Chapter Sixteen
Tori
Do you want to stay?
My own question to Kincaid reverberated in my thoughts the following morning as I came awake slowly. I felt deeply rested and relaxed. I couldn’t recall why for a moment. My mind was blank for a few beats before I began to catalogue the feel of Kincaid beside me.
I was pressed against him, my head tucked into the curve of his shoulder. His arm was loosely curled around me, and I felt his palm resting on the side of my hip. I felt deliciously good. I loved the feel of him strong against my side.
Not wanting to break the moment, I took in a careful breath.
I could see out the windows from where I was resting against him.
The mountains were silhouetted by the shimmering sun just along the edges.
Sunrise would be here soon. I loved spring in Alaska.
It was beautiful. It felt like the world was bursting with life after the quiet, dark months of winter.
Although I didn’t want to disrupt this moment, my bladder had other opinions.
I eased away from Kincaid, carefully rolling out of bed and tiptoeing into the bathroom.
After I took care of business, I washed my hands and splashed water on my face.
I’d been cursed with being one of those people who really never fell back asleep once I woke.
Much as I wanted to return to bed and feel sleepy again, I knew I was likely awake for the day now.
I studied myself in the mirror for a moment. My cheeks were still pink with the flush of sleep, and my hair was a mess of tangled locks.
Just as I was contemplating hopping in the shower, I heard Kincaid’s voice. “Tori?”
I opened the door, and it felt like my body came awake instantly, every cell coming alive like the rise of a flock of birds shifting suddenly from the ground into motion with a cacophony of calls.
Kincaid’s hair was mussed, and he had a shadow of stubble on his jaw.
He stood there in his boxers, his muscled arms relaxed at his sides.
“Hi,” I said, instantly flushing.
Because what a silly thing to say, as though I was greeting him. As though what had passed between us last night had never happened.
“Good morning,” he returned with a smile teasing the corners of his mouth.
With my body humming, I held his gaze as heat suffused me. My belly felt all tingly, and my heart felt flipped over in my chest. When my eyes dipped down, they landed on the lengthening swell of his arousal.
Without thinking—something that I was discovering happened with Kincaid often—I reached for his hand. “Let’s shower,” I murmured.
Moments later, the hot water was cascading around us, and Kincaid’s hands were smoothing over my sides. I spun around, giggling a little. “Good morning,” I belatedly offered.
His low chuckle spun into the sensations ricocheting through me. “It is a good morning,” he replied.
I traced my fingertip along the stubbled edge of his jaw before dipping my head to press kisses along his collarbone. I was gratified at the sound of his breath sucking in through his teeth.
“Tori,” he murmured, his voice gruff and sending goosebumps over my skin.
Everything with Kincaid was a different sensation, drawing a different reaction from my body. All of them were oriented towards two things—him and this feeling between us.
I lightly trailed my fingertips over his chest and abs before curling my palm around his length and stroking. His breath hissed through his teeth again, and I pressed him back. I heard his hand slap against the wall.
I didn’t hesitate and leaned down, lightly teasing my tongue around the tip of his shaft. His fingers laced in my wet hair.
“Tori,” he growled.
My only answer was, “Mmm-hmm?” around his cock as I sucked him into my mouth.
His fingers tightened in my hair. I knelt down, angling my head to the side to glance up as I drew away and released him with a little pop.
“You don’t have to—” he began.
I cut him off. “I want to.” On the heels of a breath, I sucked him in again.
I felt his shaft pulse as I dragged my tongue along the underside.
Adding a little suction when I reached the tip again, I curled my palm loosely around his length.
I stroked up and down as I teased him. He muttered something unintelligible, and I hummed a little bit in reply.
I felt his cock pulse again, and the taste of his release danced over my tongue. Just before I sucked him in once more, and he jerked. His fingers gripped even more tightly in my hair. I drew back as his release spurted out over my hand and down onto my chest.
When I looked up at him, his eyes were dark and his breath coming in heaves. He slowly eased his grip in my hair and pulled me up to standing. We tumbled into a kiss.
Kincaid spun us around, pressing me against the wall as he deftly teased his fingers into my folds.
I was already wet. I had been since I’d woken.
Now, with his fingers pumping in and out of my channel, I was gasping, clinging to him as he fucked me with his fingers.
