45. Chapter 45
Chapter forty-five
Six Months Later
S ince discovering her mother’s journals, Eliza had started keeping her own.
It all began with pouring over every single word Catherine Arthur had ever written on those pages. Eliza was hungry with a need to know everything. Some of it had been hard to read. Any mention of her father came with the sting of regret and deep hatred. Even the positive things written about him stunk of lies and betrayal. Eliza supposed that was a feeling that would be sticking with her for the rest of her life. At least she hoped it did because the idea of ever forgiving him was absolutely repulsive to her.
The journals weren’t all bad though and there were actually very few mentions of Paul beyond the first year or so of their marriage. After that, it seemed Catherine had begun to get to know herself more intimately and, in turn, given Eliza the same opportunity. She now knew that her mother had loved playing tennis, had hated any kind of social gathering, drank hot tea with cream, and absolutely loathed pickles. Eliza knew that reading Danielle Steele was Catherine’s guilty pleasure and that she dreamed of traveling the world. She loved to cook, but she hated to bake. Her grandmother, Norma, was her hero and Reba Branson was the very best friend she’d ever had in her life.
Most of all, though, she had loved Eliza and being her mother more than anything this world could’ve ever offered. Knowing that filled Eliza with both pride and an aching, relentless sadness. It would ebb and flow through her days but was ever present. Eliza was sure it was just an uncontrollable companion to losing a parent and found ways to coexist with it.
That is where her own journaling had come to be.
Eliza wanted to put her own life down on paper so that maybe someday, someone that loved her as much as she loved her mother could have the same kind of treasure.
She knew at the heart of that plan was another aching heart that would eventually have to live without her. She was in love with and loved by an immortal. Part of that burden is carrying on without the ones you have come to cherish in every season of eternity. When she was eventually gone from this world, she wanted to leave behind a record of their entire life together for him to have always.
Sitting there now, scribbling away on the edge of their bed, she knew that just a few more seconds would tell her if she might be leaving behind another treasure for him to have a little longer than he might have her.
Right on cue, Eliza’s cell phone buzzes to life as her timer expires. Smiling to herself, she closes her eyes as she turns to the nightstand. When she opens her eyes and glances down, she sees the exact answer she was hoping for. Tears lined the rims of her eyes and she scooped the magical little device off the nightstand.
Bounding into their living room, Eliza stared across the space at the only man she could ever love. His head was bowed reverently as he carefully sliced mushrooms to add to the risotto he was preparing for dinner. For a long pause, she just admired him standing there. He was beautiful beyond words. Inside and out. Her heart gave an enthusiastic flutter as she gazed at him. Then another body part gavea flutter too because the things that man could do to her body…
Shaking off the rising hormones, Eliza walked across the space and sat on a bar stool across the counter from him. He looked up at her and smiled.
“My Eliza, are you ready for dinner?”
She smiled back and said nothing. She simply slid a positive pregnancy test across the counter.
He looked at the test and a million thoughts raced through his mind. Joy. Fear. Elation. Anxiety. In the onslaught of questions and emotions, his hand slipped and the knife sliced through his flesh.
He cried out at the pain, “Khara!”
Eliza gasped and came to stand next to him as he ran the bleeding finger under cold water. She’d hoped he’dbe as excited as she was. They’d talked about the possibility of having children someday, but always in the capacity of adoption. Judas wasn’t even sure it was possible for a thousands year old immortal being to have children, but it was in their plan somehow. Now, seeing the blank look on his face and the uncharacteristic slip of his knife, Eliza wasn’t so sure.
As she came to his side and her whole body pressed against him, Judas quickly forgot all his questions. Suddenly, he could think of nothing, not even his bleeding wound, but the fact that her body had a tiny piece of them both growing inside her. He was filled with a warmth he had never experienced before.
Looking down at her worried eyes, Judas placed his not-bleeding hand against her stomach. She flushed at his touch and their eyes met.
“Is there really a baby in there?” he asked.
Eliza nodded.
A jubilant smile overtook his face and he leaned down to place his mouth against hers. Desire and love swirled inside him and the way he wanted her on a normal daily basis exploded into something even more ferocious. He needed to have her right here, right now. He wanted to worship this new body that was creating a new life within it.
Breaking the kiss, Judas reached to shut off the water, sure his cut had healed itself completely by this point. As he moved to touch her, Eliza cried out.
“Judas! You’re still bleeding!” She grabbed paper towels and began to wrap them around his wound, soaking up the blood.
Desire moved to the back of his mind, as Judas turned his main focus to the cut on his hand. She was right. The cut was still wide open and pouring blood. It looked like it might even need stitches. Leaning toward it, Judas stared in awe.
He swallowed hard as he turned to Eliza, “I… I’m not healing.”
Her eyebrows furrowedand concern took over her entire face as a million what ifs passed through her mind, “Judas, I don’t understand.”
He wasn’t sure, but for the briefest of moments, he thought he felt the familiar clasp of a long lost friend’s hand on his shoulder. The phantom touch didn’t answer his questions, but it allowed a glowing feeling of possibility to take root in his mind.
Judas swallowed hard, staring at the beautiful woman before him. The woman he feared losing since the moment he met her. The woman that he wasn’t sure he would be able to live without someday when she was old and gray and too elderly to carry on in life. This woman that he craved growing old with. And, now, this child. This growing life that he would undoubtedly love more than any life he could ever have. This child that he would also outlive.
Judas swallowed back his tears of gratitude, “I think it might be the answer to my prayers.”
Without another word and with his wounded flesh ignored and forgotten, Judas swept Eliza into his arms and placed her on the counter before him. He spent the rest of the evening making her body shake with pleasure until they were both spent.
Until their dinner was burnt embers on the stovetop.
Until the certainty of forever became the possibility of a life well spent.