Chapter 4 #2
With an exhausted sigh, I rolled my head back.
I knew it was risky to close my eyes, but I couldn’t keep them open any longer.
If I could just have a five-minute catnap, I’d wake up ready to finish my shift.
I’d sleep well tonight. I just had to get through a couple more hours.
I didn’t go in until the lunch shift at Stone and Vine tomorrow, so I could sleep late in the morning too.
I let my head rest against the sofa, and the first picture that formed was Travis leaning over me. In my fantasy, instead of leaving, he kissed me—a kiss that felt like a promise of what could happen once the bar was closed and it was just the two of us.
I wasn’t dumb enough to fool around with my boss, but there was no harm in imagining it.
Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.
My five-minute catnap had turned into an actual nap, and now I was late getting back from lunch.
I scrambled off the couch and tore open the doors, trying to get back on shift as quickly as possible.
A quick glance at the clock told me I’d been out for close to an hour, which meant I’d taken a double lunch. Dammit.
I tore out of the back hallway into the front of the bar, grabbing an apron on my way so I could get behind the counter.
Things seemed to be winding down. There were still plenty of tables, but instead of the loud, raucous laughter that usually filled the place at night, it was quieter.
People sat relaxing, nursing their beers.
Occasionally, someone got up to change the music on the jukebox, but for the most part, folks stayed put.
Even the pool table in the back was quiet.
At the far end of the bar, Travis was talking to a couple of guys.
From behind, they looked a little familiar, but I couldn’t place them.
Maybe regulars I’d seen before. Travis glanced up and spotted me, and his face broke into an immediate grin.
If he realized how late I was, he probably wouldn’t have been smiling like that.
“Here’s the hero for tonight, gentlemen. I don’t think we would’ve had a single drop of food—actually, I know we wouldn’t have—if it hadn’t been for Casey saving the day.”
I blushed at Travis’s words but appreciated them anyway.
“Now you’re just being ridiculous. All I did was make some poutine.”
“I don’t understand why you keep discounting the poutine. It’s the best thing that ever came out of Canada after hockey.”
“I love poutine!” came an excited voice from the far end of the group.
That explained why some of them seemed familiar. I’d recognize that voice anywhere.
“Rory, what are you doing here?” I asked with a quick grin for him.
“We were over at my parents’ for dinner, and on the way home, we decided to stop in.” A look of concern crossed Rory’s face, and he added, “Are you not at Stone and Vine anymore? Because you’re my favorite.”
“No, I’m still there. I just picked up a couple of shifts here for the holidays.”
“Daddy, Casey helped us figure out how to set up the party for the littles. Wasn’t that nice of him?”
Moments like this always twisted something in me, that old uncertainty about where I fit or if I fit anywhere at all.
“Papa, do you think Casey could come to the party at Wilde Dandies?” Jakob spoke up the second time. If there were two people who were sunshine personified, it was Rory and Jakob. They were constantly doing happy dances. Jakob’s were a little more extravagant, but Rory’s weren’t far behind.
I wasn’t sure how many punny T-shirts Rory had in his closet, but it had to be in the hundreds. I’d never seen him wear the same one twice. Tonight, it was a turkey in a baby bonnet swimming in a vat of gravy, with the words Gravy Baby underneath. It was pretty damn cute.
“Love, it was nice of Casey to help you, but he wouldn’t have a good time at the party. He’s not a little.” The man who answered Jakob cuddled him close.
I knew he hadn’t meant it the way it sounded—that I couldn’t possibly be a little—but the dismissal still stung.
That was usually what happened when I attended other events.
Everyone thought I was a Daddy, I was just killing time, or worst of all, that I was there to bother littles or something equally rude.
Whatever vibe I was giving was the absolute wrong one.
Hearing it aloud made the insecurity flare even though I tried to shrug it off like it didn’t matter.
I hadn’t figured out what it was about me that screamed not a little, especially since I’d been to events where guys bigger than me fit right in.
But I hadn’t found anyone who saw me that way.
And with Jakob’s Papa reminding me I wouldn’t fit in, it made me question my plan to take the night off for the party.
