Lake
LAKE
I get a sharp reminder of why I don’t get drunk once morning comes. Pleasantly tipsy? Why not. Nicely buzzed? Sign me up. Stupidly drunk? That’s pretty much just fucking yourself over with extra steps.
I rub my palm over my face while I drag myself to the kitchen and slump down at the table. Ryker sends me an amused look and slides a smoothie in front of me.
I poke the tall glass with the tip of my finger for a few seconds.
“Is that some new way kids drink these days?” Ryk leans his ass against the counter and crosses his arms over his chest. “Because I could’ve sworn we used our mouths for that.”
“I’m trying to see if this is some kind of magic trick where if I touch it, this thing turns into something with a shitload of caffeine in it.”
“That would be a no.”
I make a face and push the glass far, far away from me. “Then I don’t understand.”
“Which part?”
“The part where you’re giving me something that’s not coffee.”
He taps his index finger against the side of the glass. “This is good for you.”
I lift my hand and press my fingers against his mouth. “Shh. Don’t let the neighbors hear you say that. They’ll think you’re insane.”
“Just drink it,” he says in a tone that brooks no arguments.
Ha! Like that’s going to happen.
“What’s in it?”
“Fruit,” he says offhandedly before he turns and opens the oven door. The tone is suspicious already. The fact that he refuses to look at me? I call bullshit on that fruit claim.
“What kind of fruit?”
He turns back around, crosses his arms over his chest once again and locks his gaze with mine. “The kind that grows on trees.”
“What kind of trees?”
“Fruit trees.”
“Be more specific.”
“Mango and banana. Plus, some strawberries and raspberries, coconut water, and some lemon juice. Will you just fucking drink it already?”
“And?”
He rolls his eyes. “And what?”
“Don’t even. We both know you put something disgusting in it because you think I won’t know. What is it?”
We stare each other down for a long while. Ryk breaks first. Because Ryk always breaks first. I don’t even know why he tries.
“Spinach,” he says.
“I knew it!” I exclaim. Then I take the glass and take a sip. And then another one until the glass is empty.
“Did the complaining and interrogation make it taste better?” Ryker asks.
“It’s like seasoning.”
He turns off the oven and pulls out a pan with baked eggs, mushrooms, more spinach, and bacon. In another moment, a plate appears in front of me.
He takes a seat opposite me, and we eat. And while we do that, he presses the side of his foot against mine under the table. I smile at him, and he smiles back. We’ve been having breakfast like this for a while now. It never gets old. It never stops my heart from jumping in my chest because I still can’t quite believe I’ve hit this kind of jackpot in life.
“How’s your head?” Ryker asks.
“Could be worse. I think.” I contemplate the hangover for a bit. Then a memory hits, and my eyes widen. “Oh, shit. Please tell me applying to Naked and Afraid didn’t happen.”
He smirks. “Buckle up, baby. The jungle awaits.”
“I’d think you were kidding, but I’m honestly not sure anymore.”
“But you said you’d be good at it,” Ryker says. “You had that whole plan about making clothes out of leaves and fashioning a spear to catch game.”
I send him a glare. “You know, there’s a thing as being too supportive.”
“I didn’t think that was possible.”
“Yeah, well. If I get in, I’m backing out and blaming you.”
He snickers and rubs his foot against mine again. “You can breathe easy. I confiscated Kelly’s phone once he started signing you up.”
“I love you,” I say with more than a little bit of relief in my tone.
“Let’s finish the breakfast, and you can show me just how much.”
“I’ll even do the dishes before,” I promise solemnly.
He laughs and gets up. “Meet you in bed.”
Don’t mind if I do.
The rest of the weekend goes by too quickly, and before I know it, it’s Monday morning and I have to go to school.
We already established that I’m not good at change, and even though medical school is the kind of change I actually wanted, and I worked my ass off to get here, my nerves are still running rampant.
It feels like most of my life so far has been leading up to this moment. I’m a medical student.
