Chapter 22
chapter twenty-two
Mia
The sound of birds singing outside the window wakes me up, and my eyes fly open with a smile on my face. My body feels warm and satiated, and I roll over to look at Luke and whisper good morning to him. I frown slightly when I see his side of the bed is empty, and I wonder if he’s in the bathroom.
I lie on my back and just stare at the ceiling, smiling.
We finally slept together, and it was amazing.
He was the best lover I ever could have hoped for, and it felt special.
The way he looked at me felt special. The way he made me feel felt special, and I was going to tell him that.
I was going to tell him that it was the best thing that had ever happened to me and that, as upset as I had been at receiving Rex’s invitation, I was glad that I had.
I was glad that he’d written that horrible note because if he hadn’t, then this wouldn’t have happened between Luke and me, and what had happened was special.
I could feel it in my bones. I could see it in his eyes that he felt the same way.
“Are you coming, Luke?” I say, laughing. “Did you drown in there or something?”
I wait for him to respond, but I realize the room is silent—almost deathly silent. I frown slightly as I roll out of bed. I grab the sheet and huddle toward the bathroom. The door’s wide open. There’s no one in there.
Luke’s not in there.
For a moment, I think maybe he’s gone to get me breakfast, but then I spy the note card on the table with my name on it. I grab it and pick it up, frowning.
Hey, Mia. Don’t wait for me for breakfast. Had to do some work, but I’ll see you later.
“What the fuck?” I throw the note card down on the table and go and sit on the edge of the bed.
I’m emotional, and I’m upset, and I feel like I want to cry.
This is not how you want to spend the moment after first sleeping with your best friend. I expected him to hold me, to cuddle me, to possibly make love to me again in the morning, tell me he couldn’t wait for me to wake up—but he already went to work.
I hate the feeling of abandonment that I feel, but I have to be honest with myself.
I’m disappointed. He still chose work first after I gave myself to him.
I thought I’d been clear that I wanted to be his number one, that I wanted him to choose me, and he still didn’t. Hadn’t. Was it too much to ask?
Now I’m confused. Was any of it real? Was it just physical? Was it really just sex?
He’d been upset. He’d been messing with me. We’d argued. Maybe this was his way of trying to make up for the failed lap dance the other night.
I touch my skin softly and think about the way he loved me, the way he felt when he climaxed inside of me, and I shiver because I’ve never felt a connection like that before in my life.
I grab my phone and call Juniper because I don’t know what to do. I want to cry so badly, but I can’t. I need to be strong. I want to be strong.
“Hey, girl, you on your way to work?” She sounds chirpy, and I’m glad because I need someone happy. I need someone positive.
“Juni,” I say, my voice cracking.
“What’s wrong, Mia?”
“We slept together. We slept together, and it was amazing, but I woke up, and he wasn’t here in the bed, and I don’t want to say I feel used because I don’t feel used, but I just don’t feel loved and special, and I don’t know what to do. What does this mean?”
“Okay, Mia. Deep breaths.”
“I’m trying. I’m really trying.”
“Did you enjoy it, first and foremost?”
“It was magical, Juniper. It was, like, the best sex of my life—and not just because he’s got a really nice body and a really nice cock, and he knows exactly what he’s doing, but it just felt like my body had been made for him.
He fit in all the right spaces, and every single touch did something to my erogenous zones.
” I sigh. “Let’s just say, it was great, but maybe it wasn’t great for him.
Maybe he has sex like this with everyone. ”
“Mia, focus. Calm down.”
“I know, I’m going crazy.”
“It’s okay. Have you spoken to him?”
“He went to fucking work, Juniper. He got up while I was still sleeping and he left, and he left me a stupid fucking note card. What are we, roommates or something? Who does that?”
“Oh shit. I’m sorry, Mia, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that he didn’t also enjoy it. It just means maybe he had to work.”
“We had sex for the first time in our friendship. We’re best friends.
We literally are in a fake relationship, and we had sex.
We had sex, Juniper. You more than anyone know how much something like that means to me.
I don’t just sleep around, and he knows that.
He knows that it had to have meant something to me, and he couldn’t even be here in the hotel when I woke up. ”
“I hate to say this, Mia, but he’s a guy, and sometimes, guys don’t really think things through. I bet you were sleeping, and he was like, Ah, she’s sleeping. I need to do some work. I’ll speak to her later.”
