Chapter Eighteen
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Stevie
A fter an exhausting week, between work and the incident with Mark—though Caleb hadn’t disclosed how he’d taken care of the issue and I really wasn’t sure I wanted to know the details—I was actually grateful for the weekend getaway at the Dune Deck Beach Club in the Hamptons that Caleb had planned for Owen’s birthday.
Caleb, Owen, Cara, and I had arrived Friday evening, with Remy and Raven driving separately and meeting us for dinner at a nearby restaurant before we all headed to the club to check in for the weekend. I shared a two-bedroom suite with Cara that had a breathtaking ocean view, while Caleb and Owen stayed in a similar room next to ours.
The exclusivity of the club wasn’t lost on me, and when we arrived that initial imposter syndrome was strong. It was difficult not to be aware of all the luxurious amenities, along with the caliber of upper-class and wealthy members who belonged to the club.
But just like at the gala, the fact that I was with Caleb Kane—a guest that the employees knew by name—there was an automatic acceptance. No one looked at me twice, or in any way that made me feel as though I didn’t belong, which made it much easier to relax and enjoy myself.
Saturday morning we all had breakfast together, then Caleb and Remy took Owen to a nearby family park for a few hours for a round of mini-golf and go-karting, while Raven insisted us girls enjoy a bit of pampering at the spa since my sprained wrist wasn’t conducive to handle those more challenging and fun games. We opted for pedicures, then met up with the boys for a bite to eat once they returned.
After lunch, Raven, Cara, and I took Owen down to the beach while the men went to the lounge to watch a football game. While Cara and Owen kicked around a beach ball on the sand, Raven and I reclined on lounge chairs beneath umbrellas, sipping on fruity drinks that had been delivered to us.
“So, what’s going on with you?” Raven asked, setting her drink on the small table between us. “And don’t tell me you’re fine, because that would be a lie.”
It was the first time we’d been alone together since arriving at the Hamptons, and leave it to my best friend to be blunt. “There’s just a lot that’s happened this past week, as you well know.” I lifted my braced hand to make my point.
She didn’t look convinced. “Did something happen between you and Caleb? The two of you seem…off, and you especially seem quieter than usual and more closed off.”
I glanced out at the ocean and sighed, because I couldn’t deny her claim. At least her impression about my mood lately, because I knew I was the one who’d created that divide between myself and Caleb.
Caleb had been nothing but attentive since our night together after the gala, but not in an overbearing way. I knew he was concerned about my wrist, which was still in a brace, but I realized now that the issue with Mark was resolved, Caleb’s actions toward me were more…subdued. It was as though he’d taken his cues from me, clearly sensing, and respecting, those walls I’d re-erected to keep my emotions safe from potential heartbreak. Like a man who was completely in tune to my needs, he was giving me space, free from pressure or expectations.
It’s what I thought I wanted, that pulling back was necessary…yet I missed our easy flirtations. The way he’d touch me just because he could. How he’d looked at me as if I was the only woman who mattered to him. I still saw glimpses of those things, but it was clear that Caleb was letting me figure things out, without making me feel smothered, which was one of the things I loved about him.
Yes, I loved him, and it made me wonder, despite my misgivings about fitting into his world, if losing Caleb and that deep, undeniable connection between us was worth it. Was I letting my pride and insecurities get in the way of what could be the greatest love of my life? But then again, I really had no idea where I stood with Caleb, and what would happen once the custody case was over.
“Hey, are you still with me?” Raven snapped her fingers in front of me.
I blinked, realizing that I’d zoned out and she was still waiting for an answer. “Sorry,” I said, shaking my head.
“Yeah, not sure where you disappeared to, but welcome back,” she joked.
I exhaled a deep breath before speaking and giving Raven the truth. “You asked if something happened between Caleb and I, and honestly, the issue is me,” I admitted.
“You?” Her brows rose. “How so?”
“After my run-in with Alyssa at the gala, I can’t deny she planted doubts and insecurities about not being the kind of woman who blended into Caleb’s world, because of how I grew up, and feeling like an outsider looking in.” I stared at my newly painted pink toenails for a few beats, before shifting my gaze back to Raven’s. “I mean, those doubts were always there, but I’d be lying if I said she didn’t amplify them.”
Raven tipped her head. “And what kind of woman are you referring to, who would be a better match for Caleb?”
I shrugged. “Someone sophisticated and worldly, who knows all the etiquette and formalities of being with an obscenely wealthy man like Caleb.”
Raven rolled her eyes, that sarcasm transferring to her voice when she said, “Yeah, because Caleb marrying someone from his social circle worked out really well the first time.”