And I really wish I could just stay at home and never leave the bed.
The hell was I thinking when I applied to fucking medical school ? I bet they’ll take one look at me and somehow figure out I’m way out my depth and probably shouldn’t even be there.
Those nerves that have been running rampant in my belly since last night? They’re starting to feel like legitimate nausea by now. So… I either throw up right now because I’ve possibly contracted some nasty virus, miss my first day, and make a terrible impression. Or I’ll manage to get myself together enough to drag myself to school, puke in front of everybody, and make a terrible impression.
Cool.
Both solid options.
Ryker wraps his arm tighter around me and pulls me against him. My back is against his solid, warm, wide chest, and for a moment, I feel calmer.
Of course, then I remember I’m starting fucking medical school today, so the calm quickly vanishes.
Ryker’s hand covers my chest where my heart is going haywire. He holds it there for a little while before kissing the nape of my neck.
“Would it help if I told you to be calm and breathe?” he asks.
“What exactly do you think I’ve been trying to do here?” I grumble.
He hums and kisses the spot behind my ear. His palm moves up my chest to my throat, then back down to my chest. And then lower, over my solar plexus to my abdomen.
“And it’s not working?” he asks.
I turn over onto my back. “What if I’m too dumb?” I say. “What if I flunk out my first week there because I can’t hack it?”
“What if you don’t?” Ryk counters.
I send him an unimpressed look. “Are you just saying things to say things?”
His lips twitch, but he has enough common sense not to laugh. Good for him. Smart choice.
“You won’t know until you’ve tried,” he says reasonably.
I’m sure a lot of people would prefer their husband to say something like ‘You’ll never flunk out because you’re incredibly smart, fabulously beautiful, and the sexiest person I’ve ever laid my eyes on, so they’d never expel you ever.’
I prefer Ryker’s answer to my existential crisis. It’s not like he can guarantee that nothing bad will ever happen, so it’s preferable that he doesn’t pretend like it never could.
I feel marginally calmer.
“You know what my PT told me when I was bitching about the physical therapy being pointless because I was never going to make it back on the ice anyway?”
I shake my head slowly.
“He told me not to say no to myself. That he couldn’t promise me everything was going to go my way in the end, but I shouldn’t sabotage myself by giving up before I’d even started.”
I mull that over for a second before I nod. “That’s pretty solid advice.”
“I know,” he says smugly. “What time is it?”
I pick up my phone and glance at the display. I’m up way before the alarm because of all those damn nerves. “Barely six.”
“Plenty of time, then.”
“For?” I ask, but before he can answer, I narrow my eyes. “If you’re going to say something like, to go for a morning run, then forget it. I’ll pretend I’m still asleep, just a word of warning.”
“I had something else in mind, actually.”
“What?” I ask, still somewhat suspicious.
“Something physical.”
“I just—” I start to speak, but he sends me a grin that’s pure heat, and then suddenly he’s straddling me.
“Oh,” I say as a whoosh of breath escapes my mouth. “Yeah, I can definitely get behind this kind of physical activity.”
Ryk sends me a smug smile. “Somehow, I thought you would.”
“You know me so well.” I sigh happily.
He lowers his head and kisses the corner of my mouth, and my dick jerks in anticipation.
He sends me a look that’s burning with heat and starts to kiss his way down my body. He nips at my throat and his teeth graze my right nipple. His tongue traces its way down my chest and over my stomach, and before I know it, he’s worked his way down between my thighs.
He takes me in his hand and gives my cock a few pumps. My breathing picks up when he twists his hand, opting for slow, torturously gentle strokes. He lowers his head again and his tongue laves over the ridges in the muscles of my lower abdomen. I yelp when he nips at my hip bone and glare at him, but then he’s suddenly down on the floor, and before I can fully compute what’s happening, he’s dragged me to the edge of the bed so he’s kneeling between my thighs.
A shiver runs through me at the look of lust in his eyes as his gaze tracks over every inch of my body. There’s pure hunger in the way he looks at me, but he seems in no hurry to get a taste just yet.
