CHAPTER 33 BOWER #2
I look up into his eyes. “My attraction to you. I thought for a moment that I was broken. That I didn’t know how to get aroused anymore, but then every time you came near me, or held my hand, or snuggled into me, a bout of electricity zapped through me.
I tried to deny it, but that feeling only grew stronger.
” I rub my hand over his chest. “I’m sorry I left you in the hallway like that.
” I feel tears spring to my eyes from the expression he gave me when I bolted. “I was scared—”
“Shh,” he says, placing his finger over my lips. “No need to apologize. We’re here now, together, that’s all that matters.”
“I know, but I don’t want you thinking I didn’t want you, because I did. I was just struggling with admitting that.”
“You don’t need to explain.”
“I do.” I wet my lips. “You matter to me, Bennett. So much, more than I ever expected, and I’m so sorry that for a moment I made you think you didn’t matter.”
He leans down and captures my mouth with a soft, thoughtful kiss. When he pulls away, his forehead connects with mine. “I’ve been in this headspace for years, where I accepted you as the person I was supposed to be with. You’re just getting there. But you’re here now, and that’s all that matters.”
I nod against him and then say, “I do think we need to talk.”
“Yeah, I saw that coming. Want to talk in bed?”
“Sure,” I answer.
We both finish drying off and then he hangs my towel, leaving me naked as he leads me back to his bed. I pause and ask, “Naked?”
“Going to tell you right now—from here on out, if you’re in my bed, I expect you to be naked.”
I chuckle and lift up on my toes, pressing a kiss to his jaw. “I think I can be okay with that.”
We both slide into bed and face each other as his hand falls on my hip, pulling me in a few inches closer. When his eyes connect with mine, he slightly shakes his head, almost as if he’s in awe.
“What?” I ask.
“I’m just struggling to comprehend that I’m not dreaming. That this is all real and I’m not going to wake up any moment and have it all taken away from me.”
“It’s real. It’s so real that it’s freaking me out.”
“Because of Gabby?” he asks.
“Yeah.” And damn it, I get emotional all over again. Tears spring to my eyes and I swear under my breath from not being able to control my feelings on this. “Sorry.” I wipe at my eyes.
“Don’t apologize. You’re allowed to have these feelings. You and Gabby are practically sisters.”
“We are. We’ve been through so much together that I don’t want this to break us apart, and I know it will.”
“Not if we don’t let it,” he says, so certain that it almost makes me mad.
“She’s not going to talk to me, Bennett. She was adamant about me not getting involved with you. I’m her friend and I’m supposed to protect you, and God, we have fucked so many times.”
He chuckles and I push at his chest.
“Not funny.”
“It’s kind of funny.”
“It’s not. I can’t stop myself. I’m insatiable. I really think there is something wrong with me. I’ve never been like this with anyone else.”
“Thanks, babe. Makes me feel special.”
“Bennett,” I groan, pushing at him again. “You’re not supposed to make light of this.”
“First of all, if we don’t make light of it, then you’re going to keep crying, and I won’t stand for you crying when it comes to you and me. Second of all…is it my dick? Is that what has you all randy and ready to go?”
“Oh my God, I’m leaving.” I start to turn over, but he laughs some more and pulls me in close, trapping me under his arms so I’m caged in.
“You’re not going anywhere. And in all seriousness, we’ll figure this out, okay?
We don’t have to tell her right away. We can keep this quiet and just between us.
We can have dates here, in our apartments so no one can spot us together, and we can build up our relationship until you’re ready to tell her. ”
“You wouldn’t mind that?”
“Bower, I’ve waited so fucking long to be in this position with you that I don’t care if I have to wait a year to go out in public with you. As long as I know you’re mine, then I’m good.”
I lift my hand to his cheek, rubbing the scruff with my thumb. “I want to tell her. I just have to figure out how.”
“I know.” He turns his head and kisses my palm.
“I’m not trying to hide you or anything. I don’t want you to think I’m ashamed.”
“Trust me, from the way you were screaming my name, I know for a fact you’re not ashamed.”
I’d roll my eyes, but he’s right.
“Do you think your neighbors heard?”
“I think the entire apartment building heard.”
“Bennett, seriously.”
He smirks. “Seriously, Bower, you were fucking loud.” I cover my face and he chuckles, nuzzling his nose into the side of my neck. “Hot as shit, though, and I can’t wait to make you scream again.”
“Given your stamina, I’d say it would be in the next couple of minutes.”
“Don’t tempt me,” he says, as he starts to massage my breast.
I moan lightly and melt into the mattress. “Wait, before you go any further,” I say, my hand to his chest, “can you promise me that you will let me tell Gabby?”
He kisses my neck, my cheek. “I promise. This is all on your schedule, when you’re comfortable. But can you promise me one thing too?”
“Depends, what is it?”
He grows serious. “End things with Cougar. I can’t fucking take the thought of you with him.”
“I already ended it with him when I came back up here.”
“Yeah?” he asks, looking so adorably excited.
“Yeah.”
“So you’re all mine?”
“Pretty sure you know the answer to that after you came all over my tits.”
His smile grows. “Maybe I need to do it again just to make sure.”
“I think I’d prefer it.”
He growls and then moves down my body, spreads my legs, and buries his face between them.
God, he’s so perfect.