“You know what I mean,” I said, shifting restlessly on the lounge chair.
“Let me tell you what I do know,” Raven said, her expression completely serious. “As you’re already aware, I’ve lived two separate lives, one with money, and one without, so I know what it’s like to have those insecurities. I was adopted into the Kane family, but I was never embraced by a mother who should have loved me regardless of who I am. I was raised with all the luxuries money could buy, but was never accepted in the way I craved but rather made to feel like I was a burden, not to mention responsible for Lance’s behavior when he assaulted me the first time, when I was a teenager.”
I held back a reaction because I knew the story and understood it was a sensitive one for Raven.
“What I do know,” she went on, “and learned from Cassandra and Lance, is that money and wealth doesn’t give you integrity. It doesn’t give you morals or decency. You could be dirt poor or filthy rich, but if you don’t have those core values, then what kind of person are you? You’re someone like Cassandra, or Alyssa, who is self-centered and a bitch who has to put others down to feel better about themselves.”
Raven’s gaze suddenly softened as she continued. “Then you have men like Caleb, and Remy, who are honorable, ethical, and dependable. Men who don’t judge a person for things that are out of their control, like my past with Lance, and yours with your father. They don’t give a shit about those things when it comes to the women they care about.”
I swallowed hard, Raven’s words resonating deep inside of me.
“There are always going to be insecure women like Alyssa who will try to bring other women down,” she went on. “All that should matter to you is what Caleb thinks, and I already know by the way he looks at you and treats you, he’s crazy about you. Now, it’s up to you to believe that you’re enough for him just as you are, that you deserve a man who makes you happy, no matter his social standing, without any doubts or insecurities getting in the way of your happiness.”
My heart pounded in my chest as I realized that was exactly what I was doing. Allowing my feelings of inadequacy to keep me from taking that final leap of faith with Caleb. To trust that a man like him, who’d already proven himself in so many ways, would love me just as I was.
Even though I had no alone time with Caleb, Raven’s advice stayed with me for the rest of the afternoon and evening, and through to the next morning when everyone met down in the restaurant for brunch to celebrate Owen’s seventh birthday. As our small group was led to a more private area of the dining room, Caleb smiled at me and placed a hand low on my back as we walked in that direction—not because it was expected, but because I knew it was something that was just instinctual for him, and because he wanted to touch me, to let me know he cared despite the fact that I’d pulled back due to my insecurities and fears.
Feeling as though I’d made some kind of mental and emotional breakthrough after my conversation with Raven the previous day, I was anxious to talk to Caleb, to tell him that I didn’t want us to be over after the custody case. Here in the Hamptons, with Owen and family around, it wasn’t the place to have that discussion, but I was prepared to fight for all the things Caleb had silently offered me—protection, a safe space, and the kind of emotional security I’d never had before. He’d given me all those things, and so much more, and I’d be a fool to let my pride get in the way of something so special and rare. And I needed to tell him that I wanted us, that I wanted him , and everything that came with being a part of his life.
He glanced at me as we sat next to each other, and I smiled at him—not the kind of obligatory smile I’d been resorting to all week because of those walls I’d erected, but a real and intimate one that softened my features and hopefully conveyed my willingness to let him in.
He tipped his head, as if sensing the change in me. “I take it you slept well last night?” he asked as everyone else settled into their seats, with Owen sitting beside me at the end of the table.
“I would have slept better in your bed, with you,” I teased in a whisper, giving him enough to realize that I was also completely serious.
His gaze searched mine, and I saw the hopeful look in his eyes as he reached down and took my good hand, weaving our fingers intimately together. The gesture conveyed affection and tenderness, comfort and reassurance, and I opened myself to all those things with him.
“You and I need to talk,” he said.
We hadn’t really “talked” much over the past week because I hadn’t allowed it, but he obviously saw an opening he didn’t want to let slip though his fingers. Usually we need to talk came with an adverse implication, but I had a feeling that Caleb and I were finally, hopefully, on the same page.
“Yes, we do,” I agreed.
For the next hour, it was all about celebrating Owen’s birthday. The adults ordered brunch entrees, and pancakes for Owen, followed by a chocolate cake with candles. The presents everyone had brought for the occasion were unwrapped, revealing Lego sets, superhero figurines, Minecraft gear, and a Nerf gun from his uncle Remy.
“They’re right over there,” a familiar female voice said in a loud, demanding tone, interrupting our festivities. “I can see them in that room and I want to wish my son a happy birthday.”
My stomach pitched, already knowing who it was before we all glanced in Alyssa’s direction, watching her approach—a bit unsteadily—with a hostess trying to dissuade her. The same man I’d seen at the gala with her trailed a few feet behind, clearly looking uncomfortable with the scene she was making.
