Chapter 14 Frankie
Frankie
Isit apart from the Holloways, not because I don’t want to join them, but because of how badly I do.
The way they laugh and tease reminds me of how Archie, Dex, Rhys, and I are with each other.
Dex and Rhys aren’t blood related, but they’re brothers to me and Archie.
I don’t know their partners well, but Britta and Stella already feel like sisters.
Even Archie’s girlfriend, Piper, who used to be our stepsister is more family now than she ever was when Malcolm was married to her mum. They’re my chosen family.
Being around the Holloways, though, has made it hard for me to ignore how much I miss my own “family.” Part of my ache for them, I’m sure, is mobile withdrawal since it’s back at the house, still dead, keeping secret all the messages in the Absolutely Not Malcolm Chat.
I can’t remember the last time I’ve gone this long without “talking” to any of them, especially Archie.
But then Jo ambles over and hands me a plate of chicken salad and homemade rolls, along with my mobile.
“I charged it for you,” she says. “We can’t live without these things anymore, can we? It’s been pinging all morning. I hope you didn’t miss anything important.”
“Cheers, Jo.” My stupid throat is tight as I take the mobile from her, forcing myself not to hug her for being so thoughtful. Like a real mum.
I swallow hard and squeeze back the ridiculous tears trying to spring up out of nowhere for no reason at all. When I open them, I don’t look anywhere besides my mobile, even when Junie says my name.
Keep it together, mate. I repeat over and over in my head as I scroll through the fifty-three texts waiting for me.
As I suspected, most of the messages I’ve missed are from the ANM chat. Along with the texts, I have a dozen voice messages, mostly from Archie. Each text and voicemail grows increasingly panicked when their questions go unanswered. I read half of them before I stop to shoot off a text.
I’m all good. Calm down. Mobile was dead.
Then I go back to read the rest of the messages, hoping they haven’t gone and filed a missing person report.
Junie sits down half on me and half off. “Can I play a game on your phone, Frankie?” she reaches for my mobile, and I tug it away.
“No, love. I’ve got messages I need to read.” My “friends” convo with Cal replays in my head, along with my promise to not hurt his little girl.
Frustration bubbles in my chest. Dunno if the convo is to blame or the fact Junie’s crawling all over me while I’m trying to assure my mates I haven’t been kidnapped by some weird sex cult. Because, of course, that’s where Archie would go. Straight to the worst.
“Then can we pick cados?” Junie gets right in my face, so there’s no avoiding looking her straight on.
“I need to go into town with your daddy, but I’ll be back later.” Hard as I try, impatience slips into my voice.
Junie doesn’t notice, just keeps trying to crawl into my lap. “Can I go too?”
“Junie I’ve got something to show you,” Hayes calls from a few feet away.
“What?” she asks suspiciously.
“Come over here, and you’ll see.”
With a sigh, Junie walks to Hayes, dragging her feet, and I send him a grateful nod.
The group chat suddenly explodes with questions about where I am and why I didn’t charge my mobile. Reckon they got my message.
Before I can answer, Archie pings me separately.
Dad’s asking to see us.
The words sucker punch me, even though I shouldn’t be surprised.
Malcolm’s probably seen news about where I am.
I wonder if he was surprised to find out I was hiding in plain sight.
I hope so. I hope he feels as betrayed by me as I did when he lied to me, then blamed me for his own lies about Rancho Mirage.
Beneath the hard layer of revenge, though, is the sharp rocky soil of fear. I didn’t expect a message from Malcolm to come from my brother. They haven’t spoken in over a year.
Malcolm cut us both off—at least financially—but it’s been years longer for me than for Archie. After I told Malcolm I didn’t want him or his money in my life, I knew my father would find some other way to keep me tied to him. That’s why I’ve been hiding from him. He’s not one to let go of control.
I just hope Archie’s not fallen back in his clutches.
You talked to him?
Sybil left a message.
What does he want?
Dunno. Can I ring you?
Now’s not good. Later?
I expect a thumbs up, but thought bubbles appear instead, then another message:
McVey’s been lurking around. Cornered Dex. Said he has a message he needs to give you.
I read the words twice before, suddenly, I can’t breathe. Literally. Junie’s back and got her arms wrapped around me, choking me while begging for a piggyback ride. I loosen her arms from around my neck, gasp for breath.
“Not now, Junie,” I snap loud enough for all the Holloways to go quiet.
I shrink under the weight of their collective stare. Junie’s lip quivers. I’ve done it now.
“I’m sorry,” I say softly.
“Junie, come over here. Leave Frankie alone,” Cal orders, and Junie hurries to him.
“She scared me,” I offer weakly.
Cal nods and sits about as far away from me as possible, pulling Junie into his lap. And I feel like a right cow.
I go back to my messaging with Archie
What kind of message?
No clue.
Dex didn’t tell him where I am, did he?