Somehow, he knew just when to give me the right amount of pressure with his thumb exactly where I needed it.
I cried out, shuddering and barely able to stand as I sagged against the tiled wall.
I stared at him, my breath coming in ragged gasps. “That was fast,” I finally managed.
Kincaid’s smile was a little wicked. “Well, I could say the same.”
Before I knew it, I was giggling with a sense of giddiness rising like champagne bubbles inside.
We properly showered after that, before getting dressed and going downstairs. It was still early, but now the sun’s rays were breaking in an arc over the mountains.
Bella was still sound asleep. “Does she ever move from that bed?” Kincaid asked, eyeing her affectionately.
“Sometimes. She used to sleep in my bed with me, but she can’t jump up anymore.” I felt a little sad whenever I thought about that sign of her age. “I know she can’t live forever, but she’s my best friend. I’m hoping for some kind of miracle.”
His eyes were warm as he held my gaze. “She seems pretty healthy for her age. How old did you say she was?”
“Almost fourteen. The vet says she’s in good shape with no major health problems other than arthritis.”
“Well, there you go,” he said with a soft smile.
We fell quiet. The silence stretched between us—not uncomfortable, exactly, but uncertain, at least for me. It was a kind of uncertainty that stemmed from something bigger.
I had never actually spent a full night with a man before. I wasn’t some sheltered innocent when it came to sex. And yet, no one had ever meant enough for me to feel comfortable having them stay.
“I need to get home, just to check on my mom,” he finally said.
“And report back on your whereabouts for the night?” I teased lightly.
His lips curled at the corners as he shrugged slightly. “Not quite. She doesn’t expect me to report in. But I do like to check in and make sure she’s doing okay every morning.”
He took a breath, his shoulders rising with it. I could tell he was working through something in his mind and waited. “I want to see you again, Tori,” he said softly.
“Oh, I’m sure you will.” My voice sounded chirpy, as if I’d been surprised mid-sneeze. I tried to rally and sound casual. I was desperate, for myself, not to seem as if this was as big of a deal as it felt inside. “I mean, it’s a small town. It’ll be hard not to see you.”
Kincaid smiled faintly. “But I meant see you. Like, take you out to dinner, lunch, breakfast—whatever you want.”
I blinked. I didn’t know why this surprised me, but it did. “Okay,” I said, clearing my throat. “I feel like I should point this out right now, just so we’re crystal clear—I don’t do the whole ‘seeing multiple people at a time’ thing.”
“I haven’t dated anybody in, well, not since I started taking care of my mom.” He shook his head slightly.
“I just wanted to put that out there,” I added, so uncertain how to handle my own feelings here. I liked Kincaid. Probably way more than I should.
“To clarify, it’s been years since I dated. I’ve never tried to ‘see’ multiple people at a time,” he replied.
As soon as he added that, I noticed the discomfort in his expression. He shifted slightly, like maybe he’d said too much.
Even if our reasons were entirely different, it helped to sense his discomfort.
It wasn’t that I wanted him to feel uncomfortable, but more that I didn’t feel so alone in how vulnerable I felt.
He didn’t need to know just how hung up I was on trust, or how the very idea of relying on anyone else emotionally in any way was terrifying for me.
“I know this is fresh. I don’t have expectations. I’m not saying—” I started and then stopped abruptly.
He stepped closer and reached for my hand.
His touch was instantly grounding. His thumb brushed a slow motion over my knuckles.
“I know it’s just been one night. One date, and two kisses before that, but I like you.
I’m not saying we need to make it more serious than it is.
I just, well, I felt like I should be clear.
” He let out a breath. “I’ve never done the online dating thing, but I hear it’s a nightmare with people playing games and mixed expectations.
So I just wanted you to know, I’m not that kind of guy. ”
“I know you’re not that guy.”
“You do?”
I bit my lip and nodded. “I guess I do know that about you. You’re a good man, Kincaid.”
While my doubts clamored in the corners of my mind over the following days, I kept trying to remind myself of one thing: I did believe Kincaid was a good man. My gut trusted him.
And yet, I remembered—before I found out about my dad and Shelly—I would have bet my soul that neither of them could ever betray the people who loved them. But they had. For an entire decade.
And, doubt? Doubt was a mean girl and practically a professional in my thoughts. My doubts were old and well-formed. They knew the routine and how to make sure I questioned everything and everyone.