“I’m very sorry, Mr. Kane,” the hostess said as they reached us. “I’ll go get the manager.”
“It’s fine ,” Alyssa insisted irritably, shooing away the young girl with her hand. Then she dropped her purse on the end of the table and held her arms out toward Owen. “Come here and give your mother a hug.”
Owen shook his head and shrank away from Alyssa and toward me, pressing against me, like he’d seen this side of his mother before and it scared him. I wrapped an arm protectively around him, refusing to let Alyssa near him, and the look she gave me was pure disdain.
Caleb abruptly stood up to diffuse the situation, and even across the table Remy was tense as he watched the scene unfold. The only man who didn’t seem poised and ready to interfere was her date. Instead, he stood off to the side, looking embarrassed. Clearly, he didn’t have the backbone to deal with Alyssa’s bullshit, which was why she was probably with a man like him.
“You need to leave, Alyssa,” Caleb said, more calmly than I knew he felt, because he was trying to keep things civil in front of his son.
Cara, as if sensing things were about to escalate, jumped up from her seat and came around to Owen, gently taking his hand. “Hey, Owey, let’s take your Nerf gun and go play with it on the beach.”
“Okay,” he said quietly.
I released him, and he slid off his seat and went with Cara, giving his mother a wide berth as the two of them left the restaurant, and I could understand why. Alyssa’s face was flushed, her pupils little pinpoints, and she overall seemed agitated and unstable.
“Are you serious?” She whirled on Caleb furiously. “I can’t even wish my son a happy birthday?”
Caleb came around to the front of the table. “You weren’t invited, and this is my weekend with Owen.”
Again, calm and controlled, but I could see the rigid set of his body.
Alyssa rolled her eyes insolently. “In case you’ve forgotten, I’m still a member at this club, too, so I’m welcome here whenever I want.” Her gaze slid past Caleb, to me, a sneer on her lips. “And, really, I belong here more than she does. All this tramp is doing is taking advantage of what your money can buy her. But like I already told her, money can’t change where you come from—”
“That’s enough,” Caleb snapped, and grabbed her arm. While she sputtered protests, he led her through the dining room and out a set of glass doors that led to the patio outside.
The guests in the dining room watched the scene, and the man she’d brought with her grimaced, shifting awkwardly on his feet, but he didn’t go to Alyssa’s rescue as she yelled at Caleb, which we could all see happening through the glass doors.
“I’m so sorry,” the guy finally spoke, his meek demeanor shocking me. “Alyssa was adamant that she’d been invited for brunch for her son’s birthday, but clearly, that’s not the case, and I apologize.”
Raven’s lips pursed. “She didn’t tell you that Caleb was going to be here?”
He shook his head. “No, just that we were invited for brunch.”
“Yeah, well, you might want to go and see if you can calm her down,” Remy suggested.
The man frowned as he glanced back at Caleb and Alyssa, and now what looked to be the manager of the club, trying to talk to a hysterical Alyssa. Very reluctantly, he headed in their direction.
As soon as he was gone, Remy grabbed Alyssa’s purse, set it on his lap, and started rummaging through the contents.
“What are you doing?” Raven asked, looking and sounding a little shocked at her husband’s behavior.
“This,” he said, and pulled out a sealed baggie that was filled with prescription bottles and other smaller baggies with various colored pills. “Trying to find the proof that Caleb needs to show that Alyssa is abusing drugs again.” He smiled grimly at his wife. “I’m a private investigator and sometimes I have to be a little creative to get the results I need.”
Raven and I both gaped at the vast amount of drugs Alyssa had on her.
“Oh, shit,” Raven said, echoing my own thoughts.
“Yeah, you could say that.” Remy swiped open his cellphone and started taking pictures of everything, including the names and prescriptions on the bottles. “Jesus,” he muttered to himself. “There’s oxy, Xanax, tramadol…all prescribed by different doctors. And who the hell knows what’s in the smaller, unmarked bags or where she got the pills from.”
He finished collecting the evidence, then shoved the large plastic bag back into her oversized designer purse. He set her bag on the table just as our server came by our table.
The young girl grimaced in apology. “I’m so sorry about the disturbance. “I’m just grabbing her purse since our manager is escorting her off the premises.”
We all watched through the windows as the server gave Alyssa her bag, while the manager of the club tried to reason with Alyssa, who was livid and still yelling. Surprisingly, it was the guy she’d arrived with who calmed her down with something he said to her, and they finally left.
Caleb came back inside, his expression grim, and I knew it was about to get much worse for him when he learned what Remy had discovered.