“Papa, the party’s for anyone who wants to have a nice time. The flyer doesn’t say you have to be a little. The flyer says you have to be nice to littles,” Jakob argued, indignant on my behalf. It was cute. He reminded me of a kitten, puffed up like an angry ball of fluff.
Rory joined in next. “Daddy, you better not be getting any ideas either.”
“I didn’t say anything,” the dark-haired man who snuggled Rory said with a grin. “I value my happy home. If you think Casey would enjoy the party, then he should come.”
“I wasn’t saying you can’t come,” Jakob’s Daddy added with a helpless shake of his head. “I just didn’t want you to feel out of place. You should come if you want to though.” Jakob glanced over at him, and his expression softened a little.
“Do you wanna come?” Jakob asked me.
“Guys, I don’t know. I’ve got plans for that night, so I don’t know if I’ll be able to go.” The whole exchange had me feeling some kind of way about it.
“I hope you’ll think really hard. Like super-duper hard. Like the hardest you’ve ever thought in your entire life,” Rory said. He sounded so serious that all I could do was duck my head and get back to work, clearing empty glasses from the bar.
Having this many thoughts within two minutes of waking up was too much for my brain to process.
I didn’t need to make a decision tonight about the party, but now I had serious doubts.
Maybe Jakob’s Papa saw something in me that said I was fooling myself into thinking I was a little, and I needed to accept that.
“You ready to get out of here?” Travis asked just as I was wiping the last table down and tossing the rag in the dirty hamper.
Being around him at the end of a shift always made the whole world feel softer in ways I didn’t trust yet.
“You know, it’s really not necessary to give me a ride home. I can walk or call an Uber or something,” I said.
I turned around quickly so he wouldn’t see me yawn, but my point still stood. He didn’t need to waste his time giving me a ride. I was perfectly capable of finding my own way home.
“This was already settled. I’m gonna give you a ride home. If you don’t want to go home and you want me to drop you somewhere else, I’ll drop you there. But you are not walking at night on the holiday.”
“By this point, everyone’s in a turkey coma. Nobody’s out on the road.”
“So you should worry about the people who aren’t in a turkey coma. What are they doing out? Driving like maniacs, that’s what.” Travis was being ridiculous, but the stubborn set of his jaw told me to give up trying to get him out of work.
I was going home in his car.
“If you’re sure—”
“I’m sure, but go on.”
“As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted,” I said with a raised brow, “I appreciate you doing that. My car should be fixed soon. Hopefully, you won’t have to go out of your way again.”
“Whoa, no. It’s not out of my way, so just stop. In fact, I’m going to make it a rule here at work that you don’t get to say I’m going out of my way for anything.”
What had been a stubborn set of his jaw was now mutinous.
There was no point in telling him how silly a rule that was, so I didn’t bother.
It was obvious he didn’t care about my thoughts on the matter.
Travis waited for me at the bar while I finished my last wipe-down.
An apology threatened to spill from my lips for making him wait, but I swallowed it back. I knew it wouldn’t be well-received.
“Come on, go grab your jacket. You’ve cleaned enough. Anything else can wait until tomorrow.”
The finality in Travis’s voice chubbed my cock again.
This inconvenient boner I got every time he got stern with me needed to resolve itself because I couldn’t go through my entire evening trying to shield myself from anyone noticing.
Luckily for me, reciting what I could remember of the periodic table from high school chemistry managed to get my body under control before I returned to the main area of the bar with my jacket.
Travis once again ushered me through the door with his hand on my back.
I was starting to get more accustomed to the weight and warmth of it.
That alone was probably a bad idea, but I wasn’t ready to stop.
There was something incredibly settling about it, and I didn’t want to risk losing it by mentioning it. My lips were sealed on that front.
Once we got to the car, Travis opened my door.
It was entirely unnecessary, but I liked it.
A lot. Maybe too much. Before he shut the door, he reached inside like he was going to pull my seatbelt before he beat a hasty retreat and slammed the door.
Naturally, my thoughts went immediately to what I had inadvertently fucked up.
When he eased into the driver’s seat of his surprisingly practical SUV, whatever trace of annoyance had caused the slammed door seemed to have evaporated.
No one had opened a door for me in years, and the simple gesture mattered more than it should have.
“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to close it so hard.”
“No worries,” I offered hesitantly.