CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Julian felt refreshed after spending time at the small lake with Kiara, even though it had been raining. After a hectic couple of weeks, the outing had been a welcome slowing down.
When they left the lake, Julian asked Kiara to drop him off at the main house since Elijah would be arriving shortly. Kiara had opted to head back to her house, so Julian stood and watched as she slowly pulled away in the UTV. Once she disappeared from view, he turned and went into the house.
“Good afternoon, Son,” Duncan said as Julian walked into the living room. Also present were Elizabeth, Annie, and Cole.
Julian greeted each of them, then said, “Elijah is arriving in a few minutes.”
“His room is ready,” Elizabeth assured him.
“No room for him to stay at your place?” Annie asked.
Julian hesitated to respond because he didn’t know why he hadn’t taken Kiara up on her offer of the basement space for Elijah. “We don’t really have an actual spare room. Just a pull-out couch in the basement.”
“I guess the girls didn’t figure they’d need to have space for guests when they designed the house.”
“Each suite has two bedrooms,” Julian said, “but I’ve got my second room set up as an office, and Kiara’s extra room is now a nursery.”
They chatted for a bit more before Julian received a text on his phone letting him know Elijah had just passed through the front gate. Julian excused himself and went to the mudroom door to wait for him since that’s where he’d park his car.
It was great to see his friend again, and after he took his stuff up to the room where he’d be staying, they set off for the rec center. Elijah was eager for some physical activity after being in his Jeep for the past three days.
Benji ended up joining them at one point, and when he did, Julian took a seat on one of the benches that lined the wall. The competitiveness of the play amped up considerably with Benji’s arrival, and Julian couldn’t keep pace with it.
They kept playing until it got close to dinner. Julian headed to his house while the other two returned to the main house to shower and change.
It was quiet when Julian let himself into the house. He looked toward the door to Kiara’s suite, but it was closed.
Though he wanted to check on her, he went to his suite instead. She knew what time they needed to be there for dinner, so presumably she’d be ready on time.
In his suite, he changed out of his casual clothes into a pair of black slacks and a long-sleeved dark green button-down. He brushed his hair into its usual style, adding a bit of product to hold it in place.
When he left his suite, Julian saw that Kiara’s door was still closed, and he felt a bit of concern. He walked toward the door, planning to knock on it.
He’d just about reached it when the door swung open. Kiara’s eyes widened when she spotted him.
“Is everything okay?” she asked, her hand still on the doorknob.
“Yep. I was just coming to see if you were ready to go for dinner.”
“I am,” she said with a nod. She stepped through the doorway, then closed the door behind her. “I just forget that everything takes a bit longer these days. Not to mention trying to find something to wear. "
“Well, you look very nice,” he said, taking in the long-sleeved light pink blouse that flowed over a long fitted black skirt. Her hair was loose, with the curls hanging down past her shoulders.
She gazed at him for a moment before she said, “Thank you. You look very handsome as well.”
Julian gave her a quick smile, then gestured toward the garage. “Shall we go?”
Nodding, she fell into step beside him as they walked to the door of the garage.
“Do you want to drive?” he asked as he pressed the button to open the overhead door.
“No, you can have that honor this time.”
Julian walked around the UTV and opened the door for her. Offering her his hand, he helped her up onto her seat, then closed the door.
It was dark out already, but the road was well lit with streetlamps all along the way.
Once November hit, which wasn’t that far away, the estate would be decorated for Christmas.
Elizabeth insisted that their celebration of Thanksgiving wouldn’t be lessened by the presence of some Christmas decorations.
For the first time in over seventeen years, there would be a baby celebrating its first Christmas. His baby. His son. It was crazy to think about.
He wondered if Kiara was going to decorate their house, or if she’d want to hire someone to do it for her like Elizabeth usually did. Given the baby would only be a month or so old, he didn’t know if she’d feel up to doing it on her own.
When they got to the house, they found that the others were there already. Angie greeted Kiara with a hug, then they were all ushered into the dining room.
Julian took his seat beside Kiara and went on to enjoy one of the most relaxing family dinners he’d ever experienced at the estate. It was exactly the opposite of how things had been at the gala.
