Chapter 17
Silvie
“I can take the couch,” I say, heat flooding my cheeks. I feel like a jerk stealing his bed from him. “It’s fine, Cal.”
He grunts and shakes his head. “No. Get your rest. I’ll be fine.”
Everything about him is attractive—his smile, his body, his smell—but it’s his heart that’s the most handsome part about him. I feel cherished and taken care of in his presence. Before I can stop myself, I stand on my toes and kiss him. Again.
This time, it’s more familiar. I drag my nails through the hair at his nape, loving how he shivers at my touch. Our kiss goes from sweet to not-so-sweet in three seconds’ flat. But, before he can scoop me up and take me to bed, he pulls away, slightly shaking his head.
“Sleep,” he murmurs, leaning his forehead against mine. “If you don’t, I’m going to do something we’ll both regret.”
I highly doubt that.
His rejection stings, but I respect his boundaries.
“Goodnight, hot fiancé.”
“Night, future wifey.”
I wake up before my alarm, the memories of last night clinging to me like a second skin.
I ached to have him join me in the bed, but this morning, I’m sort of glad he didn’t.
This whole fake wedding thing is confusing.
It’s easy to get swept up in the lie of it.
If I’m not careful, I’ll fall for the man which will hurt way worse than the betrayal of what Tyler did to me.
Losing Cal feels catastrophic.
And I don’t like feeling so vulnerable.
The waves crashing out the window and the early morning ocean breeze brush across my skin.
For a moment, I just lie here, staring at the ceiling fan as it turns slowly and lazily above me.
The air is cool, drifting in through the window, the beachy scent making me feel at home.
And it dawns on me, aside from the oddness of the situation I’m in with Cal, I feel at peace.
He’s safe.
Steady.
And I’m grateful that it’s him on this marriage journey with me because I can actually trust him.
Today’s my wedding day. My second wedding day. A shiver of anticipation ripples through me, but there’s no panic and nausea. No urge to run off to a desert or swamp to hide. Just a quiet peace.
Huh. Strange. I thought maybe all wedding days felt like the previous one. Today feels pretty great.
It’s a fake wedding, and that could be why. But I don’t think that’s it. I feel like anything with Cal feels peaceful. I’ve never felt chaos with him. He isn’t Tyler, and he never will be.
I sit up and swing my feet to the floor. The wood is cool under my feet. Somewhere down the hall, I feel his presence. Cal. He took the couch and refused to let me take it, even though it made sense that I sleep there. I’m smaller.
I open the door and see Cal moving around shirtless, in shorts, and his feet bare.
He has a mug and presses it to his lips as he leans against the counter.
His large frame is comical in such a small space.
His tattoos span over his chest and arms, something I’ve traced in my head several times.
My fingers twitch at the thought of actually touching them.
“Good morning,” I murmur, feeling slightly shy in his half-naked presence.
He watches me walk toward him, a smile on his handsome face, as if he’s been waiting for me. “You sleep okay?”
“Yeah,” I say. “You?”
He shrugs. “Enough. I’ve been up since four.”
“I feel bad taking your bed,” I admit. “I’m taking the couch tonight. I insist.”
He slides a mug across the counter toward me. Coffee and cream. Exactly how I like it. I reach for it and wrap my hands around it, letting the warmth sink in. I inhale its aroma and sigh. “Thank you.”
“No way you’re taking the couch, Silvie.”
I pin him with a narrowed stare. “We’ll see, hot fiancé.”
Heated tension crackles between us. Every day, it multiplies. Like he’s gravity, I feel myself being pulled into his orbit.
“So, today we’re graduating to hot husband?” He playfully rolls his eyes.
“That’s the plan. Are you still on board?” I ask, nervous that he might be having second thoughts.
Yesterday, after our first kiss, we picked up our marriage license. We were able to waive the out-of-state three-day waiting period thanks to Wilby’s maneuvering. I still have no idea how he managed that, but he made it happen.
“Oh, I’m on board. Just making sure you’re not going to be a runaway bride again,” Cal teases.
Even though he’s joking, I sense a thread of unease in his words. Cal’s the kind of guy women run to, not away from. He’s magnetic and incredibly good looking. And soon, he’ll be mine.
Fake mine, but still mine.
“No, not this time,” I assure him. “Thanks again for doing this.” My eyes wander up his arms, and I mentally trace the muscles he has on top of muscles. A chiseled body from a life of working and surfing. Not one that sees the gym, but one that lives an active life.