He trails his hands down my flanks and hips until he’s cupping my ass, massaging the cheeks. My cock is rock hard; so hard it’s painful when it bounces against my stomach.
Still no mouth on it.
“Ryk, I swear to God,” I growl.
He smirks, licks his palm, then strokes my cock.
My head falls back for a moment before I push myself up on my elbow. I run the fingers of my other hand through Ryk’s dark hair until I’m gripping the strands at the back of his head.
“Do it,” I rasp, pulling him closer to my cock. “Come on, baby. Please. Suck me.”
Ryker takes the head of my cock in his mouth.
My hips arch upward immediately, hand still in his hair. Slowly, I push in as far as he can take me. When the tip of my dick hits the back of his throat, Ryk lets out a groan. He looks indescribable like this—on his knees for me, mouth full of my cock, eyes hooded.
“Ryk,” I gasp.
The devilish spark intensifies. He cups my balls while he starts to suck me in long, deep strokes, mouth moving up and down, tongue laving over the sensitive skin. Shivers run up and down my spine, making it feel liquid.
This attraction between us has always been just a bit too much. Explosive in its intensity. So loud and visceral that it’s still just a bit scary if I’m being honest with myself.
But I’m already on the ride, so even if it feels like it’s careening wildly out of control, it’s not like I’m going to get off. I can’t. All I can do is hold on and enjoy.
Ryk’s mouth and tongue are still busy on me, and he goes down on me almost worshipfully, sucking me so hard it feels like he’s trying to suck my brains out through my cock.
My body grows tighter and tighter with each pull of his mouth, and my hips start pushing up faster. I’m still gripping his hair. It has to hurt by now, considering how tightly I’m holding on, but I can’t seem to do anything about it.
“Ryk,” I gasp again, a harsh whisper of need. My hips snap up, cock deep in Ryk’s throat.
He jerks the base with his hand and sucks so hard his cheeks hollow.
I come with a harsh shout, cock pulsing against Ryk’s tongue, burst after burst hitting the back of his throat.
I fall back on the bed, my bones feeling like jelly.
Ryk keeps sucking and licking me while my cock softens in his mouth, before he makes his way up my body, one kiss at a time, until he reaches my mouth. My whole body is quivering with aftershocks, and I pull his head down until our lips meet. He pushes his tongue inside my mouth, and I can taste myself.
Every muscle in Ryker’s body is tense as he hovers above me.
I wrap my leg around him and roll us over. I land on top of him, and he groans out loud. Our hips are flush together, my soft cock cradled against his hard one.
“Move,” he rasps, grabbing my hips.
I start rubbing against him. We’re a mess of saliva, cum, and sweat, our bodies slick with the mix of it.
It only takes a few moments.
Hips flush against hips. Cock against cock.
He comes in a harsh exhale, body tightening beneath me, slick, hot heat pooling between our skin.
His arms wrap around me, and I slump down on top of him. Fingers play with the ridges of my spine.
“Feeling more relaxed now?” Ryk’s voice is a low rumble in my ears.
“Definitely. A bunch.” I’m slurring my words from being half-drunk with pleasure. “Now you just have to come to school with me and do it all over again when I get nervous, and we should be good.”
“That would make an unforgettable impression on your first day.”
I hum in reply while he keeps moving his fingers up and down my back, leaving tiny sparks of pleasure behind.
We’re both silent for a little while, and I’m close to nodding off.
“You’ll do great,” Ryk says. “You know that, right?”
“Now you’ve jinxed it.”
“That’s not a thing.”
“I guess we’ll see.”
He laughs softly, chest vibrating under mine.
“Do you remember the first time we met?”
I lift my head and look at him. “That was in kindergarten. I’m pretty sure neither of us remembers when we first met.”
“I do,” he says.
“No, you don’t,” I scoff.
He just looks at me, lips quirked in an amused, enigmatic smile.