‘Course not. But he’s looking. Ring me when you can talk.
I send him a thumbs up, then quickly eat my lunch, trying not to look at Junie or Cal, afraid I’ve already broken my promise not to hurt either one of them.
Not just because I snapped, but because, between Malcolm and Brandon there’s no way the Holloways’ paradise won’t be disrupted if either of them finds out I’m here.
A shadow covers me, and I look up to see Hayes standing above me. He squats down.
“We’ve all lost it with her a time or two,” he says quietly. “Even me. She’s a lot. But you’re really good with her. More patient than most of us.”
“Cheers, Cowboy.” I force a smile.
“You’re good with avocados too.”
“Now you’re just putting on the charm.”
“Can’t put something on you were born with.” He winks, and I let out a laugh that not even worrying about Brandon and Malcolm in cahoots can stop. “Let me get you more to eat.”
Hayes reaches for my plate. My eyes dart to Cal, who’s glaring, and I don’t know if it’s about Hayes flirting with me or my snapping at Junie. Either way, I think I need to do some repair.
“Can’t fit another bite in, but thanks.” Still holding my plate, I pop up. “I’ll help clean. You done?”
Before he can answer, I take Hayes’s empty paper plate, and walk around the circle of Holloways, collecting more plates, soda cans, and other rubbish.
“Don’t you dare try to clean up,” Jo says before I reach her. “You’ve already done enough helping harvest today.”
Cassidy is by my side before Jo finishes, taking the plates from me and being a bit grumpy about it. “I’ll do it.”
Before I can argue, she adds, “You saved me from working out here today. I owe you.” Her mouth does something that could be a smile but goes back to her normal glower too fast to be certain.
When I reach Cal, he holds up his half-eaten roll. “Let me finish my lunch, and I’ll take you into town.”
“I want to go with Frankie,” Junie says, and I assume I’ve been forgiven.
“Sorry, Bug. I’ve got appointments. You get to stay here with Jo-Joe.”
“No, I want to go.” Junie stamps her foot. “I stay with Frankie at Fingo’s and you go to pointments.”
Cal opens his mouth when Bennett swoops in and picks up Junie like she’s an airplane and sails her through the air. “How about I take you on the ATV?”
Cal tenses. “No, Bennett.”
“She’ll wear a helmet, and we’ll go slow.” Bennett sets Junie back on the ground, and she grabs his fist with both of her hands.
Cal shakes his head.
“Yes, Daddy, please,” Junie begs as Bennett raises his arm, lifting her off the ground.
“It’s how we do work around here, Cal. She’s going to have to learn to ride sometime.” Ben’s voice isn’t dismissive, but gentle. Pragmatic.
“I’ll keep an eye on them, son.” Jo rests a hand on Cal’s shoulder. “If she learns young, she’ll grow up understanding how to ride safe, just like you and your brothers. Rules work better than restrictions.”
Cal lets out a deep sigh. I see him fighting with himself, but he doesn’t argue with them anymore. He also doesn’t finish his lunch.
Bennett leads Junie to the ATV’s, listing the rules and responsibilities that go with riding on a four-wheeler then making her repeat them.
“Ready to head in?” Cal asks me, and I tear my eyes away from Bennett, Junie, and the rest of the Holloways.
I nod and follow him toward the house. “What’s the difference between a rule and a restriction?” I ask.
His eyebrows go up and his eyes dart back and forth like he’s looking for an answer. “I never really asked. That’s something Mom and Dad always said, and it just kinda made sense. I never questioned it, but since you asked, I guess a restriction is a hard no. A rule has a reason behind it.”
“So, is it your family motto, then? The rules and restrictions bit?” I feel like I’ve been let in on the secret to what makes the Holloways the rare happy family.
“I guess so.” Cal chuckles and the pinching in my chest eases.
“My family’s motto is manipulation is king. Or maybe it’s money is king; love and kindness are lowly peasants. Not even peasants, really. What’s below a peasant?” I laugh at my joke, but Cal doesn’t. He just looks at me.
“Your parents really did a number on you, didn’t they Frankie?”
I snort. “Dad for sure. Mum’s mistakes I unpacked in a few therapy sessions, but I ran out of money before I could sort through all the baggage from Malcolm.”
Again, I’m the only one laughing.
“I’m sorry.” Cal’s sincerity brings back the tightness in my throat Jo caused a bit ago.
“Nothing to be sorry about. It is what it is.” I squeeze the words out fast but not before my voice cracks.
“You need another hug?” Cal opens his arms and moves toward me.
I shake my head and step back. “I’m good, mate. Cheers.”
Cal blinks with surprise. I walk past him in the direction of the house.
The only way me staying at the Holloways will work is if I keep clear boundaries between all of us. Hugs, touching, teasing…all of it leads to attachment. And attachment leads to hurt.
Cal and Junie have had too much of that.