CHAPTER 12 BOWER #2
“Because I want to,” he says, his hand still cupping my cheek.
“I want you to succeed. I want to see you happy. I want you to accomplish your dreams. You were there for me and Gabby for so many years. You helped us, even if it was as simple as letting Gabby bring home soup from the restaurant. You were there for us. Let me be there for you.”
My lips lightly tilt up into a smile. “I guess that’s what friends do, right?”
He slowly nods, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows. “Yup, that’s what friends do.”
I move in close and wrap my arms around him, pulling him into a hug. “Thank you, Bennett.”
His hands fall to my back as he holds me tight. “Anything for you, Bower. Anything.”
I pull away. “I’ll give it some thought. Not making any promises, but you drive a hard bargain.”
“I only have one requirement.”
“What’s that?” I ask.
“That you stay here in San Francisco. Can’t have you moving out to Almond Bay if you start a book truck.”
I chuckle and stand. “You might have to go into a bidding war with your sister.”
He stands as well and turns his hat backward, looking so incredibly adorable. “My money is on me.” He winks and then takes my hand, leading me to his front door. How did he know I needed to talk about this tonight?
The night with Cougar was okay, but I didn’t get the sense that he truly wanted my opinion on anything.
The conversation was light. And that doesn’t surprise me.
But with Bennett? He wants to know what I’m actually feeling.
He’s so invested in what I’m invested in.
Despite growing up without parents. Gabby’s love held this man together.
I must acknowledge that with her someday.
If I’m honest, I don’t want to leave. I want to stay.
I want to ask if I can spend another night in his bed, where comfort seems to consume me.
But that would be weird, right?
He has a life, and it doesn’t revolve around me.
“What’s going on in your head?” he asks.
“Huh?”
“I can see it in your expression. You’re thinking about something.”
“Oh, nothing you need to worry about.”
“It’s cute that you think you can get away with that answer.”
I take a step toward his door. “Seriously, don’t worry about it.”
He snags my hand and twirls me back toward him. “I’m worried about it, so tell me.”
Why is he like this? So kind, caring, thoughtful.
Maybe because his sister is, but where did they get such personality traits?
They grew up in a horrid foster care system.
They fought and clawed their way to get out of it and then supported themselves while achieving their goals together.
You would think they would be jaded assholes and against the world, but they’re not.
They care about others, especially me. It can be overwhelming to know you have such positivity cheering you on.
“It’s nothing important. I just haven’t set up my apartment yet and I was thinking about how comfortable your place is and how I don’t want to leave—”
“Then don’t,” he says, almost looking hopeful.
“Bennett, you have a life that’s outside of me and you have to get to bed. You have games almost every freaking day and the last thing you need is your sister’s friend crashing at your apartment.”
“Why don’t you let me tell you what I want and you stop telling me what I need?”
Oh…
That…that catches me off guard, because Bennett doesn’t usually use that tone of voice with me, nor does he say harsh things like that.
And yet…why did I like it?
“You’re right. I’m sorry,” I say. “What do you want?”
“I want you to feel comfortable, and if that means staying here tonight, then you’re staying here.”
I tug on the corner of my lip, hating that I’m putting him in this situation.
“It’s fine. My apartment is just full of boxes is all. Seriously, don’t worry about it.”
I head toward his door again and to my surprise, he follows right behind me.
“What are you doing?” I ask, looking over my shoulder.
“Wait right here,” he says and then disappears down the hall of his apartment. Within seconds, he’s back and he’s holding his cell phone charger and a toothbrush.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“Going to your apartment for the night. Let’s go. I have to get to bed, and the longer you take, the longer you’re making me stay awake.”
“Bennett, be serious.”
He grips my chin, forcing me to look him in the eyes. “I’m dead fucking serious, let’s go.”
Umm…
Okay.
The thrill that just shot between my legs is criminal, because this is Bennett, for crying out loud, but the way he just said that, the look in his eyes, the control and strength he’s exuding? It’s…oh God, it’s making my heart race.
Jesus, maybe I should have spent the night with Cougar, as it seems like my body might have needed it.
I swallow and nod, not wanting to make him madder, and I head out of his apartment, him following me after he locks up. We take the elevator up one floor and he trails behind me when we reach my apartment. I unlock it and then turn toward him.
“It’s just boxes and stuff, so don’t judge me.”
He nods toward the door. “Let me in.”
Right.
Bennett has morphed into an alpha male for the night, so I open the door and he pushes it wider as I turn on the hallway light and notice all the outfit changes I made, scattered all over the living room.
Shit, I forgot about that.
“Uh, don’t mind the clothes.” I start gathering them.
“Just had a hard time picking out an outfit.” I glance over my shoulder, where he’s taking in the apartment.
It’s smaller than his, but it has plenty of light during the day and a white kitchen, which I love.
And it’s just the right size for what I need.
“It’s, uh, it’s smaller than yours, and it doesn’t help that I haven’t unpacked or really settled anything in its rightful place.
” I stare at my couch that’s in the middle of the living room, the TV that’s still in its box.
God, he must think I’m a freak. “Just been really busy is all.”
He moves deeper into the living room, to the mantel of the fireplace, where a single picture frame decorates the top. It’s a picture of him, Gabby, and me at a fair in Almond Bay. I’m in the middle, clutching both of them.
He picks it up and examines the picture.
“That goes with me everywhere,” I say. “One of my favorite pictures. It reminds me of the small family I’ve put together that’s outside of my own.”
He glances up at me. “It’s the only family I have.”
And that makes my heart ache. “If you want, you can have it.”
He shakes his head. “Nah, you keep it. It will remind you of me when I’m gone.”
I chuckle. “As if I could forget about you. You text me all the time.”
“Eh, you text me.”
I smile and push at his shoulder playfully. “No, you text me.”
“Fifty-fifty.”
“It’s so not fifty-fifty, but whatever.”
Happy that the mood is a touch lighter, I show him my bedroom that is currently a mattress with bedding.
“Where’s your bed?”
“It was broken in the move, so I have to get a new one. Haven’t done that yet.” I sigh. “I do so much for Adalade during the day that the last thing I want to do when I get home is situate myself, you know?”
“I get that.” He looks around some more. “But you can’t live like this.”
“I know. I’ll work on it.”
“I can help.”
“Bennett.” I tip my head to the side. “No, you have done enough. You shouldn’t even be here right now, but I’m being a baby.”
“Benefits me.” He moves into the bathroom, where he plucks my toothpaste from the corner of my counter.
“How does this benefit you?” I ask.
Smirking, he says, “When I go out of town, I won’t feel guilty asking you to do shit for me.”
“At this point, I’m going to be in your debt for at least a decade.”
“Just the way I like it.” He winks and then turns back to the mirror, where he brushes his teeth.
With that, I go to my closet, where my clothes are strewn all over, and I grab a pair of pajama shorts and an oversized T-shirt before heading back into the bathroom, where Bennett is finishing up.
“Um, can you help me with my dress?” I turn my back toward him and feel his body move closer to mine, the heat of it overwhelming as his hand falls to my hip.
Chills break out over my skin as he slowly raises his other hand to the zipper of my dress.
What the hell is going on with me?
“Sure,” he says softly and then slowly…and I mean, slowly, tugs down the zipper of my dress, one tine at a time, before it’s all the way undone, my dress barely hanging on as I turn back around to face him, his eyes lasering in on me, the light blue almost looking dark.