“You don’t,” I say again.
I study him some more.
“Do you?”
“I do. You were wearing yellow shorts and a blue T-shirt with a picture of a yellow excavator on it, and you had the biggest blue eyes I’d ever seen in a person’s face. I think it’s a bit of an optical illusion because they’re so light.” He swipes his thumb over the skin under my left eye. “You tripped Jason Wheeler when he kicked a ball at some kid’s head.” He grins. “That’s when I decided to seduce you.”
“Wow. You were way more advanced than the average kindergartner. Just out of curiosity, what’s the timeline here? We met when we were five. You were intrigued by the immediate display of violence. And seventeen years later, boom. Seduction.”
He laughs again. “I wanted to seduce you to be my friend. I wanted to make you like me.”
I raise my brows. I’ve never heard this story. “Really? Why?”
He shrugs. “You were just so damn cool.”
I let out a kind of scoff-snort hybrid, immediately contradicting Ryker. “That’s not the word I’d use.”
“You were. I really wanted to be your friend.”
“Success.”
His fingertips map the edge of my jaw for a second before he meets my gaze. “I guess technically I got more than I bargained for.”
“Are you complaining?”
“Just stating a fact.” He laughs and wiggles a bit when I pinch his side. “Come on. Time to get up. You have stuff to do.”
A shower and breakfast later, I’m dressed and ready to go. It feels like a slice of routine. Something normal. Something I’ve done hundreds of times before. It’s just going to school. And unlike a lot of other things, I’m actually good at school.
That helps calm my nerves a bit.
Plus, once I’m up and on the go, it’s easier because it’s like I’m crossing off items on a to-do list.
Put on shoes. Check.
Open door. Check.
Head outside. Check.
It’s a beautiful September day. Ryker is walking next to me, hands in pockets, a smile on his face. We don’t talk, but that’s the nice thing about him—I get to be silent with him, and it doesn’t ever feel awkward.
We go to the subway and jump on the train. It’s a fifteen-minute ride from our place, so it’s not too bad. Of course, I’ve prepared for every type of catastrophe or mishap, so we left ridiculously early. Ryker doesn’t complain. It’s not like he needs to come with me and hold my hand. He should be at the gym right now anyway, but when he asked me if I wanted him to come, I just nodded, so here he is. It’s very typical of Ryker to sense when somebody needs something and then just do it. It’s very much not typical of me to accept this kind of kindness.
It’s a remnant from my childhood. Do not trust anybody. Always stand alone and only on your own two feet. Count only on yourself.
I’ve followed those unwritten rules meticulously.
But then Ryker came and calmly planted himself in my life, and I made an exception.
Do not trust anybody (except for Ryker).
Always stand alone and only on your own two feet (unless you need to lean on Ryker, in which case lean away).
Count only on yourself (and Ryker).
Once we reach the campus, we both stop.
I could kiss him.
Only I can’t.
Not with this many people milling around everywhere.
“Give them hell,” Ryk says. He holds his arms out, and I blink in surprise, but then I’m suddenly engulfed in a hug.
It’s not that I don’t want the hug.
I do.
But I’m also so fucking aware how many people there are all around us.
“Even friends hug,” Ryker murmurs in my ear, because he can read my thoughts or my stiff body language or something.
I make a deliberate effort to relax and not be a paranoid asshole. I’m not sure how successful I am.
“You’re going to the gym?” I ask once I’ve pulled away from him.
“Right after my run.”
“Well, have fun,” I say. And now I do feel awkward all of a sudden. It’s an unwelcome, loud feeling of awkwardness. The kind where it feels like I’ve done something wrong, even though I can’t seem to put my finger on what exactly it was.
“I will.”
And with those words, he’s gone. I look after him until he disappears around a corner, and then I waste some more time looking at the corner.
Eventually, I shake my head and turn away.
“Get a grip,” I mumble under my breath.
I grab my phone and double check where I have to be and when, even though I already know.
I take a deep breath.
And start to walk.