43. Chapter 43
Chapter forty-three
J udas stood outside of Paul’s hospital room for hours. He promised Eliza he would be there and he never regretted a second of his duty to her. When he received a text from her that he was safe to leave and meet at her apartment, he hesitated but only for a moment. He felt the momentary grip of fear that she was only trying to get him to leave so that she could slip into the room unnoticed, but then he realized he trusted her more than she trusted herself.
He knew she would never risk her own life and well-being for the scum that was Paul Arthur. He knew that she might want to kill him and he might even deserve it, but she was too good of a person to carry through with it. The entire charade of guarding the room, to begin with, was only for her peace of mind.
Knocking on Eliza’s door, he planned to tell her just that. He wanted her to know that she was never in danger of her own self. She was strong, courageous, and pure. But when she opened the door, all the words left his mind.
She was completely shattered.
Eliza worked for the last several hours to hold herself together, but with Judas in front of her, she felt the freedom to let it all go and finally fall to pieces. The tears began to pour from her face and she fell willingly into his open arms.
He held her tight against his chest and walked her backward into the apartment. Shutting the door behind them, he ran a gentle hand down her back, soothing her like a child. Her sobs vibrate through him and send splintering cracks through his heart. Kissing her hair, he scooped her into his arms, walked to the couch, and sat with Eliza cradled in his arms.
“Ahava, my Eliza,” he cooed against her hair.
She buried her head in his chest, trying to speak, “He’s a rapist, Judas. Paul… he’s… a… oh, god, Judas…”
Her words sliced through him and he held her closer to him, still rubbing her back to comfort her. Though, at this point, he wasn’t sure comfort was possible.
Leaning away from the sanctuary of his chest, Eliza looks into his eyes, “Judas, my father raped Nevaeh. That’s why Chet did what he did. And I don’t think she’s the first one. It goes all the way back to my mother. She learned what he was and she was leaving. She was leaving and she died. Judas, I…” her voice catches on a sob, “It’s so unfair. And I have stood behind him even though I knew it was wrong. Even before I knew how wrong, I knew it was wrong, but I still stood there making excuses for him. Jesus, it’s all so fucking disgusting. He is a horrible, disgusting man and I helped him get to where he is.”
The rage boiling through his veins made it hard for Judas to stay seated here holding his love. He wanted nothing more than to walk into Paul Arthur’s room and tear him to shreds. Not only did he desecrate the bodies of young girls, but he splintered Eliza’s heart into a million tiny pieces. The look of devastation shining from her deep irises was the only thing holding him in place.
Swallowing back his rage, Judas took her face in his hands, “You did nothing wrong, Ahava. You didn’t know. You couldn’t have known.”
Eliza shook her head in frustration, “No, that’s not good enough.” Anger billowed as she pushed herself away from his embrace to stand, “Men get away with shit like this because people in their lives don’t hold them accountable for the shitty things they do. I hate those people!” Furious tears pour from her eyes, “I was one of those people I hate, Judas. I made excuses and told myself he could be redeemed if I just kept trying. I knew he was a terrible person. I knew!”
Eliza stood before Judas, shaking from her indignation. The sight of her looking so ravaged by heartbreak was almost more than he could take.
“Eliza,” he whispered carefully, “You are not responsible for the sins of your father. As for the work you have done for him, you can’t take it back. All you can do is move forward.”
His words sank into her and her shoulders shook with another round of tears, “I just keep thinking of what he has done to these poor girls. And all the other women he’s lied to to get what he wants. What he has put them through. What he has taken from them and… Judas, it just hurts so much because I can’t take away the hurt he has caused them. I just want,” her voice cracks with emotion, “I just want to make him pay!”
Standing from the sofa, he walked to her as she dissolved into inconsolable cries. Judas wrapped his arms around her, carrying her to her bed. He laid her down before crawling in beside her to hold her while she cried.
***
Judas had no idea how much time had passed, but eventually Eliza’s tears dried and her body was still. Thinking she has fallen asleep, he gently places a kiss on her forehead. To his surprise, he was greeted with a murmur of acknowledgment and then a quick peck on the lips before Eliza sat up, breaking their embrace. She rolled to the edge of the bed and sat with her face in her hands.
“Come back, Ahava,” he pleaded, knowing she needed this intimacy as much as he did.
She shook her head, standing, “No, I can’t.”
He watched as she walked around the room like a woman on a mission. She changed her clothes, ran a brush through her long hair, and swiped beneath her eyes in an attempt to wipe away the streaks of mascara trailing down her face. When she was finished, Eliza turned to face him.
She motioned for him to follow, “Get up, love. I need your help.”
He moved to the edge of the bed to sit, motioning for her to come to him. Eliza obeys and positions herself to stand between his thighs.
Wrapping his arms around her legs, Judas hugs her to him, resting his face against her stomach, “I will help you do anything you need, but you don’t have to do anything at all if you’re not ready.”
Eliza ran her fingers through his long, silky hair, gripped the strands, and pulled his head back to look up at her, “I am ready.”
She had never been more radiant than she was in that moment, of this Judas was absolutely certain. Where just earlier she was wrapped in sadness and regret, now she glowed with resolve and determination.
“Are you sure?” he asked.
Sucking in a sharp breath, she releases it in a long sigh, “Every single person he has victimized deserves tears shed for their pain, but they also deserve vindication. That’s exactly what we’re going to give them. I gave them all the tears I have to give today, now I’m going to take their abuser and I’m going to ruin his life.”
With that, Eliza released his hair and walked from the room.
Judas smiled as he watched her go. Two things were crystal clear in his mind. First, he loved that woman more than he ever thought possible and, second, that was a plan he could absolutely support.