“Come here,” he says as he sets his mug down and pulls me to his side. He presses his head into my head. He’s warm, steady, and solid. I sigh and lean into him, breathing him in.
Our second kiss was even better than the first. How will the third, fourth, and fifth one feel?
“Are you nervous?” I ask.
He chuckles. “No. Are you?”
I shrug. “Not really.”
He holds me there in his kitchen, and somehow, being in his arms gives me peace, comfort, and a feeling I haven’t had with anyone... ever.
A knock on the door breaks us apart, and he goes over and opens it. Birdie says, “Yoohoo, good morning, love birds.”
She’s a mess but I’m glad to see her.
“Good morning,” I say as I give her a hug, ignoring the love birds comment.
“Big day,” she says, not dramatic, not teasing. Just factual.
I nod. “Yeah, I’m glad you’re here for this one.”
She studies my face, her eyes softening. “How do you feel, sugar?”
I consider her question honestly. Before, I would offer the typical answer, “I’m fine.
” That was my answer to everything because I felt like I couldn’t be anything other than fine.
But being here in Coconut Beach with people who don’t have an agenda for me, I can be real.
I can be me. And right now, I feel good.
“Calm,” I say, surprised that it’s true. “Strangely, calm.”
Cal winks at me and warmth pools in my gut.
Birdie’s smile deepens. “That’s usually when you know you’re doing the right thing.”
Before I can ask where he is, Wilby shows up, carrying two garment bags. He’s already dressed and put together, as if this is another morning for him. Wilby loves events and getting dressed up. He lives for weddings and planning events.
“Good morning. I brought the dress and suit,” he says as he holds them up proudly. “They made it in the nick of time.”
“I haven’t even seen the dress yet,” I muse. “But I know which one you picked.”
“Optics are everything, Silverlyn. We need the photos to be perfect. We have to sell this as a real wedding,” he says as he lays it over the couch.
The calmness falters as I mentally prepare myself for the realness of what’s coming.
“You still good?” he asks Cal.
Cal nods. “Yes.”
I long for that hug Cal and I were having when we were interrupted. I wish I could go back into his arms and just stay there right now. There’s something grounding and relaxing about Cal.
Wilby heads over to the coffee pot and pours himself a cup. “I need this. Also, your dinosaur chased me over here. What is wrong with that thing?”
I frown. “Iggy?”
“Yeah, the monster that lives in the bushes in front of Birdie’s. That’s the one.” He shudders. “Unless it has a whole monster family I don’t know about.”
“I don’t think Iggy likes men,” I muse.
He lifts an eyebrow. “He’s a very rude iguana. Sexist.”
“He’s just misunderstood,” I say. “You just need to bring him a treat or something.”
“You have truly lost your mind,” Wilby says. “I’m not bringing him a treat.”
I shrug. “I’m just saying. That’s the way to your heart. Maybe it’s the way to his, too.”
Birdie laughs and goes back to fussing with the little bouquet she brought me. It’s beautiful with purple flowers and white daisies.
Wilby sips his coffee and glances to where Cal has gone back to his room to get ready. Then he says, “Girl.”
I brace instinctively. “Yes?”
“Your husband is the only family member you get to choose.”
The words hit harder than I expected. They drop straight into my chest and sit there, heavy and undeniable.
Wilby continues, still casual, still scrolling his phone like he didn’t just crack something open inside me. “This time, you’re not picking a loser.”
I huff out a breath. “Pretend husband. And yes, Cal is great for doing this.”
Cal is so far from a loser, it’s not funny. He’s amazing. Funny, kind, strong, protective, and so freaking hot. I could go on and on, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
Wilby looks up again, eyes sharp now. “We’ll see about the pretend part.”
There’s a smirk on his face that says he knows exactly what he’s doing. I open my mouth to argue, then close it. Because part of me doesn’t want to.
“I’m still your boss, you know.”
He scoffs. “We know who gets the work done. And you know I’m still your bestie.”
I grin. I finish my coffee and set my cup in the sink. “All right, let’s get ready.”
I glance at Birdie, and she meets my eyes and smiles. I’m so glad she’s here. It feels right to be here with her. I think about what Wilby said.
The only family member you get to choose is your husband.
But I am lucky that I’ve gotten to choose Birdie and Wilby.
Really lucky. I wish my dad were here. I wish I could tell him about the marriage, but, I can’t.
I don’t know where he stands on everything, and I have to focus on the company.
This is for work. And also, if Dad were involved, he’d have my mother and Belladonna pulled in too, and I don’t want either of them anywhere near Coconut Beach.
This feels like a safe space for me, and they don’t belong.