I take a couple of deep breaths. “I know you’re right, but it still really stings. He knows me better than that.”
“I know, girl. I know. You want me to close up the store and come over, or—”
“No, it’s okay. Thanks though for offering.
I think I’m going to go shower, and I’m going to cry.
Then I’m going to order myself room service, and I’m just going to move on with my life.
You know what? Lots of people have sex with their best friends.
Lots of people have one-night stands. I will be one of those people, and I’ll just forget it.
It will mean nothing. I’m not even going to bring it up to him, and I hope he doesn’t bring it up to me. ”
I pause as I hear the door opening.
“Oh shit, he’s back. I’ll speak to you later.”
Juniper says goodbye before I hang up. I look over as he walks in. He has a bouquet of flowers in his hand; pink, yellow, and orange petals greet me.
“Morning, sunshine,” he says, heading toward me.
His eyes narrow as he stares at my face.
“Why do you look so forlorn? What’s going on?
Wait, you’re not upset, are you?” He bites down on his lower lip and looks guilty.
“Please tell me I didn’t take advantage of you in your emotional state or anything like that. I would absolutely—”
“You didn’t take advantage of me, Luke. Obviously, I wanted it. We both wanted it, and it was hot.”
“So, you enjoyed yourself, huh? By the way,” he says, “I know we technically should have had this conversation before I came inside of you, but—”
“I’m on the pill, Luke.” I just shake my head. “But, yeah, that is a conversation we likely should have had before you decided to orgasm inside of me. I can’t believe I just said that. You orgasmed inside of me.”
“My sperm filled you up?”
“Luke?” I say, hitting him on the shoulder.
“What?” He starts laughing. It’s true.”
“Yeah, but that sounds so—”
“So, what?” His eyes light up as he takes a seat next to me. “It sounds so sexy. It sounds like you want me to do it again right now.”
“Luke, I’m mad at you.”
“Why?”
He looks genuinely confused, and I just shake my head.
“Because you went to work this morning. You didn’t wait for me to wake up, and I just feel you should have known that I would want to wake up with you in bed.
We’d just had sex for the first time, and that’s an enormous deal.
It would be a big deal for any two people, let alone two people who were as close as us. ”
He sits there, not saying anything. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Mia. Did you not see my note? I left you a note on the table.”
“Yeah, you left me a note on the table. That’s so cold. That’s what one-night stands do. That’s what men whose names you don’t even know do after they sleep with you—not someone that should care about you and want to make sure you feel okay after you had sex with them.”
His jaw drops. “I fucked up again, huh?” He lets out a deep sigh, and I watch as he runs his fingers through his hair.
“I literally had to do some work, and I didn’t want to wake you up, so I left the bedroom because I was on a number of phone calls, and this is a huge deal for me.
You know this, Mia. I cannot have this project fall through.
And I thought I was being respectful of your feelings by leaving, and so I came back with flowers. ”
“Flowers don’t make up for the fact that you weren’t here when I woke up this morning. And, yeah, I get that you have a job, and it’s a big deal, but I just want to be chosen.” My voice cracks slightly.
I don’t know if I’m being unreasonable. A part of me feels like I’m being really unreasonable, but another part of me feels like I deserve that. Another part of me feels like he should have known that I would need that.
“Maybe this was a mistake,” I blurt. “Maybe we shouldn’t have slept together. Maybe we should forget this ever happened and just move on with our lives.”
“How can we do that, Mia? I was inside of you last night.” He stares at my lips. “Those lips were on my cock. My tongue was on your clit. You came on my face. I can still taste you on my lips.” His fingers brush against his lips. “That sweetness, that absolutely amazing scent of—”
“Luke,” I say, blushing deeply, “I do not want to talk about that right now.”
“Why not? It happened, and we both enjoyed it. Or are you telling me you didn’t?”
I stare at him for a couple of seconds. “You just don’t get it, do you?”
“Get what, Mia?”
I rip the sheet off and stand up in front of him, naked. I see his eyes on my breasts, on my pussy, and I see them glazing over, deep with desire. I push him back onto the bed and lean down and kiss him. He reaches up and touches me softly. There is a questioning look in his eyes, but I don’t care.