thought of spending time with Wilder and getting to talk to him properly, instead of just exchanging ten words outside the classroom.
It was pretty crowded in my dining room by the time we squeezed six adults and Gracie around the table, and Cash ended up taking his bowl of spaghetti and standing in the corner with an arm curled around it protectively, but it felt familiar and comforting.
It gave the same vibes as when my family all got together, with plenty of good-natured teasing over who was going to get the last slice of garlic bread—Cash, obviously.
Dinner was the most fun I’d had in a while.
Wilder sat next to me wearing an easy smile, laughing at Danny’s dumb jokes and teasing Miller over wearing a white T-shirt to a spaghetti dinner, and if I happened to sneak glances at him when he threw his head back and laughed, so what? He was an attractive guy.
Once we’d finished eating, I gathered up the empty plates and carried them to the kitchen. Wilder appeared next to me moments later with his own handful of crockery and stacked them in a neat pile on the counter. “Thanks for dinner,” he said.
“It was no problem.” I tilted my head in the direction of the dining room, where I could hear Danny laughing and Gracie saying something. “I miss family dinners, so I borrowed yours.”
“Yeah, Danny’s basically my brother, and I guess the twins are too now.” His shoulder bumped mine, and he nodded at the sink. “Wash or wipe?”
“What? No, I’ll do them later.”
“Bullshit,” he said and shoved me over with his hip and started filling the sink. “And now you’re stuck drying.” He grinned like he’d done something clever.
A minute later Danny stuck his head through the kitchen door. “Hey, Gracie’s starting to get cranky. You want a hand here, or you want I should take her home and put her to bed?”
“Bed,” Wilder and I said in unison.
“I’m gonna stay and help clean up because someone has to show Avery that we were raised right,” Wilder said.
Danny snorted. “Too late, bro. He’s met us.” He ducked out of the kitchen and we heard him talking softly to Gracie. A moment later she rushed into the room to say goodnight. Then Miller and Chase and Cash came and thanked me for dinner—well, Cash gave me a thumbs-up—before they left.
Then it was just Wilder and me and a sink full of dishes.
I kind of liked it. We didn’t talk much, just washed and wiped in companionable silence, but Wilder’s presence seemed to fill my kitchen, and I was super aware of the fact we were alone.
I wondered if that was deliberate on his part.
Our fingers brushed a couple of times when he handed me the plates, sending sparks up my spine, and I waited—hoped—for him to make some kind of move.
But when the last plate was dried and put away, he didn’t try to kiss me or anything.
He just wiped down the counter, dried his hands, and said, “Thanks again for tonight. It was real nice.”
“Any time,” I said.
And then he sauntered out the door and crossed the yard to his house, leaving me to watch him out of my kitchen window while wondering what it would take for him to kiss me again.