Later, as he and Kiara prepared to go home, they made arrangements to go to church in Coeur d’Alene the next day. They decided to take two vehicles, with Jude and Angela going in Jude’s truck, while Julian, Elijah, and Kiara would go with their bodyguards in an SUV.
After saying goodnight to everyone, Julian once again drove the UTV back to the house. Kiara let out a sigh as she walked into the kitchen.
“Tired?” Julian asked, becoming more aware of how physically taxing the pregnancy was on Kiara.
“A little.”
“Want a fire?” he offered.
She glanced over at him. “If you want to light one, sure.”
“I’m happy to do that.”
“I’m going to get into something a bit more comfy,” she said as she headed to her room.
Julian decided to also change before starting the fire and quickly went to his room to pull on a pair of pajama pants and a T-shirt.
Kiara still wasn’t out when he went to the fireplace to start the fire, but he’d just gotten it going when she joined him.
She lowered herself slowly onto the same end of the couch she’d taken the last time. As the flames grew, Julian got to his feet and joined her on the couch. He settled in, keeping a comfortable distance between them.
In the past, he’d brought his laptop out to work on while they’d sat together in the living room. Now, he left it in his suite and just enjoyed being in the moment.
The warmth from the fire radiated across the room, casting dancing shadows on the walls. Julian watched the flames for a moment, feeling more at peace than he had in weeks.
"This is nice," he said softly. "I didn't realize how much I needed this quiet time until now."
Kiara nodded, tucking her feet beneath her. "It's good to have you home. I mean—" She glanced away. "Back at the estate."
Julian smiled at her correction. Home. The word resonated in a way he hadn't expected. "It's good to be back. Traveling is part of the job, but it’s wearing on me more than it used to."
"Is that why you seemed so tired when you got back yesterday?" she asked.
"Partly that. Partly the jetlag. Partly that I was just thinking about some things." He leaned back, letting the cushion take his weight. "It's been a crazy few months, you know?"
"I do know," Kiara said, her hand moving to rest on the curve of her belly.
Julian watched the gentle rise and fall of her hand with each breath. Something about the quiet intimacy of the moment, just the two of them bathed in firelight, made him want to be honest in a way he rarely was.
"I've been thinking a lot about becoming a father," he admitted. "About the kind of father I want to be."
Kiara's expression softened. "And what have you decided?"
"That I want to be better than my dad was." The words came out before he could filter them. "Don't get me wrong. Duncan provided everything we could ever need materially, but he wasn't… present, really. At least not until after the kidnapping. Then, he became obsessed with protecting us.”
“That’s kind of understandable, though.”
Julian nodded. “But I want to find a balance so our son doesn’t feel smothered.”
“I’ll help you with that.”
That was actually reassuring to Julian. They came from such different backgrounds that it might have caused problems. But since they both wanted something different from how they’d been raised, he had hopes that they could find some middle ground and figure out what was best for their son.
They talked for about an hour, each sharing things about their childhoods that they’d struggled with, and what they hoped to be able to do differently for their son.
It was enlightening for Julian, and in some ways, distressing as he learned more about the life Kiara had lived on the homestead. What made it even more difficult to hear was coming to understand in more detail what Angela also went through as a result of his actions as a kid.
“I’d better go to bed,” Kiara said after giving a big yawn. “Falling asleep out here isn’t an option since I have to be up for church tomorrow.”
Julian wished their time together didn’t have to end, but he could see she needed to rest.
He got to his feet, then held out his hand to Kiara. “Need a hand?”
“I’d like to say no,” she said as she reached out to take it. “But a lift would be nice.”
As he helped her to her feet, her belly bumped into his hip. He reached down and rested his hand on her stomach. “Hey, little guy, be good and let your mama sleep tonight.”
When he looked up, his gaze met and held Kiara’s. There was a sudden rush of emotions inside him that he didn’t know what to do with. He didn’t even recognize what all of them were.
But there was a longing to be able to go to bed with her. Not for anything more than to just hold her in the darkness and talk. To feel his son move beneath his hand as he listened to Kiara’s breaths deepen as she fell asleep.
Given that he’d never wanted to actually sleep with any of the women he’d been with, it was a new, confusing feeling.